Ben and Michael remember their lives together. Sequel to The Twins Go To School. 12,400 words.
One night as Ben and Michael sat on the sofa wrapped up in each other's loving arms. Michael was deep in thought just remembering the wonderful events from the last four years of their lives.
Ben noticed the thoughtful mood his lover was in as he inquired, "Baby, you are way to quiet tonight. I tend to worry about you when you get in this kind of mood. Do you want to talk to me about anything? We have time Angie and Bobby along with Danielle are all settled into bed sound asleep. Please Michael talk to me."
With tears welling up in Michael's eyes and a lump in his throat he tried to answer but couldn't. Michael pulled Ben's arms even tighter around himself and buried his face in his lover's chest trying to hide his tears from his husband's sight.
Without even looking, Ben automatically knew what was going on, so he quietly held Michael in his arms until his husband could regain his composure. All Ben said, as he continued holding his lover close, "It's okay Baby, take all the time you need. We won't move until you are totally ready and when you are, you can tell me what you're thinking about." Ben kissed the top of Michael's head as he cradled his husband lovingly in his arms.
Michael looked up into his husband's cool blue eyes, kissed his lips and whispered, "Thank you, Sweetheart, I'm fine now. I've been sitting here giving thanks for all the wonderful people in my life and how grateful I am for all the positive events that we have experienced during the last four years."
Ben tenderly returned his husband's kiss and replied. "I agree. I tend to think about our wonderful life together sometimes when I'm falling asleep. We have been so lucky to have our children and each other. The love we have for one another and the children grows everyday."
Michael leaned back in his husband's embrace before he spoke. "Sweetheart, we were doubly blessed when Angie and Bobby came to join our family. I have loved them from the moment we brought them home from the hospital eight years ago. Boy, did we have our hands full those first two to four years." Michael sighed as he kissed his husband then continued. "We've learned so much from the twins. Everything they went through was a new challenge for the two of us. Then when they went to school I thought I had lost them forever."
Ben gave Michael a loving squeeze and whispered, "I know, Baby, I was so concerned about you during those first few months. You didn't even want to go to the store but little by little you got better as the twins showed us both they still needed us."
Michael looked lovingly into Ben's beautiful blue eyes and smiled as he spoke, "I know everyday brought a new problem or experience into our lives. We solved each thing one at a time and we learned from them too. Now look at them, the twins are in the third grade and they are both so smart. You know, Ben, you've had a lot to do with that part of their development. I love the way you love the kids, you are such a great dad. Your patience with each one of them is so amazing."
Ben chimed in as he nuzzled Michael's neck, "But Baby, you are the caregiver of this family. You take the children's needs and put them first. They love you very much and they always know you're going to be there for them. Soon Bobby will probably start playing baseball, soccer and basketball, so I'm wondering are you going to be a coach or a cheerleader?"
Michael laughed out loud, "Oh you'd better get me the pom-poms. You know I've never played any sports. You're going to have to coach their teams. You played football, basketball, baseball and soccer. You can do it all. God, I do love you so!!"
Ben suggested as he sat up and kissed Michael, again on the neck. "Come on Baby, let's go upstairs and relax. Tomorrow is Saturday and we want to spend all day with Angie, Bobby and Danielle. First I want to check in on the kids and make sure they are okay. Please Michael will you come with me?"
Michael took Ben by the hand and led the way upstairs to make sure their kids were asleep. With so much love Ben put his arms around Michael's waist, picked him up and carried his husband up the stairs. Michael put his arms around Ben's neck and kissed his husband tenderly as they got to the top of the stairs. Not a word was spoken because there was never a need for words between Michael and Ben at certain moments like this. Their love was always unspoken but yet always understood.
Ben and Michael looked in on Angie, Bobby and Danielle and found they were all sleeping like little lambs. Ben looked at his husband and just smiled as he whispered, "Baby, I feel so very blessed to have such a great and wonderful family. You are all my life and I don't know what I'd do without you beside me. I don't think I could have survived these last four years alone."
Michael put his finger to Ben's lips so he couldn't speak, "Sweetheart, you'll never be alone and what do you mean, you couldn't have survived? We were always with you, through everything." Michael gently kissed his husband's lips then suggested, "I tell you what, I want us to go and take a relaxing shower then we can decide what to do next." Michael winked at his partner but his meaning was perfectly clear.
Michael again took Ben by the hand and led the way to their bathroom. As he took Ben's face into his hands Michael kissed his lover's face all over and whispered, "Sweetheart, why don't you turn on the shower after which I want to make love to my wonderful husband. I want to always be able to show you just how much I love you." Michael kissed Ben's cheek again then continued, "I still remember the first time ever I saw you. I had just opened my shop and you came in looking for research material for your class. I fell in love with you that very day and after overcoming a slight scare I haven't been without you in my life. My most wonderful and beautiful husband, I love you with all of my heart."
With tears in his eyes Ben took Michael into his arms and kissed him tenderly yet passionately. They decided to forego the shower, as they went to their bedroom, Ben picked his husband up and placed him on their bed. As he climbed up beside his lover, Ben scooped Michael into his arms and began helping his lover out of his clothes. After taking his own clothes off Ben began making passionate love to the man he cherished with all of his heart.
Finally Ben collapsed from sheer exhaustion and taking Michael in his warm embrace he said, "You are the love of my life. You've helped me through so many things. I remember the first time I had trouble with my HIV meds. I had yelled at you at the surprise birthday party you gave me. You were so hurt until you found out why, but you never left me. Then, when I was so sick in the hospital from the reaction I had to my meds, I probably would have died then, if you had not bullied the nurse when she tried to give me the HIV meds again." Ben kissed his lover tenderly on his lips then continued, "Baby, you've been with me through everything. You saw the danger had I put myself in when I got involved with the steroids. I was in such a panic after Paul died. I couldn't think straight at that point in time but you stood firm and brought me back to my senses. Baby, you have been my rock and strength every time I've gone through my episodes and you have always brought me back." Ben couldn't control his emotions any longer as he wept in Michael's arms. He couldn't speak for the longest time. Ben realized at that moment how important Michael was in his life. Gradually Ben fell asleep as Michael held him close yet lovingly in his arms all night.
Michael watched over his husband until he couldn't stay awake any longer. As Michael fell asleep he went back four years as he remembered some of the wonderful events in their life.
"Michael are you sure you want to have another child? Angie and Bobby have just started their first year in preschool, don't you want to have more time for yourself?" Ben asked his husband as they cuddled in each other's arms one night after putting the twins to bed.
Michael reached up kissed the man he loved and replied, "Sweetheart, I feel lost without Angie and Bobby here with me. I know they are growing up and they need to have their own independence but I love being a stay at home dad. I want us to have another child, please. I need this, can you understand how I feel?"
Ben smiled down at his loving husband and kissed him tenderly then whispered, "Yes Baby, I totally understand. If this will make you happy I'll call Melanie and get the process started. What do you think about the idea of using a surrogate this time? You will be his or her father legally and I can adopt the baby a month or so later. Melanie will know the best way to handle it though."
