Due South and all of its characters belong to Alliance Communications

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Story page: http:users4.50megs.com/callie/

COMFORT

by Callie

The doors swung shut noisily as Constable Benton Fraser hurried into the hospital reception area. Glancing around, he headed towards the reception and the young red-headed woman sitting behind the desk.

"Excuse me," he said politely to the receptionist. "I wonder if you could help me?"

The woman looked up from her files smiling broadly at the Mountie. "Yes, of course," she replied eagerly fluttering her eye lashes flirtatiously.

"I was meant to meet my friend here today," Fraser said ignoring the suggestive expression on her face. "But I seem to have forgotten what room he will be in." Fraser smiled his best disarming and persuasive smile.

The woman beamed at him looking towards her computer screen. "What's your friend's name?" she asked, her fingers poised over the keyboard.

"Vecchio," Fraser answered leaning forward slightly. "Raymond."

The woman's fingers ran over the keyboard tapping in the name. Looking up, she smiled again. "Room 511. Fifth floor," she pointed towards the elevator. "The record says that he's scheduled for surgery in a couple of hours."

Fraser masked his concern at her words with a smile. "Thank you kindly," he said as he headed towards the elevator. Standing at the back of the elevator, Fraser's thoughts turned to his partner; he recalled that he had noticed that Ray had been looking tired recently, but had dismissed it putting it down to Ray's recent heavy case load. "What kind of partner and friend are you?" he cursed himself silently "Ray is ill, and you didn't even notice."

Fraser wasn't sure when it had happened, but he knew that he was deeply in love with his slender partner, and the thought of him being ill frightened Fraser in a way he couldn't explain. He needed Ray, loved him with an intensity that had even surprised him. Frightened that Ray would be revolted by him, he managed to keep his emotions well under control valuing Ray's friendship too much to admit his feelings.

His thoughts were interrupted as the elevator doors slid open. Fraser hurried down the corridor scanning the numbers on the doors. He slid to a halt outside room 511.

Taking a deep breath to control his jumbled emotions, he peered around the door. Fraser couldn't smiling to himself; the object of his anxiety sat on the bed, his long legs swinging from side to side absently. Blonde head down, Ray was studying the hospital gown draped over his legs.

Fraser stepped quietly into the room. "Ray," he said making his blonde partner jump in surprise, his head jerking upwards. "I am told on good authority that it's customary to put the gown on."

"Frase," Ray stuttered. "What are ya doing here?"

Fraser cocked his head to one side. "I could ask you the same question," he replied.

"I thought ya were busy this weekend," Ray avoided the question. "What about the suit yer supposed to be showing the hot spots of Chicago to?"

"The visit was cancelled. Monsieur La Roque's daughter was taken ill. I, therefore, found myself at a loose end." Fraser stared at Ray making the blonde drop his head to stare at the gown again. "I decided to treat my partner to breakfast. But when I got to his apartment, he was no-where to be found. I talked to his landlady and she let slip that he was at the hospital. So, of course, being concerned about him. I took a cab. And here I am."

"Sorry," Ray flushed slightly looking up from his study of the gown. "Ya weren't supposed..... supposed to find out," he said quietly. Fraser took a moment to study his friend; Ray's face was pale, lines of exhaustion etched on his thin features and his usually bright blue eyes looked tired. He cursed himself again for not noticing.

"Ray," Fraser sat on the bed next to Ray. "Of course, I would want to know if you were ill," he said. "I would want to help my friend."

"I know," Ray agreed looking miserable.

"Please tell me what's wrong Ray?" Fraser said. "I would like to help if I can."

Ray shrugged his shoulders dismissively. "Not really ill. Just something I've had since I was a little kid." Fraser nodded encouragingly. "But you'll only.... laugh if I tell ya why I'm here." Ray idly fiddled with the hospital gown. "It's.... it's just kinda stupid."

"Ray. My friend," Fraser said, a hint of exasperation in his voice. "I promise I will not laugh. And I know it won't be stupid. Please tell me."

Ray flushed again looking down at the hospital gown. "Well. I've gotta..... gotta have my tonsils out." He looked up at Fraser. "See told ya it was stupid."

Fraser took a deep breath. "Ray. Of course, I don't think it's stupid," he replied patting Ray on the hand gently. "And I am not laughing."

Ray smiled at Fraser. "Thanks," His smile turned to a frown. "I aint told anyone. Well except my landlady. I didn't even tell Welsh. I just sorta..... booked some vacation time. So you won't..... ya know?"

Fraser immediately understood what his partner was trying to say. "No I won't tell anyone," he smiled saluting. "Mountie's honour."

Ray bit his bottom lip. "It's just..... ya know. They'll think it's stupid having a kid's operation at my..... my age."

