Title: Alex's story
Author: Bertie
Email: bermille@earthlink.net
Status: WIP
Notes: This is an AU-- no Consortium, no aliens,
no government conspiracy except for what we have in our own world. This
is my first fic that is first person POV. It's Alex's POV where he
recounts events of his life. He's just an ordinary, average guy who
falls for a slightly more average guy. Thanks to Mikou, Georgia and Sam
for their betas and suggestions.
Warning: there is a mention of uncle/nephew incest in the beginning.
Skip that part if its squicky.
I was twelve when my father left my mother and me. She was devastated
because she thought her husband loved her,
but she was a strong woman and took care of me, often working long
hours at her nursing job to make ends meet. I think it helped that
my Uncle John was there for us. He helped her financially even though
he probably did it out of guilt. He had always been more stable and
more successful than my father, his older brother. I suppose that
created jealousy. When my father left, Uncle John stepped in happily.
My uncle was the best. He took care of us and I will always remember
his kindness. I guess he wanted to feel needed
by someone and my mom and I fit the bill. I loved my uncle and never
thought he took advantage of me, though he was the first man I ever
slept with. You think I was taken advantage of, huh? But I wasn't.
I was a hot, horny 15-year-old when he jacked me off. He wouldn't even
let me touch him until I was seventeen. I guess I wanted a daddy in
my life, and he certainly filled that need in me for years. It was just
that one time that I wanted more from him and he gave it to me.
You think he started it? Well, think again because he didn't . . .I
did. I had kissed girls and almost had sex with one, but was caught by
her father. I told my uncle all about what happened and he laughed.
Then he saw that I was still hard underneath my jeans and he calmly
opened them, took my hard cock in his hand and proceeded to jack me
off. He didn't say a word afterwards - just licked my cum off his hand
and then left me with my jeans still open and my limp dick sticking out
of my underwear.
He avoided me for a while. I was hurt, but then I noticed boys and
forgot about him - until a couple of years later. I came home one night
with a black eye and a busted lip. I had gone down on the wrong guy. I
guess I had a reputation, then, of being available to suck off jocks
after their showers. I was a typical teenager and thought nothing would
go wrong. He was a football player and didn't take kindly to a fag
sucking him off, though he seemed to enjoy it at the time.
I was glad my uncle was there to take care of me
because I knew my mother would have been pissed off and would
have grounded me. I only had a few more weeks left of school and
then I would be graduating. I wanted my mother to think of me as
her perfect son, so my uncle helped me hide the bruise and the split
lip. He took me to his house for a few days and my mom didn't think
anything of it. She was glad to have me out of the house while she
worked long hours at work. I'm sure if she had known that my uncle had
touched me, she would have refused, but I certainly never said a thing
and I
knew my uncle wouldn't.
I learned that weekend that my uncle was a fag. His bedroom was a
shrine of seduction. He had a few paintings on his wall that were
rather homoerotic. There were pictures of nude men all over and a huge
male symbol beside his tiger-striped bed. If he weren't my uncle, I
would have laughed. My mom must have known that he was gay and didn't
care or she just pretended he wasn't. She certainly never knew I was
into men until I was twenty-one and brought a man home to Thanksgiving
dinner. She wasn't overly upset, but she mourned the
fact that she would never be a grandmother. I told her I could still
have
a child, but she didn't think I was the type. I wasn’t upset she
thought gay people don’t have children. I was a slut back then and had
sex with countless men. If my mom was unable to think outside her small
box, I wasn’t about to change her.
Does this mean my uncle influenced me? Would I have been a happy
heterosexual if he hadn't touched me when I was a teenager? Maybe. If
he had only touched me that once, I might have eventually gone back to
women, but when he fucked me the first time, in his bed two years
later, I knew I never would look at a girl again. I doubt it made any
difference, though, because I had a crush on one of
my male teachers years before Uncle John jerked me off. Even back then,
I knew I was attracted to both boys and girls.
When my uncle took care of me, I was the one who
touched him first. I rubbed his cock in his pants while he was
doctoring my lip. He laughed and moved away and said, "Later."
If he hadn't been so gentle with me, I would never have been interested
in anal sex. But afterwards, all I wanted
was to have the same experience I had with him. I never quite found
it. For a long time, I fucked older men. Some were gentle and some
were rough but none made me feel as well loved as Uncle John. I had
moved
out of my mother's house and was living in a cheap apartment in town.
The shitty jobs I had just kept me living there by a thread, but I was
young and wanted to feel independent. Since I didn't have a car, it was
easy to walk down to a bar and find a quick fuck for the night.
My first job was working at the local supermarket but I got bored with
that fast. At night, I usually went to a local bar, Sam's, that wasn’t
very far from where I lived and tried to find a daddy as my uncle
suggested. Older men fucked me but none of them turned
out to be the daddy I was looking for. Looks didn’t matter. It was all
about finding what I had with my uncle, so at first I wasn’t very
discriminating. Good thing I had a nurse for a mother. She had me
taking a condom to
school before I was even sexually active. Other boys looked up to me,
but I thought it was stupid. I was slutty when I was older but I wasn't
getting laid when I was thirteen.
One evening, a few years after working odd jobs and going through many
lovers, I did meet one man. His name was Melvin Frohike and he owned a
men's fashion store not far from the bar. He was a little on the short
side and wasn’t the best thing to look at, but I never was one for
looks, only how well a man fucked. He insisted that he was there just
for a drink. He told me he needed an assistant at the store. To show my
appreciation, I gave him a blowjob in the backroom. Afterwards, he told
me to meet him at his store the next morning and he would show me the
ropes.
After breakfast, I called the supermarket to tell them I was quitting.
Then I went to Melvin's Fashions, where I found Melvin opening up the
store. He looked surprised to see me there.
"Good to see you again, Alex. Wasn’t sure if you'd show."
"I'm here, Mr. Frohike."
"Please, call me Mel."
Mel and I got along well. He taught me everything I needed to know
about men's fashions and I learned how to give good head. He was
married with kids and said his wife never went down
on him. I was very willing to oblige him. I learned that going down
on certain customers also helped boost sales. Mel thought I was a
godsend.
A day like any other started with the daily routine of Mel opening up,
me getting the register started, and then going into the boss's office
to go down on him for that day. After I rose, licking my lips, he said,
"An important man is coming by today to
pick up his altered suits. He's a good friend of mine. Treat him well."
I nodded. Usually that meant if the customer wanted anything not on the
racks, I was to oblige him. Rarely did that mean anything other than a
blowjob. I assumed he meant this older man that came in later that day.
But the guy was bored and left quickly after buying a suit for his
son's bar mitzvah. Instead, I did a double take when a beautiful, young
man walked in. He was about my height and was leaner than I was. He had
to be only a few years older than me. One look at his sexy, hazel eyes
and his Armani suit and I wanted to have him for lunch and dinner.
"Hi. You must be Alex. Mel told me he had a new assistant. My suits
should be ready…."
I stared for a moment, daydreaming of sucking on
that full bottom lip, when he said, "Mulder - should be under the
name Mulder."
Apparently he was in a hurry. "Of course, Mr. Mulder." I turned and
grabbed the three suits under the name Mulder and
brought them around the counter for him.
"Would you like me to take them to your place, Mr. Mulder?" I licked my
lips suggestively.
He watched my tongue and he flushed. I smiled at
him. What I wouldn't do to have that man's cock down my throat.
"Just call me Mulder. I brought my car, Alex. Let me take you."
My smile widened at the suggestion. I was saving
up to buy me some wheels. This Mulder could take me for a ride
all he wanted. I opened the door for him but he grabbed it and let
me walk through with his suits. I didn’t even bother to look if Mel
had taken over for me. I couldn’t get past those amazing eyes. I felt
them on me and was so hot for him; he could have taken me over the hood
of his car.
It was a warm, sunny May and I took my sunglasses from my shirt pocket
and put them on.
"You look sexy with those on, Alex."
I grinned. Oh yeah, I was gonna get fucked. He opened the back door so
I could lay the suits down over the back seat. I was sure he was
checking me out as I bent down to straighten them out. I was so glad I
wore my tight, button fly jeans - the ones that left nothing to the
imagination.
The guy had a cell phone. He had to be a business executive. The only
guys I knew that had them were into drugs. If
he wanted to set me up in an expensive apartment so I could be his
boy toy, I certainly wouldn’t object. He didn’t look like he would
have a hard time finding anyone to warm his bed for him, though. I
guess I would still have to look for that daddy Uncle John told me
about.
I was surprised at the apartment complex he drove into. It seemed far
below his standards. He saw me looking curiously but didn’t say
anything.
"Come on," was all he said. I got the suits out of the back seat and
wondered if I would get fucked after all. Maybe he was just starting
out and hadn’t the money yet to move into
better housing. I didn’t let it bother me as we rode up the elevator
to his floor. He seemed distant suddenly. I didn’t like this at all.
He opened the door to his apartment and let me in. His place was a
little cramped but it was bigger than mine. My little efficiency
apartment was cheap and suited my needs, which were minimal. No one
would try to steal anything from my apartment because there was nothing
to steal. All the money I saved on rent
and furniture was being saved for a car. Maybe Mulder was saving up for
a house.
He pointed to a closet when his cell phone rang.
I put the suits in the closet and waited for him to get off the
phone.
"I will take care of it tomorrow, Scully." A pause then, "No, I'll see
you tomorrow." Another pause. "Don’t worry
about it. I'll deal with Skinner tomorrow." Another pause. "All
right. Bye." He hung up the cell phone and looked upset. Then he
looked at me. Before I could take a breath, he had me backed up against
the closet door
and he was sucking my breath away.
I was hard pressed to object to anything. With the feel of his body
hard against mine, his trapped cock hot against my hip and the bulge in
my pants nestled alongside his, I was having a hard time remembering my
name.
I quickly unzipped him, wanting to see and feel his cock. When I pulled
that bad boy out, I couldn’t help it; I had that long cock in my mouth
and was sucking and lapping it like a snow cone. He had to be at least
nine inches. I could only think of what it would feel like stretching
and fucking me.
I did my best to keep him from coming too quickly; using every trick
I'd picked up over the years of sucking cock. When he finally came, I
was so hard, I knew I wouldn’t last. Then
that amazing mouth opened up to take me in, I almost came all over that
beautiful face. He gripped my balls, seeing how imminent I was. He used
a few tricks on me, but I was too hot and ready to go. In no time I
gasped
and came down his throat.
He kissed me then we lay for a moment in each other's arms. I napped
while he went to take a shower.
While Mulder was in the shower, I took the liberty of looking around
his apartment. I saw some videos on the TV stand and smiled at the
names. I had seen a few of those porn videos myself. His cell phone
rang so I picked it up and answered it awkwardly, never having used one
before.
"Hello?"
"Mulder?"
"Sorry. He's in the shower. He won't be long. Who's this?"
"I was about to ask you the same thing. I'm his boss, Assistant
Director Walter Skinner. Please have him call me back. He knows my
number."
"Will do."
There was a click and a dial tone. I shrugged and closed the phone. I
sat down on the couch and found his wallet in
his coat pocket where I'd grabbed the phone. Inside was an ID that
showed him as an agent of the FBI. I was surprised. I'd never fucked
a federal agent before… as far as I knew.
Mulder padded out of the bathroom, a towel wrapped around his hips. He
looked sexy as hell.
"Oh, sorry. Your cell phone rang earlier. It was
your boss…Walter Skinner? He asked me to have you call him back."
He didn’t look very happy but said, "Thanks, Alex."
I handed him the cell phone, then I returned his
wallet to his jacket. Mulder was too distracted to notice.
"Sir, you called me…."
He sounded like a little boy caught with his hand in a cookie jar. I
smiled. Mulder looked so young and innocent when speaking to his boss.
"Yes, sir. We'll be on it first thing in the morning." There was a
pause, then he hung up. "Shit."
"Your boss is a tyrant?"
"Sort of. He keeps his agents on their toes. Doesn’t like my reports.
Says they’re sloppy for an Oxford graduate."
"You went to Oxford?"
"Yeah. I received a Rhodes scholarship in my senior year in high
school. I was very glad to get out from under my parents."
"At least you had two parents. My father left me and my mom when I was
twelve."
"Sorry to hear about that. My parents had some excuse. My sister was
kidnapped. They were never the same after she disappeared."
"Oh, damn. I'm sorry."
