Category: drama

Warnings: slash, angst

Rating: NC-17

Notes and Synopsis: I've always been bothered by the fact that Ray Vecchio has made sacrifice after sacrifice for Fraser, but the Mountie has never returned the favour. So, I've decided to write a story in which Fraser makes a sacrifice of the magnitude of Ray's sacrifice for him in Victoria's Secret'. When compared to what will happen to Fraser in this piece, Ray got off easy in VS.

Here's my darkest piece yet (it makes What Price for a Mountie's Soul' look like a romp in the park with Dief). It's rated NC-17 for graphic depictions of sexual and violent acts as well as a non-romantic slash situation (Just read the story, okay? Everything'll make sense, I promise.) and contains plenty of angst. Post Flashback' with Ray undercover, but ignoring seasons 3 and 4 (so, the apartment is still there, there's no Kowalski or Dewey, and Elaine's still a civilian aid).

As a final note, you'll really have to suspend all disbelief to read this without laughing. This is one of the most improbable pairings I could conjure up. Remember that I'm new at slash and writing steamy scenes, so please bear with me if things are less than satisfactory.

Flesh is Stronger Than Reason

by: Marie-Andrée

www.geocities.com/TelevisionCity/Network9492 uskeba@hotmail.com

Fraser sifted through his mail as he drank his cup of coffee. He absentmindedly stole a glance at his watch. There was still plenty of time for him to get to work. Hmm... this was a curious looking envelope. There was no stamp and his name was typed on it. Curious, he pried it open.

"Constable Fraser, (he read)

I know something about Ray Vecchio that I shouldn't know. And everyone will know too unless you agree to certain terms. Meet me at the house.

Frank Zuko

P.S. If seeing Ray alive again means anything to you, I wouldn't suggest talking to the cops."

Shocked, Fraser swallowed too quickly a scalding sip of coffee, burning the back of his throat. He began to cough violently, terrifying thoughts racing through his head. Step one, call in sick. He hurried over to Mr. Mustafi's and placed a call to the Consulate. Thatcher was understanding since his voice sounded raw. That it was raw from sheer terror and being burned rather than from a cold was information she did not need to know. Fraser then changed into civilian clothing and raced outside to hail a cab.

He shivered as he stood in front of the Zuko home, remembering what had gone down the last time he had been there. Fraser swallowed, took a deep breath, and walked up to the front door. He knocked once, twice, before Zuko answered.
"Ah! Constable Fraser!" he greeted him. "Come in." Fraser eyed his nemesis evenly as he was led into the living room.
"What do you want from me, Zuko?" He could not keep the anger out of his voice.
"My, we're a little temperamental, aren't we?" Fraser ignored him.
"What do you know about Ray?"
"That he's Armando Langoustini." Fraser felt like one of Zuko's goons had belted him again. "I would gain nothing by blowing his cover, Constable. But I have everything to gain if I don't."
"What do you mean?"
"Work with me, Constable, and I will make sure Ray is safe. I could use a man of your... talents." Fraser felt sick.
"One of my men, Fraser, is being less than loyal to me. You find out who and kill him for me, and nothing'll happen to Vecchio." Fraser's mind was racing. He'd done this before, hadn't he? Helped Zuko for the good of a friend? But if he couldn't kill for his father, would he be able to kill for Ray? He was still on the outs with the cops of precinct twenty-seventh, although things were slowly becoming better with Huey. If he did this now, then he would lose their respect for ever. Fraser had to admit that this was a small price to pay for Ray's safety. He answered with words full of dj...-vu,
"I'll do it." Zuko nodded. "Good."
"Will it be necessary to put in my resignation?" Zuko shook his head.
"Consider helping me a... hobby. But you had better help me, Fraser." Fraser nodded.
"Understood." Zuko smiled.
"Good."
"Where do I start?" Zuko pointed towards his office.
"I need an accountant."

Later that evening, Fraser headed for home, his mind sick with the numbers he had crunched. Such large sums of money... How had Zuko come to have them? The possibilities made the Mountie nauseous.