"I am quite sure they wouldn't," Fraser reassured. "However, I am curious. If you have suffered since childhood, why didn't your parents do something about having your tonsils removed?"

"They tried," Ray smiled thinly. "I was ten. Mum and Dad even got me to the hospital. Then I kinda..... kinda lost it and screamed the place down. My Dad got real mad and took us home. Said I was.... stupid and silly. And that I showed him up in front of the doctors. Said that as far as he was concerned, I could suffer with the tonsillitis."

"That seems unnecessarily cruel of your father," Fraser sympathised. "What about your mother?"

"Mum did try to change his mind, but Dad.... well he wouldn't budge," Ray replied a hint of sadness in his voice, which made Fraser want to take the slender man into his arms. "So I.... ya know suffered it. Even Stella gave up with me. Whenever I had an attack, she just used to ignore..... ignore me, and tell me I was being a baby," Ray stopped biting at his bottom lip again.

"So what made you change your mind?" Fraser asked curious.

Ray swallowed. "Well for the last few months, it's been getting worse. Last month, it got real bad. So bad that I just wanted to curl up and die. So I gave myself a bit of a talking to. And took myself off to a doctor. And here I am," he finished.

"I see," Fraser said quietly. "I wish you had told me."

"Sorry," Ray murmured guiltily. "But now I'm here...... I wanna go home," he murmured shivering slightly. He glanced sideways at Fraser, his blue eyes filled with fear. "They said I can go home tonight if everything goes OK. But Frase. I don't.... don't like it here."

"Ray," Fraser adopted his best stern expression taking Ray's slender hand in his larger one, feeling pleased that Ray didn't flinch away from the action. "I know you hate hospitals. But you have just told me that you were in a lot of pain the last time you suffered from tonsillitis. It's a very simple operation. When it's done, you won't suffer the pain ever again."

"I won't?" Ray sounded doubtful.

Fraser shook his head reassuringly. "And you'll be able to eat all the ice-cream and jelly you can for a couple of days," he promised.

Ray beamed at the thought. Frowning slightly, he stared distractedly towards the door. "I was kinda.... OK until the doctor told me what he was gonna do to me," he shivered again at the thought.

"I am sure he didn't mean to frighten you," Fraser assured squeezing Ray's hand. "He was only trying to prepare you for the operation. I am sure that everything will be fine."

"But it'll hurt," Ray whined. "The doctor told me... told me that because my tonsils had been left so long, they were bigger than usual. So.... so the operation could hurt a lot. And then they're gonna give me some sorta pre-injection thingy to calm me down. But it won't cos I hate needles. Then they're gonna...," he wailed recalling the doctor's description. Ray turned panicked blue eyes towards the Mountie. "Frase. I wanna go home."

"Ray. Calm down," Fraser squeezed the slender hand again until he felt Ray relax slightly. "Unfortunately, any childh....," he stopped as Ray glared at him. Fraser thought for a moment, carefully choosing his words. "Of course, as an adult an operation of this type is going to be very painful initially...," Fraser continued.

"Frase. Kinda not making me wanna stay," Ray interrupted throwing the Mountie a lopsided grin. "Yer meant to say. Ray my friend. Of course it's not gonna hurt."

"I am terribly sorry Ray," Fraser blushed. Adopting his best serious expression, he looked directly at his partner. "Ray my friend. Of course, it's not going to hurt," he said not being able to stop the small grin tugging at his mouth.

"I'm doomed," Ray groaned. "But I guess now ..... now I'm here, I'll let them do their worst."

"Good," Fraser stood up releasing Ray's hand heading towards the door. "Now why don't you get changed," he indicated the gown. "And I will go and telephone Turnbull to tell him to look after Diefenbaker for me."

"Yer staying?" Ray said, not being able to disguise the hopeful tone in his voice.

Fraser turned back towards his friend. "Of course Ray. And when you have had your operation, I will be taking you home and looking after you," he said simply.

"Ya will?" Ray said jumping off the bed pulling off his t-shirt throwing it onto the chair at the side of the bed.

Fraser avoided looking at Ray's half naked lean body. "Yes," he replied. "Who else will make sure you don't drown in ice-cream and jelly?"

"Understood," Ray mimicked as he struggled with the unflattering hospital gown.

Pausing in his struggles, Ray watched as Fraser disappeared out of the door. He smiled to himself knowing that he had a good friend in Fraser. Without warning, his stomach lurched in the all too familiar feeling he had been experiencing recently whenever his thoughts turned to the Mountie.