Michael gazed into Ben's loving blue eyes then replied in fright. "But Ben, I had so much trouble the last time when I tried to help father Jenny Rebecca remember? What if it happens again? I'd be mortified."
Ben laughed out loud and said, "Baby, you'll have no problem this time, I'll help you. It can be loads of fun. Let me talk to Melanie first and see if we can find a surrogate before you start panicking okay. Now come here we can start practicing for the big day. You know practice makes perfect."
Ben leaned down and kissed Michael tenderly on his lips. As his passion grew for his husband, Ben made love to Michael several times during the night until he collapsed from sheer exhaustion. Scooping his lover into his arms, Ben fell asleep with a smile on his face and so much love in his heart. Ben along with Michael realized how lucky they both were that they had found each other.
Michael remembered when they had met and rescued Hunter. Ben and Michael knew they were meant to bring this young man into their family. Then next they adopted the twins and their family was complete until now. Now Michael and Ben wanted another child. Ben slept peacefully that night knowing how much love he had for his family. By the same token Ben knew how much he was truly loved by his family.
Ben went to see Melanie the next Monday and asked, "Melanie, can you help us find a surrogate? We want to have another baby. Michael doesn't know what to do with his time all day now that Angie and Bobby are in school. He has so much love to give another child we both do really. Will you help us again?"
Melanie smiled and answered, "Leave it to me. I'll do some research and let you know when I find someone. It may take a little time but I'll make it happen for you and Michael. You are wonderful fathers to Hunter, Angie, Bobby and Jenny Rebecca." Ben looked at Melanie in confusion. Then Melanie continued, "Ben, you are Jenny Rebecca's dad too. She loves you so much. I know you are ready to have another baby. Give me some time and I'll call you soon."
"Thank you Melanie, we love Lindsay, Gus, Jenny Rebecca and you so very much. You are all part of our family, you know that don't you?" Ben said as he gave Melanie a hug goodbye.
Ben and Michael settled into a routine of making sure Angie and Bobby got to and from school everyday. Ben always made sure the twins did their homework but most important he always explained everything so they could really understand each subject.
One night before Angie and Bobby got ready for bed, Ben and Michael asked the twins to sit down. Ben spoke first, "Kids, Papa and I want to talk to you about something important."
Angie answered as she gave her Daddy a puzzled look. "Daddy, what's going on? We haven't made you mad, have we?"
Ben took his daughter into his lap, gave her a hug and kiss then replied, "No Angie, Bobby and you have done nothing wrong. Papa and I have made a decision and we want to know how you feel about it."
Bobby chimed in, "Daddy, tell us what is going on. We always know you do the right things for us. If we haven't done anything wrong, what are you trying to tell us?"
Michael gave Ben a glance then spoke, "Kids, you know how much I miss you two while you are at school don't you? Your Daddy goes and teaches his students everyday but I tend to feel lost while you are at school."
Angie went over to her Papa and put her arms around his neck and whispered, "I love you Papa. Do you really miss us that much?"
Michael gave his daughter a kiss on her cheek and replied. "Yes Angel, I do. That is why Daddy and I want to have another baby."
Bobby looked confused then asked, "Papa how can you have a baby? Can you actually carry one now?"
Ben laughed out loud and replied, "Bobby, your Papa can't carry a baby. We want to ask a nice woman to help us have a baby. She would carry the baby for us then when the baby is born she would let us raise it. Do you understand what I am talking about?"
The twins looked at each other then back at their dads. Bobby replied, "We're not sure. Do you mean like when you got us?"
Michael smiled then answered, "Bobby, in a way it would be just like that. The only difference is we would ask a woman to help us have a baby. I would help father the baby, just the way I helped Aunt Melanie have Jenny Rebecca."
Angie smiled and gave her Papa another kiss, "I think I understand now. Will the baby be a boy or a girl?"
Ben smiled and answered, "We won't know until the baby is born. Papa and I want to know how you fell about this."
Angie answered as she glanced at her two dads. "You mean if we didn't want it you wouldn't have another baby?"
Ben and Michael gave each other a worried glance as Michael spoke, "Your Daddy and I have decided to have another baby but we want you to be happy about it. Angie, you told me not long ago you wanted to be a big sister like Jenny Rebecca. Don't you still want that?"
Angie laughed out loud and said, "Papa, I'm just joking, of course we want you to have another baby. We want to be a big brother and sister. When will we have the baby?"
Ben took Angie in his arms and said, "You little stinker, you scared your Papa to death. We're glad you're okay with this. Now as for when, we don't know yet. Your Aunt Melanie is trying to find a nice lady to help us. We'll let you know as soon as we find out who is willing to help us." Ben hugged his daughter while Michael grabbed Bobby and did the same. They all sat on the sofa for the longest time and just laughed.
"Okay you two it's time for bed. Daddy and I will come up and tuck you in bed after you brush your teeth. Now off you go." Michael gave Angie and Bobby a big kiss as they ran upstairs to get ready for bed.
Ben took his husband into his arms and sighed, "Baby, I thought we were done for, just then. Our children are little devils sometimes." Ben kissed Michael then continued, "It looks like we have their approval now all we have to do is wait for Melanie to find us a surrogate. Are you ready?"
Michael turned pale and took a deep breath then answered, "Ben do you promise you're going to help me? I don't think I can do this without you being there for me this time." Michael put his arms around Ben's waist and held him close then suggested. "I know, why don't we practice some more tonight?"
Ben kissed the man he loved and whispered, "Baby, I'm prepared to practice as often as you need me too. I told you we'd have lots of fun with this."
Michael returned his husband's kiss and replied, "Okay bring it on, I'm ready. Now we have two children waiting for us to put them to bed." Michael gazed into his husband's eyes then continued, "I love you Benjamin Bruckner, you and the children are my life. Thank you for loving me."
Ben nuzzled Michael's neck and questioned, "Why on earth wouldn't I love you? You have given me love, you have protected me and you have always known what's best for me. Please never doubt why I love you again. It is as natural for me as breathing, to love you the way I do." Ben kissed his lover to prevent him from saying anything else except for a passionate sigh. Ben continued, "Now Angie and Bobby are waiting. Let's go kiss our kids goodnight. "
Michael put his arms around his husband's neck and replied, "Ben the twins can wait a few minutes. Would you please just hold me close, I need to feel your loving strength and support right now. When I get scared I need you even more."
Ben gave Michael a confused look then asked. "Baby, why are you scared? You have been the strong and supportive half of this marriage. When I've been either ill, acted stupid or been careless with my health, you have put your foot down. Sometimes your foot has come down very close to me throat and you have always snapped me back to my senses. So please tell me what has you so scared."
Michael looked into Ben's cool blue eyes and confessed. "I am afraid I won't be able to complete the task this time. If we have to, can we just adopt another child? Would you be very disappointed in me if we had to adopt again?"
