RATING: PG-13, MOSTLY LANGUAGE, AND ALL THAT GOOD STUFF :)
Keywords: MSR
Dana Scully wearily unlocked the door to her apartment and went inside. She had two things on her mind: sleep and food. Maybe she should put them in that order. Cases did that to her. She usually came back feeling as if she'd been up and hadn't eaten for a week. This case had been particularly tough; it had involved the brutal slayings of teenage girls in a sleepy town that looked like a candidate for the Most All American Town Award. The slayings had shocked the town, and the killer had shocked them even more: Norman Dunfries, a respectable looking sixty-five year old grandfather who was convinced that these girls were hellspawn and needed killing. He was the janitor at the local high school and had obviously seen one too many make out scenes behind the school gym.
The case disturbed Dana more than usual because of her niece Crissy. She was about the same age as the girls that were murdered, supposing the same thing had happened to her? She'd had problems maintaining objectivity on a case before, but it hadn't bothered her now as much as the last time. Maybe because she had been more stressed out then...
She picked up her mail off the mat and carried them into the bedroom where she gratefully sank onto the bed, dropping her carryall on the floor next to the door on her way in. She lay back and efficiently sorted them: bills, bills and more bills. Easy. Now for the fun part. She left the bills on the bed and went into the bathroom. She put in the plug, and turned on the taps and picked up a bottle of scented bath oil. She poured in a liberal amount and went back into the bedroom while the tub filled. She picked up a book and her phone and put them on the floor next to the bed. Then she undressed. She went back out into the apartment wrapped up in a towel and put a TV dinner in the microwave. She would heat it up after her long leisurely bath.
After getting in the bath, she picked up her book and started to read. It was a thick popular romance; she had taken to reading them after Mona, her sister in law had told her that she found them great for spicing up her sex life. "Gives me *all* kinds of ideas," the other woman had giggled. "Maybe they can *get* me a sex life," Dana had joked, but on her way back from her brother Charlie's she had stopped at a convenience store and picked out one that seemed at least half way decent. She was hooked on them now, and dared not let Mulder know what she read in her spare time -- he'd probably laugh her out of the FBI building.
She was now getting to the really good part -- the first major love scene -- when the phone rang. She picked it up irritably, sloshing water on the floor.
"Scully."
She sighed. It *would* be. She had just spent three weeks with the man and the moment she got back he *had* to call her.
"Yes, Mulder?" She asked, not hiding her irritation.
"You busy?"
"I'm in the *bath*." She stressed.
There was an audible inhalation and Fox Mulder's next words came out in a kind of half whisper -- "Naked?"
Dana was speechless. What exactly was that she heard in his voice? She figured it was safer not to try to work out what it was. She resorted to her usual kind of self defense:
"No, Mulder, I'm fully clothed and dancing on the taps."
He exhaled and laughed, all in the same breath. "Is that why you're so irritated?"
"I was reading."
"Let me guess. Forensics Today."
"You wouldn't understand what I was reading." She retorted, and glanced at the cover of the book while she did so. She mentally replaced the hunk in tight breeches for Mulder and blushed a bright red. Knowing exactly what Mulder looked like in various states of undress didn't help either.
"Scully?"
"Huh?!" She shook herself out of her reverie. "Yes?"
"That article must be really good. I just called to find out if you're okay. I realise that you were kinda -- " he stopped, looking for the right word " -- shook up about the whole case."
Scully was touched. He actually cared.
"I know you said you're okay, but..." he stopped, but Scully knew the implication. The last time this had happened, she had said she was fine then collapsed sobbing in Mulder's arms. It wasn't something that they talked about often, the deep feelings that ran between the two of them, but they were there.
"I really am okay, Mulder and its really nice that you called."
She could hear the smile in his voice. "You sound like Mommy's behind you coaching you."
Scully didn't take offense to the joke. She was too familiar with her partner and his weird sense of humour. She shifted in the water and realised with a shock that it was tepid. Had she really spent so long in the bath?
"Mulder, I've gotta go, the water's getting cold and I'm really tired. I think I'll even forego the meal and just snack and go to bed."
"None of that chocolate ice cream you got in the freezer, Scully. I don't want you putting on weight."
"You've been watching my weight?" She asked, surprised.
"Not exactly...but some of your clothes do seem kinda tight...unless you're trying to deliberately provoke the fellas in the office."
Scully laughed. "Anything for a rise, huh?"
"Oooh, Scully, I love it when you talk dirty."
