Summary: Michael sends Ben on an adventure and a trip down memory lane, for his 40th birthday.
Rating: G
Archive Date: 19 April 2006
Notes: Spoilers for Seasons 2 to 5. This story was inspired by my real-life 40th birthday adventure, planned by my husband.
Classes ended early for Ben on Friday, so after his last class he headed back to his office to tie up some loose ends then head home for the day. Michael hadn't said anything about the fact that today was Ben's 40th birthday, so he figured something was up, but he didn't want to ruin whatever surprise his husband had planned. When he opened his office door, his suspicions were confirmed when he saw a dozen red roses in a beautiful vase on his desk. Ben smiled, loving the fact that Michael was such a romantic, and had probably been planning something for this day for months, no matter how hard Ben tried to get him to live in the now.
There was a card propped up against the vase, so Ben opened it to read what it said. It was a cute 40th birthday card that suggested that the best years were yet to come. There was also a small piece of paper folded up in the middle of the card. Ben leaned against the desk and read what Michael had written:
"How can I make this time of telling special
When I tell you that I love you every day?"Ben, I know that right now you are torn between feeling excited to celebrate this milestone and frustrated that you can never seem to get me to live in the "now," but I just couldn't help myself. To have had so many wonderful years with you has been better than any dreams I may have had when I was younger. I love you so much, and I'm thrilled that you're still here to celebrate your 40th birthday with me. Past birthdays haven't been great, but I promise that this one will be an adventure worthy of the importance of this day.
To start your adventure, go back to where it all began.
Love, Michael
Ben's smile got even bigger as he started to anticipate what the rest of his afternoon might hold. Locking up his office, he followed Michael's clue to the front door of Red Cape Comics, the place where he and Michael first met. He allowed himself to think back to that fateful day; he just wanted to get some comic books to use in a lecture to his students. He had no idea that he would meet the man he'd been searching for his whole life, the man he would eventually marry during a trip to Toronto for the Liberty Ride.
As he opened the door, he wasn't surprised to find that Michael was not there - the adventure certainly wouldn't be over that quickly. Michael's store had done so well recently that he was able to hire an assistant, a young man named Terry who shared his enthusiasm for comic books. Terry looked up as Ben walked in, and got a huge grin on his face.
Ben walked up to the counter and asked, "Do you have something for me?"
Terry smiled, and handed over a folded piece of paper. "Happy 40th Birthday, Dude."
Ben thanked him, and then started reading the next part of his adventure:
"How can I tell you that you are my angel
When you know you are my angel anyway?"I can remember so clearly the day that you first came into the store. Vic, Emmett and I were playing "Yea or nay" as we watched you look over several comics. I think the vote was 2-1 "yea"; Emmett was initially distracted by your shoes. Little did I know that you were the angel that would make my life so wonderfully complete.
Next, go to the place where you are always considered one of the family.
Love, Michael
Debbie's house, Michael's childhood home. Ben again allowed himself to think back to the many visits to that house. From that fateful first visit when Michael stood up to his mother about Ben's HIV-positive status to all of the holiday gatherings where the house was filled with love and laughter, and all of the visits in-between. He was grateful that Debbie was able to see how much he cared for Michael, loved him so deeply, that she accepted him into their family with open arms, despite her earlier reservations. And now that she and Carl were living together, she had finally found someone to share her life with. It was so sweet of her to refuse to get married until he and Michael could be married, legally, in the U.S. Such a small gesture for woman with such a large presence, it humbled him more than she would ever know.
Deb was watching for him through the front window, and threw open the door as he came up the walk. "Happy Birthday, Baby!" she exclaimed, planting a huge kiss on both of his cheeks, leaving tell-tale marks from her bright red lipstick.
He returned her embrace warmly, chuckling as she tried to remove the lipstick marks from his face. As they came into the living room, Carl stood up and started to shake Ben's hand, then said, "What the hell" and gave him a big hug as well. "Happy Birthday, Ben," was all he said.
"Thanks Carl," Ben replied. "Debbie, I want to say 'thank you' for all the love you've shown me through the years. I know that you had your reservations about my relationship with Michael, but I'm so thankful to have been accepted into your family. You all mean the world to me."
"Oh Ben, stop, you're gonna make me cry," Debbie said, tears already forming in her eyes. She thrust Michael's next note into his hands, then turned to Carl's comforting arms.
"I love you more on this, your day of birth,
Than on the day we married, long ago."I know that your first visit to my mom's house was tough, but you gave me the strength to stand my ground when it came to our relationship. I loved you so much, even back then, and that was just what I needed that day. Trust me when I say that even if you and I hadn't worked out, she wouldn't love you any less than she does now. All I ask is that if you tell "horrible mother-in-law" stories, don't tell me about them!