"No need to apologize. She was grabbed by a serial murderer. It's the
reason I work for the FBI. They headhunted
me right out of Oxford because of how well I profiled criminal
investigations."
I sighed heavily. "Wish I had the discipline to go to college. I did OK
in school, but it bored me mostly."
"You seem smart enough, Alex. You should try taking a college entrance
exam. I'm sure you'd pass."
"Thanks, Mulder, but I think I'll stick to clothes and sucking cock."
He moved between my legs and looked down into my
eyes. "You’re one sexy motherfucker, you know that?"
I grinned and let him pull me up into his arms. He kissed me and I ran
one hand down his chest to the knot of towel at his waist. The other
hand teased a nipple while my tongue was
playing with his. He wanted me to fuck him and I was very willing,
ready, and able. Good thing all I had on was my Fruit of the Looms.
Mulder was good for me. It became a regular thing, so I rarely went to
the bars anymore. Either he'd call me up at
the store or would pick me up at my apartment. I found out more about
Mulder and my boss when Mel came to visit Mulder while I was over.
Mulder
had just enough time to slip out of me before Mel opened the door.
"Mulder, you should lock the door when you're fucking. Never know who's
gonna show up." Mel's eyes looked hungry. I wouldn’t have minded if he
joined us.
"And to what do we owe the honor?" asked Mulder,
pretending as if it was perfectly natural to find him fucking a
man in his living room.
"Sorry to intrude, Mulder, but Langly has some new information on that,
uh…." Mel looked at me askance, not certain if he should include me in
their relationship.
I quickly pulled up my pants and said, "Don’t mind me." I was about to
go to the bathroom and wait on them to finish with their talk, but
Mulder shrugged.
"Go ahead and tell me, Mel. I trust Alex…as much as you do."
"Alex is an innocent in this. Are you sure you want to involve him?"
"I don’t see why not. He's very obedient and listens very well. Don’t
you?" Mulder looked at me and smiled.
"Absolutely," I acknowledged, wanting desperately to know what these
two were doing on their off hours together. Images of them in a porno
ring flitted through my mind.
Mulder pulled me to him and kissed me while one of my hands was still
holding up my pants. I would have done anything he asked me to in that
moment, short of murder.
"All right…Langly found out that Matthews regularly visits someone in
Colorado - every other month, practically."
"Doesn’t he have a mother living there?"
"Yes, he visits her. But from what Langly has learned, unless his
mother happens to be a buxom blond of about twenty
six, I don’t think he takes his mother to restaurants or dancing."
"Maybe a maid of his mother's? She is well off."
"Could be, but it seems a bit unusual for a senator to bring national
business to his mother's."
"He brings his work to an unsecured location? Hm, a security breach may
be an interesting angle. It would certainly be far more informative
than Senator Matthews fucking his mother's maid."
My mind boggled for a bit. I knew Mulder was a federal agent, but I had
no idea that Mel was involved in anything but
formal men's apparel. I kept my mouth shut, not knowing what I
could say and for fear of looking like a complete idiot. I was getting
turned on, though, by watching Mulder in action. He was the sexiest
man I'd ever been with and the air of authority was definitely an
added bonus
Mulder smiled at me, probably noticing the way I
was looking at him.
"I think we can work on this later, Mulder."
I looked at Mel and smiled. I would have no problems fucking two men at
once, certainly not these two men who had become the only friends I had
in the world. Gay men don’t have friends
only fuck buddies.
OK, I'm willing to concede some do have friends,
but then, I usually fuck mine.
"You want to be double teamed, Alex?" Mulder asked. I guess I was
obvious.
I kissed Mulder then moved back to where I was before Mel interrupted.
My ass was high in the air over the couch and I motioned for Mel to
move closer. I had Mel's cock in my mouth and Mulder's in my ass in no
time. Sheer bliss. Like I have said before, I was a slut back then and
would've been happy for any two, really. These two just happened to be
my friends.
*****
Mulder and Mel rarely used me for assignments. They claimed I would be
too easily distracting if I were to try to gain information for them in
certain situations.
A few weeks after having given me a key to his apartment, Mulder came
home with a suit wrapped in plastic. I still kept my own apartment; I
just rarely used it. If I wanted to get fucked regularly, without
needing Mulder to take me home afterwards, it was inconvenient.
"What's that?"
"A suit just for you. Mel ordered it. I want you
to look pretty when I take you to dinner tonight. You will attract a
lot of attention and that's exactly what's needed so I can gain access
to Senator Mosby's office."
I've never thought I was all that good-looking, certainly not as sexy
as Mulder nor as charismatic as Melvin. I was just an average guy whose
idea of working out was getting fucked on a regular basis by his
boyfriend. Mulder had tried to get me to go with him on his runs or to
a gym. I ended up flirting with others instead of actually doing
anything. Mulder gave up eventually, realizing I didn't require a lot
of activity to keep me fit. He claimed I was still growing. I know he
was referring to my maturity level but I couldn’t help but think
of the one place I wouldn’t have minded growing was still two inches
shorter than Mulder's nine inches.
"Mulder, you shouldn't have bought me a suit!"
"I didn't. Mel did. He said this was a gift for all the loyal, hard
work you do at the shop."
I thought of all the blowjobs I'd given to his clients over the years.
I shrugged and opened the plastic to take a closer look. It was all
black with a white dress shirt, no tie.
"I hate suits," I sighed.
Mulder snickered. "Why are you working in a men's clothing store?"
Normally, I would have said the access to dick, but lately Mulder was
acting kind of possessive of me so I said, "The money."
Mulder snorted. "You'd make more as a male stripper."
"But then I'd have to leave town. I don't want to be away from you."
I'd noticed that Mulder became very affectionate when I said mushy shit
like that.
Mulder pulled me to him and kissed me thoroughly. When he broke away to
give us both breathing room, he smiled and said, "You ol' softy."
I smiled back and was about to pull out his cock
to play with, when he shook his head. "Not now, baby. I need to
concentrate. Take a shower and put on that sexy cologne I love
on you."
I automatically went to shower without pause. I loved it when Mulder
was dominant. Maybe I was a bit of a doormat at the time, but I would
have done anything for him. I didn’t think I was in love with him, but
I know I would never had admitted it if I
were.
I walked out of the bathroom totally nude with the cologne on strategic
parts of my body. Mulder whistled and pulled me on his lap to kiss me.
His hands squeezed my ass as his tongue played with mine. I could have
easily pushed Mulder down and fucked him senseless, but I preferred to
take the submissive role with him. The fact he had an important job to
do every day and told me he shouldn’t have problems with sitting down,
helped me make that decision. On special occasions, though, he wanted
me to take over and I could get very rough with him. I did weigh close
to twenty pounds more than he, but he was
the one professionally trained.
He ran his fingers over my asshole a few times, causing shivers to run
up and down my spine, but he patted my ass and said, "Go put on the
silk boxers I gave you and an undershirt. I wanna see how you look in
the suit."
I grabbed the suit and went into the bedroom to slip on the boxers and
an undershirt. I sighed as I pulled the suit
on. I hated suits; they made me hot, sweaty and itchy. When I pulled on
the pants, I was surprised how comfortable the cloth was on me. It was
rather thin, so maybe I wouldn’t sweat much in it. I walked out,
wondering what I would wear as a tie. I would have to wear one of
Mulder's since I didn’t own any.
Mulder whistled. "Oh yeah, baby. You'll draw everyone's eye there. Men
and women will want you."
I snorted, not believing it for one minute. I was certain he said it
just to make me feel confident about myself when
we were at the senator's mansion. I was a bit nervous about it.
Though my mother had made good money and my uncle had helped her
maintain the lifestyle she was used to with her husband, I wasn't used
to a wealthy environment. Though I had no problem with helping those
well off where I worked, I knew if they had ever offered to take me to
their home, I would have been uncomfortable. I was certain I'd be
gaping at the opulence of the place.
"Don’t worry your pretty head about any of this,
baby. Fro and I will have the hard part of stealing those documents
from his safe in his bedroom."
I let Mulder hold me. I loved it when he became
so protective of me. God, I had it so bad. I can't believe I didn’t
recognize it for what it was.
"Come on. I have the very thing for you to wear." He led me to the
bedroom and opened up a box. He buttoned the top button of my dress
shirt and pinned the item right in the middle.
"There, you won't need a tie with that in place."
I went over to the dresser's mirror and stared at myself. There was a
little fox head pendant pinned there. It had lovely green eyes.
"It looks beautiful on you, baby. Matches your sexy green eyes."
I smiled. The fact it was a fox meant my lover was trying to mark me as
his. That completely thrilled me in such a
way that I became uncomfortable. I wasn’t really sure if I really
wanted my lover to be so possessive of me.
"Let's go, Alex. I'm eager to show you off."
I smiled again at him then let him lead me out the door. His hand
cupped my ass possessively when we were waiting
for the elevator. He kissed me once just before the elevator pinged
its arrival.
When we arrived, people were staring at us and for some reason that
sent a thrill through me. I loved the fact that we looked good together
and people couldn’t keep their eyes off
us. Mulder was greeted by quite a few people and I could tell they
were sizing me up as his boy toy, which is odd. I know I'm not *that*
much younger than he is. I guess it's just my looks. Oh well. Can't
be helped.
He kept a possessive hand on my back, near my waist, whenever a man or
woman seemed to get too close to me. I loved
that. After the many greetings and the schmoozing he did, we weren't
as bombarded by others and were left alone to drink a little. He
whispered in my ear at some point, "Now's the time, babe. I should
be back shortly. Just tell anyone who asks that I went to the john." He
kissed my ear softly before leaving me.
I looked into the sea of beautifully dressed people I didn't know and
was not really interested in getting to know…except maybe a few of the
men. All seemed to be with women, except one. He was standing with his
back to me. He was balding and he had very broad shoulders. I could
tell there was power hidden underneath that Hugo Boss jacket. He was
fingering a ring on his hand. I wanted to
go up and ask him about it when my musings were rudely interrupted.
"Hi, there, sexy. I've never seen you with Mulder before." A beautiful
platinum blond haired young woman was standing very close to me. Any
closer and she'd have worn my jacket. She had a voice that stroked my
libido. I was surprised, since I hadn't been attracted to girls since I
was in school. This wasn’t a girl, though. She was all woman.
"Hi. Mulder lets me out once in awhile." I gave her the smile I knew
made Mulder moan with desire when I directed it at him.
She put her hand on my ass and moved even closer
to whisper in my ear, "Wanna have some fun?"
Damn. I couldn't believe I was actually hard for a woman. That was the
first. Her whole body spoke of danger and sin. I glanced into her
clear, blue eyes and half moaned, "What's your name?"
"Marita." She took my hand and led me away from everyone.
Can you believe it? I fucked a woman for the first time, cheating on
the man I wanted above all others, I thought
at the time. It was primal, too - harder than I'd ever fucked Mulder. I
think it was the whole scenario. Fucking where we could be caught
by anyone, in a storage closet just off the main room. She howled loud
enough, too, as I thrust in her hard and fast. Her cherry red lips
tasted
so good, her body felt so amazing, and every sound from her just added
to my desire for her. Her pussy parted so easily for my dick, no need
for preparation at all. I think I understood why some men prefer women
right then.
What happened afterwards, though, changed everything. Mulder wasn’t
upset. In fact, he was happy. Everyone was so focused on hearing the
sounds of Marita being fucked by me, that no one noticed that Mulder
was gone longer than he should have been. He said that when he
returned, everyone gave him a pitying look, sad for the
man whose date had so publicly humiliated him.
I didn’t see it that way. I was devastated at what I'd done and I was
upset when he wasn’t the least bit angry. After Marita and I cleaned up
as best we could, she returned to the main room first. I followed her,
reluctantly, a few minutes later. Mulder grabbed me by the arm and
hauled me away. I was so shame-faced; I thought for sure he would hit
me in front of everyone. Instead, he pulled me out of the estate and
into his car. He looked so pissed that when he
tore out of the senator's place, I thought for sure he would yell at
me when we were far enough away. Instead, he busted out laughing.
"Damn, Alex, you were brilliant! I'm so glad I never knew you'd do
that, because the surprise was all that more delightful!"
I was confused and a bit hurt, though Mulder was
acting like I had no reason to be.
"What?"
"God, Alex, I could fall in love with you right now for being so
selfless as to fuck the Slut of D.C. for me."