Ben pulled his loving partner into his arms and whispered, "Baby, it doesn't matter to me if we adopt or use a surrogate. We will love this child as much as we do Angie, Bobby and Hunter. The love we have to give another child is abundant. Please Baby, don't over think this, just relax and let me help you for once. Okay?"
Michael gave Ben a tender kiss and sighed, "Okay, I'll put myself into you loving and capable hands. What ever happens we are in this together, right?"
As he returned his lover's kiss Ben replied, "Yes we are in this together but I'm not worried, so neither should you. Now our children are watching us from the stairs. We need to go and put them to bed then I'll put you to bed after we have another practice session."
Ben and Michael got to the bottom of the stairs just in time to see the twins running into their room laughing. Michael gave Ben a loving glance and asked, "What on earth are they laughing about? I wonder if they heard what we were talking about? I'll get them good if they were."
Ben put his finger to Michael's lips and spoke in a whisper, "Hush Baby, don't say another word. Let's just go and tuck them into bed then we'll have our time together okay!"
All Michael could do at that point was to nod in agreement with his husband and kiss his lips tenderly as they walked upstairs arm in arm. After getting Angie and Bobby settled in bed, Ben and Michael went to their bedroom and made love several times until they both collapsed from sheer exhaustion. Their love was so pure for each other that it overflowed in an abundant amount enough for their children. Michael slept peacefully that night in the knowledge of Ben's love for the children and himself. He knew Ben would never leave them alone and he had his husband for life.
Two months later Melanie called Ben at his office and asked, "Ben, can you and Michael come to my office tomorrow at around 2:00 o'clock? I think I have found someone who is willing to help you have another baby."
Ben replied with excitement, "We'll be there but we will need to be through in time to go and pick Angie and Bobby up after school."
Melanie made a suggestion, "Why don't you let Lindsay pick them up tomorrow. It may take longer than an hour to settle everything legally. She can take them to our house and after we finish you can come over and we'll fix dinner for all of us. How does that sound?"
Ben replied, "That sounds like a plan. Michael and I will see you at your office a little before 2:00 p.m."
After Ben hung up the phone with Melanie, he called Michael. "Baby, Melanie just called me with a time to come to her office. Can you be free tomorrow at 2:00 p.m.?"
Michael took a deep breath and answered, "Yes Sweetheart, I'll ask my assistant Steven to watch the shop for me. Did Melanie say who she found to be our surrogate?"
Ben calmly answered, "No Baby, all she said was she thought she had found someone who was interested in helping us have another baby. Let's just go to her office tomorrow afternoon and see whom she has found. I trust Melanie, she has never let us down yet."
Michael sighed, "Okay, Sweetheart, but I'm going to have trouble being patient about this tonight. Do you think you can help distract me later this evening?"
Ben smiled to himself and replied, "I wish I were with you right now, Baby. I'd start distracting you immediately if I could. Now I will be home with the twins at 3:30 p.m. so I'll see you then. You have a huge hug and kiss coming."
Michael laughed out loud and replied, "You've got a deal big guy. I will be looking forward to seeing you and the children at 3:30 p.m."
Michael arrived home thirty minutes before his husband and children were due to get home. As he waited Michael became very anxious about the next day. He began worrying about what his roll was in this process. So by the time Ben and the twins got home Michael had worked himself into a state of anxiety to the point that he had trouble sitting still.
As Ben walked through the front door he saw his husband's state of mind. He walked over to Michael, took his husband into his arms and whispered, "Baby, please you need to relax. What started this panic attack? Surely you're not doubting yourself again."
Michael tried taking slow deep breaths before he could speak. "Ben, I'm so nervous and anxious about this process. All I can think about is my failure to perform when Melanie was trying to have Jenny Rebecca. I just can't get it out of my mind." Michael put his arms around his husband's waist and buried his face into Ben's broad chest.
Ben tenderly held his lover in his arms as he allowed Michael to slowly relax then he whispered, "Baby, I wish I could help you be calmer regarding this subject." Ben gave his husband a kiss on his neck they continued, "Michael, Baby, if I could be the sperm donor I would but my HIV status prevents me from fathering a child. I'm sorry Baby, but you have to be the father. Remember you won't be alone this time, I'm going to help you in anyway I can. Please Michael let's see what Melanie has to say then we'll take it one step at a time."
Michael found himself slowly pulled into a loving and tender kiss before he could finally speak. "Okay, Sweetheart, I'll try but I may not want to leave your side until we have achieved our goal. Now did you say anything to Angie and Bobby about this yet?"
Ben gave his partner a loving squeeze and said, "Not yet. I thought we should find out what, or should I say whom, Melanie has found for us before we say anything to the twins. Now let's get back to our normal routine and everything will work out the way it should." Ben gave Michael another loving kiss as they went to help Angie and Bobby with their homework.
Ben and Michael fixed dinner for the twins and spent quality time with Angie and Bobby before they went to bed. Ben watched his husband very closely that night to make sure Michael was staying relaxed.
Ben suggested to the twins, "Angie and Bobby, it's time to get ready for bed. Tomorrow your Aunt Lindsay is going to pick you up after school and take you over to their house so you can spend time with Jenny Rebecca. Papa and I will come over tomorrow evening and we'll all eat dinner together then we'll come home."
Angie spoke up, "That will be fun, but why is Aunt Lindsay picking us up? Are Papa and you going somewhere tomorrow?"
Ben glanced at Michael before he spoke, "Kids, Aunt Melanie wants us to meet her at her office at 2:00 o'clock. We didn't want to say anything to you about it until we had all the facts but it looks like Aunt Melanie has found a woman who wants to help us have another baby. We'll be able to tell you more about it and her tomorrow night okay."
"Okay Daddy. I'm getting so excited about being a big sister." Angie said as she climbed into her daddy's lap and gave him a kiss on his cheek.
Ben put his arms around his daughter's waist and returned her kiss then said, "I'm glad you are excited, now it's time for bed. Run up and brush your teeth, Papa and I will come up and tuck you into bed in about twenty minutes."
Ben and Michael kissed their children as they sent them off to bed. Ben turned to Michael and whispered, "Baby, are you okay now? I don't want you getting so upset. Now let's sit here for awhile before we go upstairs to the kids." Ben put his arms around Michael's waist and held him tenderly yet lovingly until he realized his husband was totally relaxed again.
Ben and Michael went upstairs and put Angie and Bobby to bed. After they left the twins' room and closed the door, Ben picked his partner up into his arms then carried Michael into their bedroom.
Michael smiled at his husband as he spoke, "Sweetheart, make love to me. Please, I need to feel your loving and tender touch tonight. You always help me relax and I need that NOW."
Ben kissed Michael tenderly on his lips, then his neck and whispered, "I'll be glad to fulfill you request. I will make sure you are relaxed tonight if that is really what you want." Ben held his husband tenderly in his arms as he placed Michael on their bed then climbed up beside his lover. As he took his husband's face into his hands, Ben kissed Michael tenderly again on the lips.
