Chapter One:  The Boy in the Gundam
 

It was dark.  The kind of darkness you could snuggle up into and spend an eternity wrapped
in sleep.  Which was what Duo Maxwell was doing at that moment; a slight reprieve before
he had to go out and fight more OZ baddies.

"Wake up!"

The words sliced through the warm, soft darkness, attempting to force Duo out of his hard-
earned slumber back into the real world.  Well, for right now the real world could stuff it.
He wasn't waking up, and that was that.

"Maxwell!  Wake up!"

That had to be Wu Fei.  No one else called Duo by his last name.  Wu Fei could call him all
he wanted, but Duo wasn't even going to lift his eyelids a crack.  "Go away," he murmured,
trying to shift to a more comfortable position, but, he seemed to be wearing seatbelts.  He
was strapped in tight, wherever he was.  He gave up trying to move, settling instead to a
slight shifting of  his head in order to relieve a  gnawing cramp in his neck.

An ominous silence followed the last exchange of words.  Duo heard suspicious whisper-soft
movements around him, or rather in the vicinity of his lap.  He decided it would be better to
open his eyes before-

THWACK!

"OW!  My nose!"  Duo yelped, protectively covering his injured nose while snapping his
eyes open.  "Geez, Wu Fei!  You didn't have to do *that*!"  He suddenly realized he was
safe within Deathscythe's cockpit, with the door closed and emergency lighting flickering
on.  "Wu Fei?  What the hell... what happened?"

"It's about time."

Duo glanced down into his lap where a chibi version of Wu Fei was glaring at him, arms
crossed petulantly across his chest.  "Wu Fei?  Hey, when did you get so small?"

"Never mind that," Wu Fei hedged, bristling.  "You have to open the cockpit."

"Aw, you look so cute!" Duo grinned, blissfully ignoring the danger that could accompany
that comment, especially when made to a proud, experienced martial artist like Wu Fei.  "I
always thought you'd look better if you were shorter and gained some weight.  I think you'll
start to be everybody's favorite character if you stay that way!  Everyone loves chibis!  But
we've got to do something about that ha-...oww!" Duo grabbed his twice-recently-kicked
nose, not appreciating the graceful arc of the Chinese pilot's form as he landed.  "Will you
stop already!  Geez, even short you're strong!"

Frowning, Wu Fei once again assumed the ready position for an attack.

"Okay!  Okay!  I get it!  No more chi...er... shor...er I won't call you not-tall again."

Somewhat placated, Wu Fei relaxed again into a standing position, imperiously tapping his
foot.  "Now that you're done prattling, open the cockpit door.  We must assess our
surroundings, then figure out what course of action to take."

"Yeah, yeah,"  Duo mumbled, checking the status of the Gundum using his left hand while
the right began nursing his swelling nose.  "First Heero now Wu Fei. I'm surprised my nose
is still normal from all this.  Let's see.... radar.... huh?  It's dead!  How did that happen?
Okaaaay, comunication screen... dead... weapon systems.... dead.... hey, Wu-man, I don't
think anything's working."

Wu Fei frowned.  "The cockpit must open," he said stubbornly.

"If it does, it'd be the only thing working around here.... what happened anyway?"

Wu Fei blinked at him a moment with his large eyes, then squinted as he tried to remember.
"We were attacking a naval base off the coast of Puerto Rico.  I was attacking the south side
while Yuy and yourself were-"

"At the north, and Quatre and Trowa were east and west. Yeah, I remember all that now,
but..."  Duo scratched his head.  "I can't seem to remember what happened afterwards.  Lets
see, there was a lot of wind, I think there was a storm coming up, then I was attacked
suddenly by three Mobile Dolls, one of which had a big gun..." he trailed off, remembering
the light as the gun fired directly at Deathscythe.  He suddenly had a sinking feeling.

"Am I dead?!" he asked, quickly grabbing his wrist to check for a pulse, thinking `not
again!'  If he was...

"This isn't a Death Arc fic," Wu Fei explained, patience growing thinner by the moment.