Scully laughed, a real deep belly laugh. "Mulder, you're the worst! I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" She added, getting up and stepping out of the bath. Mulder could hear the water sloshing in the background. He refused to dwell on the images *that* sound provoked.
"Sleep well, Dana." he said finally. She smiled. He only used her name when he *really* cared.
"I will." She replied, and replaced the handset.
X X X
Dana woke up screaming and bathed in sweat. The dream had seemed so real. She had been at Charlie's home, with his wife Mona, daughter Chrissy, and his son, Michael. They had been out in the backyard having a barbecue, laughing and talking, when suddenly there was a noise like a thunderclap and the ground heaved and split. Norman Dunfries had clawed his way out. His blood shot eyes were blazing and there was blood all over his janitor's uniform, his face and snow white hair. The air was filled with the hissing of flames that leapt out from behind the old man and the cloying smell of sulfur and death. He grabbed a screaming Chrissy hissing "Hellspawn, you must die!" He dragged the fearful fourteen year old girl into the fissure with him. Dana lunged forward, the only one in the group that wasn't frozen in shock. She grabbed hold of Chrissy's hand as she slid down into the abyss, only to feel it slip out of her grasp. She stared into Chrissy's terrified green eyes; they were the last thing that Dana saw before the girl's auburn hair slid beneath the earth and the cleft closed up.
"Take me, she's innocent!" Dana had screamed, it seemed the only way to get the helpless girl back. But the earth stayed closed and Dana lay sobbing on the scorched grass.
Dana lay in the darkness, listening to the throb of her own heart. She was afraid to put her feet on the ground, Norman Dunfries might just claw his way up to her and then --
"Dana Katherine Scully!" she told herself sternly, "Get a grip!" She turned her head and watched the dull red glow of the numbers of the digital clock on the night stand. They seemed comforting. Sleep didn't come.
X X X
The first thing that Fox Mulder noticed as his partner came in the next morning was that she looked haggard and there were dark circles under her eyes.
"The boyfriend sure worked you hard last night," he joked, but didn't even get a dirty remark in return.
"Scully? What happened?" He asked, immediately going to her side. She took a deep breath, and appeared to be on the verge of saying something, then replied with a characteristic "Nothing, I'm fine, Mulder."
Mulder snorted his disbelief but said nothing. He knew Scully when she got into these kind of moods and the best thing to do was to wait till she said something or the situation got too much for her to bear alone, whichever came first.
For the rest of the day, Scully was subdued. Mulder knew there was something on her mind, but he wanted her to tell him about it...
X X X
Dana had the same dream for three nights in a row. On the fourth night, she picked up the phone, called a number from memory and said one word: "Help..."
X X X
Mulder lay on the bed, dressed only in his silk Star Wars boxers, cradling Dana as she haltingly told him the details of her dream. She was obviously terrified and she needed reassuring.
"Scully, maybe you need time off."
"I'm not sick, Mulder."
"Or try not to leave your feelings bottled up inside."
"So I can depend on someone else?" she retorted hotly. "I'm not helpless, and I can't depend on them being there all the time."
"*I'm* here all the time."
"Till you get some weird call and you go flying off in search of little green men! You can't protect me, Mulder. I can't make up for Samantha leaving, Mulder. I can't." Scully said passionately. Mulder took a deep breath. They had been over this before, and he hated it when Scully was right.
"Look Scully, it kills me when you hurt. It tears me apart. I need to help you, otherwise I feel like I'm not doing anything right. And you know that." he said softly, staring straight into her blue eyes. "You're my best friend. I have to do something."
She said nothing for a while, then said, "Is that all you feel for me? That I'm your best friend?"
Mulder was stunned. "Is that all you want me to feel?" He asked, afraid of what might come next. He had been talking about friendship...right? Just how Scully had wanted it. At least, that was what Dana had led him to believe all these years...
"I have to admit, I sometimes feel more than...buddy-like toward you, but if we become lovers --" she paused here, obviously thinking of what to say next -- "if we become lovers, it'll change things. I'm not sure if for the better or for the worst. And I'm not sure I want to find out. Or can we still be lovers and friends?"
"Lovers and friends meaning what?" He asked.
"Meaning that when we're not seeing other people and we feel the need for--" she stopped, flushing red, then gave a small embarrassed smile and continued "sex, then we sleep with each other, but if we're seeing other people, then..." she shrugged.
Mulder gave one of his slow sensuous smiles. "Interesting theory."