I flushed hotly, not believing the words he was saying. They didn’t
make sense to me.
"Mulder, that wasn’t planned…I-I'm sorry. I've never been attracted to
a woman before. She was just so hot and…."
"No need to apologize, baby. You did the best thing for me. You
distracted everyone away from me."
I shut up, stunned. I sat in the passenger seat,
the safety belt strapping me down. I felt trapped suddenly. What
was awful was I could still smell her on me and my dick was hurting.
That woman, if she was the Slut of D.C., had a tight pussy.
Mulder respected my need for quiet. When we arrived back at his
apartment, I rushed into the bathroom, hanging the
suit up on the towel rack carefully, and showered. I nearly rubbed
myself raw getting the smell of her off me.
When I left the bathroom, I dressed quickly in jeans and a t-shirt,
feeling so much better that way. "I think I should stay in my apartment
tonight."
"Wonderful idea, baby. You'd make a great double
agent-keeping up appearances…" He trailed off when he saw the
look on my face. "You're serious." It was a statement.
"Yeah. I think it may be best if we cooled off for a while."
"Damn, Alex. You sound like a woman's magazine!"
I snorted. "Well, in this case, that is the most
appropriate thing for this situation we're in."
"I don’t want you to leave."
Those words stopped me - not for the actual words, but the way he said
them. When he pouted, I always went weak in the knees. I turned to him,
looking into his beautiful, hazel eyes.
"Alex, please don't go...I love you."
It was the pause that got me. I knew he was speaking truthfully to me,
but I had to ask. "Do you mean it?"
"Yes, Alex. I don't want to live without you. Please stay."
I sighed. "I wasn't leaving for good, Mulder. Just a few days to clear
my head."
He moved closer to me. "Do you really need to leave?"
I hesitated, then nodded. "I think it would do both of
us good to be alone for a few days."
He hung his head, but then said softly, "OK, baby. If
you think it's best."
I moved to him, lifted his head, kissed that pouting bottom lip, then
looked in his eyes. "I love you too, Mulder. Just a few days, I
promise."
He let me leave and didn't hound me while I was at my apartment. I
think he knew it was a test, and I admit that it was. Mulder is very
savvy. It wasn't what attracted me to him at first but it's what kept
me with him so long. He would talk to me about unusual things, stuff I
normally wouldn't pay much attention to, and I'd be enthralled. If
he was ever interested, I think he'd make a wonderful professor. We
sometimes played student and professor, acting out my fantasy. His was
me in a
dress, pretending to be a virgin girl and he was the lusty, older man
bent on corrupting me. It always made me laugh but I never did when he
was present.
When I returned later the next week, we practically tore our clothes
off each other. We were so hot for each other that we didn't speak that
entire night. It's kind of hard to speak when
we either had each other's tongues or cocks in our mouths. I
think the fact I cheated on him with Marita was a precursor to what
happened later. As far as I know, he never cheated on me. He may have.
I know he's a horn dog and sexy as hell. I'm sure he could have
practically anyone he wanted. Luckily, I'm not the jealous type, though
he is when I'm around another man except Mel. He hates to watch me
work, knowing that I sometimes give a few of the customers head. He'd
asked me before if I was interested in working another job, but I
wasn't.
When I finally saved up enough to buy the car of my dreams, he helped
me out because I'd never bought one before. In no time, he was having
me pick him up for work sometimes, showing me off to a few of his
coworkers. I finally met Dana Scully, his partner, that way. She was a
beautiful, petite red head.
I was certain he lusted after her, but he told me she was more of a
sister than anything. She told me, herself, she would never be with
someone who was dating another. I believed her.
It was during one of these pickups that I finally saw him - the balding
man I'd seen at the senator's house. He was even sexier when I saw him
face
forward. I nearly sprained my cock and had to adjust myself quickly as
he stopped Mulder and talked to him before he made it to my car. I
didn't hear what they said because my mind was on how sexy
he was - hell, how sexy they both were. And then I worried for the
first
time. Mulder may not have been getting anything from his partner, but
I could tell he wouldn't mind having some of that gorgeous hunk of man.
When the balding man turned away, Mulder looked a bit upset, but smiled
at me and got in.
"Who was that?"
"Oh, uh, that was my boss, Assistant Director Walter Skinner."
I whistled. "I wouldn't mind having him as my boss!" I grinned.
He didn't look happy. "I don't think you would. He's a
hard ass. I think he eats metal shards for breakfast and shits out
nails at night."
"Did you get in trouble?"
"Not really. He just doesn't like me sticking my nose where it doesn't
belong."
"You can stick your nose anywhere you want with me, baby," I teased him.
He smiled, losing some of the shadows in his eyes.
I didn't even think about Walter Skinner again until a
few weeks later, Mulder was walking and talking with the older man
as they made their way to my car. I noticed that Skinner was attracted
to Mulder. I'd seen men and women look at Mulder, but this was the
first
time I also saw mutual admiration and respect pointed in my lover's
direction. For the first time, I was jealous as hell, but I wasn't sure
who I was more jealous over.
I got out of my car to meet the man who intimidated
my lover. My stance was belligerent and jealous, but I couldn't help it.
"Alex, this is Walter Skinner, my boss. Sir, this is Alex, my
boyfriend."
The tone of Mulder's was so confident and proud that my heart hurt. I
felt like a shit for being jealous of them. I immediately changed my
stance and greeted him cordially.
"Nice to meet you, sir."
The look in his eyes told me that he liked what he saw.
"Nice to meet you too, Alex. Mulder has told me a little about you.
Work over at Mel's?"
I nodded, knowing it wasn't the most respectable job, but I liked it.
"Mulder told me that Mel has said that he's never been
robbed while you've been working for him. He said you look too much
like a bodyguard and frighten off potential criminals."
My eyes widened. I never knew that. Mel did say he hadn't been robbed
since I joined, but I never thought it was because of me. "I didn't
know I was frightening."
Mulder smiled. "You're not really, Alex. It's just your height and
presence. You look like you could hold your own in a fight."
"I've never fought in my life!"
"I know, but others don't. Skinner suggested that he teach you some
moves, though, if you're interested. He boxes down at the gym not far
from the Hoover. It wouldn't be a problem at all for us
to go there sometimes when he's free. Are you interested?"
I was put on the spot. I couldn't say no, not with them both looking at
me so eagerly. I nodded reluctantly and Walter grinned. God, he looked
even sexier, if that was possible. Suddenly it didn't seem such a bad
idea after all.
****
A week later
Mulder drove me to see Walter at his gym. I grinned at
how more possessive he'd become since he introduced me to his boss.
He even bought me a ring the other day.
"Does this mean I'm yours and only yours?" I'd asked him, curious.
"Definitely."
He made love to me for hours that night, making sure I
knew I was his. I realized he wanted me to quit my job with Mel.
He didn't like me with all the men I met at the clothing store.
At the gym, Walter looked handsome in gym shorts and t-shirt. He took
care of his body and it paid off. I hoped I wasn't too obvious checking
out his package.
When Mulder walked out of the locker room in his shorts, I couldn't
help but run my hands over his sexy legs. He blushed.
I loved that. He was embarrassed about me showing affection in front
of his boss.
"Thanks again, sir, for doing this for Alex."
"You're welcome, Mulder."
I smiled at Walter, knowing I had a glint in my eyes meant for him
alone. He didn't react to it, which was good, since Mulder was right
there. I never said I'd never lived dangerously before.
"I'll jog for a bit then come back, see how you're doing, OK?"
I kissed Mulder for reassurance, then turned back to Walter.
"I think the first thing is to get limbered up. It will help against
sore muscles and torn ligaments."
He handed me a rope that I realized was a jump rope. I
almost laughed, but didn't with the serious look on his face.
"Come on. It's not rocket science."
I sighed then began to jump rope. I felt like I was back in
kindergarten. I looked over through my lashes and saw how hot
Skinner looked, even doing this. Maybe I *didn't* look like a doofus.
Who knew jumping rope was sexy? New obsession- seeing buff, older
men sweaty and jumping up and down. Who could ask for more? I think I'd
stopped at some point and was staring.
"Ready for something different?" he asked, not breathless at all, the
bastard.
"Sure." I had to clear my throat before I could speak, though.
"Have you ever wrestled?"
I grinned. "Only in the bedroom."
He did a double take, then returned my grin.
"Not now, honey, I'm teaching you to exercise," he quipped.
God, any sexier and I'd have to throw him down on the mats and suck his
dick into my mouth.
"Maybe later."
His expression became serious and he changed the subject. He was
probably flustered and didn't know what to make of his subordinate's
lover flirting with him.
We did some limbering exercises. Then, finally, his hands were on me,
showing me a classic attack move and how to protect myself. I think I
knew how to protect myself from the occasional oddball that wouldn't
take no for an answer. Usually using dirty tricks I taught myself,
which had no finesse. I didn't mention this to Skinner and I'd never
told Mulder, but I've had to defend myself before. Yes, I was
a slut, but I took care of myself. I never said I was a doormat when
I cruised bars.
I loved Skinner's hands on me. If I weren't careful, though, I knew I'd
show more than me flirting with him. Like how hard I was for him after
he knocked me on my ass. I do believe the sweats were lose enough and
hid my attraction to him well enough. He certainly had no problems
repeating the same again and again in the next few weeks.
Mulder seemed happy that I was spending time with his boss. I do know,
though, the reason he took me home every time afterwards and fucked my
brains out was because he was jealous at the same time. I knew Mulder
was attracted to him, but I realized it was deeper than that. It didn't
bother me until one day, out of the blue; he wouldn't let me go to the
gym.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
I knew better than that. "Bull. What's going on? Were
you pissed because he didn't sign off on a case?"
Mulder sighed. "Look, you've been spending a lot of time with him. I
just want you for myself right now. I know it's selfish of me, but I'm
your boyfriend."
I smiled and kissed him thickly. "Yes, you are. If you prefer I stay
home and wrestle you in our bed than in the gym with your boss, then by
all means." I let him take all his frustration
and anxiety out on me, then I pinned him to the mattress and did the
same to him. We were both very sore the next day, but he had to sit
at a desk all day; I didn't. He and his partner had just returned from
a trip out of town and were catching up on all their paperwork. I was
a good boy the entire time he was away. Lustful thoughts about his boss
were only played out at home with my right hand and a dildo.
I think it was shortly after this that I seriously thought about what
to do to seduce Walter Skinner. At first, I was very selfish, only
thinking about how I could do it where Mulder wouldn't know
and Walter wouldn't feel guilty. Then something changed. I realized
I wasn't jealous like Mulder became when my hands were on his boss's
body while we wrestled and sparred. I fantasized about what it would
be like to see them together. It wasn't long before my lusty thoughts
turned to me being the middle of a hot, Walter and Mulder sandwich.
It became a trial to figure out how I could get them both in a
situation where it would be easy and simple - painless and without
regret. It helped that Walter was having problems with his wife
and was in the middle of divorce proceedings. He would be ready for
just about anything to take his mind off his complicated life. Mulder,
though, I knew he would be ready to do it out of sheer lust. But how
to do it where I wasn't the instigator? I certainly didn't want him
to place the blame on me afterwards and make me the fall guy for it.
I wasn't stupid.
We were wonderful together. I know the only reason I ever devised such
a plan was sexual frustration on my part. Mulder didn't mind me in a
three-way with Mel, but no way would he have liked if I brang home a
trick for it. That helped plant the seed in my mind. I
just had to invite the now wife-free man to our apartment more often.
Walter wasn't a stranger off the street; he was my lover's boss. I knew
Mulder had a crush on Walter; it was more than just
respect and admiration. I could see him ogling Walter's hard ass,
that nice bulge below his hard abs, and that chest that made you hunger
to run your face through the brush.
I didn't know if Walter was gay or bi or what. I did know that he had
no problems with Mulder being with me and he was very
happy about joining us when I invited him over for dinner. I planned
the perfect evening. Dinner and then a movie afterwards. Of course, I
decided to use subterfuge in my plan of wooing them into a threesome. I
wore very tight, worn pants that had a strategic hole near my ass
and a muscle shirt. I had buffed up a bit since 'exercising' with
Skinner.
To me, it wasn't exercise as much as getting a boner that wouldn't quit
until my lover eased the tension when we got home.