"Oh, yeah, I forgot."  Relieved, Duo flipped the switch to open the cockpit, which luckily
was working.  "I was worried there for a minute.  Not that I wouldn't mind seeing Botan
again, but being dead just isn't a good feeling, you know?  Now," he unbuckled the guard
straps around him, "let's see where we are."
 
The door opened with a hiss to reveal a monochromatic blue landscape. Sky, trees, grass,
telephone booths, even houses were varying shades of blue, as though the one who painted it
only had a blue pallet.  The only thing not blue was the swarm of dwarf-like people rushing
towards his Gundam, a look of eager anticipation in their eyes as they waved about various
gadgetry.  Most were dressed in white labcoats, though those that were not still possessed the
aura that could give them the title `Doctor', and all had the same greedy look in their beady
little eyes.  Surrounding the Gundam, they started poking and prodding it with delight, every
so often getting into a scientific argument of some sort.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing to my Deathscythe!  Get off!"  Duo leaped down to
the vibrating circle of white surrounding his inert machine, Wu Fei clinging to his hair with
his chubby little fingers.  "Stop!  Don't use *that* thing on it, you'll ruin the-!  Get off there!
That's a weapon!  I-,ack!"  He jumped as someone prodded him with something cold and
metal.  "Ow, that... Dr. G?"

The shrunken scientist peered up at Duo, his protruding nose providing the perfect divider
for his mop of hair.  "If you don't mind, I'd like to open you up.  You appear to be a
fascinating specimen of android."

"Android?  I'm a human!  Human!  You're a scientist, can't you tell a real person from a
machine?"

Disappointment flickered across Dr. G's features.  "What about that wind-up toy on your
shoulder?"

"I am *not* a toy!" Wu Fei trilled, glaring murder at the doctor.

"No?  Well, then lad, out of our way!"  Gently but firmly Duo and his companion were
shoved away from the more interesting machine by the short scientists, now dedicating their
full attention to Deathscythe.

"At least try to *fix* it will ya?"  Duo sighed, resigned to letting the swarm inspect his pride
and joy.  If they so much as ruined the paint job....

"Welcome, strangers."

"I know that voice," Wu Fei murmured thoughtfully in Duo's ear as they turned to face the
feminine voice that had greeted them.  "It's that woman."

Sure enough, Lieutenant Noin stood before them, draped in a flowing pink dress with
sparkles shimmering about it.  Her smile appeared to be genuine enough, though the wand
she cradled closely resembled a gun.  She curtsied politely to them, introducing herself.  "I
am the Good Witch Noin from the North, great Sorcerer.  You have rid the inhabitants of
this village from their evil dictator, the Evil Witch of the East."

"I have?" Duo asked, scratching his head.  "I don't remember killing any girls."

"Your Machine did it."  Noin gestured towards Deathscythe with her wand/gun.  "She was
making a  proclimation for no more scientific experiments when it fell out of the sky,
smashing her to bits.  The doctors are very greatful to you."  Noin frowned as the scientists
ignored her, all poking at the Great Machine From the Sky.  "Hey!  Show your appreciation
towards the great Sorcerer!"  A huge ball of light blasted out from her gun/wand, frying a
good number of the diminuitive Doctors.

Those that were left studied their smoking comrades a moment before quickly scurrying over
to Duo to show their appreciation.  Dr. J was elected as the spokesdoctor, having been
shoved to the front of the group in the hopes that he would be the next to go.  He held out his
mechanical arm towards Duo, lips pulled back into a forced rictus, forcing a "Thank you
very much, lad."
through his teeth.

Duo eyed the three pronged hand with sharp needle points on the fingers, ignoring Wu Fei's
prompting to take it and shake like a proper man.  "You're welcome," he answered, bowing.

"Is there anything else, Great Sorcerer?" Noin asked, pleased that the Doctors had finally
recognized the great power that had been brought to their land.

Duo blinked. Having been hurtled into another dimension (which vaguely resembled a story
he had read) where the inhabitants were Doctors, Noin wore glamorous dresses, and Wu Fei
was the size of his hand, Duo responded with the only appropriate line.

"Have you got anything to eat?  I'm starving!"