He took a long bath to try to rid his nostrils of the stale stench of the Zuko house and to purge his soul of this filthy mission. He had to talk to Welsh before things got out of hand. Welsh could make sure Ray was safe and then Fraser could stop the selling of his soul to Satan who bore the name of Frank Zuko.

Fraser went to the Consulate early the next morning for his shift and was able to head for the twenty-seventh around three o'clock. He knew something was amiss the minute he stepped into the squad room. He managed to intercept Huey.
"What's going on?" Huey glared at him.
"You tell me."
"I'm sorry?"
"You hanging out with Zuko now?"
"Yes, but there's a good reason..."
"We don't want to hear it, Constable."
"Ah, Leftenant, we really must speak..." Welsh shook his head.
"I can't even fathom a logical reason why our stakeout guys saw you spend eight hours with Zuko yesterday."
"Sir..." Welsh cut him off.
"Get out of my precinct or I'll have you arrested."

The next day, Fraser headed back to Zuko to begin his investigation. He was ill prepared for the greeting Zuko had ready for him.
"Come into my office, Fraser," Zuko called. Fraser obliged. "Tony here," Zuko glanced at the man who had replaced Charlie. "Says that he saw you going into the twenty-seventh." Fraser swallowed.
"I had some business to attend to."
"What did you tell them?"
"Nothing." Tony kicked Fraser in the back of the knees and the Mountie went down hard.
"What did you tell them?"
"Nothing." This time, Tony kicked Fraser in the ribs causing the Mountie to choke.
"I thought we had a deal, Constable."
"We do," Fraser managed to gasp out as Tony kicked him again.
"I expect loyalty from my men, Fraser. You made a mistake. Fine. I'll let it go this time. Next time, Ray's dead. Get up." Fraser struggled to his feet, holding his stomach. "Tony wants you to do something for him." Zuko sneered. "It would be wise to do what he wishes." Tony motioned for Fraser to follow him up the stairs.

In a bedroom, Tony shut the door. Fraser swallowed.
"I'm gay," Tony said.
"And I'm not," Fraser answered.
"Ever fucked a man?" Fraser shook his head, trying to hide the bitter taste of fear in his throat. Tony lowered his pants. "Gimme a blow job." He sat on the bed and looked at Fraser expectantly. The Mountie took a deep breath and knelt in front of Zuko's henchman, putting a hand between his thighs to release the goon's organ. Feeling sick, Fraser lowered his mouth onto the man's cock and proceeded to suck on it. Tony began to buck, driving his penis deeper into Fraser's throat. Fraser gagged involuntarily and decided he'd be better off getting this over with as soon as possible. He used his tongue to lick Tony's cock and the man finally came, his cum invading Fraser's mouth. "Swallow it," Tony ordered. Fraser did, knowing that he would be throwing it up soon enough. Pleased, Tony zipped up his trousers and ran a hand through his hair. "Frankie'll be happy to know you're loyal, Fraser-boy." Fraser nodded.

"You're late, Constable," Thatcher greeted Fraser the next morning, not looking up from her computer.
"I need to ask you a favour, Sir." Surprised by this request, Thatcher looked up. She was ill-prepared for the site that greeted her. Fraser was dressed in civilian clothing and had a lovely bruise marring his right cheekbone.
"What is it, Fraser? Are you all right?" Fraser shook his head.
"I need time off, Sir."
"How much?"
"I don't know, Sir. I have a few weeks leave coming to me. May I take it? Once that period is over we could make other arrangements, if necessary." The desperation in Fraser's voice surprised Thatcher.
"All right. Is there anything you need to talk about, Fraser?" He shook his head.
"No. But, Sir?"
"Yes?"
"Things aren't always what they seem, Inspector," he said cryptically.
"What..."
"I hope you'll never have to know what I mean by that."

"You're late, Fraser."
"I know. I was speaking with my superior officer." Zuko raised his eyebrows suspiciously.
"What about?"
"I took some leave so that I might concentrate on my work with you." Zuko nodded.
"I have a name, Constable."
"What?"
"When you talk to me, I expect you to use my name. It's Frank." Fraser nodded.
"Yes... Frank."
"Good. Tony tells me you were loyal yesterday, Fraser." Fraser closed his eyes for a moment, trying to rid his memory of the taste and silky texture of Tony's cock against his tongue, but not succeeding.
"Ray is my friend and I will do anything to protect him."
"Anything?" Fraser did not like the look in Zuko's eyes. He swallowed before answering.
"Yes. Anything."
"Very well. Get to work."
"Yes, Frank."

