Rated NC17

This is a sequel to "Thankful". Not much angst in this one at all, just lots and lots of sap. Oh, and it will be a Christmas story. Eventually.

Alliance owns these characters, and I make no claim to them by writing this story. The story is for entertainment purposes only, and no profit will be made.

I'LL BE HOME FOR CHRISTMAS

Ray Vecchio was very happy. It was the Wednesday after Thanksgiving, and Benny was coming home from the hospital.

He was on his way home right now, as a matter of fact, sitting in his usual spot in the front seat of the Riv.

Benny had been examined by Dr. Burns about an hour ago and cleared for release, with strict instructions that he was to get plenty of rest and not overdo it.

Ray grinned. Benny was going to recuperate at the Vecchio home, and with both Ray and Rosa keeping a very close eye on him, there was no chance at all that Benny would "overdo" it.

The only drawback that Ray could see was that Benny was going to be staying in the guestroom and not Ray's own room. Still, he really shouldn't be complaining. The fact that Benny was out of the hospital, coming to his home, and was on the way to being healthy again was more than enough to make him happy.

Ray pulled the car into the driveway and cut the engine. "Hey Benny," he said, shaking Ben's shoulder gently. "We're home."

Ben blinked a few times as he woke up and smiled sleepily at Ray. "Oh, good."

Grabbing Ben's bag from the back seat, Ray ran around to the passenger side and helped Ben from the car. They walked slowly into the house, Ray keeping a protective arm around Benny and Benny leaning against Ray.

The front door was opened by a smiling Rosa. "Welcome home, Benton Caro," she said.

"Thank you Ma," Ben replied, and was rewarded with a kiss on the cheek.

As they stepped into the hallway, Diefenbaker entered the hall from the other end, and Ray braced himself for the wolf's exuberant reaction to Benny.

But instead Dief walked slowly towards them and stopped in front of Ben, looking up at him and whining anxiously.

Ray looked over at Ben, puzzled, and Ben knelt down in front of his wolf. "It's all right, Dief. You did all right. You stayed and waited with me until help arrived. Thank you for helping me."

Diefenbaker whined again, but his tail was wagging slightly. Ben rubbed Dief on the head, and Dief licked Ben's face, his tail now wagging in earnest.

Ben stood up slowly, then winced and grabbed his side.

"You okay?" Ray asked anxiously.

Ben nodded. "Mmmm."

"All right, let's go up and get you settled into bed, okay?" Ray wanted to have Benny safely in the guestroom before the masses of Vecchios returned from school and work.

The two men made their way upstairs and into the guestroom. Once there Ray dropped Benny's bag in the corner, then helped Ben remove his sneakers, socks and sweatpants and tucked him into bed.

"Are you comfortable, Benny?"

"Yes."

"Are you warm enough? Do you need another blanket?"

"No Ray, I don't need another blanket. I'm fine." Ben pulled on Ray's arm, and Ray sat on the bed next to him. "I'm fine," Benny repeated.

"Okay," Ray smiled. He leaned down and gave Benny a kiss.

"Although you could sit here next to me for awhile if you wanted."

"Sure, Benny," Ray said, and Ben smiled.

Ray sat watching Benny until he fell asleep- and for quite a long time afterward- then got to work unpacking his bag.


Ray jerked awake with a start and automatically looked at his clock. 1:30 a.m. What the...

"Ray?"

"Benny?" Ray switched on the light and turned to look at his lover, who was standing just a few steps inside the door. "What's wrong?"

"I can't sleep."

"Why not?" Ray exclaimed, sitting up. "Are you okay? Are you having pain?"

Ben shook his head. "No Ray, I feel all right. It's just that the bed in my room... it's very large. And lonely."

Ray smiled at him. "Yeah, I'm having the same problem over here." He tossed back the covers and moved over.

Ben crossed the room and got into the bed, and Ray switched off the light and lay down, then carefully drew Benny down next to him. Ben sighed happily as he settled his head onto Ray's shoulder and wrapped his arms around Ray's waist.

"Better now?" Ray asked.

"Oh yes Ray. This is much better."

Ben was asleep in a matter of minutes, but Ray was wide-awake. He couldn't stop smiling from the pure pleasure of holding Benny again. It felt like his skin was tingling wherever Benny's body came into contact with it. Ray sighed and placed a kiss on the top of Fraser's head.

Benny was safe. Benny was here. Everything was going to be all right now.


Ray awoke to the sound of a knock on his door. "Come in," he mumbled sleepily.

The door opened and Rosa entered the room. When she saw Ben asleep in the bed next to Ray she paused for a moment in surprise, then turned her attention to Ray. "Raimondo, Lt. Welsh is on the phone for you."

Ray glanced at the clock and sighed. It was only a little after 9:00 in the morning. "It's my day off!"

"I know Caro, but he says it's important that he speak to you."

"All right, I'll be right there." Reluctantly, Ray left the bed- and Benny- and went to pick up the phone.

After a brief conversation with Lt. Welsh, Ray jumped in the shower, then returned to his bedroom and got dressed as quietly as he could. He was just finishing fastening his tie when Ben stirred in the bed behind him. "Ray?"

"Yeah, Benny."

"What are you doing?"

"I have to go into work for a little while."

"Is everything all right?"

"Of course it is. It's just... everything's fine, Benny. Go back to sleep."

"If you're sure everything is all right."

"I'm sure," Ray said, crossing the room to give him a kiss. "Go back to sleep now love. I'll see you later."


Ray returned home at 3:00 that afternoon, and as he entered the kitchen Rosa noticed that he looked exhausted- and upset. "Caro, what is it?"

"Where's Benny?"

"He's upstairs, in your room."

"Sleeping?"

"Reading."

Ray sank slowly into one of the kitchen chairs. Resting his elbows on the table, he buried his face in his hands with a weary sigh.