The best plan I had, in my mind, was, in fact, the cheesiest move. Men
are always thinking this shit works with women, but I
happen to know that this move DEFINITELY works with men. I substituted
the film we were to watch with a key scene in a hot threesome porn
video. It was a classic. I know Mulder and I loved that scene a lot. If
I weren't successful in my scheme, I would have to buy a new copy soon
because it was nearly worn out. It showed a man similarly built to
myself,
on his hands and knees, his ass spread wide by the large man who was
rimming him while another was thrusting his dick down the middle man's
throat.
I know - cheese city, but it worked like a charm. The dinner went well.
Then we went to the living room and the big guy sat in
the front of the TV while Mulder and I set it up. When the tape
came on,
Mulder gasped out loud.
"Alex! How did that get in there? I thought it was set
up for 'The Minority Report.'"
"Oh, sorry. I don't know how that got in there!"
I stood up and turned off the tape after Skinner had certainly gotten
an eye and earful of hot gay sex. Skinner was
flustered, hot, and bothered by it, I could tell. I was about to put in the
real movie
when Mulder pulled me out of the living room for a moment.
"What the hell was that about?"
"Huh?"
"Don't play innocent with me, Mister. I know you planned this for a
reason!"
I blushed furiously, but it didn't do any good. Mulder
was just too fucking smart. It's why I love him.
"OK, you got me. I just wanted to see if Skinner was curious."
"Alex! That's my boss out there! Did you have to be so
crude in your methods?"
I snorted. "I know for a fact you want to know as much
as I do!"
His eyes grew wide and, after a moment, he laughed softly. "Actually,
you're right. I do wanna know if Skinner's interested."
"Then come on. Let's get back in there!"
We returned to the living room and I was about to put in that tape when
Skinner said, "That's OK. You don't have to put the tape in, Alex."
I turned towards him, my ass whipping around so fast, it nearly made me
dizzy.
I was feeling more confident than I had before I was working out and
felt better about myself. Mulder told me he could tell a
difference in our lovemaking. I was more energetic and enthusiastic,
he said. Well, I do know exercising didn't lessen my libido. If
anything,
I was much more aware of men and- this upset me-women, now that I'd
been with Marita.
Do you think I'm excusing my behavior that night? I guess I am. Though,
I certainly have no regrets about it.
Skinner was hesitant but very enthusiastic once he said he had a better
idea for us. I smiled encouragingly at him. Mulder seemed too surprised
at Skinner's desire to change the intended entertainment for the
evening. He hadn't moved at all, but stood watching us.
Skinner looked over at Mulder. I realize, now, he was seeing if it was
OK before grabbing me and pulling me into
his lap. My legs were splayed on either side of the big man's hips
as he pulled me close to him to grab a kiss. Skinner tasted like the
steak I had served him for dinner. It didn't mask his own unique f,
though.
Mulder finally moved toward us and grabbed his own kiss from
me. I moaned in Mulder's mouth as one of Skinner's hands grasped my
ass. Our cloth-covered bulges were pressed together and I loved it.
It wasn't as if I'd never been with two men before, but being with
these two men was different than my previous experiences. Though I'd
been with Mel and Mulder before, I'd actually never kissed Mel. My boss
had only received blowjobs from me. I could tell, with Skinner, it
would be vastly different. Skinner pulled my shirt from my belted
waistband. Soon, his large hands were running up and down my back as if
mapping me out.
Mulder took advantage of Skinner's distraction to grab his face and
pull it to him. Watching them kiss was thrilling. I'd found a new
addiction. My cock let me know it wanted out of my too tight jeans and
I squirmed. Skinner shifted his hands from me and let me rise from his
lap. I opened up my belt and button fly and he reached into my opened
jeans to pull my cock free from its trappings. I moaned with the feel
of that strong, calloused hand grasping me so intimately.
Mulder pulled off my pants while Skinner continued to explore with his
hand, jerking me off exquisitely. All thoughts of uncertainty about him
fled. I now wondered if Mulder had been with Skinner before. It
wouldn't have changed anything, but I was curious.
Mulder rose behind me after my pants and BVDs were completely removed.
He sucked on my left earlobe while Skinner ran his free hand up my
shirt. I wondered if I wasn't the only one who'd made plans for the
evening.
Skinner took his hands away from me to pull my shirt up and off.
There I was, totally nude in front of two dressed men. Both were the
sexiest men I'd ever met in my life and I would do anything for
them.
Mulder was playing with my ass while Skinner moved close to me, taking
my mouth in a very possessive kiss. When he allowed me to breathe
again, I was dizzy. The man could kiss!
Mulder kissed down my back, breathing on the wet patches of skin from
his kisses and tongue swipes. I purred when Skinner's mouth trailed
down my neck, finding the sensitive spots along the way until he nipped
at my nipples. I howled and the bastard grinned at my reaction.
I grabbed the back of his neck and kissed him, nipping his lips,
showing him how it felt. He growled in his throat and fucked my mouth
with his tongue.
I couldn't believe my luck. I was sandwiched between these two hot men
just like my fantasies. I was afraid to over-analyze, fearing it would
all disappear. When Mulder's tongue slid down the crack of my ass, it
completely blocked out all my worries and doubts.
I rucked up Skinner's shirt, wanting to tease his nipples as
he had mine. I pinched one while I bit and sucked on the other. His
hands were cupping my head, fingers messaging my scalp. Apparently he
liked it from the curious rumble at the base of his throat. I realized
he sounded like a lion purring. How hotter could the mother fucker get?
I loved the patch of hair on his chest. I'm almost hairless in
comparison. Mulder has a nice little tuft of hair in the middle of
his pretty chest, but this was a delight. I ran my face then tongue
through the hairs, keeping that purr going. The rumble could be felt
on my tongue as I swiped through the bush.
Mulder rose behind me, I heard him opening his buckle then in a moment
his cock was kissing my asshole. I lifted my eyes briefly to catch
Mulder reach over and kiss his boss. I'm so glad I did, my cock pulsed
at the sight. If I watched them fuck, I think I would be one lucky SOB.
I imagined Skinner could have Mulder begging to be fucked easily.
Mulder thrust inside me and I gasped out, the puff of air blowing
through Skinner's hairs.
Looking into Skinner's lust-glazed eyes, I gasped out, "Wanna feel
you." I licked my lips, hoping he'd understand what I wanted. I helped
him open his belt and pants as best I could while Mulder's long cock
slid in and out of me.
Quicker than I thought possible, Skinner's thick cock was in
my mouth. I was bent in half to reach that gorgeous hunk of flesh as
Mulder's hands gripped my hips, keeping me upright. My legs were
trembling
with the combined thrusts in and out of me. They must have communicated
over my head because the next moment, they both slipped out of me. I
whimpered and tried standing but had to be held as they switched
positions.
They had to have planned it. At the time, though, I didn't have any
brain cells to figure that out. My dick was so hard it hurt and they
cruelly ignored it. Feeling Skinner's cock in me had me squirming and
Mulder's
dick is one of the wonders of the world. When I was impaled so
amazingly
by both men, I knew I was going to lose it, but they weren't touching
me
and I was desperate. I whimpered, making Mulder moan with the added
sensation but Skinner figured it out and reached down to grasp me. I
gasped, causing Mulder to thrust even deeper in my mouth. I
swallowed hard to keep from
choking and then I was coming. They must have moved me at some point
because
the next moment I remembered, I was laying on the sofa fully sated with
a
blanket over me.
My ass hurt, my throat hurt, and I was totally blissed out. I couldn't
see them. I rose from the sofa and went in search of them, wincing.
They were in Mulder's bed, tangled together. God, they looked so
beautiful. I was sorry I missed it. A fantasy flitted across my mind of
keeping them like this forever. The idea of cuffing them to the bed had
my palms itching.
Sighing quietly in defeat, I snuggled up behind Mulder and fell asleep.
Skinner and Mulder rose at some point. I lifted my head from the pillow
just in time to witness them kissing. My cock twitched at the sight.
Skinner's big hand gripped Mulder's ass possessively and I was hard as
a brick when I saw a finger slide down the crease of Mulder's ass.
"I gotta go," I heard Skinner murmur against Mulder's mouth.
"Yes, sir," Mulder teasingly replied. I bit back a laugh, not wanting
them to be aware I was awake.
"Thanks for the evening."
"Can't wait to do it again, Skinner."
"Walter...at least away from work."
Mulder nodded, and kissed Walter once more. God they looked so good
together it hurt. Then Walter walked out. Mulder turned to me and
smiled.
"Hey, sleepy head. Walter just left."
I nodded. "I saw you two. You looked so hot."
Mulder grinned. "Think you can stand some more?"
"Oh yeah!" I pulled back the blanket and Mulder bent to claim my
mouth with his.
****
In two weeks time, Walter introduced me to a man named Arlo Simmons,
the owner of a private security agency. Walter and he had been friends
since 'Nam and he said with training, I would fit perfectly into his
business.
"My boys are trained in more than just security but are required
to maintain a rigid regimen of exercise and diet. Do you think you have
the stuff to do this?"
I didn't but I told him, "Yes, sir."
The man smiled. "Very good. Be here at 8 on Friday. It will be a
three day weekend away from home. We shall see how well you do."
Shit, I wanted to cry on Walter's shoulder. Yes, I'd gained muscle and
was fitter than I'd ever been in my life, but I wasn't certain if
I could handle this.
Walter patted my back when Simmons left. "Arlo talks a mean game, but
I'm sure it won't be that hard, Alex. You have what it takes. Don't
worry."
That made me feel better. I just hoped I could handle it. I desperately
wanted a better job, most especially if it helped Mulder and Walter
look at me with more respect.
Friday came sooner than I thought. Mulder had fucked me senseless the
night before, telling me how much he'd miss me. I don't know why I was
acting like a pussy, but for some reason the pit of my stomach ached. I
didn't want to leave my lover. He kissed me once more before I left.
****
The weekend went better than I thought. It was tough at first.
The drill sergeant, as I liked to call him, was hard as hell. I felt we
were being trained for boot camp. We continued from Friday morning
until Sunday evening working our asses off. There wasn't time for
anything. On Saturday after lunch, we had this mock wrestling session.
All went well until the jerk I was wrestling grabbed me in the same way
an asshole did at a bar when I was nineteen. I had his wrist twisted
around his back so fast and my knee at his neck; I thought I'd broken
his wrist. He was hollering and the instructor had to pull us aside.
Luckily, I had just pulled his muscles and the guy was sore, but they
didn't have me wrestle again that day.
I was so worried I had fucked up terribly, but they never said
anything. I was still uncertain the next day when all of us were
allowed to go
home. I fell, exhausted, into my lover's arms, who carried me to bed.
"A little rough on you, baby?"
I nodded and he smiled and kissed it better. He held me for the rest of
the night while I slept like someone in a coma.
*****
I woke the next day to Walter smiling down at me.
"Well, congratulations, Alex. Arlo was very impressed with you."
"What? I thought I fucked up."
"Not at all! Where'd you learn that move you did on your wrestling
partner?"
I blushed. "In a bar."
"You watched someone else do that?"
"Yeah, the bouncer did it to a creep who was making trouble one night.
He taught me the moves later that night in his bed." I grinned.
"I bet he did." Walter grinned back.
I rose from the bed, unashamedly erect and nude. I scratched my ass and
yawned. "Where's Mulder?"
"I assigned him to a case out of town. His partner picked him up
about thirty minutes ago."
"Oh." I licked my dry lips and wandered into the kitchen to grab
some OJ. Walter followed me.
"Well, I just wanted to tell you what Arlo said, Alex--"
I interrupted him. I knew he didn't come over just to tell
me.
He could've called. "Sure you don't want me to suck you off before you
go?"
He flushed. I thought he was so sexy. My tongue ached to feel his cock.
"Alex, I'm technically still on duty--"
"I need my protein, besides, I'd love to service my country in any way
I can."
Walter snorted as I kneeled down and unzipped his pants. He groaned
when I slid my hand in his zipper and pulled out his hard cock. I
licked the head for a second then swallowed him down. He cried out and
gripped my head with both his hands. I made sure to make it slow and
easy for him. He fucked my mouth good and I loved every bit of it. I
made it last, wanting to give him a reward for helping me get the job.
"Oh shit, fuck, Alex...damn!"
I used every trick I knew to keep him going.
"God, Alex...so good! Unhh!" He came and I sucked him clean.