Michael gazed into his partner's cool blue eyes and whispered, "Ben, I hope you know just how much I truly love you. I do feel calm when I'm in your arms and you are making love to me so completely. I need you tonight with all that I am." Michael reached up and caught his husband in a passionate kiss as he began helping Ben out of his shirt.
Ben scooped his husband into his warm embrace and returned Michael's kiss. Their kiss was so passionate that it took their breath away causing Ben to whimper as they separated to take a deep breath. Ben whispered into his husband's ear, "Baby, you are the love of my life. I don't know where I'd be today if I had not found you when I did. Michael, I do love you with my whole heart and I always want to make you happy."
Michael couldn't speak so he put his arms around Ben's neck and pulled his husband even closer as he continued to help Ben out of the rest of his clothes. With this Ben returned the favor until he lay next to his husband totally naked.
Nuzzling his husband's sensitive spot Ben tenderly began making love to the man he cherished most in the world. Michael melted into his lover's embrace and surrendered to his loving touch. After they both had achieved their climaxes Ben and Michael collapsed into each other's arms from sheer exhaustion. As he pulled Michael even closer to his warm moist body, Ben whispered, "I hope I fulfilled your request tonight? You seem more relaxed now. How do you feel Baby?"
Michael was at a lose for words at that moment all he was able to whisper, "Thank you Sweetheart. You always fulfill my needs and I love you so very much."
At this words were no longer needed. Ben held his husband tenderly in his arms until he was sure Michael had fallen asleep. Ben watched over his lover until he himself fell asleep. They both slept peacefully in the loving arms of each other and as always they knew how much they were totally loved.
The next day Ben and Michael, once again, found themselves nervously waiting outside Melanie's office door. Michael grabbed his husband's hand and nearly broke it from squeezing too hard. Ben gave Michael a look of pain and suggested, "Baby, please I need this hand. I want you to take a deep breath and relax. We have been through this before remember and look at the wonderful children we got to love. Don't you think we can be just as lucky and blessed this time?"
Michael smiled at his husband and did what he asked. As he began to relax Melanie appeared. "Boys, I think you will approve of the person I found to be your surrogate."
As Ben and Michael walked into Melanie's office they couldn't believe their eyes. Ben spoke first, "Judy, is that you? Are you willing to help us have another baby?"
Judy walked over to the two men and gave them each a warm hug and kiss then replied. "Melanie called me over a month ago and told me you wanted to have another baby. She said that this time you wanted to use a surrogate. After giving it a lot of thought I called Melanie back and asked if I could be that surrogate."
With tears in his eyes Michael chimed in, "We couldn't have found anyone we care about more to help us have another child, except for maybe Melanie." Michael gave his husband a loving squeeze then continued, "This means Angie and Bobby will truly be the baby's brother and sister, not just a half brother or sister."
Looking at Michael then Judy, Ben finally was able to speak again. "I love the idea of you being our surrogate." Glancing again at his husband Ben continued, "You know, Judy, the twins have asked us questions about you and if it is okay with you, we want you to spend some time with them." Ben gave his husband another glance as Michael nodded in agreement, Ben asked, "Tonight we are all having dinner with Melanie and Lindsay, if it is alright with them why don't you join us and we'll explain everything to Angie and Bobby."
Judy looked at Melanie who agreed, "Judy, please come and join us. We can make it a real celebration."
Michael moved over to Judy and whispered, "Judy, Angie and Bobby need to get to know their mother and I think it is high time they do." With tears in her eyes Judy agreed as the four of them began settling everything legally for the new baby.
As Ben and Michael left Melanie's office Ben declared, "Baby, I feel this is a good sign. We are going to have another beautiful child to love, thanks to Judy."
Michael gazed into his husband's eyes and all he could do was to nod in agreement and smile. For once Michael was left speechless. Ben smiled and took his partner into his arms and just held him close. Nothing more was said for the meaning was crystal clear. They knew everything was going to be okay.
Ben, Michael, Judy and Melanie left the law office at the same time and agreed to meet at Melanie's house an hour later. Judy followed Melanie while Ben and Michael stopped at the diner to talk to Debbie.
As the boys walked into the Liberty Diner to look for Michael's mother, they saw the whole gang sitting there waiting for their good news. Ben looked over at his husband, put his arms around Michael's waist and said with a smile, "You couldn't wait until we had things settled before telling all of our friends, could you? Or do we have your mother to thank for this gathering?"
Michael reached up, kissed his husband, then smiled sheepishly and replied. "I only told mom about our decision to find a surrogate. I have no control over what she says or whom she tells. Ben, please control your anger."
Ben gave Michael a loving squeeze and whispered, "I'm not angry. Your mom actually did us a big favor this time. Now we only have to tell everyone one time and that will be the end of it." Ben pulled his husband closer and kissed him tenderly.
Brian as usual spoke first, "Okay you two tell us what's going on. Don't tell me there is going to be another Novotny-Bruckner running around soon. Where have all the queers gone?"
Michael gave Brian a stare that meant 'can it Brian' and the message was received loud and clear. Michael spoke to Emmett, Drew, Ted, Blake and Justin. "Melanie has found someone to be our surrogate. It is Judy Thompson, the twins' mother. She decided to help us have another child."
Emmett as usual began to cry and Drew had to comfort his husband. Ted spoke up, "I, well I mean we all think that is great. I gather you have worked everything out legally, but what about emotionally? Are you okay with this? The twins are going to ask questions, what are you going to tell them?"
Ben spoke up to silence all of the questions. "Michael and I are telling Angie and Bobby the truth. Not to stop there, we want them to get to know their mother. It is not fair to keep them apart. We'll just invite Judy into our family circle. Angie and Bobby really deserve that love and consideration, don't you think?"
Ted gave a look of disapproval but said nothing. Everyone else crowded around Ben and Michael giving them their love and support. At this Ben and Michael left to join everyone over at Melanie and Lindsay's house.
Angie and Bobby were waiting for their Daddy and Papa to arrive and greeted their dads with a big hug and kiss. Angie asked, "Daddy is this the lady who will help us have a baby?"
Ben glanced at Michael then spoke, "Yes Angie, this is Judy Thompson. She will be our surrogate."
Angie climbed into her daddy's lap and asked in a whisper, "Daddy, did you say Judy Thompson? Do you mean? Are you? Is she our mother?"
Ben held his daughter close yet tenderly in his arms as he replied, "Yes Angel, this is your and Bobby's mother. She came and offered to help us this time and we, your Papa and I, felt it was time you three got to know each other. Angie what do you think about this?"
Angie put her arms around her daddy's neck, kissed him and inquired. "Is she going to try to take us away from you and Papa?"
With a tear in his beautiful blue eyes, Ben answered, "Absolutely not. Bobby and you are ours, your Papa and my, children LEGALLY!!! No one can take you away from us. We just want you two to get to know your biological mother THAT IS ALL!!!"
Bobby came over and chimed in, "Okay but I'm not sure I'm going to like her."