"Raimondo, what's wrong?"

Ray dropped his hands and looked at his mother. "When Lt. Welsh called this morning, he told me that they had arrested the guy that stabbed Benny- Bill, the kid that lives in Benny's building."

"But that is good news, no?"

Ray sighed, but he didn't answer Rosa's question. "Turns out Bill has a record. A nice long one. Which means he could do some serious time if he was convicted of assault with a deadly weapon.

"So of course dear sweet Bill was only too happy to plead guilty to simple assault when the D.A. offered him a plea bargain."

Rosa sat down next to Ray and placed a hand on his arm, squeezing it gently. "But he will still go to prison?"

"Yeah. But not for as long as he deserves."

"Ray..."

"No, Ma! As far as I'm concerned he shouldn't ever get out of prison. I looked at his record. He's just a nothing piece of scum who's done nothing his whole life but make trouble and do drugs.

"He shouldn't even get to be in the same world with Benny! Benny was just trying to help, like he always does, and that worthless little shit stabbed him. He just stabbed him and ran away and left him to..." Ray broke off and drew a shaky breath.

"Raimondo, Benton is going to be fine. That is what we need to concentrate on now. He is going to be healthy and strong again, and he is here with all the people who love him."

Ray stared at his mother for a minute, then gave her a kiss on the cheek. "I'm going up to see Benny now."


Benny looked up from the book he was reading as Ray entered the room, and a huge smile lit up his face. "Ray! You're home!"

"Hey Benny," Ray said, crossing to sit next to him on the bed. "How are you doing?"

"I'm doing well, Ray."

Ray nodded. "Good."

Ben took a careful look at Ray and frowned. "Ray, what's wrong?"

"They found the kid who stabbed you, and they arrested him."

"You don't seem very happy about it."

"I was at first, but then..." Ray's voice trailed off.

Sudden understanding dawned on Ben's face. "What did he plead to?"

A harsh sigh. "Assault."

"Ah." Ben looked away for a minute, then looked back with a small smile. "I guess that's the best we could have hoped for."

"The best?" Ray was still outraged- and angered that Benny seemed to be taking it with such calm acceptance. "He should be charged with assault with a deadly weapon- at least! For God's sake, the guy-"

"I know what he did, Ray," Ben interrupted quietly.

Ray looked down at Ben, all his anger gone in an instant. "Oh God Benny, I'm sorry." He drew Ben into his arms and held him gently. "I'm sorry."

He could feel Benny shaking slightly, and he cursed himself. 'Good one, Vecchio. Way to go.'

After a minute, Ben spoke again. "Of course I wish he would get a harsher penalty, Ray. But there is some benefit to this. It's over now, and we can put it behind us and move on with our lives."

He pulled away and leaned back against the pillows. "And there's also the chance that if this did go to trial, he would be found not guilty."

Ray made a noise of disgust. "Yeah, I can see it now. The little bastard up on the stand whining that he had a hard, sad life and making the jury feel sorry for him.

"But what he did to you, Benny..."

"Ray, I'm fine."

Ray looked at Benny in disbelief. Benny, who was looking completely exhausted after sitting up in bed reading for a few hours; and who needed Ray's help going up and down the stairs because he was still too weak to make it on his own.

"Well, I'm going to be fine," Ben smiled.

"Yeah," Ray said.

"I'm glad it's over, Ray. I don't want him in our lives anymore. He doesn't belong there."

"No he doesn't," Ray agreed, giving Ben a kiss.

Ray picked the book up off the bed and placed it on the nightstand. "Why don't you get some sleep now, Benny? You look worn out."

"Will you stay with me?"

"Of course I will," Ray answered; and Ben smiled happily.


Over the next two weeks Ben's condition continued to improve. On his second night at the Vecchio home his belongings had been moved into Ray's room, and he had been staying there ever since.

The combined effects of lots of rest and relaxation, many hearty portions of Rosa's home cooking, and sleeping next to Ray every night helped Benny regain his health and strength at a rapid pace.

It was a very happy day for Benny when he felt well enough to go outside for a walk. It was a short walk, but Ben didn't care. He was exercising again, he was outdoors again, and best of all he was with Ray.

They walked the block around the Vecchio house twice. Benny and Ray held hands as they walked, not giving a damn if the neighbors saw or not.

They walked slowly up the driveway and climbed the porch; and at the top of the porch steps Ben stopped and turned to Ray. "Let's not go in just yet." He led Ray over to the glider swing and they sat down. "This is wonderful, isn't it Ray?"

Ray looked at his lover. Benny's face was rosy with the fresh air and the cold, and his eyes were sparkling with happiness. For once, Ray didn't mind the cold at all. "Yes Benny. Wonderful."

The men rocked quietly together for a few minutes, then Ray drew a deep breath and cleared his throat. "Actually Benny, I'm glad we have some quiet time to ourselves."

"Oh?" Ben grinned, a gleam in his eyes.

Ray remained serious, however. "Yes. There's something I've been wanting to discuss with you, Benny."

"What's that?"

"I want... I wonder if... I mean, would you-" Ray broke off. Dammit, why was this so hard to say? He had practiced it a hundred times!

"Ray?" Ben was watching him with a look of infinite patience.

Ray took another deep breath and plunged in. "I want us to move in together, Benny."

Ben looked surprised, but a smile was spreading slowly across his face. "You do?"

"Yes, Benny. We need to get you out of that hell-hole on Racine. I don't want you there anymore."

Ben's face fell, and he quickly looked away.

"Benny?" Ray asked in confusion.

Ben looked down into his lap, still not able to meet Ray's gaze. "That's why you want us to move in together? Because you don't like the apartment I'm in now?"

Ray's heart dropped as he realized what he had just said. "Oh God, Benny, no! I'm sorry, that came out all the wrong way!"