Fraser sat hunched over the account books trying to make them balance when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He tried to ignore the feather soft touch which gently stroked his cheek.
"You're beautiful, Constable. Anyone ever told you that?"
"Yes. You're the last one I'd expect to tell me that, Frank."
"The wife and kid are a cover."
"I've realised that much now. And Ray?"
"Just an excuse."
"An excuse to get me into your bed." Fraser felt Zuko nod.
"Yes."
"You tried to have me killed."
"Because you would not side with me. I need my men to be loyal to me, Fraser."
"And the man you want me to find?"
"There is no man, Fraser. You keep on doing as I say and I'll make sure Ray is protected, even when he returns." Zuko's touch became more erotic and Fraser flinched involuntarily. "What's wrong, Constable? You never been with a man before?"
"No. Unfortunately, I'm straight as an arrow."
"Unfortunately?"
"Women are so complicated."
"Yes, they are. Only a man can know how to pleasure a man, Fraser. I could teach you things you never knew existed." Zuko's hand reached down to stroke Fraser's balls. Fraser gasped. "You like that, don't you?"
"I hate you and I could never like anything you do to me."
"The will of the body is stronger than that of the mind, Constable. You will desire me. Ray Vecchio's life depends on it."
"I hate you," Fraser repeated.
"Ssh..." Zuko whispered. "And the woman you had, didn't you hate her, too?"
"How do you know about Victoria?"
"You just told me. Did you hate her?"
"Yes. No. Maybe."
"Which one is it, Constable?" Fraser did not answer. "Talk to me. Be truthful, or I will have your friend killed."
"I thought I loved her."
"Was she a good fuck?" At Fraser's hesitation, Zuko gripped his balls tighter.
"Yes."
"And so will I. I will fuck your hate of me out of you, Fraser. Let's go upstairs." Zuko released Fraser's balls and the Mountie stood stiffly, turning around slowly to face his nemesis.
"I will always hate you. I will hate you for what you did to Ray, to Irene, to Jack, even to me," Fraser said evenly.
"As I said before, Fraser, the body rarely listens to the mind."

Frank led Fraser up to one of the bedrooms.
"We'll do this slowly, Fraser, until you scream my name in ecstasy." Fraser laughed sarcastically, to hide his fear.
"That will never happen. You are aware that there is a name for what you are about to do. It's called rape." Zuko shrugged.
"Maybe. Sit on the edge of the bed." Fraser sat. "Unzip your jeans." The Mountie complied. "Pull out your cock." This done, Zuko went up to him and knelt between his legs. "I will pleasure you as you pleasured Tony yesterday, Fraser." Zuko bent over and quickly took Fraser into his mouth.

Fraser tried not to moan as Zuko gave him the blow job of his life. It was obvious that the man knew exactly what he was doing. The licking and nipping and sucking was driving Ben insane and it was all he could do not to scream as he came. Instead, he bit down on his lip, hard, drawing blood. Zuko let go of the now flaccid organ and grinned as he wiped some of Ben's semen from his lips.
"Like that?"
"No."
"You're a fucking liar, Fraser. Maybe this time you were able to control yourself, but it won't always be like that. The day you give in to the feelings of the flesh, your soul will be mine for eternity." Fraser ignored him.
"I guess that you want me to repay the favour'." Zuko shook his head.
"Not today. You still have a lot to learn, Constable. You'll spend the night here." Fraser nodded. "I have already had someone take care of your wolf--" he noticed a flicker of worry in the Mountie's eyes. "He's fine."