He loved Fraser and it terrified him more than having to face down an armed criminal - that he could handle easily, but his feelings for Fraser made him feel afraid and vulnerable. "Don't be stupid Kowalski," he chastised himself. "Fraser wouldn't look twice at a guy like ya." Sighing heavily, he continued to undress slipping into the gown. Settling himself in bed, he couldn't help tensing nervously as a nurse entered the room, a covered tray in her hands. "Frase," he thought to himself as he clenched his hands into fists.

***************

Fraser sat quietly watching Ray sleep; his partner's face was still pale and he had an IV attached to his left hand.

He had returned from making his telephone call to the Consulate to find his partner wrestling with the nurse who was trying to give him his pre-med injection. Fraser

had been able to persuade Ray to calm down enough for the nurse to administer the injection. Ray had clung onto his hand his eyes tightly closed, and Fraser had felt a warm glow spread through his body at the contact.

After the nurse had left, the partners had spent half an hour talking before the effects of the pre-med had taken hold making Ray drowsy, his speech slurring slightly. Ray had smiled sleepily at Fraser, the injection seeming to have stripped him of his usual aggressive armour leaving only his inherent vulnerability. Fraser had thought that he was the most beautiful creature he had laid eyes, deciding that even a sleepy Ray was immensely desirable.

Fraser had waited patiently while Ray had his operation, a kindly nurse supplying him with cups of tea. At lunch-time, his partner had been returned to the room. The doctor was pleased with the outcome of the operation, despite the fact that Ray had been sick while he had been in recovery and was now running a high temperature.

Ray murmured in his sleep, and Fraser leaned forward resisting the temptation to stroke his friend's face and hair in comfort. He satisfied himself with holding the slender hand, squeezing gently letting his partner know he was still there.

Fraser was awoken from his light doze by his hand being squeezed. Looking over to his friend, he noticed that Ray's eyes were open watching him. Fraser stood up leaning over his friend. "Hello Ray. How do you feel?" Ray opened his mouth but no sound came out. "Ssssh. Don't try to speak," Fraser said pushing the call button above the bed. Ray smiled sleepily at him squeezing his hand again.

Fraser's reply was interrupted by the doctor entering the room. "So how is our patient doing?" he asked cheerfully scanning the chart hanging at the bottom of the bed. "Mmmmm. I see you were sick a couple of times in recovery. And you have a temperature." He smiled at Ray. "So let's have a quick look at you," the doctor said leaning forward.

Fraser watched silently as the doctor thoroughly examined his friend. The doctor removed the IV from Ray's hand before his partner slumped back against the pillows exhausted, his face looking paler than before. Ray turned his head, smiling slightly at the Mountie. Fraser smiled back. "It will be alright," he mouthed silently.

The doctor scribbled some notes on the chart. "Well young man," he directed his comments at Ray. "How do you feel?"

Ray put his hand up to his throat. "Hurts," he rasped.

"I am afraid it will for a few days," the doctor admitted. Ray pulled a face and the doctor chuckled. "But I promise it will get better."

"Can I go home now?" Ray managed to croak holding onto his throat.

The doctor looked back down at the chart. "Well I would be happier if you hadn't been sick," he tapped the chart with his pen. "And I am not at all happy about your temperature being so high."

"Please," Ray pleaded. Fraser moved forward sensing that his friend was becoming agitated at the thought of having to stay in the hospital.

The doctor studied Ray for a moment, seeing the look of panic and fear in his clear blue eyes. "Ray. I know how you feel about hospitals but...," he started to say.

Fraser stepped forward quickly. "I would be quite happy to look after Ray if you were to discharge him," Fraser interrupted. "And I am sure Ray will feel more comfortable in his own home." Ray smiled gratefully at his partner. He turned his attention back to the doctor, his expression hopeful.

The doctor narrowed his eyes in thought looking from Ray to Fraser. Looking back to Ray he smiled warmly. "Alright. I'll discharge you to the Constable's care. But," the doctor sat down on the edge of the bed. "I will be giving the Constable strict instructions. And you are to do whatever he says." Ray nodded, the relief showing in his eyes. "That means no hot drinks or hard food, like pizza. Plenty of rest. Keep talking to a minimum. And definitely," the doctor grinned widely. "No shouting at your friend for any reason." Ray groaned in defeat, but nodded in silent agreement. "And I want to see you in a week to check on your progress. Have you any questions?" the doctor asked.

"Can I have ice-cream?" Ray croaked. "And jelly."

The doctor chuckled as he stood up patting Ray on the hand. "Yes. As much as you can eat of both," he replied. Ray beamed at him. "I'll just go and get your discharge papers," he said.

Turning to Fraser, the doctor motioned him towards the door. "He'll be very drowsy for a while due to the effects of the anaesthetic. And the pain could be quite severe for the first day or two," the doctor explained. "I don't think our friend over there," he pointed at Ray. "Has slept much recently. So if he wants to sleep, let him. It will do him good."