Ben looked back up at him.

"I won't lie to you. I'll be happy as hell to get you out of that place. I've never liked you living there; I'm never comfortable leaving you there alone.

"And I hate it now more than ever. The thought of you ever going back to that place..." Ray broke off and shivered.

"Ray, I..."

"Sssh," Ray smiled, squeezing Ben's hand. "But getting you out of there would just be the icing on the cake.

"I want to live with you because I don't want to waste one minute of our time together. Life is too short Benny; and too uncertain. Especially in our line of work. And if anything ever did happen, I wouldn't want either one of us to have any regrets.

"God Benny, those nights you were in the hospital- they were horrible. Just like any night we're apart. I could barely fall asleep on my own; and I never got a good night's rest because you weren't there beside me.

"I want us to live together because I want to fall asleep lying next to you every single night for the rest of my life. And if I wake up in the middle of the night I want to feel you there next to me.

"I don't want to have to schedule time to see you ever again. I don't want to be in the middle of a busy day and wonder 'Gee, will I be able to see Benny tonight?' I want to know that when I get home, you're going to be there.

"And I want you to have all that, too. I want-"

Ray's words were cut off as Benny took his face between his hands and drew him into a deep kiss.

Ray broke the kiss and smiled at Benny. "Does that mean yes?"

"Yes Ray. It means yes. There is nothing I would like more in this world than to move in with you."

"Benny..." Ray couldn't think of any more words, so he drew Benny into another kiss.


Over the following week Ray and Benny worked out a plan for apartment hunting. First they each drew up a list of their requirements for the new apartment.

Ray's list contained many items, among them central heat and air conditioning, cable service, washer and dryer hookups, and a large kitchen. Ben's list read simply: "The building must accept pets."

Once they had their lists compiled, Ray and Benny went through the paper, searching out a list of possibilities. While Ray was at work one day Benny called all the apartments on the list for further information and narrowed the list of possibilities to six.

Ray then went and checked one or two of the possibilities after work each night, until he had a list of four apartments that he thought would be to both his and Benny's liking.

The two men made plans to go and look at the four apartments together on Ray's next day off. Ben was very excited at the prospect. This would be his first real outing since he'd been hospitalized.

Ben and Ray were up bright and early the morning of the great apartment hunt; both men eager and excited to find their new home.

As they walked into the lobby of the first building, Benny felt a small shiver run through him. It was really going to happen. He had known he and Ray were moving in together of course; he had thought of little else since they had made that decision. But being here with Ray now, actually looking at apartments, made it seem real for the first time. He smiled at Ray as they entered the manager's office.

The manager, Sam Swenson according to the nameplate on his desk, stood up and came around the desk to shake Ray's hand. He had brown hair and light blue eyes; and he was wearing wire-rimmed glasses and the politely friendly expression of someone who was used to being nice to people for a living. "Hello again, Mr. Vecchio. How are you today?"

"I'm fine," Ray answered.

"And this is your friend?"

"Benton Fraser," Ben said, shaking the man's hand.

"Nice to meet you," smiled Sam. "Let's go look at the apartment, all right?"

The three men rode in the elevator to the fifth floor, and the manager led them down the hall to apartment 521.

The apartment was lovely, with a large living room well lit by picture windows on the east wall, a spacious kitchen with ample counter space, and a good-sized bedroom and bathroom.

"And check out this view, Benny!" Ray said, leading the way to the living room windows.

"You're doing my job for me," Sam said with a laugh.

Ben looked out the window and smiled widely. He could see another apartment building across the street, and beyond that a small neighborhood park, with plenty of grass and benches and walking paths.

He reached out and took Ray's hand, and Ray intertwined his fingers with Benny's, squeezing his hand gently. They stared out at the view for a few more moments, then turned back to face Sam.

The building manager had changed expression completely. He had a frown on his face as he stared at Ray and Benny- or rather, as he stared at their joined hands. "You two are... well..."

Ray and Benny both tensed, their hearts sinking. "What?" Asked Ray.

"You know... gay." The man spoke the word as if it was a curse.

"Yes we are," Ray said.

"You didn't mention that the other day."

Ben tried to let go of Ray's hand, but Ray wouldn't let him; tightening his grip on his lover's hand. "That's because it doesn't matter."

"Actually, it does. You see, you may not feel comfortable here. This isn't your kind of place."

"Excuse me?" Said Benny.

"Well, this isn't a gay neighborhood."

Ray stared at the other man, speechless for a moment with anger and disbelief.

It was Benny who found his voice first. "You're right, Mr. Swenson. We wouldn't feel comfortable here. Neither Ray nor I are judgmental or a bigot, so this is indeed not 'our kind of place'. I'm sorry to have wasted your time." He turned on his heel and strode from the room, leaving Ray staring after him in surprise.

Ray recovered himself and with a last dirty look followed Ben from the apartment. He took the elevator down to the lobby and went outside to find Benny standing next to the Riv, his back to the building. "Benny?" Ray said, placing a hand on Ben's shoulder.

Ben turned to face him. "I'm sorry, Ray."

"Don't you dare apologize, Benny. I'm proud of you. You actually let yourself get angry, and you told that guy off."

"He had no right to do that, Ray. To make assumptions about us and judge us without even knowing us."

"I know that, Benny. But it's his loss. He just lost two great tenants. If he doesn't want a couple of nice clean quiet cops living in his building, screw him."

"Actually, Ray, I'm sure neither one of us would enjoy that."

Ray burst into laughter, then stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Ben's waist. "So, do you think he's watching us out the window?"

"I'm almost sure of it," Ben answered with a grin.

"Good," Ray said, then leaned forward for a long kiss. Pulling away from Ben, he smiled at him. "Come on love, let's get the hell out of here."