Michael put his arms around his son and replied, "You don't have to become bosom buddies right off the bat. But you can get to know Judy and decide later how you feel about her. She is not expecting anything that you aren't ready to give."
With that nothing more was said as they all enjoyed a pleasant visit and celebrated the beginning of a new child. The twins started out being a little standoffish to Judy but by the end of the evening they had begun to warm up to her. They all had taken a major step that night and Ben, along with Michael, was pleased.
Later that night, after Ben, Michael, Angie and Bobby arrived back at their house, they all sat on the sofa and reflected on what was about to happen.
Angie and Bobby climbed between their Daddy and Papa as they put their arms around their dads' necks. Angie spoke first, "Daddy after the baby is born is Judy I mean Mama, going to live with us?"
Ben was surprised by his daughter's question but seemed to understand as he replied, "Come here Angie. I want Bobby and you to understand something. Judy may be your mother, your biological mother, but Papa and I are you parents and your family. All we want is for the two of you to get to know Judy. She is helping us to have a baby. We're not going to adopt her too but we will not exclude her either. She'll be apart of our extended family like Aunt Lindsay and Aunt Melanie. Do you understand what I'm saying?"
Angie snuggled into her daddy's arms and replied. "Yes Daddy, I understand. I love Papa and you but will you be upset if I learn to love Mama too?"
Ben tenderly hugged his daughter and answered, "No Angel, neither Papa or I will be upset. We really want you to have a good relationship with your Mama. We'll just take it one step at a time for now and see what happens. Okay?"
Bobby spoke up, "Okay, Daddy, we'll take it one step at a time."
Michael reminded the twins, "Angie, you two need to run up and get ready for bed you've had a very busy day today. Now give us a kiss and off you go. Daddy and I will come up to tuck you in later."
After Angie and Bobby disappeared upstairs, Ben put his arms around his husband, held Michael close to his body and whispered, "Well now it begins. I'm glad we're having a child this way this time, plus it will prove that we are in this endeavor together." Ben gave Michael a loving squeeze and whispered again, "Shall we practice some more tonight?"
Michael gazed into his husband's blue eyes, smiled and replied, "Well you did say PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT, didn't you?"
Ben laughed out loud as he gave Michael a tender kiss, "Yes I did say that. Let's put it into action tonight. LET THE FUN BEGIN!!!"
After putting Angie and Bobby into bed, Ben did the same for Michael. As he took his husband by the hand, Ben led the way to their bedroom. Michael pulled his husband into a tender embrace and kissed his lips with such passion that he caused Ben to go weak in the knees for once. As Michael held the man he loved, he started helping Ben out of his shirt and pants. Ben smiled at his partner and returned the favor.
As he held his husband lovingly in his arms Ben kissed Michael's sensitive spot, which caused his husband to giggle out loud and whisper, "Sweetheart, I love when you kiss me there and most of the time I never want you to stop." Michael melted into his husband's arms and continued, "Ben make love to me, I need to have you inside me tonight." Michael kissed his husband again then added, "Once again I'm getting so nervous. I realize you're going to help me but you know me, I tend to blow everything out of proportion."
Ben scooped his husband into his arms and replied, "Baby, I'll be with you every step of the way this time. You will have my moral support to get you through this I promise. I just wish you'd stop over thinking everything. It will work out the way it is suppose too. Now come here and relax in my arms and I'll make love to the man I cherish totally and completely."
With that words were no longer needed as Ben made love to the man he adored more than life itself. Michael surrendered to his husband's loving touch and melted into Ben's warm embrace. After making passionate love to his husband several times, Ben collapsed beside Michael from sheer exhaustion. As he looked into Michael's beautiful brown eyes and kissed his lips, Ben whispered, "Baby, I love you so much. Do you feel better now?"
Michael spoke quietly, "You are amazing Sweetheart. You always know exactly what I need most when I'm upset. I'll be able to sleep peacefully tonight knowing I'm not alone this time. You may have to remind me every so often but I won't mind that at all."
Ben smiled and kissed his husband saying, "You're most definitely not in this alone. We are a team and I'll never leave you alone. Now snuggle into my arms and let's get some sleep. I love you Baby, please never forget it."
Michael settled into his husband's embrace and slowly fell asleep with a smile on his face. Ben watched over Michael until he was sure his husband was sleeping peacefully before he allowed himself to fall asleep. Ben and Michael slept in each other's arms all night without moving a muscle. The love they shared was comforting yet strong and complete.
Three months later Judy called Ben and Michael one evening after dinner, she asked, "Can I come over and see you tonight? I have some news I want to DELIVER in person."
Ben spoke, barely able to contain his emotions, "Sure come on over Michael and I will be waiting. We'll try and keep the twins awake so you three can visit."
Ben said as he hung up the phone then turned to Michael and took his husband into his arms. "Baby, I think we have a baby on the way. Judy says she has good news but wants to tell us in person. That's the only thing it can be."
Michael buried his face into his husband's chest in order to hide his tears of joy and relief then replied. "Sweetheart, I hope so. The last three months have been tough on me but the fact that you were with me this time made it bearable. Thank you Ben, this time you were my rock and strength."
Ben held Michael tenderly in his arms and kissed his lips. Not a word was spoken, the joy they felt was obvious. They sat quietly on the sofa while they waited for Judy to arrive. The twins got in their pajamas and joined their Daddy and Papa in the living room as they all waited together. The doorbell rang and Michael almost jumped out of his skin. Giving his husband a reassuring glance and kiss, Ben went to answer the door. "Come in Judy. The twins are still awake and I don't think Michael and I can wait any longer. Were we successful?" Ben said as he gave Judy a hug hello.
Judy couldn't contain her excitement as she ran into the living room and said. "Boys, we have a bun in the oven. I just saw my doctor today and he confirmed that I am five weeks pregnant!! He said everything is normal and we, I mean you, should be parents again by Christmas."
Michael finally took a deep breath hugged the twins, kissed his husband, then walked over to Judy and gave her a loving kiss. With tears in his eyes Michael found his voice, "Judy, thank you for what you are doing for us. We love you and want you to be included in our extended family."
Ben scooped Michael into his arms and whispered, "See Baby, that wasn't so bad this time. Now we have a new son or daughter to look forward to bringing home. Wow!! What a great Christmas present he or she will be." Turning to Judy he said, "Thank you Judy. Now make sure you let us know if you need anything at all. We'll go to your doctor visits with you and well just suffice it to say we are in this together."
Angie and Bobby exploded with excitement and hugged both of their dads then they went and spent time with their mother before going upstairs to bed. They finally kissed Judy good-bye and their dads, goodnight.
After Judy left Ben and Michael sat on the sofa in silence. Ben scooped his husband into his loving embrace and just whispered, "Baby, YOU DID IT!!! Mission accomplished."
Michael looked into Ben's cool blue eyes and saw tears. As he wiped his tears away Michael kissed his husband lovingly and tenderly took him into his embrace. Not a word was spoken their happiness said it all.