He gasped heavily, holding on to my head to regain his strength.
I loved his hands on my head. It felt so right.
When he was ready, he moaned loudly in frustration. "I gotta go!
I'll be late for a meeting."
I rose and stood before him, my cock harder than before. He bit his lip
then pulled me to him and kissed me. I just thought it was a goodbye
kiss, but one hand grasped my leaking dick and was stroking me
expertly. I moaned into his mouth when I came all over the linoleum.
"You taste so good, Alex," he murmured against my mouth. He pulled away
and licked his palm clean then washed his hands in the sink.
Walter kissed me once more then left. I sighed, all alone in Mulder's
kitchen, missing them both.
*****
I gave Mel the best blow job I'd ever given him before I told him I was
quitting. He was nearly in tears. "I'll miss you, my boy."
"You're the best boss I've ever had or will have."
He grinned goofily at me. He told me he was proud of me getting a
'real' job, one that had prospects of a future.
"I would've been happy to stay here forever, Mel."
"You're too good for me, Alex. You deserve better."
I left that night with mixed feelings. I wasn't certain I wanted
to work elsewhere. I was feeling like Charlie Brown, who I always
identified with-afraid of the unknown.
****
"Hey, beautiful."
I grinned. Mulder was back. I bounded off the couch and pressed myself
to him. "I missed you."
"Me too."
We kissed and held each other for a moment.
"Skinner told me you're doing well with your training."
"Yeah. I left Mel's today. He's hired someone else already - John
Byers, a very businesslike man. I don't think Mel will get the same
service from him."
Mulder chuckled. "I bet."
I could tell Mulder was very happy that I left Mel's and thought
it very endearing. He wanted what was best for me. I hurriedly
showed
him how much that turned me on. At some point, he touched my side and
I groaned.
"What happened?"
"Just a pulled muscle from training today."
"Lemme see."
He lifted on an elbow in the bed and drew in a sharp breath. "Alex,
you've got a huge bruise."
I shrugged. "I'm fine, Mulder. Come on, I want you."
Mulder hesitated. I liked him being concerned, but I didn't need
to be overindulged. Seeing the look on my face, he pulled me down to
him so I could kiss his concern away.
Just as things were getting hot and heavy, my cell phone rang. I
bought one as soon as I learned I was leaving Mel's and going in for
security training. I scrambled for the phone as Mulder groaned in
disappointment.
"Yeah."
"Alex? Is that you, sweetie?"
"Mom?" I'd forgotten that I'd called her with the good news about the
new job and had given her my cell phone number.
"I just called to tell you something. I'm not interrupting anything, am
I?"
I grinned. My mom had been very supportive of my lifestyle and rarely
intruded in my life. I still visited her for special occasions and
holidays. She had been very happy to learn I'd been with the same man
for the past year.
"No, Mom." Mulder became bored and started licking my ass. I closed my
eyes, loving the sensation.
"Your uncle is expecting his first child. I just thought I'd tell you."
"What? I didn't even know he was married!"
My mother sighed. "He isn't. He got a girl pregnant but he says he
wants to do right by her and help her with the baby."
I winced. My uncle was worse than I was about settling down. "A girl?
How old is she?"
"Um, John wouldn't tell me but I've met her. She couldn't be
older than twenty-one."
I sighed. My uncle hadn't changed his habit of corrupting youth.
I had found out a few things about my uncle that even my mother didn't
know about. I pushed Mulder away when he dipped his fingers into the
crack
of my ass.
"Thanks for telling me, Ma."
"Would you like to come to the baby shower next week? I'm sure Janey
would love to meet you."
"I don't think that would be a good idea, Mom."
She didn't say anything at first. "I understand, sweetie. It would be
awkward, you being so much older than her."
My mom, the pushover. I realized where I got it from. "Well, I hope you
have fun."
She said she loved me and I said the same then we hang up. I sat
up, ignoring Mulder's frustrated moan.
"Hey, what's wrong, Alex?" he asked, realizing I was affected by
the conversation.
"Just family shit. Seems my mom is going to be taking in a boarder
soon." I didn't want Mulder to know the creepy side of my family just
yet. I knew Uncle John would be leaving his girlfriend soon, seeing how
my mom would be doting on her. It was a pattern Uncle John had gotten
into easily over the years. He seemed to leave a wake of pregnant
girls, but this was the first time he involved my mother. He was far
different than I remembered him while I was growing up.
"Sounds like a lovely woman, Alex. I wish I could say the same for my
mother."
I looked at Mulder and realized I was glad there were other things in
my life to distract me from the bullshit. He whooped when I pounced
on him.
****
After two months of training, I was finally offered a job. It was
rather boring, but important. I was going to be a senator's body guard
for an evening out. The senator's regular guard was ill and needed just
a replacement for the evening. It would give me experience for
lengthier assignments later.
I came home to Mulder's apartment late that night, so glad to be home
from the boring evening of standing by while rich people ate and talked
bullshit. I wasn't expecting to hear voices in Mulder's bedroom.
I moved quietly to the room and heard Mulder saying,
"Alex should be home any minute. You sure we should start?" I was about
to grab my gun and run in there when the other person spoke.
"Don't worry, Mulder, he'll just join us when he does."
It was Walter. I sighed with relief but then I grinned. I would love
to see them two together.
I took off the gunbelt around my shoulders and set it aside carefully.
Then I crept to the door and was thankful it was ajar. I peered in and
saw Mulder and Skinner kissing. God, they looked so good together.
Mulder's hands were all over the big guy's body. Those long sensitive
fingers were working Skinner's dress shirt from his suit pants and I
nearly moaned aloud at the memory of those fingers on me. Skinner's
back was soon revealed after Mulder pulled the undershirt off the older
man. I witnessed that big
back being teased by Mulder's hands. I was so hard I had to open up my
zipper
to release some of the strain.
Skinner's hands now had opened Mulder's dress shirt and soon his shirt
was thrown atop Skinner's. Those big hands were now on bare skin,
caressing the hairs between Mulder's nipples then teasing the pink
nubs. Mulder gasped in Skinner's mouth. I nearly gasped aloud too. My
lover
has decidely sensitive nipples. Skinner's mouth trailed down Mulder's
face, nuzzling while Mulder's hands moved down Skinner's back to caress
that sexy ass.
I grasped the bulge that now peeked out of my open fly and slid
my erection through the y-fronts. I was distracted for a moment but
lifted my eyes from my hard cock when I heard Mulder cry out. Skinner's
mouth had found a sensitive spot and was working it good while
Skinner's pants were now around his ankles. Mulder's hands were
grasping at those hard round
cheeks you could bounce quarters off of. I nearly drooled imagining
fucking
that ass while Skinner fucked Mulder. I wasn't sure if the big guy
would
like that or not, but at the moment, I could care less.
My right hand was working me good already and I missed a bit as
my eyes shut, imagining fucking Skinner. A groan from Skinner had me
looking back at my live porn show. Mulder was pulling on Skinner's
thick cock through his BVDs. My Fruit of the Looms felt jealous. I
wondered if I should join in, then was distracted when Skinner ripped
Mulder's boxers off with a
growl. I even ignored my dripping cock as Mulder amazingly submitted to
ubertop Skinner. I don't think I've ever seen anything sexier than
Mulder drowned by hard muscle. Skinner pushed him down on the bed and
loomed
over Mulder's supine body. Mulder eagerly opened his thighs for the big
guy to lean over.
I moved closer to see better and was so glad the door didn't squeak.
Mulder was writhing under Skinner's mouth that was nipping and tasting
my lover all over. I wondered if Mulder felt like he was being
consumed, I know I would have. My cock twitched when Mulder panted as
Skinner's tongue teased his navel. I'd almost forgotten something very
important to me watching live hot sex. I grasped my cock and bit back a
moan. I squeezed my eyes
shut, not wanting to cum too soon.
When I opened my eyes, their eyes were on me. I grinned.
"What are you doing over there?" growled Skinner. "Get that sexy prick
over here so I can suck it."
Like I wouldn't do just that! I hurried over, pulling my pants and
underwear off completely, and scrambled up on the bed to give the big
guy better
access. I moaned as a big hand grasped my cock, pulling on it roughly.
Mulder rose up and began to nibble on my neck and shoulders. I couldn't
keep quiet. Mulder's mouth, Skinner's hand was driving me insane with
lust.
Mulder nibbled on my ear then whispered, "Want to feel both of us
fucking you, baby?"
I groaned, "Oh fuck, yeah!"
They both pulled away from me abruptly and I whimpered.
"On your belly, baby."
I dropped onto my belly then Skinner began nibbling my ass cheeks.
Mulder covered my mouth with his. I was being consumed on both ends and
was loving it.
*****
I woke to the wonderful smells of eggs and bacon cooking in the
kitchen. I stretched, arching my back and wiggling my toes in a full
body tension releaser. I nearly jumped when a hand caressed down my
side, resting on
my hip.
"So sexy," purred Mulder against my ear, sending a thrill down me.
I snorted then gasped when one of Mulder's hand clasped my cock. "Oh
god yeah!"
Lips covered my left nipple and a hot, wet tongue lapped across it. I
moaned in delight.
****
My cell phone rang. It was my mother. She wanted me to come
by and see her. I knew it would be about Uncle John. I really didn't
want to see him. The past two weeks, she'd been calling me off and on
to tell
me how great the girl was doing and how wonderful it was that Uncle
John
was finally settling down. I decided, after I hung up, that I would go
by.
I had to see it for myself.
Mulder was out of town; Walter was busy all week with conferences and
meetings. I told him during lunch that I would probably be away for two
days
at my mother's. He asked me if I was planning to invite him over one
day.
I reassured him that it would be soon, but not now. There was just some
family
business to be taken care of first.
*****
I arrived at my mother's after work; she was as beautiful to me as
always. She had bleached her hair to hide her gray a few years back. It
made her look younger. The house hadn't changed much either over the
years. The only difference was this very pregnant girl, sitting on the
sofa and taking up space. My mom catered to the girl's every
desire.
"Janey is very smart, Alex. She was on the honor roll before she met
Uncle John. She fell in love instantly and decided she wanted to settle
down and raise a family. Isn't that romantic?"
I placated my mother, but there was something I needed to find out
about Janey's college career. I waited until Mother left to check on
something in the kitchen, before asking Janey about her classes.
"Oh, I loved Biology. I would love to get a nursing degree like your
mother one day. Language Arts was so hard, though."
Language Arts? Only high schools called it that!
"You were in high school, weren't you? How old are you, Janey?"
Her blue eyes widened. "I-I'm sixteen. Look, I know it seems I'm too
young, but John loves me. He wants to marry me. I'll make him a good
wife."
I sighed internally. Of course my uncle would have fallen for a young,
impressionable girl. He'd never broken his pattern. My uncle was a
pervert, pure and simple.
When I was with him, though, he made me feel so good about myself. I
wanted to be with him. I would never have felt badly of him about
anything.
He treated me like an equal, like an adult. I learned to drive from
him.
I took my first toke of weed with him. He even taught me how to roll
the
joints. I was just a young, lonely boy wanting to be loved by a father
figure.
Of course, he also helped me lose my virginity and all my innocence
completely.
Looked like he'd done the same to Janey.
I noticed that Janey changed the moment Uncle John entered the
house. Her whole being was focused on him. What man wouldn't want
that from a
woman? The problem, though, was that the man I knew as my uncle wasn't
into girls; he was into boys. Something was up and I was determined to
find out.
"Alex! My boy! It's been so long! Come give your uncle a hug!"
My uncle looked so much like my father that I had to do a double take.
I had never noticed it before. Sure, he'd aged, but he was still very
handsome and charming, if not more so now. He smiled broadly when I
greeted him
and wrapped my arms around him.
When I was a kid, I wanted to believe that my father was irreplacable,
but in fact, I had sought a substitute for him right away. My uncle was
so obviously a good replacement. The only difference was this father
substitute liked to suck his nephew's dick. At the time, though, I so
wanted to feel loved at all costs that I would have accepted anything
he wanted to do to me. The fact that he gave me cool things and spent
time with me was just
a bonus.
Obviously, it was the same charm and fatherly aura that convinced this
pretty, blue eyed, blond girl to fall for my uncle - an aging man who
was still, I was certain, gay. I was going to prove it tonight.
I behaved myself throughout dinner, but when my uncle went out on the
porch to smoke, I followed him.