Ben and Ray went to the second apartment on their list and looked it over, and they came away feeling rather unimpressed. The location was excellent- in fact, that was the reason the apartment had made the final list- but there was nothing that really set it apart; that made it feel like someplace Ray and Benny could turn into a home.

So they crossed it off their list and headed out for the next address on their list.

As they got out of the Riv, Ben looked carefully at the building, then looked over at Ray with a smile.

The building was a large, old wooden-frame house that had been converted into four apartments. The home sat on a street of similar houses, and all the houses and yards were obviously well cared for.

They walked up the porch and through the front door and Ray opened a door on the left and led Benny inside. They entered a small office containing a desk and chair and several file cabinets. On the wall opposite the desk was a door marked 'Private'.

A man was seated behind the desk; and he looked up as Benny and Ray entered the room. He appeared to be about thirty years of age and he had sparkling blue eyes, auburn hair and a large smile.

He stood up and hurried around the desk. "Ray! How great to see you again!"

"Thanks, Barry. Benny, this is Barry Poore; he's the manager. Barry, meet Benton Fraser."

"Hey Benton, how are you doing?"

"Call me Ben, please." Benny found himself warming to the other man right away. "So, you manage the building?"

The other man grinned. "I'm manager, groundskeeper, repair man, sometime delivery man, problem solver..."

"Ah," Ben nodded.

"Come on, let's go up and show you the apartment." He led Benny and Ray up a gently curving staircase and to the door of apartment 4.

The front door opened into a large, airy, living room, with a brick fireplace against one wall. A bay window with a window seat was next to the fireplace.

A door directly across from the entrance door opened into a spacious bedroom, with the bathroom off the bedroom.

The door to the kitchen was opposite the fireplace, and Barry showed them the kitchen with an air of special pride. There was ample counter and cabinet space, and all the appliances were new. The highlight of the room was a large butcher-block table, and Ray looked at it with a touch of longing in his eyes.

Ben grinned as he saw his lover's reaction. Barry finished giving them the tour of the apartment and answered their questions, and Benny and Ray left with a bit of reluctance. They got in the Riv and started towards the last address on their list.

They had driven about ten blocks when Ben spoke. "Ray, that next apartment on our list..."

"Yeah?"

"What is it like?"

Ray glanced over at Benny with a smile. "It's okay. Nice neighborhood, nice place, nothing spectacular."

"So it's not as nice as the last one?"

"I don't think so."

"I don't think it will be, either. I just have a feeling about that last place, Ray. Like it's meant to be home. Does that make any sense at all?"

"Actually, Benny, it makes perfect sense," Ray smiled.

"Really?"

"Absolutely. That place feels like it belongs to us, you know?"

Ben nodded. "So, we can end our search right now?"

"Yes." Ray pulled into a parking lot, turned the car around and headed back up the street.


Barry looked up as Ray and Benny entered his office. "You weren't gone very long." He seemed happy but not surprised to see them.

"No," Ray said. "We talked a little bit, and we decided that we want to take the apartment."

"I knew it!" Barry exclaimed. He smiled at Benny and Ray's surprised looks. "I've been doing this for a while. I get feelings about things. I can usually tell when people are right for an apartment.

"Come on and sit down and fill out an application."

They all crossed back over to his desk, and Ray and Benny filled out their applications and handed them back to Barry. He read them over quickly and glanced back up at the men. "Cops, huh?"

"Yes," Ben answered.

"Excellent. All right, let me enter this into the computer and do a couple checks, then I can print up the lease and have it ready for you to sign. It should take about forty-five minutes."

Ben and Ray smiled happily and took each other's hand.

Barry noticed. "You're a couple?" He asked.

"Yeah," Ray said defiantly, remembering what had happened earlier.

"I thought so." Barry was grinning at them. "Like I said, I get feelings about things. About people."

"And you don't have a problem with it?" Ray asked.

Barry picked up a framed photo from next to his computer and showed it to Ray and Benny. In the picture, Barry was standing arm in arm with another man. The man had dark hair and green eyes and a smile almost identical to Barry's.

"Ron and I live in that apartment," Barry said, pointing to the door marked 'Private'. "We're going to be neighbors."

Benny and Ray relaxed and smiled in happy relief.

Barry opened the top drawer of his desk and pulled out a key. "You can go back up and have another look around if you want. You've got some time to kill."

Ray and Benny happily took the key and went upstairs to the apartment that would soon be theirs. They walked slowly through each room, planning how they would decorate it.

They spent the most time in the kitchen, Ray talking happily about all the wonderful meals he would prepare there; and the parties they would throw.

They walked back out to the living room. "These hardwood floors are great, Benny. I think we should get a couple of throw rugs though. What do you think?"

There was no answer, and Ray turned to look at his lover. "Benny?"

Ben was staring out the window, smiling happily, and he seemed a million miles away. "Hmmm?" He said, bringing himself back to the present. "Oh, yes. Whatever you want, Ray."

"No, Benny. It has to be what we want. I want you to like it here, too."

"How could I not like it here, Ray? I'm going to be living here with you. This is going to be our home, Ray. It's going to be ours. It's going to be perfect."

Ray smiled at Benny and moved closer, and the two men shared their first kiss in their new home.


Ray swallowed nervously and glanced over at Benny, who was seated next to him in the passenger seat of the Riv. It was moving day for him and Benny. Most of their belongings were already packed up and waiting at the Vecchio house.

They were now headed over to Benny's apartment on Racine, and Ray was not too happy at all about it. Benny had approached him the day before and told him he wanted to go back to the apartment to get his belongings.

Ray had exploded. "No way Benny! You're not going back there!"

"Ray, I need to get my trunk, and a few other things as well."

"I'll go get them then. I don't want you going back there."

"Ray, please. I want to go. I want to say goodbye to the old apartment, and to my neighbors."

"Benny..."