Ben woke up first the next morning and found his husband sleeping soundly beside him with a smile on his face and tears in his eyes. Ben leaned down and kissed Michael's lips as he gently wiped his husband's tears away. Michael slowly opened his eyes and smiled up at the man he loved. "What's up Sweetheart? You know I love it when I wake up to see your beautiful face watching over me. Come here and kiss me again."
Ben took his husband into his loving embrace and kissed Michael again this time with more passion and whispered, "Baby, are you okay? You were dreaming about something, which caused you to cry in your sleep. Do you want to talk about it?"
Michael curled up in his partner's arms and confessed, "I was dreaming about when Danielle was born. You woke me at the point we learned Judy was pregnant with her."
Ben gave his husband a loving squeeze and remembered, "I know, what a wonderful time that was. I remember the day Danielle was born. It was December 23 and Judy called us to meet her at the hospital."
Michael took a deep breath and added, "I know. It's a good thing we knew what to do this time. After what seemed like two days, but actually was only eight hours, we met our beautiful daughter. As with Angie and Bobby, I fell in love with her immediately. Ben, we do have the most beautiful children don't we?"
Ben smiled and held his husband even closer and agreed. "We are two very lucky dads. Our sweet Christmas present has filled our lives with so much love. You know Michael, I have never seen you so happy as the day, Christmas Day, we brought Danielle home." Ben kissed Michael tenderly on his lips and continued. "The house was filled with warmth and love. My parents had come down from New York to be with us. Your mother and Carl were here and Hunter got home just in time to meet his new sister. Danielle Elizabeth Novotny-Bruckner."
Michael smiled at his husband, returned his kiss and replied. "I know I was so proud to show Danielle off. I was totally surprised when I saw that Hunter had brought a special friend home."
Ben broke in with tears in his eyes and said, "I remember how shocked I was to see Hunter standing there with Callie. Now they are married. Can you believe it? Hunter has grown from that scared hustler we met years ago into a man I'm very proud to call my son."
Michael gave his husband a loving squeeze and added, "I'm proud of Hunter too. The fact that he graduated with honors got his B.S. in Chemical Engineering and his Doctorate in Pharmacology blew me away. Then to land a job with Langley Laboratories and now to be involved with discovering a cure for HIV is so amazing."
Ben could not control his emotions at this point. Michael took notice and just held his husband quietly in his arms. Ben's thoughts took him back to two years before.
Ben came home early from classes that Friday and collapsed on the sofa. Michael saw this, ran to his husband's side and took him into his arms then asked. "Ben what's wrong? You look pale." Michael felt Ben's forehead and added, "Sweetheart you are burning up. I'm calling the doctor and asking him to meet us at the hospital."
Ben was too weak to put up a fight this time and agreed, "Okay Michael, I can't fight this one without help. Make the call."
After getting Judy to take the kids, Michael got his husband to the hospital emergency room. Dr. Todd, the specialist on HIV related illnesses, was waiting for them to arrive. Dr. Todd took charge and got Ben into a room immediately. Michael refused to leave his husband's side even for a minute. Dr. Todd was used to working around Michael so he had no problems on this particular day. The doctor ran the usual tests to determine what was wrong.
Michael looked at his unconscious husband and pleaded, "Dr. Todd, what is causing this? Ben said it came on him very quickly today during his last lecture. Please do something I don't want to lose him. We have fought this fucking HIV for so long. We can't lose now!!!!"
Dr. Todd took Michael aside to calm him down. "Mr. Novotny, please. Ben is in no danger at the moment. First we have to bring his fever down and we'll do that while we wait for the test results to come back. Now go to Ben and stay calm, this way you will help to keep him calm too. Now I need to get to the lab and find out what's causing this okay!!!"
Michael was at a loss and just nodded. After Dr. Todd left, Michael called Hunter and told his son the situation. Hunter spoke calmly, "Papa, I'll come immediately. I will bring what I need and maybe this new drug will help Dad. This treatment has been successful and it has helped me." Hunter cleared his throat then announced, "Papa, I have been cured. I am no longer HIV positive. I'll explain when I get there. Tell Dr. Todd I'm coming and what I'm bringing."
Michael could barely get the words out. "Did you say you have been cured? Please Hunter this is no time for jokes. Are you telling me the truth?"
Hunter took a deep breath and replied, "Papa, I am dead serious. Now I need to get everything together, go home, get Callie and we'll get to Pittsburgh as fast as we can. You stay with Dad and tell him I'm coming."
Michael's head started to spin and tears filled his eyes as he went back into his husband. As he sat beside Ben's bed, Michael held his husband's hand while he lightly and lovingly stroked his cheek, Michael begged, "Sweetheart, please you have to wake up. I need to know you are still here with the children and me. You are my life and I don't know if I can live without you with me." Michael kissed Ben's lips then put his head down on his forearm and quietly wept. A moment later he felt someone stroking his hair, as he looked up he saw the beautiful blue eyes of the man he loved and cherished with his life. "Ben, Sweetheart, you've come back to me, 'Thank you God.' I've been so worried, are you feeling any better?"
Ben looked lovingly into his partner's brown eyes, reached over and wiped the tears from Michael's face. Michael moved closer to his husband's face and kissed Ben's lips tenderly again. He climbed up beside his lover and cradled him in his arms then whispered, "Sweetheart, please don't say anything, just listen. I called Hunter and told him your situation. Hunter and Callie are on their way here now and he is bringing a new treatment he hopes will help you get well."
Ben glanced up at Michael and quietly spoke, "What are you saying Baby? What new treatment?"
Michael put his finger to his husband's lips to keep him from speaking and added, "Hunter said Langley Laboratories has developed a treatment that has cured HIV. Dr. Todd said he had read the reports on this new drug and he understands what is involved. Sweetheart, Hunter has taken the treatment. Ben, he is HIV FREE. I'm supposed to tell you to hang on and get ready to be completely well for good."
With tears welling up in his eyes, Ben grabbed Michael, pulled him close and wept in his husband's arms. At that point words were no longer needed. Michael held his lover closer and allowed him his emotions that night. Ben finally relaxed and fell asleep as Michael continued holding him close.
The nurses and Dr. Todd came in every so often and finally told Michael, "Mr. Novotny, Ben's fever has finally broken. As soon as your son gets here with the treatment we'll be able to start giving it to Ben. Now from what I've read about this new drug, it could take up to three to four weeks before we would see much improvement. We will have enough of an improvement to indicate if it will work for Ben though. Please, Michael, you will need to be very patient and keep a positive attitude for Ben's sake."
Michael took a deep breath to steady his nerves and replied, "If there is a remote chance this treatment will work I will do everything I can to keep us both in a positive frame of mind. Thank you Dr. Todd, Hunter and you are giving me true hope that Ben can finally beat this fucking HIV for good."
Hunter and Callie arrived the next day with the drug that was going to give his Dad, his life back. Callie went to Ben's room to be with Ben and Michael while Hunter rushed off to find Dr. Todd.
