***********************
Overheard
MHH
"Ray, if you're free this evening, I thought we might - "
"No."
"Pardon me?"
"No. Not after the last time."
"You gave every appearance of enjoying yourself last time, Ray."
"Appearances deceive, Fraser. You appear to be a sane, sensible officer of Canadian law, but we both know that's a big front for a suicidal, partner-risking, juggernaut of Justice. With a capital 'J'. The last time I let you suggest an activity, I couldn't sit down for a week. Do you know what that looks like to the bozos around here? Aching thighs, sore butt, back out of whack, you tried to cripple me, Fraser."
"Not on purpose. I had no idea a few minutes' activity would affect you so adversely."
"A few minutes? It was more like an hour."
"I'm accustomed to going all day, with a few breaks."
"Last time was the LAST time, is that clear?"
"I'm sorry, Ray. I didn't realize. Perhaps if we went slowly - "
"No. Not slowly. Not quickly. Not in a car, not near or far, not from a jar. I don't know how to make this any clearer. I'm not interested."
"You've made yourself abundantly clear, Ray. I'm simply suggesting that you might want to leave your options open. Skill and conditioning alleviate most of the discomfort. More than a raw novice might appreciate."
"Raw is the operative word, Fraser. I lost skin! Nobody should have to bleed to have fun."
"With more practice, I'm sure the tenderness would subside. It's just a matter of muscle memory and countering certain instinctive responses."
"Look, I know I said we should try stuff that one of us likes. I tried it, hated it, end of story. Okay? If that's how you want to spend your evening, take Turnbull. I bet he'd love a sore butt."
"Ray! Turnbull's experience is even more extensive than mine. He's unlikely to experience the level of discomfort you did. Rather than pursue this subject any further, perhaps you should suggest an alternate activity?"
"How about a quiet dinner someplace with good food and low lights, a long wolf-walk in the park, and early to bed?"
"That's an itinerary we've both enjoyed before. Isn't there something you enjoy that you want me to try?"
"It's a start. Maybe your iron-assed equestrianism will inspire me?"
"As long as it doesn't involve Turnbull, I'm game."