Before I Go

by A. Kite

Author's website: http://www.geocities.com/a_kite_fic/

Disclaimer: The characters belong to Atlantis/Alliance and probably a bunch of other Canadian type people. No copyright infringement is intended, and no money is being made.

Author's Notes: This is my own personal take on Ray Vecchio. Your vision may vary.

Story Notes: I don't consider this to be a slash story, but adult themes are explored.


There was one last thing Ray Vecchio had to do. He sighed and stared at the telephone on his desk. The bullpen was dark. Everyone else had cleared out an hour ago. One more thing to do and he'd leave too. Leave and maybe, just maybe, not come back.

The Feds would shit a brick if they found out he was doing this, but he couldn't go without saying something. God, it was going to be the hardest phone call he'd ever made. Benny. Benny deserved better than this. Better than him.

Ray Vecchio was no fool. He knew Benny loved him, and he loved his partner. Just not the way Benny needed to be loved. To go off like this when Fraser was in Canada, it was the coward's way to do it. To go away and say nothing, that would be totally chicken shit.

Ray thought for a few minutes about what he could say. What he could safely say and not lie. It was going to hurt Benny enough when he came back to find Ray gone. He couldn't out and out lie, though, that might be less hurtful in the long run. Ray snorted and derisively laughed at himself. Yeah, keep telling yourself that, Vecchio. Keep telling yourself that Benny will be better off without you here. That if you're gone maybe he'll find someone that can give him what he needs. You could do that, Vecchio, if you weren't such a coward. If you weren't so afraid of being tarred with the brush labeled gay. Gay was the least of the names he heard jeering through his head: faggot, queer, fruit, homo.

He was damned either way. Damned by his church, his family and upbringing. His own sense of right and wrong warred. Society itself and their profession in particular did not tolerate those that were different, those that wanted someone of their own sex. He'd been over it a hundred times, and he had been tempted. Lord knows he had been tempted.

Every time the fucking Feds gave him a break from learning to be Armando fucking Languistini he thought about running away. Straight to Canada. Straight to Benny. Straight to Benny, ha! That was the problem. It was better this way. Better for him to leave now before Fraser got back. One more job to do before he left.

Ray Vecchio pulled the folded paper with Benny's itinerary from his jacket pocket and checked the time once more. The guy waiting for him in Interrogation 2 could just wait. He picked up the phone.


End Before I Go by A. Kite: AKite68163@aol.com

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