Fraser could not sleep in Zuko's house. The house Irene herself had described as full of guns and full of hate and full of fear'. He tossed and turned, knowing that someone would eventually come knocking. Sure enough, someone did.
"Come in," Fraser called and a man entered, his identity obscured by the darkness.
"Roll onto your stomach, Constable," Zuko ordered. Fraser obliged, trembling. "You know what I am here to do. I pleasured you today and now you will allow me to pleasure myself. You wouldn't know how to do that for me, so I will take my pleasure as I see fit." Zuko came over to the bed and Fraser heard him divest himself of his clothing. A shifting of the mattress told Fraser that he was no longer alone on the bed. He felt Zuko straddle him, sliding a hand into his boxer shorts, suddenly yanking them down. Cool night air circulated over Ben's ass, caressing it gently. He felt Zuko's hands on his ass cheeks, stroking them, sliding a hand in and out of the cleft. Then, there was only one finger, and it felt strange, cold and slippery. The finger found its way to the puckered opening of Ben's ass and fought its way in. "This won't hurt if you relax, Fraser." Ben tried to will his muscles to unclench, but they would not listen. The finger went in deeper until Ben could not determine where he ended and the finger began. He let out a whimper when the finger began to stroke his prostate and he felt himself going hard. "I can tell that you like that, Fraser. Eventually, I will fuck you to bring you pleasure. But, tonight, the pleasure will be mine, to teach you obedience." Fraser swallowed as a second, then a third, finger was added until his ass was full to the point of bursting. They withdrew slowly. Fraser felt Zuko shift and he knew what would come next. He screwed his eyes shut as Zuko forced himself into him in one fell swoop, the lubricant no match for the clenched muscles, Zuko's cock tearing Fraser's rectum's tender flesh. The pain was like none Fraser had ever experienced, worse than the pain which had radiated from Ray's bullet. Zuko pounded into Fraser with an animalistic fury, emptying and filling him until Fraser was certain that the pain of the fierce thrusting would tear him in two.

And then the filling pain was gone, replaced by an almost tolerable throbbing. Ben felt Zuko roll off of him.
"Thank you, Constable. I'll see you in the morning." Fraser curled into a ball. Eventually, he fell into a fitful sleep.

He was sore when he awoke the next morning, his internal injuries screaming for relief. Fraser gagged at the sight of the blood and semen on the sheets.

Finally, he had made for Ray a sacrifice worthy of their friendship, a sacrifice like Ray had made for him, during that dark winter of Fraser's life.

Huey knocked on Welsh's door.
"Come in," the Lieutenant called." The Detective entered. "What can I do for you, Jack?"
"Guess what?"
"What?"
"The Mountie spent the night at Zuko's place." Welsh raised his eyebrows. "The surveillance team saw him leave early this morning." Welsh sighed.
"I'll get Elaine to talk to him."
"Why?"
"Something's funny. I shouldn't have brushed him off that day. He won't talk to me, now, but he'll talk to her."

Fraser sat huddled in a corner of his apartment, a cold cup of tea at his feet. He didn't know how long he'd sat like that. He vaguely remembered leaving the Zuko house that morning and coming home to take a long hot bath. He'd changed into sweats and made himself a hot beverage, then had come to sit by the window. What he didn't know was how much time had elapsed. He almost jumped when someone knocked at his door.
"Benton? It's Elaine. May I come in?" Elaine? Fraser raised dazed blue eyes towards the door. What could she want? It was too late to tell her, now. Maybe if he was quiet, she would go away. "Benton?" she called again. "Mr. Mustafi says he heard you come in." There was no sense in hiding.
"Come in, Elaine." Elaine was surprised by the tone of Fraser's voice. It was flat, soulless.

Fraser struggled to his feet as the civilian aid came into the spartan apartment, the pain of his injuries making him want to cry out. The first thing Elaine noticed about the Mountie was the excruciating pain radiating from clouded blue eyes.
"What's wrong, Benton?!" she exclaimed, taking in the dark rings around Fraser's eyes and the now greenish-yellow bruise on his cheek.
"Nothing, Elaine. I wasn't home and you didn't see me."
"What's wrong?" she repeated more forcefully.
"Nothing," Fraser insisted. "I... I made a decision and must now live with it. It's too late for anyone to do anything about it."
"Are you in some kind of trouble?" Fraser hung his head.
"Yes. Promise me, Elaine, for your sake, that nothing you have seen or heard here will leave this room."
"Ben..."
"Promise me!" he pleaded, the urgency in his voice surprising Elaine.
"I promise."
"Tell them... tell them... That Zuko and I will be spending a lot of time together from now on. Maybe one day you'll all understand why." Elaine nodded.
"I'm worried about you."
"Don't be. I... I have to do this, Elaine. Go now, please, you shouldn't be seen with me." Elaine swallowed, wishing desperately that she could help. "Go!"