"But?" Scully asked.
"There is no but."
"Jesus, Mulder!" Scully hit him out of frustration. "How can you leave me hanging like this?"
"Easily. How about we talk about this later?"
"Later?" she echoed in disbelief.
"Yes, you need to sleep. When you get up, I'll make you breakfast and we'll talk. I promise. And I know you'll do the right thing."
"You're enjoying this Mulder."
"Damn right." He hugged Scully tighter and dropped a kiss on her nose. "Sleep, Scully."
She gave a profound sigh. Sometimes she would like to kill Fox Mulder. Slowly and painfully. But not tonight. She wanted to find out exactly what he felt about the whole thing. It had been bad enough telling him how she really felt, and she had surprised herself by actually telling him. She wasn't aware that she felt that way toward him. Who you trying to fool? She asked herself. You knew exactly how you felt. And you knew that being lovers -- as in serious relationship -- was not going to work. So where did the scratch-my-back-and-I'll-scratch-yours thing come from? As she thought, she lay there listening to Mulder's deep and even breathing. Funny how he always slept the easiest and soundest when he was close to her. She rolled over restlessly as the thoughts ran through her mind. This was not what she wanted to feel...but she knew why she was feeling like that. She wanted to feel feminine. She needed to feel that she could still "capture" someone. It was a female thing. The Bureau was robbing her of her female side. She was being to feel like "one of the boys". Well she wasn't. She'd prove it. She rolled over again. Well, maybe that wasn't all...she also wanted a relationship with no strings attached. She'd been burned too many times to hope for too much.
"If I want a relationship with no strings attached," she said aloud, "I should get a dog."
She smiled at that one, but it also made up her mind for her. She was going to do it. She had made up her mind. She was going to prove to herself that she could do it, have the power to seduce someone and feel good about it. After all, Fox Mulder had been hinting about it for years, and they were friends, she wouldn't get hurt. Not like in a "real" relationship. And once she had done it, she would buy herself that dog.
X X X
The next morning when she woke up, it was after nine. She sat up slowly, remembering the events of the night before. She looked across the room, to see Mulder's jeans and denim shirt draped carelessly over the back of a chair. She got up and padded to the bathroom, grateful that she had worn her one of her brother's old college shirts to bed rather than what she usually wore. Or to be more precise, what she usually *didn't* wear. She used the bathroom and wandered into the kitchen, to find Mulder standing in front of the stove, in boxers and her apron, spooning fluffy scrambled eggs into a bowl.
"Mulder?!"
He turned. "Morning, sleepy head." Noting her stunned gaze, he continued, "yeah, I can cook, contrary to popular belief."
She blushed then came to sit on one of the breakfast stools next to him. "We have a conversation to finish, I believe," she said, taking the initiative.
"After breakfast. I don't want the food I cooked to go to waste. I spent all morning slaving over a hot stove..."
X X X
All during breakfast, Scully couldn't get over how comfortable everything felt. How relaxed and easy. Maybe now they could stop the awkward silences and funny gazes. Finally they finished and sat there, staring at each other across the table. Well? Mulder asked her, you're the one that wanted to start this conversation so badly. Dana gulped and took a deep breath. This seduction thing was not as easy as it had seemed last night.
"You said that you wanted me to do the right thing, right?"
"Yeah." Mulder replied, his hazel gaze riveting her to the spot. He had a half smile across his face. A lazy, knowing, superior smile. "Do you know what the right thing is now? "
"Yeah, I was doing some serious thinking last night, and I --" she stopped. *This is not going the way I planned it.* Some soft words and Fox Mulder was supposed to be putty in her hands. *I read all the women's magazines. I know how it's done...in theory.*
She tried to start again. "I'm doing this to prove I can still do it, and you're the safest person I can think of." *Shit. Now that sounded like an experiment.* Mulder was obviously enjoying himself, grinning from across the table at her. She needed to make him understand that this was a friend-thing, not a come on.
"I liked the friends and lovers approach." Mulder prompted her. That got her back up. That statement and the grin on his face.
"Fox William Mulder, how dare you come into my house and insult me!" She snapped suddenly. Mulder looked surprised. That wasn't the response that he was expecting.
"Insult?" He trailed off, confused.
"Yes, insult. I called you when I needed help and you throw every thing back in my face!"
*Not true, Dana*
*Yeah, but he's making me nervous and I hate it when he does that*
"Dana --"
"Get out, Mulder, leave me alone!"