Michael took Callie into his arms and said with love. "Callie, I'm so glad you're here. I've been going out of my mind just waiting. Ben has been sleeping most of the time but his fever has broken and he's been resting since last night. I'm grateful but still I'm worried. Callie how long did it take for Hunter to respond to the drug?" Michael gazed into Callie's face for a sign then continued, "I want to know what to expect. It's just that we've lived with this HIV for as long as we've known each other. It is hard for me to even get my hopes up for Ben to be cured."
Callie held her father-in-law in her arms and reassured him, "Papa, don't expect very much at first, Hunter responded more in the third week. I think that was when we were completely sure that the drug was working. Please remember, Hunter and I will stay until Dad goes home. Papa, I won't leave you alone."
Michael wept as he replied, "Callie all those years Hunter and you were apart were wasted. I knew you loved Hunter from the start even after you learned about his HIV. You know Callie you are a female version of me. I loved Ben from the first day I laid eyes on him. I panicked but after coming to my senses I've been with Ben ever since. You know your love for Hunter is just the same."
Callie smiled and said, "I love Dad and you. I feel apart of your family now and I'll always be here for the two of you. Now I want you to go take a walk and get something to eat. I'll look out for Debbie and Carl and fill them in. You need to take a break, I'll be here with Dad until you get back." Callie encouraged Michael to leave then sat down beside her father-in-law and took his hand.
Ben slowly woke to see his daughter-in-law sitting smiling up at him. Ben smiled back and spoke quietly, "Hello my sweet girl. I gather my son is here somewhere working hard."
Callie kissed her Dad and replied, "Well you know your son. He'd do anything for the man who saved his life all those years ago. He is with Dr. Todd and they will be here soon enough to get you started on the treatment."
With tears in his eyes Ben asked, "Callie is it true? Has Hunter been cured?"
Callie squeezed her dad's hand and replied, "Yes Dad, it is true. Hunter wants to explain it to you himself so I'm not going to steal his thunder. Now close your eyes and rest. I sent Papa out to eat and refresh his mind and spirit. Dad don't fight me on this, I always win." Callie and Ben laughed out loud together as Ben relaxed and closed his eyes. Callie reached up and wiped her dad's tears away. She knew he was trying so hard to hide the fact that he was crying. Callie said nothing but continued to hold her father's-in-law hand in loving comfort.
An hour later, after leaving the hospital in order to get some fresh air, Michael met Debbie and Carl as he was re-entering the front door. Michael hugged his mother then said, "Mom, the worst is over, Ben's fever has broken. Please I've worried enough for the both of us, don't add to me fears."
Debbie took her son into her arms and quietly spoke, "Michael, Sweetheart, Carl and I are here to give you our love and support. I took the liberty of calling Sandra and Tom, they are on their way here now."
Michael gave his mother a loving kiss and replied, "Thank you mom. Did you say anything to anyone else? Are we going to be flooded with all of our friends?"
Debbie smiled and replied, "Well I called Brian. I told him the situation and he said I should tell you to call him when you have news to report. Brian will keep everyone informed. Drew said he'd keep Emmett under control and out of your hair."
Michael hugged Debbie again and sighed, "Thank you for all of your help Mom. Listen Hunter and Callie are here. Callie is sitting with Ben now and Hunter is with Dr. Todd. Mom, Hunter brought a drug he says can cure Ben's HIV for good. Mom, he has taken the treatment and says he no longer has HIV. We're going to give the drug to Ben and I pray it works." Michael wept in his mother's arms as Debbie just comforted her son.
Carl spoke up, "Michael that is wonderful news. Now you two need to regain your composure, Callie and Ben shouldn't see you upset. Why don't you take a minute, I'll go on up and see them. Take your time Debbie and help Michael, he needs you right now."
Carl left Debbie and Michael alone to regain their composure so by the time they reached Ben's room they had smiles on their faces. As they entered the room, Debbie saw Ben's face and almost lost her composure again. With a smile on her face she went over to Ben and gave him a loving hug and kiss hello. Debbie took Callie into her arms and gave her a kiss as she whispered, "Callie, I'm glad you came with Hunter. Where is he now? I would have thought he'd come straight to his dad."
Callie broke in to silence her grandmother. "Debbie please, Hunter needed to talk to Dr. Todd about Dad's treatment. They have to decide on the correct dosage so Dad will respond. The fact that his fever has broken means they can start Dad's treatment immediately. Now we all have to be patient."
At that moment Hunter and Dr. Todd entered Ben's room. Hunter greeted his grandmother and Carl after which he put his arms around his Papa and held him close. Hunter whispered, "Papa now we all need to stay calm. Dr. Todd is going to start Dad's first dosage." To everyone else Hunter explained the situation. "Okay, this is what to expect. Dad will be given a dose of this new drug once a day. It is administered by an IV drip. This allows the drug to enter Dad's system slowly. As I told Papa it will take three to four weeks before we'll know if this is going to work, so patience and positive thinking is needed." Turning back to Michael he added, "Papa we'll need to report any reaction Dad may have. You must not panic about what may happen, any reaction is only temporary. Promise you'll stay calm."
Michael replied to his son, "I promise! As long as you'll explain everything so I know what's going on, I can handle it and be strong for your Dad."
As Hunter and Michael finished Ben spoke, "Hi! Son, I'm glad you're here. What's the decision? Are we going to try this new treatment of yours?"
Hunter walked over, took his dad's hand, kissed his cheek and replied. "Dad we've already started. There is no turning back now. Dad, I want you to relax and don't worry about anything, we'll take care of everything. Besides, Papa is doing enough worrying for all of us." The group glanced over at Michael and they all laughed out loud. Even Michael!
Sandra and Tom arrived the next day. They found Ben sitting up and feeling somewhat better. Sandra took her son into her arms and kissed his cheek. "Ben, I've been so worried. Sweetheart, are you any better? Debbie told us what is happening but a mother always seems to worry."
Ben returned his mother's kiss and added, "Well husband's tend to worry a lot too, so join the crowd. Now I am feeling a little better but Hunter says we have a long wait to know if this new drug will work for me. Mom, Hunter has taken this treatment and it worked for him, so that gives me hope." Ben saw a tear roll down his mother's cheek and he reached over to wipe it away. He sat there and just smiled, with this Sandra understood.
Tom came over to his son and gave him a loving hug as he said, "Son are Hunter and Dr. Todd positive about this treatment? It's just that you have, we all have, dealt with this HIV and all of your illnesses for so long. I'm almost afraid to get my hopes up. Is Michael alright with this new drug?"
Ben spoke so he could calm his father's fears, "Dad, Michael, Dr. Todd and I are all on board with this new treatment. Hunter responded to it and he feels I will too. Please, Mom and Dad, I want you to be calm and patient for Michael's sake, he is so sure this will work and I want him to stay positive about this approach. Don't say anything to discourage him. Michael has seen me through so much all these years I want him to be calm during the next three to four weeks. Can you understand?"