"You're doing all right, Alex? Your mother tells me you've got a good
job now, working at some fancy security agency."
"Yeah, John. I'm doing alright."
"Still as beautiful as ever, Alex."
I looked over at him, smoke curling around his face as he exhaled. "I'm
surprised that you're settling down, John. Especially with a girl."
"Now, Alex, there comes a time in a man's life when you want to settle
down, have a family."
"Is that what you're doing?" I ask curiously, doubting him completely.
"Well..." He coughed. "I still go down to the bars, Alex. A boy
is always easy to come by."
Asshole! I knew it! Of course he wasn't really settling down.
He looked at me sideways. "You found yourself someone, Alex? Are you
settling down?"
I grinned. "Yes, John. My lover and I are doing well."
"Does he do right by you? If he doesn't, you just tell me. I will take
care of you."
"What do you mean, John?"
"I mean, if you need a place to stay, come by my place. I still have
that same condo, Alex. You remember the place?"
Boy, do I remember it. I was allowed to watch porn and lost my
virginity there. Every day after school, I would go there and he would
suck my cock while we watched porn. Mother always thought I was doing
my homework like a good boy at my uncle's apartment. The fact was, I
made sure to do my
homework before school ended so I could spend time with my uncle. She
never
knew I was being introduced into the wonderful world of gay sex.
"Aren't I a little old for you, Uncle John?" I asked a little
bitterly.
"Alex, you're still so beautiful. Anyone would want to be with you."
He, of course, misunderstood my meaning. He moved closer to me and
cupped
my face in his hand. His thumb rubbed over my lips. "You still
have sexy
lips, Alex. I always dreamed of you sucking me. I bet you're much
better
now than you were then."
I came to my mother's house to prove to myself and, hopefully, my
mother that Uncle John had no intentions of settling down. I never
believed my
mother would find out from catching my uncle kissing me while his hand
was
groping my crotch.
"John? Alex?" my mother cried out when she finally realized what was
going on. She ran back into the house.
I pulled away from John and was about to tell him to talk to her when
he said, "Alex, I best leave. Tell your mother I'll call her
later."
"Bastard!" I called out to his retreating back. I should have ran and
beaten him but instead I went in search of my mother. Janey was in the
living room, eating ice cream and oblivious to what had just happened.
I ran up the stairs to my mother's bedroom where I heard her crying.
"Mom?" I called out softly as I opened her bedroom door. The room
hadn't changed much since the last time I entered her bedroom nearly
ten years
before.
"Alex! How dare you come into my home and corrupt your uncle!" my mom
yelled.
"What?" I couldn't believe what she just said to me.
"You heard me. Your insistence on being gay has robbed your uncle of
his reason!"
"Mom, I wasn't the one kissing John, nor was it my hand--"
"Stop! I don't want to hear it! I saw it with my own eyes!"
"Mom, who do you think taught me how to seduce men?" I knew I should
have couched my words better. She looked at me as if I'd slapped
her.
"Wh-what are you saying, Alex? Did John touch you when you were a boy?"
Her eyes were huge and she looked shocked.
"Mom, I wasn't studying over at Uncle John's apartment after school."
My mother shook as if I had hit her. She stumbled up from the bed and
blurted out, "I think I'm going to be sick!" She ran into the bathroom.
I followed her, hearing her retch into the toilet. I grabbed a
wash
cloth and wet it thoroughly under the tap, then held it out to my mom.
She took it, wiped her face, and stood up.
"Alex, did he tell you never to tell anyone?" she finally asked, her
voice shaking with emotion.
"No, mom. He didn't molest me. I wanted him to touch me."
"Oh my God!" She began to cry loudly. "How could he do that to you? His
own flesh and blood!"
"Mom, please don't hate him for it. I just wanted a father in my life
and Uncle John filled it."
"Oh god, Alex! You don't even know how much you sound like every abused
boy who I've talked to over the years!"
"Mom, I wasn't abused. He didn't touch me until I was fifteen and
didn't do anything with me again after that until I was
seventeen."
She was shaking her head, not hearing or not believing me. "Oh
God,
baby. I left you in the care of a pedophile! You must hate me!"
"Mom, I didn't think we were doing anything wrong. I liked what he
showed me, what he did with me." That didn't help. She cried even
louder and when I went to hold her, she pulled away.
"How can you stand me, Alex? I was oblivious to what was going on with
my child!"
"Mom, please, don't blame yourself. Uncle John didn't change me. I had
already realized I was gay long before he ever touched me."
She was still shaking her head. "Baby, Alex, no. Even if you liked it,
even if you initiated it, he molested you, Alex, because you were
underage."
I didn't agree with her. I don't believe I was molested. Maybe
according to a court of law, but my situation was different. At least
in my eyes
it was.
"Mom, are you going to be all right?"
"A-are you leaving?" she asked me.
"I think that's best."
"Is that why you never come by anymore, Alex? You're reminded that you
were touched by your uncle?"
"No, mom. I...uh." I blushed. "Gay men have busy social lives."
She sighed. "You think your uncle is gay. Is that why you haven't
wanted to participate in his upcoming wedding?"
"I didn't think he would be with a girl, no. I've also heard rumors
that he was sleeping with girls and leaving them to fend for themselves
after they became pregnant."
My mom gasped. "Oh God! No wonder you didn't want to be bothered! Your
uncle is a creep, a low life scum! Oh no! Janey! She was so
looking forward to the wedding!"
"Mom, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe Uncle John will marry Janey. He
seemed
to say he was going to. But I don’t think that means he wouldn’t stop
seeking male companionship outside the marriage."
My mom shook her head. "I think I will tell Janey not to trust him."
"Do you want me to talk to her?" I asked, though I really didn’t want
to. The poor girl would have my mother as her advocate. That was the
best thing going for her, especially if Uncle John had no intention of
marrying her.
"No, that's okay, Alex. You go back to your boyfriend. I would love to
see him sometime…but not until after this is settled first."
I nodded then hugged my mom. "I love you," I told her. She began to cry
in my arms.
"Don’t worry, Mom. I'm fine. I promise."
She pulled away and nodded, wiping her face with a tissue from a box
on top of the back of the toilet.
"I will call you later - sometime next week, probably. Okay?"
I nodded. "All right, Mom. See ya."
She stopped me before I ran off.
"Alex, I'm sorry, but I want you to remember - I love you and always
will."
I smiled at her and said, "I know." I left her bedroom and then her
house. I felt a little better about finally telling my mom something
that she
had never known about. It wasn't my intention that she ever know what
happened to me, though. She would never understand, but then I never
thought she
would. I hope things work out for Janey.
****
A week later, Mom called me to tell me that John was sticking with
the marriage plans, though he was a little antsy at his sister in law
being so angry with him. Mom hadn't been able to convince Janey that
John was
nothing other than a great man for loving her. Some
people never
learn. Janey was young yet, though, and Mom would be there for her.
****
I didn't hear from my mother again in weeks, but one day when I was
coming in from work, I heard Mulder on his phone.
"...he's not going to like that."
"Yeah, I know."
"Are you certain it will work?"
"All right. I will do my best."
"See ya."
After he hung up the phone, I moved closer to him and he wrapped his
arms around me.
"Walter not coming tonight?"
"That wasn't Walter."
"Oh? Scully?"
"Actually, no. It was your mother."
I stiffened immediately. "Why were you talking with my mom?"
"She's worried about you."
I didn't like the sound of that at all. "And why would she be worried
about me?"
"She told me what happened a few weeks ago."
"What does that have to do with me?"
Mulder stared at me closely for a moment before saying, "Well, I didn't
want to believe it myself. You seriously don't think that what happened
at
your mother's house involved you?"
"It affected my mother and Janey more than it did me. Why do you think
I would be affected by it?"
"Alex, don't you see how being kissed and fondled by your uncle would
affect you?"
"Mulder, if that is what my mother told you, then she misled you. I
never claimed that my uncle didn't initiate me into gay sex. I
only said it didn't upset me, nor do I believe I was molested."
Mulder shook his head. "Your mother told me your uncle first touched
you when you were fifteen. You don't think that it was wrong for an
uncle to fondle
his underage nephew?"
"Mulder, my uncle didn't do anything I didn't want him to."
"So, now you're saying you caused it to happen?"
I laughed. "I didn't seduce my uncle, if that's what you mean. I did,
though, rub my hard dick against him."
Mulder paused a moment then asked, "And then he touched you
inappropriately?"
"No, Mulder, he didn't touch me inappropriately because I wanted him to
touch me."
Mulder smiled. "Now I see why your mother is worried about you, Alex."
I was irritated at this point. "Mulder, just because I disagree with
the terms used, doesn't mean I'm in denial of what happened."
"Alex, I studied psychology at Oxford. I know human behavior very well.
Semantics doesn't change what happened to you."
I shook my head, closing my eyes in frustration. "You don't get it, do
you? According to the laws of the land, just because a man touched me
'inappropriately' as you said, means I was molested in some way. Well,
I disagree with that assessment, Mulder. I have a right to disagree. I
was the one of the participants, therefore, I would know better than
anyone what happened."
"What exactly happened, Alex?"
I thinned my lips and refused to speak. How dare he try to
psychoanalyze me--especially after listening to my mother?
"Come on, Alex. I'm not trying to choose a side here. I took what your
mother said with a grain of salt, but after speaking with you, I see
that she may have been on to something. I just want to verify if it's
really true."
I sighed. "Mulder, I know you're trying to help me but I'm trying to
tell you there is no need."
"Could you just humor me for a moment? I promise you this isn't an
interrogation and I have no desire to take sides."
I didn't say anything so he began with, "So, you rubbed yourself
against your uncle and then he touched you?"
"He jerked me off, Mulder. That's all he did. There weren't any kisses
or fondling--just a hand in my drawers and then he jerked me off. He
didn’t kiss
me or touch me in anyway before or afterwards. It was almost
impersonal."
"Hm. And he didn't touch you again until you were older?"
"Yeah. In fact, he avoided me for two years after that. I was
more interested in the boys in my school by that time, anyway."
"And that's when he had sex with you."
"Mulder, he didn't plan it, it just happened."
"And that means it wasn't inappropriate for him to do?"
"Mulder, even if it was inappropriate, doesn't mean I had a problem
with it."
"And you don't have a problem with it now?"
"Only in that I have to answer questions about it. I should never have
told my mother. I only did it because she accused me of molesting my
uncle!"
"Alex, your mother told me she never meant to accuse you of that. She
was flustered and didn't understand what was going on."
Alex sighed. "She told you that as well, huh?"
"Yeah, Alex. She even told me she threw up when she learned you were
touched by your uncle."
"Then you need to talk to her, not me. She thinks it's her fault it
happened. That's worse than thinking it's my uncle's fault."
"Alex, he was the adult. He was responsible for you. He was the
father
in your life and he took advantage of the situation."
I shook my head. "Legally, yes, but otherwise, no."
"Legally is the only way that counts for situations like this, Alex."
I rolled my eyes. "Are you saying that I should get my uncle arrested
for it now?"
"No, but maybe you should talk to someone about it."
"I have been talking about it enough! I don't need to speak to anyone
else about this! I don't have a problem with what my uncle showed me. I
wanted it!"
"Why did you want your uncle to touch you like that, Alex?"
I growled at him and ran into the living room and turned on the TV.
Mulder followed me and turned the TV off. "What?" I yelled at him.
"Obviously, you wanted some older man to be kind to you, to be
something your own father wasn't."
"What's wrong with that? Yes, I wanted an older man to be nice to me.
There's nothing wrong with that!"
"There is if you wanted him to have sex with you."
"What? I could only have sex with people my own age? Mulder, this was
years ago, the laws have changed since then. What was appropriate then
is different today."
"Yes, the laws are different, but you also let your uncle kiss and
touch you recently."
I couldn't believe my ears. "And what does that tell you, oh great
psychologist?!"
"It tells me you have a sexual addiction, very likely."
I laughed, shaking my head. Now I have a sexual addiction.
"Do you seriously think I have an addiction to sex, Mulder?" I finally
asked him after calming down.
"I don't know, but I do think you should speak to an expert about it."
"No."
"Alex, please."
"No!"
"Just think about it," he whined. I hated when he whined. I couldn't
stop myself from doing anything he wanted when he whined like
that.
"OK, fine, I will think about it."
He grinned and said, "Great, that's all I needed to hear."