"Dana --"
"I mean it, go on!" She rushed out of the kitchen in a fury and locked herself in the bathroom. She felt really foolish now that the adrenaline had burned itself out. But she had to admit, this sex thing -- even between friends -- was more daunting than she thought.
X X X
The following week was a quiet one in the X files division. There were no cases, just a lot of paperwork to catch up on. Mulder and Scully politely skirted one another, like lizards getting ready to fight. They would wearily eye each other, then retreat back into their respective corners getting ready for the time they would have to lock horns and do battle. Scully kept reproaching herself for her childish behaviour. Mulder wondered why the hell he had let his mouth get the better of him -- again. He should have let her do what she wanted, with no interference from him.
On Wednesday night, she received a call from Mona, her sister in law. She sounded upset. "It's Michael, he's gotten his girlfriend pregnant." Mona told her in a low voice. "He's saying he'll support her, but it means he'll have to drop out of school and get a job ... and he's got a place guaranteed for him at the Naval Academy. His father is livid. He wanted Mikey to go ..." Mona sighed. "I want to help him, but Charles is just being so stubborn."
"Its the Irish in us." Dana replied, ruefully. "Want me to talk to him?"
"Who, Charlie?"
"Him or Mikey. Whatever."
Mona thought. Mikey idolised his Aunt Dana, and Charlie actually listened to what his sister told him. Could be worth a try. "Sure." She told the other woman.
They quickly made plans, Dana would secure some emergency leave from Walter Skinner, and leave as soon as possible.
Mulder was at first concerned when Scully just left without a word, then angry. It took him two days of slow burning anger to realise this was how she usually felt he did the same to her. He felt foolish. Dana had to be either a very patient person, or a sucker for punishment. Or maybe he was a fool for not valuing their friendship in the first place.
X X X
On Saturday, he spent the day cleaning out his apartment, trying to get rid of some of the frustration he felt at how he had messed up his life and, more importantly, Dana's life. She's probably gone for some long weekend with some one who appreciates her, he thought morosely as viciously swept the carpet. The fishes watched, bored, from their tank. It was the most activity they had seen in a long time, but they weren't letting the excitement get to them. They knew Mulder would soon burn out, watch one of his videos and catnap on the sofa. They had seen it before. As long as he didn't forget to feed them, they didn't care.
X X X
A knocking at the door woke Mulder from sleep. It was dark, and the TV was showing some late night movie that he had seen at least four or five times. He had distinctly remembered watching a video...at least the first five minutes of it. He smiled. He'd finally found a use for them -- sleep aides. The knocking came again, and he remembered what had woken him up. He answered the door to find Scully in a long dark trench coat and carrying an overnight bag.
"Scully?" He asked, surprised.
"Hi," she said, pushing past him and entering the apartment. "You cleaned." She commented, putting the bag on the floor and heading for the kitchen, kicking off her shoes on the way.
"Uh Scully -- "
"Mulder, I want you to sit on the sofa and don't move till I tell you."
"Wha --
"And don't talk either. Just watch." She went into the kitchen, and returned with a bottle of wine and two glasses. "I just had a very trying past couple of days and I need to relax, with my best friend before I go home. That okay with you? You had any plans for tonight? "
"Not now." Mulder said wryly and Dana laughed. She poured out wine in both glasses and offered Mulder one. Surprised, he took it, then watched as she went into the hallway and came back out, coatless. Mulder was about to make a comment when he saw her properly and stopped short. Dana was wearing a black lace teddy.
"Where's your clothes?" He asked stupidly.
"In the bag."
"You came back like that?" She nodded. "Why?"
"Cause I've been telling myself I've been a fool and that I should trust you, my best friend. I should be able to explore --" she smiled here "-- extreme possibilities with you. You know, scratch my back and I'll scratch yours. And I believe that by doing this, I'm doing the right thing. It won't screw up our relationship. I'm not asking for marriage and commitment and stuff, just for you to understand me. Us. Our friendship." Dana came toward him with each word, now she leaned over her still shocked partner and kissed him. "That's a sorry kiss." She smiled. "Want to see the makeup kiss?" He nodded. She lowered herself in his lap, put her arms around his neck and kissed him passionately. The fishes watched impassively from their tank. They hadn't seen this kind of action for a long time ... they hoped he wouldn't forget to feed them, though. Last time, he'd forgotten and Hugo had died ...
© Chaynne Taylor/Shateri Jordan, 1997-2004
Comments? sexychaynne@aemail4u.com
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