Sandra and Tom nodded and replied, "We promise!"
At this Michael walked into the room and greeted Sandra and Tom with a loving hug and kiss then said, "Mom and Dad Bruckner how do you find our patient. Is Ben behaving himself?"
Sandra kissed her son-in-law and replied, "Michael, our son and your husband, has told us what has happened along with what to expect. We are here for Ben and you so tell us what we need to do to help."
Michael suggested, "Mom and Carl are at our house with the children. May I suggest you go over to the house, see the kids and get settled, you can stay in our room. I'll sleep here at the hospital with Ben. If I know that Angie, Bobby, and Danielle are being taken care of I will rest easier."
Tom chimed in, "We'll go over there now. Don't worry you two between the four grandparents, Callie and Judy the children will not be left alone. Now Michael, don't worry, just stay with Ben and give him your love and support." Turning to his wife Tom said, "Now Sandra, we need to go and leave these two alone."
After Sandra and Tom left Michael turned to his husband and kissed him tenderly then whispered, "Ben, Sweetheart, now all we have to do is concentrate on getting you completely well."
Michael climbed up beside his lover and held him close in his arms. Michael leaned down and kissed Ben on the top of his head as tears welled in his eyes. He was grateful his husband couldn't see them but as usual Ben could always tell when his partner was upset and trying to hide the fact. Nothing was said as they held each other for hours.
The weeks past slowly for Michael as he spent every minute he could with the man he loved, watching his every move and reaction. After seeing his husband experience several bad episodes, causing Ben pain and several convulsions Michael was afraid his husband was not improving. Finally he got angry and yelled at Hunter and Dr. Todd. "Do you even know what you are doing? Ben is in pain and three times I thought I had lost him. Now I insist you tell me if this is working or not. I can't stand seeing Ben this way. Is my husband going to survive this treatment? Please, Hunter, tell me the truth is your dad going to live?" Michael broke down and wept as he spoke.
Hunter took Michael by his shoulders and encouraged his father to leave the room. He looked into his father's face and spoke firmly. "Papa, you have to control yourself. I know you are tired and worried but when it comes right down to it Dad is doing better than I expected. Now we need to give the drug another week or so then we will know if Dad will totally respond."
Michael relied as he took a deep breath. "But Hunter, why is he in so much pain. You know I can't stand seeing your Dad sick and in pain. I feel so helpless, I want to make everything better."
Hunter explained Ben's situation. "Papa, Dad's body is starting to fight off the HIV virus on it's on for the first time since he was infected. You see this drug has started to give Dad's white cells a new way to fight off the invaders. I'm sorry that he is in so much pain, but that is part of the process. Papa, believe it or not Dad is responding to the treatment. Please don't give up. Now go back and stay with Dad and don't let him know you are so upset. He needs your love and encouragement, can you do that Papa?"
With a renewed attitude Michael gave his son a hug and said. "Thank you son. I needed to know what was happening. I can deal with anything as long as I understand what's going on."
Hunter left his father with a loving hug and went back to work. Michael went back to his husband with a renewed spirit. As Michael entered the room Ben looked at his husband with a questioned look. "Okay, Baby, why are you so upset?" Ben smiled then continued, "Honey, you have never been able to fool me, I know you too well, talk to me please."
Michael went to his loving husband, climbed up beside him and cradled him in his arms as he whispered. "I was hoping I was hiding my worry and concern better than that. I'm sorry, Sweetheart, it's just that you have been in so much pain since you started this treatment. I've been so afraid that you were getting worse not better. Hunter told me why you are having pain and I understand now. It doesn't mean I like it though."
Ben grabbed Michael's hand and squeezed it with love as he spoke. "Please, Baby, don't hide your true feelings from me. We have always dealt with everything together, now is not the time to change that practice."
Michael kissed his husband tenderly on the lips and whispered, "I promise, Sweetheart. We will work through this together. Now has Hunter explained everything to you or do you want me to tell you what he told me?"
Ben spoke with love, "It's okay, Baby. Hunter and Dr. Todd explained everything to me days ago. I just didn't realize you weren't informed about anything. I won't let that happen again. Now smile for me, I want to see you happy. Believe it or not I'm doing better. You and I need to stay calm and positive for now. Okay?"
Michael sat and held his husband close in his arms for hours. All he wanted was to have his loving partner completely well at last. Ben drifted off to sleep as Michael stayed by his side all night.
Two weeks later Dr. Todd and Hunter made an announcement to the whole family. Dr. Todd spoke, "Ben, the treatment is working. Your T-cell count is stabilizing and your viral load is almost undetectable now. If you continue to improve you will be able to go home in about a week."
Michael broke out into tears and took Ben into his arms as he spoke. "Dr. Todd, are you sure? Ben is really improving?"
Dr. Todd nodded and reaffirmed his statement, "Yes Michael, it is true. Now keep in mind, Ben will have to continue taking the drug at home for at least a year and a half. If he stays stable through that length of time we will begin backing him off the drug until he never has to take it again. Patience is needed from you, Michael. Ben will need your full support during this period of time."
Michael looked at his husband as he spoke. "Ben has always had my full support Dr. Todd. You tell me what I need to do to help and I'll do it. Ben knows that." Michael gave his husband a kiss and held him close.
With this everyone in the room broke out with a cheer and shed their tears of joy. After another two weeks Ben was released from the hospital and went home for the first time totally HIV FREE. Michael watched over him like a mother hen but Ben didn't fight him. Ben loved his husband enough to allow him his emotions. He was happy just being home with his husband and three adorable children again.
As Ben and Michael sat in each other's arms, Michael realized what his husband was remembering and he whispered, "Sweetheart, don't hide your emotions from me. I know and understand what you are thinking about. You know there were several times during those long six weeks, that I was afraid I would lose you. You fought hard and the treatment worked, now for the last two years you have been HIV FREE and very healthy. I thank God that you are here with me now."
Ben gently kissed his husband and replied, "I was also thinking, what if we had never met?" Ben took a deep breath then continued, "I would have died years ago the first time I had the bad reaction to my meds. But you were there and saved me, that was only the first time. Then Hunter would still be a hustler or even died, but he is here and so successful. The twins would not be who they are today and Danielle would not even exist. I would say you, my dear Michael, are the one person anchoring this family and holding us all together. Do you truly know how much you are loved and appreciated?"
Michael leaned into his husband's warm embrace and answered. "I know, Sweetheart. WE HAVE HAD A WONDERFUL LIFE haven't we? Our children give us so much love and I'm so proud of each and each one of them from Hunter to Danielle. They are all so special to us both."
Ben held his loving husband close and gave thanks for Michael's presence in their lives. They had a WONDERFUL LIFE because Michael was there. Ben kissed Michael on his neck and said. "Thank you, Baby, for being you." At that point words were no longer needed. Ben and Michael sat together for hours silently giving thanks for having each other to love.
End of Our Wonderful Life
Saturday, May 2, 2009 4:35:37 PM
Contact author at madelyn1116@verizon.net