Disclaimer: They aren't mine.  They're owned by a bunch of rich,
powerful people who would gain

absolutely nada by bugging a poor college student. 

Author's Note: Big tyk's out to Melanie for beta'ing and the title.
You is a lifesaver! 

Wounded Heart
by Demeter, Princess of Earth
ambizworks@powerweb.net

"RAY!!"

I don't remember diving off the Ferris wheel, or Thatcher following me.
All I could see, all 

I could hear, was Ray.  Ray crumbling to the ground.  Ray's blood
pumping from the bullet hole 

in his chest.  Ray's heart slowing.  I had to get to him.  That's
all that mattered. 

Suddenly, I was beside him.  I wanted to pull him into my arms the second
my knees hit the 

ground, but my training prevented that.  Instead I pressed my hands
to the gushing hole in his 

chest, feeling the slick heat of his blood seeping through my fingers.
I barely noticed 

Thatcher leaning over me, or Ray Kowalski yelling for an ambulance.

"Ray!" I whispered, afraid to speak aloud.  "Ray, look
at me!" 

His eyes, which had been drifting closed, snapped open again and focused
on me.  "Benny?" he 

rasped.  I could barely hear him

"I'm here Ray!" I said, tears forming in my eyes.  "I'm
not gonna let you go!" 

"I...sorry, Benny," Ray said.  He closed his eyes again, clenching
them tight against the tears 

that glistened there.  

"There's nothing for you to be sorry for," I said.   //God,
don't you dare take him from me!// 

Ray nodded, ever so slightly.  "Didn't say....." he coughed
slightly, then took a breath.  

"Didn't....... say goodbye.  Didn't say......a lot." 

"There's nothing to say.  You never needed to say anything."

"Yes.  Have to....have to say this."  His breathing was getting
raspier.  It didn't matter, I 

could still hear him clearly.  "Have to tell you......."

"Tell me what Ray?"  I pressed harder against the wound, ignoring
his slight whimper of pain. I 

knew what was coming.  

"I love you," he said, so quietly.  

 I knew in that instant that if he died, I wouldn't have been able to
live.  I would follow him 

into eternity.  I felt his hand weakly brush my cheek, then fall
away.  Then he was gone, lapsed 

into unconsciousness.  I just held him tighter, as if by my touch
alone he would live.  "I know 

Ray.  I love you too." 

Then the paramedics arrived, and I was pulled off Ray.  By Kowalski and
Thatcher, I guess.  I 

say guess because I honestly don't know.  One second I was clinging
to Ray, the next Kowalski 

and the Inspector were supporting me.    They were trying to reassure
me, telling me everything 

was going to be fine, that Ray would be fine.  I don't know if I
believed them.  

I barely noticed that I was being helped into the ambulance and seated
next to Ray's stretcher. 

I do remember suddenly holding his hand again.  I have a very distinct
image of Kowalski's face 

at that moment.  He looked shocked, angry, and even a little jealous.
I didn't understand that 

until much later.

The next four hours were an agonizingly slow torture waiting for news
with the Vecchios and the 

entire 27th.

The doctor came out and said something about touch and go, about
not being out of the woods yet.  

Then we could see him.  

I let the family go in first, though it took every ounce of will I had
left not to plow into 

that room at the first opportunity.  Finally, too long in my opinion,
they came out.  A tired-

looking Tony and Maria escorted the weeping Mrs. Vecchio down the
hall as Francesca stopped 

before me.  She was talking to me, but I don't cleary recall what
she said, only that she was 

crying.  Then I was inside and next to him.

He looked terrible.  Not at all like my beloved friend, and at the same
time just like him.  I 

flashed back briefly to another hospital room, another bed, and
Ray looking just as terrible.  

God, was that only four years ago?  Seemed like eternity.  

I thought he was asleep, but I was wrong.  As I stood looking down at
his waxen face, he began 

to speak.  His voice was weak and raspy, but it was Heaven's own
music to me. 

"Just like old times, huh?" he rasped.  

"Unhappily yes." Somehow I managed a smile.  His eyes opened
and focused on me as I grasped his 

hand.  He looked like hell.  

"Don't worry, it's just a flesh wound," he grinned slightly,
then coughed.  "I always wanted to 

say that.  Don't feel as good as I thought it would."

"Ray..."  

"Hey Benny, you Mounties still always get your man?" Ray asked,
a grin pulling at his lips. 

I sighed and nodded, grinning slightly myself. "We try to, yes."

"Then go get him, Benny," he said.  "You go catch that
bastard for me." 

"But Ray..."

"Don't worry," he said, "I'll still be here when you get
back.  We'll talk then." 

"All right, Ray." He smiled then and squeezed my hand. "I'll
come back as soon as I can.  I 

promise."

"Be careful Benny," he said.  

"Aren't I always?" I smiled down at him.

"No," he grinned, eyes drifting closed.  His medication was
kicking in.  

"I have to go, Ray." I squeezed his hand one last time and
turned toward the door. 

"Good luck Benny," I heard him say just as I stepped out into
the hall. 

I sighed and headed back to the waiting room to collect Kowalski.  We
had a lot to do if we 

were to catch Muldoon quickly.  After all, I had a promise to keep.

End