"And I also want to prove that I'm not afraid to go back there. That I'm not running away and hiding."

"Prove it to who?" Ray asked in surprise.

"To myself."

Ray looked at Benny and caved in with a sigh. "All right. But I'm going with you."

"All right Ray. Thank you."


Ray and Benny entered apartment 3J and stood looking around with different emotions.

Ray eyed the apartment distastefully, with disgust and a slight degree of nervousness.

Ben, however, was feeling a little wistful. He was glad to be moving in with Ray, and he was excited about their new apartment, but he had fond memories of this place, too. He was going to miss his old neighbors.

He was also going to miss the apartment itself. He and Ray had had many good times here. Of course, Ben reflected, starting to smile, he and Ray would be able to have plenty of good times in the new apartment, as well. Every night if they wanted.

"Hey Benny," Ray's voice broke into his thoughts. "You ready?"

Ben turned to him. "Yes Ray."

"Good." Ray picked up Benny's trunk and headed for the door.

"Can I help you with that?"

"No."

Ben sighed and shook his head and followed after his lover.


The move went surprisingly well, with no major hitches. Many of the items they needed were already in place. Benny and Ray had gone furniture shopping the day after they signed their lease and chosen a living room set; which had been delivered and set in place the day before.

The two men had also gone grocery shopping and the kitchen was completely stocked with food, and all the cleaning and personal items they needed were also in place.

While they had been busy shopping, Rosa had been measuring for, selecting and hanging curtains. She had told the "boys" to trust her taste, and she had chosen well.

All that was left was to move Ray's bedroom set, and the clothes and personal items to the apartment.

They borrowed a van from one of the Vecchio's neighbors and loaded it, along with the Riv. Ray, Benny, and the adult Vecchios (except for Rosa, who was staying behind to watch the children) fit themselves into the vehicles, and the two-car caravan headed off to the new apartment.

When they got there, Ray and Tony started wrestling the furniture from the van and up the stairs to the apartment while everyone else carried boxes inside.

After the dresser had been moved inside Benny approached Ray. "Ray, I wish you would let me help move the furniture. I could at least carry in the nightstands."

"No way, Benny."

"Ray, I'm just as capable as you or Tony."

"The difference is, Tony and I aren't recovering from major surgery."

"That was weeks ago, Ray. I-"

"No," Ray interrupted. "I don't want you pushing yourself, Benny. You move any furniture, you could wind up back in the emergency room."

Ben stared at Ray for a minute, trying to figure out if that had been a caution or a threat. Finally he sighed and went to get another box from the van.


With the help of the Vecchio family, unloading the van and the Riv took only a couple hours. Once all the boxes were inside and in their proper rooms, Ray and Benny ordered pizzas delivered and they all had lunch, using boxes for chairs and tables.

After lunch the rest of the family left and Ray and Benny got to work unpacking the many, many boxes. They had been working for a little over an hour when they heard a knock on the door.

Ray went and opened the door and found Barry standing there, along with his lover.

"Hi," Barry said, smiling warmly. "I just wanted to give you an official welcome to the building. And I want to introduce you to Ron."

Ben walked over to stand next to Ray.

"Hi Ben," Barry smiled. "Ben Fraser, Ray Vecchio, this is Ron Murray. Ron, this is Ben and Ray, our new neighbors."

"Nice to meet you." Ron smiled and shook their hands. "I hope you'll be happy here."

"It's great so far," Ray grinned. "Once we get all the boxes unpacked I think we'll like it even better."

"Yes, that should improve things," Barry agreed.

"Look, we don't want to keep you," Ron said, "we just wanted to say hi. And to tell you we'd love to have you over for dinner one night next week if you're available."

"Yeah, that'd be great. And we're available, right Benny?"

"Yes. That would be very nice, thank you."

"Great!" Barry said happily. "I'll come up and see you early next week and we'll get it all set up."

"All right," Ben nodded.

 

"We'll let you get back to work now," Ron said with a mischievous grin; "have fun."

The two men headed down to their apartment. Ray closed the door behind them and turned to look at Benny. Ben was looking at him with the same happy smile that Ray could feel on his own face. "Oh yeah, Benny. I think we're going to like it here."


Ben tossed a couple of cardboard boxes into the dumpster, then stretched and sighed. He and Ray had been working non-stop for hours, unpacking boxes and sorting belongings and putting them away. It was now fully dark, and Ben was more than ready to call it a day.

He walked back inside and up to the apartment, where he found Ray in the kitchen, busily putting glasses in the cupboard. Ben gently closed the cupboard and led Ray by the hand into the living room, where he sat them both down on the couch.

"Benny, what are you doing?"

"We're done for the night, Ray. It's time to relax now."

"Benny, we're almost done!"

"Then it won't take us long to finish tomorrow, will it?"

Ray's protests were cut off as Ben began massaging his shoulders. "Maybe you're right," Ray said, leaning against his lover with a contented sigh.

Ben gave Ray a kiss on the cheek, then was off the couch and moving towards the bedroom.

"Benny?"

"I'll be right back."

True to his word, Ben returned to the living room less than a minute later. He was carrying a large square box wrapped in green paper and topped with a red bow.

"What's this?" Ray asked.

"It's a combination housewarming/early Christmas gift."

"You didn't have to get me a present."

"I wanted to."

"Well okay then," Ray grinned, and tore the wrapping off the box. When he opened the lid and saw what was inside the box, he paused and looked up at Fraser. "Oh Benny..."

"Do you like it?" Ben asked nervously. "I know that having a nativity scene is important to you, and you always used your mother's set at home. I thought we should have one of our own. Is it okay?"

"Oh Benny, it's beautiful." Ray picked up one of the figures and ran a finger over it. The pieces were crafted down to the smallest detail and painted in soft muted colors.