I groaned and put my hands over my face. All that just to hear me say
I'd think about seeing someone. Well, I resented it completely. And I
blamed my
mother totally for involving Mulder in this.
I didn’t realize it at the time why Mulder harangued me about my sexual
history. I had been avoiding something I didn’t want to think about. It
was
directly related to my involvement with my uncle and why I had no
problems
with it. I had a serious kink that I had been avoiding since I was with
Mulder.
That was what I was denying.
****
Mulder didn't say another word about it until a week later when he
asked if I had made a decision.
"Yes, I've made a decision."
"What have you decided?" he asked patiently.
"I talked to my boss about it. I know he counsels all his personnel on
all kinds of issues. I told him I didn't think I had a problem but
someone who had training in psychology thought I should talk to
someone. He thought I should try an online test for sexual addiction
for gay men. He even gave me
a link."
Mulder breathed a heavy sigh of relief. "That's wonderful, baby. Would
you like to use my laptop to take it?"
I grinned. "Sure. You can watch me if you don't trust me, Mulder."
"Baby, of course I trust you, but I would love to be with you when you
take it."
"All right."
Gay Men Sexual Addiction Screening Test
The Gay Men Sexual Addiction Screening Test (G-SAST) is a set of
questions to help you see your sexual activity more clearly. It is an
assessment of
sexually compulsive or addictive behavior. A high number of YES answers
may be a sign of
some issues with sex addiction. After using this questionnaire, please
consult a
trained professional
to discuss these issues further.
1. Were you sexually abused as a child or adolescent?
2. Do you regularly purchase romance novels or sexually explicit
magazines?
3. Have you stayed in a romantic relationship after it became
emotionally or physically abusive?
4. Do you often find yourself preoccupied with sexual thoughts or
romantic daydreams?
5. Do you feel that your sexual behavior is normal?
6. Does your spouse (or significant other(s)) ever worry or complain
about your sexual behavior?
7. Do you have trouble stopping your sexual behavior when you know it
is inappropriate?
8. Do you ever feel bad about your sexual behavior?
9. Has your sexual behavior ever created problems for you and your
family?
10. Have you ever sought help for sexual behavior you did not like?
11. Have you ever worried about people finding out about your sexual
activities?
12. Has anyone been hurt emotionally because of your sexual behavior?
13. Have you ever participated in a sexual activity in exchange for
money or gifts?
14. Do you have times when you act out sexually followed by periods of
celibacy (no sex at all)?
15. Have you made efforts to quit a type of sexual activity and failed?
16. Do you hide some of your sexual behavior from others?
17. Do you find yourself having multiple romantic relationships at the
same time?
18. Have you ever felt degraded by your sexual behavior?
19. Have sex or romantic fantasies been a way for you to escape your
problems?
20. When you have sex, do you feel depressed afterwards?
21. Do you regularly engage in sado-masochistic behavior?
22. Has your sexual activity interfered with your family life?
23. Have you been sexual with minors?
24. Do you feel controlled by your sexual desire or fantasies of
romance?
25. Do you ever think your sexual desire is stronger than you are?
"Mulder, I only answered a very few yes's to these questions."
"What about number one? You were touched by your uncle..."
"I wasn't an adolescent, Mulder."
"Alex, adolescent ages range from fourteen to eighteen."
"I thought adolescence was younger than that."
"No, those are preadolescent ages, Alex."
"OK, fine, but I still don't think I was molested."
"What about number nine."
"The problems aren't caused by my sexual behavior, Mulder--only what
happened to me when I was fifteen."
He agreed that I more than likely wasn't sexually addicted, but I still
needed to talk to someone about what happened to me.
"Alex, you were only fifteen, and he was your uncle."
"All right then, I will look for a website about incest, Mulder."
He was very happy that I chose to do that. I did a search on incest and
came up with several websites and laughed when I came across porn sites
for
incest.
"Well, how amusing, but let's go to this one about incest survivors,
silly boy."
I clicked on the site link and the site listed the goals of the
organization and the effects incest had on the victims.
"Well, this talks continuously of how the victims were damaged or hurt
by the actions of someone they trusted, not just family members. This
doesn't apply to me, Mulder. I don't think I was damaged or hurt by
what my uncle and I did. I certainly never felt disgusted by what we
did nor did I want to throw up after we had sex."
"You never told your mother about it."
I laughed. "What teenage boy comes home and tells his mother about who
he fucked?"
"Touché. I never told my mother I fucked Sara James after school behind
the bleachers while her girlfriend watched us."
"Kinky, Mulder." I grinned at him.
"But then Sara was my age and not related to me."
I shrugged my shoulder. "My uncle was related to me, but I wasn't
negatively effected by what we did when I was fifteen or later when I
was seventeen."
I turned off the computer and said, "I have talked with my boss about
it and I have even looked up sites. I think I have done more about it
than I ever needed to."
"All right, Alex. That was for you, but what about your mother?"
"What?"
"Your mother is traumatized by what she learned. She is seeing a
psychiatrist but she needs your help, too, Alex."
"Mulder, you talk to her. I have no problems with what happened, she
does."
Mulder didn't say anything at first then asked, "Do you love your
mother?"
"Of course I do."
"Then talk to her."
I close my eyes. "All right, I will talk to her. No way am I going to
counseling with her, though."
"Well, it's a start."
He rose and left me alone with the TV. I frowned and just sat, thinking
of how this night turned from one of the few days we got to be together
into a night of feelings and therapy. I felt drained. What a day. I lay
on the couch and, in a few minutes, I was asleep.
A hand touched my face and I woke. "Wha-?" I asked sleepily.
"Wanna go to bed with me?"
I grinned. "You betcha."
I rose and followed Mulder to bed. I didn’t know it at the time, but
Mulder was doing what he could to make sure I was all right. He knew I
was potentially damaged by what happened to me. I'm so glad he let me
make the decisions to
find out for myself. I would have resented any other way.
***
Since the crap with my uncle, things were a little tense with my
mother,
but I agreed to see her about a week later. I loved her and wanted her
to
realize she hadn't been a bad mother or neglectful. It wasn't easy,
with
my job taking me places all over the state sometimes and out of it, I
finally
had an opportunity and went for it.
My mom was waiting for me. She hugged me and kissed me and told me how
beautiful
I was. I just smiled and said, "Not as beautiful as you, Ma."
She grinned. "Come on in. I have been seeing a counselor like Fox
suggested."
Fox? She calls him Fox? I hid my smile.
"Where's Janey?" I asked, not really certain if I wanted to see her
again.
"She's staying with her parents. John left again; I don’t think he'll
be
back anytime soon."
"I'm sorry."
"It's not your fault, Alex. She's doing all right. She has support from
her
parents and me, of course. I will definitely spend time with her and
the
baby when it arrives."
"You're a good person, mom."
She smiled then began to cry.
"Oh, mom, you don’t have to cry…"
"I do, I feel like I failed you. I know in a way it's not really my
fault,
but I can't help but feel responsible, even a little."
"You were responsible for me as a parent, but I was a typical teenager.
I
was stubborn and loved the fact my uncle wanted to be with me. I never
wanted
to hurt you, though. I should never have told you."
"Oh, baby, I'm glad you did. I confronted John with what happened. The
jerk
said you wanted it. Th-that you were a slut and eager for it." She was
mad
now. "How dare he say those things about you? I hit him!"
I looked shocked then laughed. "Mom, you hit Uncle John?"
"That's right! I think that's why he left for good this time. I told
him
he was an evil pedophile and he would rot in hell."
I shook my head but said, "You go, Mom!"
She sighed and shook her head as well. "Are you sure you're alright,
Alex?
I nod. "Yes, Mom. I guess in a way I felt a bit like that- like a slut,
though
it seemed perfectly natural to me. I wanted to be with boys." I
blushed,
hating to tell this to my mom, but hoping it would help her understand
a
little. "I knew before Uncle John touched me that I liked boys, Mom."
She nodded. "OK, I see that. You certainly have done well with
yourself,
especially since you met Fox. He told me where you two met. I'm so glad
he
swept you off your feet and took you away from Mel's."
I looked at her curiously.
"I heard from some women whose husbands frequented that place- they
lost
their husbands to young men who sucked them off there. Did you know
that?"
She blushed telling me this.
It was my time to blush. "I think I was the young man, mom."
"Oh my god!" She gasped, then started laughing. "You sucked off Jessica
Stein's
husband?"
I smirked. "Was he the bearded man who worked in hardware and had a
beer
gut?"
She nodded.
"Yeah, I really don’t know why he came there the first time, he never
bought
suits."
She burst out laughing again.
Things went well with my mom after that. She still went to see her
therapist
for a while afterwards.
*****
Skinner was oblivious to the whole thing, only talking to me about my
job
and how well I was doing there. It was about two weeks after visiting
my
mom that I finally told him about what happened.
"Wait, you're telling me that your uncle molested you when you were a
kid?"
I fumed, "Geez, not another one!"
He looked at me curiously. "Surely you don't think that uncles and
nephews
do that all the time, do you?"
I glared at him. "Of course not!"
"Then what makes you any different than anyone else who has been
inappropriately
touched by a relative?"
"I wasn't disturbed by it. In fact, I loved it."
Skinner raised an eyebrow as if he thought it would intimidate me, it
didn't.
"Skinner, you aren't the only one upset with me over this. Mulder
called
me sexually addicted!"
He pulled me in his arms and held me. "Are you absolutely sure you
weren't
upset by what your uncle did to you?"
"Walter, I'm convinced that what we did was a mutual thing. I knew that
some
wouldn't approve of us together, mostly because we were related than
our
age difference, though. It didn't upset me. I thought it cool I
was with
someone forbidden."
"Was it because you wanted love from an older male?" he asked, softly.
I nodded against his shoulder. "I'm sure that was part of it, but I
didn't
feel ashamed that it was my uncle or that our relationship was sexual
rather
than paternal."
"You don't think your uncle was a predator?"
"No."
He pondered that a moment before saying, "Well, I have been a 'daddy'
to
young men before, even when I first went to gay bars and clubs. I was
always
big and just the type for certain guys who wanted to be treated like
they
were being taken care of by a father figure. You think what you had
with
your uncle was different?"
"Yes, I know it was different." Then I grinned. "You've been a 'daddy'
before?"
Walter returned my smile. "Yes. Is that something you want? A fantasy
you'd
like to act out?"
"Oh yeah, with you it would be amazing!"
He looked at me carefully. "You've done this before, I take it?"
"Well, yeah." I shrugged. "I've always sought out older men. I get off
on
being
taken care of by an older, daddy type."
"You like being someone's boy?"
I grinned. "Oh yeah."
"I could do that for you, Alex, but we should talk to Mulder about it."
"I would love to play with you."
We decided to tell Mulder we would have an evening to ourselves and he
seemed
to take it well.
****
When the night arrived, Mulder wasn't jealous as far as I could tell. I
went
off to spend the night with Skinner after coming home from work,
eating,
cleaning myself out thoroughly and kissing Mulder goodnight.
When I arrived at Walter's apartment building, I felt so unsure of
myself.
I was afraid in more ways than one, and they contradicted each other.
On
the one hand, I was afraid he would be OK, but not as great as I
imagined.
On the other hand, I was afraid he would be the best thing I'd ever
had.
That scared me more than anything. If he were the one man I had been
searching
for, I knew I was a dead man. Not in the literal sense but in the
figurative.
I knew if he were the man of my dreams, I'd never get over it. If he
wasn't
as great as that, then I doubted I'd ever find the one for me and that
truly
terrified me.
*****
There I was, entering Walter's apartment after he opened the door for
me.
He looked so good, so sexy, so much the man of my dreams I was certain
he
would be the one just from looks alone. It's no wonder other men sought
him
out to be their daddy. I certainly would have glommed onto him first
thing
if I had seen him when I used to bar hop.
He was wearing this tight t-shirt, stark white like the starched dress
shirts
he wore under his suit coat. It stretched over his broad chest and
showed
off a hint of his nipples and hair underneath. I was drooling. He wore
tight
black jeans that hugged his long legs, his muscular ass and slender
hips
and waist. He was perfect.
"So, you want to be my boy?" he growled softly.
I nodded.
"Speak up, boy."
"I do." I had to clear my throat, I nearly squeaked it out. I knew I
was
flushed and hated myself for it.