Now use your "loft-y" intelligence and see the man that stood up for me at our wedding
Love, Michael
Brian. If he ever tried to explain Brian's position in their relationship to a total stranger, he would certainly fail miserably. How do you explain that your husband totally and completely loved another man, and that man totally and completely loved your husband, but you were never threatened by those emotions? Brian and Mikey, a love for the ages. Brian knew when to push Michael, and when to hold back, and when to just be there for him. His own encounter with Brian at the White Party so many years ago could have been fatal to his relationship with Michael, but it had provided them with the opportunity to create an even stronger foundation on which to build their future together.
He knocked on the sliding door to Brian's loft, which opened quickly to reveal his husband's best friend. "Hey, Professor," Brian said, as he ushered Ben into the loft.
"Hey, Brian," Ben replied.
Brian walked over to the coffee table to pick up Ben's next clue, and started to hand it to Ben, but he hesitated just a moment. "I don't normally 'do' birthdays, but this was important to Mikey, so I figured I'd play along for his sake." Ben nodded, understanding the sacrifice Brian was making. As Brian handed him the note, he leaned in and kissed Ben full on the lips, letting them linger for just a couple of seconds, before pulling away. "Happy Birthday, Ben," he said quietly, without a trace of sarcasm.
Ben was stunned at the unexpected show of affection on Brian's part; he just stood there in silence. Brian reverted quickly enough, saying, "Well, it's been fun, but I have places to go..."
"...and people to do." Ben knew Michael's part in this little ritual, and fell in place easily enough. He smiled, realizing that Brian's normal air of nonchalance would return quickly. He headed for the door, pausing just long enough to say, "Thank you, Brian."
As Ben exited Brian's building, he opened the latest note.
"Like a tree each year in height and girth,
My love has grown immense, though still and slow."I hope Brian wasn't completely rude to you. Have I told you recently how much I love you? And how much I love the fact that you understand my relationship with Brian, even helping to repair it when it looked like it was going to completely fall apart? You are both so incredibly important to me, I'm so thankful that I have you both to keep me grounded.
Your next stop is the place where you can build muscles in a healthy manner.
Love, Michael
What had he been thinking when he started using steroids? Granted, Paul's death shook him more than he ever expected, but steroids were not the answer. He should have known better. He started to shake when he thought about the possibility that he could have physically hurt Michael during that time. He did hurt him emotionally, though, and the image of Michael’s face when he threatened to jab himself with one of his used syringes was burned in his mind forever. It was a reminder to never allow fear to control his actions ever again.
At the front desk of the gym, the attendant handed Ben the next note. Ben opened it, and read:
"But each time our eyes join instead of meet,
It's as though the lights of stars and sun
Join in me, a burst so bright and sweet,
It couldn't be contained by anyone."Ben, please don't spend a lot of time thinking about your steroid use, that's not why I brought you here. We've had such good times here, whether it's lifting weights, training for the Liberty Ride, or just hanging out with the guys. As always, I'm grateful for your current good health, and this place has a lot to do with that.
Love, Michael
Attached to the bottom of the note was a business card for someplace called "Rivers Lodge," a place Ben had never heard of. As he worked his way toward the address shown on the card, he had the feeling that his adventure was about to end. He couldn't wait to see Michael to begin the real celebration.
At the front desk of Rivers Lodge, he found one last note waiting for him.
"How can I make this time of telling special
When I tell you that I love you every day?
How can I tell you that you are my angel
When you know you are my angel anyway?
I love you more on this, your day of birth,
Than on the day we married, long ago.
Like a tree each year in height and girth,
My love has grown immense, though still and slow.
But each time our eyes join instead of meet,
It's as though the lights of stars and sun
Join in me, a burst so bright and sweet,
It couldn't be contained by anyone.
And so as poetry it flows to you
That I may words with all my love imbue."--Nicholas Gordon
Room 235
Ben raced up the stairs to find the designated room. He saw that the "Do Not Disturb" sign was already hanging on the door handle. He knocked on the door, and was greeted by the love of his life, who was wearing just a robe provided by the hotel. Ben moved quickly into the room and gathered Michael into his arms for a kiss that spoke volumes about their relationship, and the feelings brought up by his adventure. He took note of the fact that Michael had thought ahead to order room service, so there would be no need to leave the room for a long, long time.
As they broke off the kiss to come up for air, Michael whispered "Happy Birthday," in Ben's ear. As the door closed behind them, Michael said, "I do think you are way overdressed for the festivities, though," and started to help Ben out of his clothes.
End of "Ben's 40th Birthday Adventure" by Kirsten (eli_ollie@yahoo.com)