"Good," Ben smiled. "I thought it might look nice on the table next to the front door."

"Excellent idea," Ray said.

He carried the box over to the table and Benny rushed back into the bedroom and returned carrying a plastic bag filled with straw. "I also went to the craft store," he told Ray with a proud smile.

"Good job, Benny."


They spent the next half-hour meticulously setting up the nativity scene. Finally, Ray gave one last adjustment to the baby Jesus figure and declared the scene perfect.

Ben moved to stand behind Ray, wrapping his arms around his waist and resting his chin on Ray's shoulder.

Gradually Ray became aware that he was half-asleep leaning against Benny, and Benny was half-asleep leaning against him. So he reluctantly pulled out of Benny's arms and led him into the bedroom.

Once there the two men quickly stripped to their underwear and climbed into bed. Ben lay on his side and Ray snuggled up against Benny's back, wrapping his arms around Ben's waist. "You okay, Benny?"

"Mmmm. A few muscle aches, but that's only to be expected."

"How's your back?"

"How is my back?" Ben was surprised at the question.

"Yeah," Ray said, slipping his hand under Ben's t-shirt to gently caress the scar on his back. "It's not hurting, is it? You didn't strain it today?"

Ben started laughing and rolled over so he was lying face to face with Ray. "Ray, how on earth could I have possibly strained my back today? You wouldn't allow me to carry anything weighing more than two pounds."

"Well, I was worried about you, Benny."

Ray sounded embarrassed, and Ben gave him a gentle kiss. "I know you were, love. But honestly, I'm fine."

"Okay, okay. But don't ask me to stop worrying about you."

"Oh, I wouldn't."

"Really?"

"Yes. I like it. You get carried away with it sometimes, Ray. But I like having someone in my life who cares enough about me to worry about me. To be concerned over my well-being.

"I was alone for a long time, and I didn't have that. Now that I have it again, I like it." Now Ben was the one sounding embarrassed.

Ray tightened his arms around Benny, pulling him closer. "It's a good thing you do like it, Benny. Because I'm not going to stop. Not ever. You got that?"

"Yes, Ray."

"Good. Go to sleep now, my love."

"All right. Good night, Ray."

"Good night."

The two men settled more comfortably against each other, and within five minutes they were both sound asleep.


Ray awoke with a sharp gasp. Benny was sitting up in the bed next to him, breathing harshly.

"Benny?" Ray put a gentle hand on Ben's shoulder, and Ben started and looked over at him.

"Nightmare?" Ray asked quietly, and Ben nodded.

Ray sat up and slipped an arm around Ben's waist, and Benny leaned against him, wrapping both arms around Ray and clinging to him.

"It's okay Benny." Ray could feel Benny shaking, and he ran his hand gently over Benny's back. "It's all right, love. You're home, Benny. You're safe. I'm here. I've got you; you're okay."

He continued holding Benny and talking quietly to him until Ben stopped shaking. Ray lay back down and pulled Benny down against his chest. Ben wrapped his arms around Ray's waist again, and settled against him.

"Was it the same dream you kept having in the hospital?"

Ben nodded. "Yes," he answered in a voice that was shaking slightly.

They lay quietly for a while, Ray gently stroking Benny's hair. "I haven't had that nightmare in almost a week," Ben finally said.

"I know."

"They're getting farther and farther apart. That most likely means that they will stop altogether before long."

Ray heard the note of hope in Ben's voice, and felt a lump forming in his throat. "I'm sure it does, Benny."

Ray closed his eyes and wished fervently that he could have five minutes alone in a room with Benny's attacker. Well, maybe not alone. He would let Dief come with him.

Forcing those negative thoughts away, he placed a kiss on the top of Benny's head. He lay awake, holding Benny until he felt Benny relax completely against him and slip into sleep; then allowed himself to fall asleep as well.


The first days Ray and Benny spent in their new apartment were busy and happy ones. They spent time setting up the apartment and arranging things- then re-arranging them.

They got to know the neighbors and began to learn about their neighborhood. Where the nearest shops were, the nicest routes for taking walks, the best route to the local park.

They gradually began to feel settled and comfortable; and the apartment took on more of the feel of a home, rather than just a place they were staying.

Ben had a checkup with Dr. Burns scheduled for the Wednesday after they moved in. The night before the appointment, Ray came home with some bad news. "I can't take you tomorrow, Benny. They moved up the preliminary hearing in the Taylor case and I'm going to be tied up in court all day."

"Oh. Well, that's all right, Ray. I understand. I'll find some other way to get there."

"Why don't you ask Ma?"

Ben opened his mouth, probably to make an objection or protestation, then he thought for a moment and nodded. "I'll do that, Ray. I'm sure Ma would be happy to help me out. Excuse me."

He went to place the call, and Ray watched him thoughtfully. It was nice to Benny finally starting to view himself as a member of the family; to think of himself not as an imposition but someone who deserved help from the family when needed.

Ray smiled. Maybe this court hearing wasn't such a bad thing after all.


Ray walked into the kitchen and placed the bags of Chinese food on the counter with a tired sigh. He turned around as Ben entered the kitchen.

"Ray! How did things go in court today?"

"Horrible, Benny. We were there all damn day and not one thing was accomplished."

"Oh, that's good," Ben said absently.

"Benny?"

Ben turned his full attention on Ray with a smile. "Ask me how my appointment went, Ray."

Ray grinned. "How did your appointment go, Benny?"

"Very well." He gave Ray a long kiss. "Dr. Burns said, and I'm quoting him directly, that I could resume all my normal physical activities."

Ray's eyes lit up. "You mean..."

Ben nodded. "I mean." He pulled Ray into another lingering kiss.

Ray broke the kiss. "I... brought dinner," he said; then could have kicked himself. Dinner?!