"You look very pretty when you blush, boy. Let me see the rest of you."
I immediately began taking my clothes off. He was into the more
dominant
games than some daddies were that I'd been with. I knew what to do,
though.
I'd been in the same situation plenty of times. I folded my clothes
neatly
on the living room coffee table and then stood up. My legs were
slightly
parted and my ass tilted up. My chest was out, on display, and my hands
hung
loosely at my sides.
"Very good boy. Your experience is a bonus. I like my boys well
trained.
Someone must have done very well with you."
He moved closer to me and seemed to study me closely. He moved every
once
in awhile to see me at a different angle. A drip of sweat ran down my
temple
by the time he had studied me completely. The room temperature had been
nice
when I had removed my clothes, but now I was hot, burning up from his
stares
and my desire to stay still for him. I desperately wanted to pounce on
him
and beg him to fuck me. It had been way too long and he was just so
much
of a turn on for me like this.
"You've been working out lately, but I see there is a tendency to gain
weight
in the belly and waist. You'll make sure that doesn't happen, right my
boy?"
"Yes, sir." I called him sir, which was generally fine since he hadn't
told
me to call him anything and he certainly hadn't claimed me yet. It was
a
neutral enough word.
He moved over to a panel on the wall and I realized he must have
spotted
that I was sweating. In a matter of moments, my sweat began to dry on
my
skin and I shivered. My nipples hardened in the cool air.
He smiled at that. "You're very beautiful, boy. I think you would make
a
wonderful playmate. Tell me, do you like to be spanked?"
I grinned. "Only when I'm a bad boy, sir."
He returned my grin. "Hm, I like to spank bad boys' bottoms. I think
we're
in for a treat."
My cock twitched at that and he laughed. He reached out and petted my
dick
and I moaned. I closed my eyes as his hand loosely gripped my slowly
expanding
flesh.
"I like my boys to be big to fit my big hand. You definitely seem to
fit
it well." The words were practically purred close to my ear. I
moaned as
he bent and suckled on my ear as he continuously stroked me
softly. He let
my dick slip from his hand and then turned me around. He
whistled. "Very
sexy ass, boy. I will get many hours of pleasure spanking and fucking
this
ass."
He gripped my ass cheeks and kneaded them like dough. Lust was shooting
through
me. I loved it when a man was so dominant and forceful. Just then, he
bent
down and spread my ass cheeks. I nearly screamed when his tongue lapped
over
my asshole. Then he hummed, showing his appreciation. I was shaking
with
desire and desperately wanted something thicker and longer to replace
the
tongue that was laving my hole. My thighs shook from the pleasure
coursing
through my veins. Just when I was certain that he would be causing me
to
shoot just from his tongue alone, he abruptly pulled away from me. I
cried
my frustration.
He ran a hand up and down my quivering flank, murmuring soothingly,
"Don't
worry, boy. There will be plenty more of that later. Right now I want
to
warm up this very cold ass and brighten it with some color. Would you
like
that?"
"Yes, sir, please," I begged him.
My cock was flat against my stomach, leaking shamelessly at the mere
mention
of getting spanked. Some men were very good at this, others weren't.
The
ones that were bad were either too light or too harsh or too
inconsistent.
I had a feeling Walter would be one of the good ones.
"Have you been a bad boy, Alex?"
I had to bite back a moan from just the sound of his voice. "Y-yes,
sir.
I've been bad."
"And what do bad boys get when they are caught?"
"P-punished, sir." He had set this up wonderfully. I knew when he was
finished
with me, I would pass out from the orgasm I would have.
"And how should the boy be punished by his daddy?"
"W-with a s-spanking, sir." I could hardly get the words out; I was so
ready
for it.
The scene was so hot to me. No matter how many times I'd done this
before
with other men, doing this with someone like Skinner was far more
visceral.
It hit me so hard. My body was trembling. My pulse rapid. I almost felt
faint.
His hands caressed my rear, showing me who owned it, who owned me. I
was
so hard; I would have crumbled to pieces if I held a jackhammer.
He laid me over his legs, those two sturdy columns of flesh, bone
padded
by hard muscle. I wanted to worship them, worship him.
Though he's a big man, so am I. My face was practically hitting the
floor.
He rubbed my ass possessively, caressing the skin as if he loved the
feel
of it. He did it continuously until I was practically zoned. Then he
lifted
one of his hands and let it fall over my left ass cheek. I winced, but
it
was barely a tap. It caused my cock to jump. I bit back a moan, not
wanting
to give away how much this was effecting me, how much I wanted this.
His hits became harder, more frequent and continued until I was half
grunting
with the blows. Each pounding of flesh caused my cock to jump and drool
all
that much more. 'What a mess', I thought before he gave me one last
spank
then lifted me in his lap and held me. I wasn't even aware I had been
crying
until one of his hands came up and wiped the tears from my face. Damn,
where
did they come from? I wasn't hurting, it felt good.
He soothed me, and I wondered why. Yes, I may have cried but...then it
hit
me- I have been sobbing. Shit, I had no idea it would effect me
so harshly.
He then kissed me and told me he loved me, but I didn't say anything. I
had
no idea what to say and I was too afraid to say the wrong thing.
He held me for a while then murmured, "Would you like me to take care
of
this?"
His hand touched my still very hard cock. I had no idea that I was
still
hard. A frisson of lust ran through my body and I nodded my head
He smiled then patted my side. I rose from his lap then he led me to
his
bedroom.
Once there, he removed his clothing slowly while I sat watching him. My
whole
body was responding to his every move.
He gestured for me to lie back, and I did immediately, pushing a pillow
under
my ass.
"So beautiful, are you my beautiful boy?"
"Yes," I half croaked, my voice heavy with desire.
He ran his right hand down my body and I shivered. The sweat that had
covered
my body before was now cooling on me. He suddenly pinched one of my
nipples
hard and I gasped. Damn that hurt, but it sent such a shiver of lust
through
me.
"Do you want Daddy to fuck you?"
I nodded, unable to say a word. I watched as he stroked his cock then
put
on a condom. He spread a layer of lube over it before he put his knees
on
the bed and spread my legs wide.
I closed my eyes, the possessive grip of his hands was addicting. I
didn't
know if I could stand waiting any longer. My ass wanted to be fucked.
I felt him maneuver over me and I opened my eyes when I felt the tip of
his
dick on my asshole. His eyes were dark chocolate passion.
"Ready for me?" he growled.
"Oh yeah," I moaned, thrusting my hips up to greet his cock.
"So eager. My sweet boy is so eager for me."
Fuck, if he didn't fuck me soon, I would come just from the sound of
his
voice. I squeezed my eyes shut in frustration and, at that moment, he
thrust
inside me. I cried out. The pain was slight and only added to the
pleasure
of him finally inside me.
He let me adjust to him then bent down, putting his weight on me. I
felt
enveloped by him and I almost panicked for a second. I've never been
claustrophobic
before but now I could see deeply into his eyes. His eyes seemed to
possess
me. Then his mouth covered mine and he began to thrust inside me,
slowly.
Oh god, he was going to fuck me slowly, agonizingly. His hands gripped
mine
and pinned them to the bed as he angled just right and I gasped as he
scraped
my prostate.
Mulder had fucked me like this many times before but I had never felt
such
fear from it, which was the only thing I could think to call the
sinking
feeling in my stomach.
When he picked up the pace, the sinking feeling was replaced with pure
pleasure
and I was swept away by the rutting, by our sweaty bodies moving
together.
Our mouths claimed each other just as one of his hands grasped my cock
between
our bodies.
He rocked against me a few more times, squeezing my dick, then his
other
hand flicked my nipple and I hissed. He grinned down at me and said,
"Come."
I did it without even thinking. The pleasure was intense but shadowed
by
my odd feelings. Then he gripped my hips tightly and began to pound me,
waves
of intense feeling spread through me, jarring away the odd feelings.
When he collapsed atop me, he held me tightly, kissing me softly before
pulling
out of me. He gathered me close and whispered, "My sweet boy" before
falling
asleep.
*****
I realized I was falling in love with Walter after that night. It
scared
me, so I spent extra time with Mulder, knowing that I loved Mulder, and
he
was more easy-going. My love for him didn't bother me like the feelings
I
had for Walter.
After weeks of this, Walter finally caught me and trapped me against
the
corner of Mulder's bedroom and growled, "Why have you been avoiding me,
boy?"
I bit my lip. When he spoke to me like that, I was weak. "I-I haven't."
I
sounded like a little boy and hated myself for it.
He laughed. "You have." The words were a force of nature. I couldn't
not
respond to them. "I was frightened." I couldn't lie to this man,
not when
he was like this, like every fantasy I've ever had.
"Of what, baby? What's the problem? Didn't you enjoy our time together?"
I moaned against his throat where I had buried my face like a
frightened
little boy. "You know I did."
"You did. You loved when I spanked you, when I fucked you, when I held
you
in my arms."
I sobbed with emotion. Damn, but I was addicted to him like this.
"Tell me what you want," he growled in my ear.
I gasped.
"Tell me."
"I want... I want you to fuck me."
He shook his head. "Not like that, boy. Ask your daddy what you want
from
him."
I shook. He wasn't going to let me get away with anything. I had to say
it.
"Daddy, please fuck me."
He pulled my face from his throat and kissed me passionately.
"See, I knew my sweet boy could do it. You want Daddy to make it
better?"
I moaned, closing my eyes, reveling in the sound, the closeness, the
fantasy
become reality.
"Yes, please, Daddy. Make it better."
He undressed us hurriedly and I stood still like a good boy and let
him.
He lay me down on the bed then lay atop me, kissing and teasing me. I
heard
a noise and looked over toward the door. Mulder was staring at us, part
in
shock and part in lust. I tried smiling at him, but Walter sucked on my
right
nipple just as his cock slid inside me and I had to close my eyes and
moan.
When I was able to open my eyes again, Mulder had moved closer and
there
was a curious expression on his face. I pried one of my hands off the
headboard
and held it out for him. Mulder moved toward me and took my hand.
Walter
looked over at him but continued to fuck me, not distracted at all, but
distracting
me from even realizing Mulder was holding my hand.
Walter's mouth covered mine, but I could feel Mulder gripping my hand
tightly,
not wanting to let me go. I couldn't even squeeze his hand to let
him know
I appreciated him being there. Walter was driving me out of my mind
with
his drilling cock.
An angled thrust hit me just right and I groaned. I bit my lip to keep
from
shooting but I was so close. Walter groaned, getting close as well,
then
he growled, "Tell me, my boy. Tell me."
I whimpered, wanting to close my eyes to hide, but I stupidly looked
into
Walter's deep brown eyes and I was mesmerized.
"Tell me," he growled again
I gasped out, "I love you, Daddy."
He grunted, stilled a moment, his eyes shutting as he came deep inside
me.
He managed to say, "I love you too," before I cried out my release
without
even a touch.
I must have blacked out for a moment. When I came to, Mulder was
holding
my hand tightly and I blushed furiously when I looked into his eyes.
Walter
had moved off me and was still trying to regain his breath and calm his
heart
rate.
A sense of calm and peace settled over me. I realized I wasn't ashamed,
as
I was just a moment before, looking into Mulder's eyes. Mulder didn't
look
upset, just curious and horny.
I looked deliberately down at his crotch, which was tenting his pants
drastically,
but he didn't say anything or make a move. I wondered how long he had
been
watching us.
"Mulder?" I began.
"Sh. Let me get a cloth and clean you both up."
I nodded and he finally let go of my hand, but before he left, I put it
to
my lips and kissed it. He smiled then left and returned quickly
with a warm,
wet cloth to clean us up.
"You know I love you," I told him before blushing furiously.
He nodded. "I know."
I couldn't believe I'd actually said it, but, at the same time, I felt
an
amazing sense of calm and peace settle over me. I didn't want to
examine
that too closely, but I knew it was from finally acknowledging my love
for
both these two good men in my life. But I was frightened.
I had a wonderful job, a wonderful personal life, what could possibly
be
wrong? I guess I was afraid of Murphy's Law. I have always felt like I
was
Charlie Brown--afraid to try new things, afraid of everything
practically...until
I met my lovers. I know that may sound absurd, given my history,
but it
was the way I felt.
Did it mean this was happily ever after? No, it just meant it was a
life
better than I'd ever hoped, better than I ever thought I'd have. That
was
good enough for me.
THE END