Welsh looked up to see who had knocked at his door. "Ah, Elaine!" She came in and closed the door. "So, what's up with Fraser?" She shook her head.
"Nothing."
"The guy spends a night at Zuko's and you believe him when he said it was nothing?" She shrugged.
"He said that we'll understand one day."
"So, he and Zuko are..." Elaine nodded.
"He didn't say it in those exact words, but yes." Welsh let out a deep breath.
"I would never have guessed. Geeze, I wonder how long he's been on Zuko's side." He shivered at the possibilities.
"Sir, I don't think that he is on Zuko's side. He looks pretty messed up."
"How do you mean?"
"Looks like he took a beating. And he's scared." Welsh stroked his chin. Then it hit him like a coup de foudre.
"Vecchio."
"Sir?"
"This has something to do with Vecchio. Dammit! If I had listened to him that first day... Okay, I'm going to start the paperwork to pull Vecchio out of there. Once he's secure, I'll try to get hold of Fraser."
"You think that Fraser is trying to protect Ray?" Welsh nodded. "Makes sense."
"Get Huey in here, we have work to do."

"Fraser? You in there?" After Elaine had left, Fraser had managed a nap and he was just waking up when Zuko arrived at his apartment.
"Yes, Frank. Come in." Zuko stepped into the spartan apartment.
"You should have kept the furniture." Fraser shrugged, sitting up.
"It wasn't my style." Zuko nodded.
"How badly did I hurt you?" The question surprised Fraser.
"I'm okay."
"That's not what I asked."
"I think that there was quite a lot of damage."
"You'd want to avoid that from happening again, right?"
"Yes."
"In a week or two, once you've healed, I'll show you that fucking can be the most pleasurable activity imaginable."
"I hardly would imagine it could be so."
"There are a lot of things you don't know, Constable."
"Like what?"
"Well, yesterday you would never have guessed that I would give you the blow job of your life." Fraser remained passive. "Fine, deny it if you want. I know the truth. Take your clothes off. I want to have sex." Fraser flinched. "It doesn't have to hurt if you listen to me, Fraser." Ben took a deep breath and pulled his sweatshirt over his head. Zuko smiled at the pale expanse of skin that was Fraser's chest. "Stop here for a moment." He went over to the bed and sat beside Fraser, pulling him down onto the mattress, stroking his back.

Zuko used his tongue to explore Ben's chest, sucking each nipple to a hard point. His hand eventually strayed downwards, slipping past the elastic waist band to stroke Fraser's cock. Fraser became hard very quickly. "Touch me," Zuko ordered, squeezing Fraser's testicles. Fraser shifted a little to unbutton and unzip Zuko's trousers, slipping a hand into Frank's briefs to massage Zuko's balls. Zuko wriggled a bit, allowing the pants to slip further down. He rolled onto Fraser, pushing the terrified Mountie onto his back. Zuko took only a moment to yank his and Fraser's pants off before attacking Fraser's groin with eager hands and his chest with a slick tongue. Fraser let go of Zuko's balls, grasping the sheets instead, bunching them as Zuko thrust against his belly; the feel of Zuko's cock against his own was deliciously erotic. Zuko's rhythm increased to a frantic pace until all Fraser could see was a rainbow of colour before him. It was only after he'd cum that he realised that he had screamed his nemesis' name in an animalistic fury of raw and primitive fornication.

Three days later, Ray Vecchio entered Welsh's offices. The Lieutenant jumped up to greet his Detective.
"Ray!" Vecchio grinned.
"Hey, Lieu. What's up? Everything was going so well, I don't understand why I was pulled out..."
"Sit down." Ray blanched.
"What is it?"
"We suspect that Zuko found out about you. And is using this information to blackmail Fraser, possibly into having sex with him."
"What?!"
"He tried to talk to me, but... but I was too stupid to listen. You're safe now, and I'm going to send Huey over to get Fraser the hell out of Zuko's house. We won't know what's going on till we talk with Fraser."