"We'll eat dinner later," Ben said. Wrapping his arms around Ray's waist, Ben kissed him again and started walking them towards the bedroom.

Ray returned the kiss with a great deal of enthusiasm, slipping his tongue into Benny's mouth and plunging both hands into Benny's hair.

They shuffled and stumbled their way into the bedroom and over to the bed, dropping down onto the bed.

Ben pulled away suddenly, breaking the kiss.

"Benny?" Ray gasped, slightly out of breath.

"Ray, I..."

"What, baby?" Ray asked gently.

"I... it's just... it's been so long since we've made love, and I'm not at 100% strength yet. I just don't want to disappoint you, Ray."

"Oh Benny," Ray said, "you could never disappoint me."

"Ray..."

"No, Benny. Don't worry about being at full strength. We're just going to take it nice and easy. We're not going to be attempting any great acrobatic feats here." He reached out and cupped Benny's face in his hand. "We're going to be making love."

Benny felt a shiver run through him. "All right, Ray." He smiled and slid Ray's suit jacket off him, then removed his tie. He tried to remove Ray's shirt, but his hands were shaking slightly and he had trouble with the buttons.

Ray pushed his hands away and quickly unfastened and removed his shirt. Ben smiled happily and ran his hands over Ray's chest, then leaned forward to trail a series of light teasing kisses over the warm skin.

Ray pulled Benny's head away and placed a quick kiss against his lips, cutting off his protest. He quickly unbuttoned Ben's flannel shirt and tossed it aside, and Ben pulled off his t-shirt.

He turned back to find Ray looking at him, his expression serious, almost somber. "Ray, what is it?"

Ray didn't answer. He was staring at the scars from Benny's knife wound and the surgery; the two overlapping scars showing up vivid and red and ugly against Benny's white skin.

"Oh." Ben shifted uncomfortably. "Listen, Ray, if you..."

He broke off as Ray reached out and trailed a finger lightly over the area, then bent down and placed a series of feather-light kisses over the scars. Moving away from the scars, Ray kissed his way up Benny's body and captured his mouth in another kiss.

He gently pushed Benny down into a reclining position. He broke the kiss and Benny smiled up at him and stroked his face.

Ray smiled back and began unfastening Ben's jeans, and Benny kicked off his shoes. Ray slid Ben's jeans and underwear off in one motion and threw them to the floor. He looked down at Ben and smiled. "My beautiful Benny," he whispered.

Ben smiled shakily and started to unfasten Ray's pants. His hands were still shaking, but with Ray's help he was able to get them removed.

Ray leaned down for another long, slow kiss and Ben began running his hands over Ray's body, from his back down to his ass and back up again. Ben pulled away, breathing in short, harsh gasps. "Ray... Ray..."

"Ssh, baby," Ray whispered, stroking Ben's ribs lightly. "It's okay. Relax, Benny. Relax, it's all right." He rained a series of light kisses over Benny's face: his eyes, his forehead, his cheeks, his nose.

Ben brought his hand up to the back of Ray's head and guided him to his lips. Ray gladly slipped his tongue between Ben's lips, enjoying the taste and feel of his lover's mouth.

Ben broke the kiss and smiled at Ray, his eyes shining. "Love me, Ray," he whispered.

Ray gave a small half-sob and positioned himself above Benny, bracing himself with his arms, then lowered his hips down so that his cock was brushing against Benny's.

Ben gasped harshly at the contact, and Ray began moving against him, rubbing their cocks together again and again.

The room was soon filled with the sounds of the mingled moans and gasps of the two men. Ray tried to hold on for as long as he could, but it had been so long, and he was so wound up that he knew he wouldn't be able to last for long.

With a loud cry he came; and he felt his arm muscles start to give way. Ray lowered himself to the bed as gently as he could, draping his body over Benny's.

Ben was still thrusting urgently against him and after a few seconds Ray heard Ben cry out sharply and felt the warmth of Ben's seed against his body.

Ray sighed and lay limply on top of Benny for a few minutes, trying to get his breathing back to normal. Eventually he raised himself up onto one elbow and looked down at his lover.

Benny was lying still, breathing unevenly, his white face bathed in sweat. "Benny, you okay?"

There was no answer.

"Benny?"

A smile slowly crossed Ben's face. "Hmmmmm," he said contentedly. It was more of a sigh than an actual word, but it was enough for Ray.

He brushed the damp hair off of Benny's forehead and placed a kiss on the sweaty brow. Benny reached up and tugged on Ray's arm and Ray happily lay back down on Ben's chest.

"I missed this, Ray," Ben said, stroking Ray's back lightly. "I missed you. I missed having all of you."

"I missed it too, Benny."

They lay quietly together until Ray started feeling chilly. He and Benny were lying on top of the covers, and Ray had neither the strength or energy to get off the bed, turn down the covers, then get back in bed.

He sat up and grabbed the quilt that was folded up on the end of the bed. "Hey Benny," he smiled, "I think we can wait a while longer before eating dinner, don't you?"

There was no answer, and Ray turned to look at his lover. Benny was asleep.

Ray smiled and unfolded the quilt, then lay down next to Benny again. Covering them both with the quilt, Ray placed his head on Benny's chest and drifted off to sleep.


As soon as Ray and Benny had gotten fully settled into their apartment, it was time to start getting ready for Christmas. The first item of business was getting the Christmas tree. Both men were traditionalists in that area, and they didn't even consider getting an artificial tree.

Ray took a day off of work and they drove out into the countryside to a tree farm the Vecchio family had visited every year since Ray was a little boy. He and Benny walked through the woods, looking at trees and discussing them, debating which one was the perfect tree for their home.

After about an hour of searching, they found a tree that they both agreed was just right.

They cut down the tree and dragged it back to the car- Benny insisting upon doing his share of the work- then tied it to the roof of the Riv and took it home. Once in the apartment, the tree was set up in its place of honor in the bay window.

