DISCLAIMERS - The characters in this story don't belong to me. Any of them. I promise to return them to their respective owners when I'm done with them. Well, I may have to keep Kowalski. I'm making no money at all from this, I swear.

RATINGS - Rated SH for Silly as Hell, and beyond that, there's not much else to rate. Implied m/m relationship.

NOTES - Okay, this Due South slash story contains spoilers for Star Wars, Episode One. Odd, I guess, but hey - that's me. This idea came about because of my slightly, er, skewed view of The Phantom Menace, and my best friend's more traditional viewpoint. So if you want a scapegoat, blame her. Forgive me. I simply couldn't help it.

"What the hell are you talkin' about, Fraser?" Ray cried indignantly, shock and a sudden, irrational anger warring in his eyes. "They were not!"

"Of course they were," Fraser said airily, opening the door of the GTO and sliding into the passenger seat.

"No! No they - they - arg!" the detective sputtered, taking his seat behind the wheel, slamming the door, and then glaring at his lover. Fraser sat there placidly, his expression neutral, except for the barest suggestion of a glint in his eye. "They were not." Ray stated firmly. "Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi were not lovers!"

"Now, Ray," Fraser said. "There's no reason to get upset. And yes, they were. It's the classic Erastes/Eromenos relationship."

"Dammit -!" With no small amount of effort, Ray drew a deep breath, closing his eyes in an attempt to calm down. After several more deep, cleansing breaths, he opened his eyes and looked at Fraser. "No, they were not," he said with as much confidence as he could muster, which was, as usual, a relatively large amount. "If the Jedi code forbids a Master to have two Padawans, I'd bet it'd forbid.....that, too."

"That?" Fraser repeated, one elegant eyebrow arching slightly.

"Yes, that." Ray said.

"That, as in homosexuality in general, or a romantic relationship between Master and Padawan?"

Ray sighed loudly. "Either/or," He said. "And what the hell makes you think they're lovers?" Ray was pretty sure he and Fraser had both been at the same showing of Star Wars: Episode One, and he sure as hell hadn't picked up on anything like that. All he'd seen was the usual, run-of-the-mill Master/apprentice relationship. Hadn't he?

"Well, Obi-Wan's reaction to Qui-Gon's death, for one thing, he - "

"Fraser," Ray interrupted in annoyance. "When someone has raised you practically from birth, you're gonna be upset when he gets whacked right in front of ya. That doesn't make them lovers."

Ray watched as Fraser's face took on the "college professor" look. Then, in the "college professor" tone, Fraser said,

"Firstly, according to the "Jedi Apprentice" novels, Qui-Gon met Obi-Wan when the latter was almost thirteen years old. That's not "from birth". And his reaction to his Master's death isn't the only thing that led me to conclude that they were lovers. I'd be happy to explain my reasoning to you, if you will allow me to do so."

"Fine, fine," Ray said, braking rather abruptly for a light. "But you're not gonna convince me that Qui-Gon was bangin' his Padawan."

The detective's choice of words received a stern glance from the Mountie, but Fraser said nothing about it, merely launched into what Ray sensed was going to end up being a pretty long speech.

"Well, when they board the Federation's ship - or, station, rather - the droid brings them drinks, after being ordered to stall them, so the viceroy can contact Lord Sidious. There's something in the way Obi-Wan looks at Qui-Gon during that scene that's very suggestive of intimacy. Actually, now that I think of it, Obi-Wan tends to gaze at his Master often in that manner."

Fraser glanced over at Ray, who was gripping the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles had gone white, smiled a little, and continued.

"They each seem very comfortable with the other's proximity. I don't think the concept of personal space is one they're familiar with." He paused briefly, remembering a certain scene in the movie. "And, there's a particularly powerful moment between the two of them on Courescant. When they're out on a balcony of sorts, and Obi-Wan is telling Qui-Gon not to defy the Jedi counsel again. Qui-Gon tells him that he still has much to learn, then reaches out and places a hand on his shoulder. Obi-Wan leans into him a little, as though the contact might deepen into an embrace, but of course, it does not. The implication was there, however."

"No, it wasn't." Ray snapped. "There were no implications of any kind, they were teacher and student, and that's it, Frase. That's all. Okay?" He brought the car to a nearly screeching halt in front of Fraser's apartment building. "Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi were absolutely, positively not lovers, okay?"

Fraser looked at him, and Ray was amazed to find his lover smirking at him. "But what about the way Qui-Gon caressed Obi-Wan's face with his last dying, er, movement? Like this,"

Fraser leaned forward and trailed his fingers lightly down one side of Ray's face. Ray froze, his body warming at the instant Fraser's fingers touched his skin.

"Isn't that the sort of thing lovers do?" the Mountie asked, his voice taking on a deep, seductive timbre.

"They weren't lovers," Ray said weakly, his resolve melting away in the heat of Fraser's gaze.

"Of course they weren't," Fraser said suddenly. "The code would undoubtedly forbid it."

"What?!" Ray cried, stunned. "What did you say?"

"They weren't lovers."

"Then why the hell did you start this argument?" the detective growled menacingly.

Fraser grinned at him then, a wide, mischievous smile that Ray had never seen before.

"Because you're so cute when you're angry," he said.

THE END.