After another bout of explosive sex, Fraser relaxed into Zuko's arms. He was surprised that Frank held him now. Before, after cumming, Zuko had leapt to his feet and got cleaned up and dressed before Fraser could even come back to his senses. Now that Zuko knew that he had Fraser's loyalty, the sex had become almost tender. Fraser enjoyed the act; even sex with Zuko was more satisfying than masturbation, but that was all. Fraser hated being Zuko's sex slave, hated fucking a man, hated the fact that Zuko was the first lover of his life to take him beyond ecstasy, to new peaks he could never have fathomed. But, most of all, Fraser hated himself for enjoying the sex.

Huey stood outside the Zuko house, his mind flooded with memories of a dark past and the knowledge that once again he had failed the Mountie. He remembered cruel things he had said to him, What's wrong with your pal, Vecchio? Can't think straight without his boots?' and the way he had brushed him off this time, when Fraser had quite literally been begging for help. Huey took a deep breath, marched up the front walk, and rang the doorbell resolutely. Tony answered.
"Yeah?" Huey showed his badge.
"I want to speak with Constable Fraser. Alone."
"He's busy."
"I'm prepared to wait."
"Just a minute."

Fraser was getting dressed when Tony knocked on the door.
"Yes?"
"There's a cop outside who wants to talk to you. Alone." Fraser turned to Frank who shrugged.
"Use the living room. Tony, see that they aren't disturbed."

Once Fraser had led Huey to the privacy of the living room, the Detective allowed himself a good look at the Mountie. He had lost a lot of sleep and the shadows under his eyes proved that he wasn't sleeping well.
"Ray's safe, Fraser." Fraser paled, trembling imperceptibly.
"How..."
"We figured it out. We're, I'm, so sorry."
"He's safe?"
"Yes."
"Thank you for coming."
"Aren't you coming back with me?" Fraser shook his head.
"Not now, at least."
"Why?" Fraser shrugged.
"The minute I leave, I'm dead. I'll only leave with enough stuff to bring Zuko down."
"You going to be okay?" Fraser shook his head.
"I can handle it, Huey."

That night, as he dressed, Zuko discussed with Fraser some information he had been privy to.
"I'm told that Vecchio's back."
"That's what Detective Huey came to tell me."
"So, I have nothing to hold you here anymore. Why have you stayed?"
"I have my reasons."
"Too bad you ain't gay, Constable. I might have fallen in love with you."
"You don't know what love means, Frank."
"You could teach me."
"I don't know anymore than you, but I do know that this isn't it." Frank shrugged.
"Get out of my bedroom, I'm done with you for tonight."

Back in his room, Fraser finished putting some things in an envelope. He sealed it shut and addressed it to Detective Raymond Vecchio to the care of the twenty-seventh division of the Chicago police department. He snuck out quietly to deliver his package.

States Attorney St. Laurent couldn't believe what Ray had presented him with. Account books, tape recorded conversations, photographs... enough to put Frank Zuko and his goons behind bars for the next five lifetimes. As for Ray, he sat at his desk, head in his hands, sobbing quietly. His tears stained the neatly handwritten letter before him.

"Ray," Fraser had written. "I sold my soul to Zuko in exchange for your safety. I have lain with the Devil and enjoyed it and for this I will burn in the eternal Hell. Zuko will not allow me to leave him, much less betray him as I have just done by giving you this package. Even from behind bars he will find a way to get to me. I have decided that if I am going to die, it will be on my terms; I want to protect you, Ray, from memories of finding me murdered in some unimaginable way. Just as you would have given me your very soul that dark night, I give you my soul today, brother. Benton Fraser."

The phone rang then, just as Ray expected it would. They would have found Benny's body somewhere, maybe in the lake after he'd grand jetd off a pier... That wasn't important. What was important was that once again Fraser had saved them all from Zuko, and once again they had failed to protect him from this monster.

Several people would burn in the eternal Hell, and Ray knew that Fraser would not be one of them.