After a long break for lunch and a nap, they decorated the tree, then got to work on the rest of the apartment.

They hung garland on the mantle and put lights in the kitchen and bedroom windows. A Christmas tablecloth covered the dining room table, and Christmas candles were placed on the coffee table. The Christmas cards they had already received were taped in place on the back of the front door, and a sprig of mistletoe was hung just inside the front door.

Ray was just putting the last of the boxes away when Benny approached him. "Ray, I would like to put this out as well, if it's all right with you."

He was holding a porcelain angel. The doll was wearing a dress of pure-white lace and holding a candle. She had flowing blonde hair, blue eyes, and a shimmering halo. She had a small, beautiful smile on her face, and she seemed to exude peace and serenity.

"That's beautiful, Benny! Where did you get it?"

"It was my mother's. Dad gave it to her the first year they were married."

Ray looked from Benny back to the angel, then walked wordlessly over to the fireplace. There was a miniature Christmas tree on the mantle, and Ray removed it and placed it one of the packing boxes.

Ben smiled and walked over to the fireplace and gently and carefully placed the angel doll on the mantle. Ray walked over to Benny and slipped an arm around his waist. "That looks perfect, Benny."

Ben looked at him, happiness and love shining in his eyes. "Thank you, Ray."


In the days that followed, Ray and Benny made many shopping trips- both together to purchase gifts for the rest of the family and separately to purchase gifts for each other. Soon the space under the tree was filled with many brightly wrapped packages.

Their days and nights were busy with Christmas preparations and Christmas parties, but by Christmas Eve things had calmed down and they were able to spend a relaxing day and evening at home before going to church to meet the rest of the Vecchio family for midnight Mass.

They got to the church about forty-five minutes early. This was necessary to make sure they all got a seat, as the family filled an entire pew.

The adults sat talking quietly, but the children, especially five year old Theresa, were increasingly restless. Finally Ben gestured to the little girl, and she walked over to him and was taken onto his lap, and he began talking quietly to her.

Ray could overhear what Benny was saying, and he smiled as he listened to his lover tell his niece stories of his Christmases back in the Territories.

The little girl sat quiet and attentive, and seemed disappointed when the Mass started.


After Mass, the family lingered outside in the parking lot, talking and making plans for the next day. Finally they broke up and went to their separate cars, with plans for Ray and Benny to join the family for dinner early in the afternoon.

Ray and Benny drove to the apartment in comfortable silence, Ben humming along softly with the Christmas carols on the radio.

They got to the apartment and were greeted by an enthusiastic Diefenbaker. "Merry Christmas, Dief," Ben said, petting his wolf.

Ray looked at the lights of the tree glowing in the dark room and smiled. "Come on Benny." He took his lover by the hand and led him over to the tree, and the two men sat down. They sat admiring the tree for a little while, and then Ray spoke again. "You know Benny, as long as we're here..."

Ben laughed. "Is there a certain Vecchio tradition you would like us to continue? Perhaps the one where we each open a gift on Christmas Eve?"

"Well, if you want to, Benny."

Ben laughed again, and reached under the tree. After scrambling around for a few moments, he pulled out a gift and handed it to Ray.

"I don't get to pick which present I open?"

"No."

Ray sighed, but tore the wrappings off the present and tossed them aside. Lifting the lid off the box, he smiled happily. "Benny, these are great!" He ran his hand over the pajamas inside the box. "100% silk!"

"Yes."

"Italian silk?"

"Of course!"

"Cool!"

"Go put them on, Ray."

"Really?"

"Yes please."

"All right."

Ray took his pajamas into the bedroom to change into them, and Ben sat looking at the tree until a gentle nudge on his arm broke into his thoughts. He turned to see Diefenbaker staring at him. "What?"

Dief looked at him pleadingly and whined.

"Oh, so you think you should participate in the tradition as well?"

Another eager whine.

Ben smiled at his wolf, then rummaged under the tree again. "Let's see what we can do." He pulled out a package and placed it on the floor in front of Dief. "I believe this one is for you."

Dief gave a short, happy bark and ripped the paper from the present with his teeth and claws, then started happily chewing on the rawhide bone inside the wrappings.

Ben sat watching him and smiling, until he heard a light footstep behind him. He turned and saw Ray standing just a few feet away, and he caught his breath.

The pajamas fit Ray like they had been made just for him, and the silver-gray color enhanced his eyes perfectly. The lights of the tree were shining off the soft material, and Ray looked like a dream. "Come here," Ben said, holding out a hand to his lover.

Ray took the few steps to Ben's side and sat down. Ben kissed him, running his hands over Ray's silk-clad arms and back. "Oh, that feels so nice, Ray. It's too bad that you won't be in these pajamas for much longer."

"Yeah, just be careful not to rip them, okay?"

Ben stared at him in surprise for a moment, then he laughed.

Ray grinned at him, then turned and selected a small package from under the tree. "Okay, your turn, Benny."

"Thank you." Ben carefully removed the bow and paper, then pulled open the lid of the box. "Oh, Ray..."

He held up his gift. It was a wooden Christmas tree ornament in the shape of a log cabin. The cabin had snow on the roof and lights glowing in the windows. Across the bottom of the ornament were the words "Our first Christmas in our new home."

Ben sat admiring it for a few moments, then gave Ray a kiss. "Let's hang it up right now." He stood up, pulling Ray to his feet as well.

Together, they hung the ornament in a place of prominence on the front of the tree. Ben looked at the ornament with a smile, then turned his smile on Ray. "Merry Christmas, Ray."

"Merry Christmas, Benny."

Ray took him by the hand and led him towards the bedroom. Out in the living room, Dief lay under the tree, dozing happily, while above him the Christmas lights shone on the roof of a log cabin ornament.

THE END

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