"Understood," Fraser nodded. "Can I give him anything for the pain?"

"I'll give you some soluble pain killers just in case the soreness gets too much for him," the doctor replied." Fraser listened carefully to the doctor's instructions, but kept one eye on his partner who was struggling impatiently to get out of bed. "And you're to bring him back here if his temperature goes up, or he's sick again," the doctor finished.

"Understood," Fraser nodded moving back towards his partner, who was gripping the edge of the bed to stop himself falling onto the floor. "I'll keep a close eye on him."

"I'm sure you will," the doctor said as he walked down the corridor.

**************

Fraser had helped Ray to dress, gently supporting him as they walked out of the hospital to hail a cab. Ray had fallen asleep, his head resting on Fraser's shoulder, during the short ride to his apartment. The cab drew up outside the building and Fraser reluctantly shook Ray awake. He supported his friend as he paid the driver. He then guided Ray slowly up the steps.

"Wanna sleep," Ray murmured hoarsely as his knees buckled on the top step.

Fraser caught Ray before he hit the floor, deciding the best option was to carry his friend. "I know Ray. Not much further. Then you can go to sleep again," Fraser promised lifting his friend into his arms.

"Mmmm. Nice," Ray croaked as he snuggled against Fraser's chest. Fraser tried not to grin foolishly as the warm glow bubbled up inside him again.

**************

Fraser carried Ray into his bedroom laying him gently on the bed. Fraser removed Ray's jeans, t-shirt and boots covering his friend up with the thick quilt. Ray immediately turned on his side, mumbling in his sleep.

Satisfied that Ray was comfortable, Fraser moved into the small kitchen to make himself a cup of tea. He checked the freezer smiling to himself; Ray had stocked up with several different flavours of ice-cream. Fraser busied himself making jelly and storing it in the refrigerator.

He checked on Ray before pouring himself a second cup of tea. Ray was fast asleep, his breathing deep and even. Fraser made himself comfortable on the couch, closing his eyes.

He was startled awake by a whimpering sound coming from the other room. "Ray," Fraser thought to himself as he hurried into the bedroom. Ray was lying on his back, drawing his legs up and down, his head moving from side to side. He was murmuring incoherently in his sleep. Fraser moved quickly over to the bed leaning over his friend. He ran his hand over Ray's forehead; Ray was hot his usually pale skin flushed. "Ray," Fraser gently shook Ray awake. "Ray."

"Hurts," Ray whimpered sleepily his eyes not fully focusing on Fraser.

"I know," Fraser soothed grabbing the glass from the night stand glad that he had thought to prepare the soluble painkiller earlier. "Try and drink some of this. It will help the pain," he encouraged supporting his partner as he sipped the mixture.

"Hurts," Ray cried pushing the glass away after a few sips. A single tear rolled down his flushed cheek. "Frase," he moaned.

"Ssshh," Fraser soothed sitting on the edge of the bed pulling Ray into a gentle embrace; he lightly rubbed his hand in a circular movement on Ray's sweat soaked back. Ray, still half asleep, continued to whimper softly in pain, his head resting on Fraser's shoulder.

Ten minutes later, Ray was still crying softly in pain despite Fraser's best efforts to comfort him. Fraser knew, from past experiences, that he would be unable to persuade his partner to return to the hospital. Desperate to soothe Ray's distress, and without thinking through the possible implications of his actions, Fraser gently pushed Ray back down onto the bed, rolling him onto his side. Ray whimpered in protest at the loss of contact.

Quickly removing his jeans and boots, Fraser slid into the bed drawing his slender partner towards him. Ray automatically cuddled closer to Fraser's warm body. Fraser didn't resist this time - he gently stroked the blonde hair whispering soft words of comfort until he felt Ray gradually relax into sleep. Fraser gently kissed Ray's forehead before closing his eyes waiting for sleep to claim him.

**************

The morning sunlight streamed through the crack in the curtains warming Ray's face. Keeping his eyes closed, he flinched slightly as he swallowed. His throat felt like he had swallowed broken glass, and now someone was rubbing the sides with sandpaper. His brain felt muddled, and it took him a while to remember the reason for the soreness. Ray felt hot and he shifted position to get more comfortable realising, with a jolt, that he was being held in a light embrace. It had been a long time since anyone had held him, and it felt strange and wonderful at the same time. Stifling a painful whimper, he finally opened his eyes surprised to find himself staring into the dark blue eyes of his partner.

"Good morning Ray," Fraser said. "How are you feeling?"

Ray opened his mouth to reply, but no sound came out. He tried harder, but his efforts made his throat hurt so he smiled hoping that Fraser would understand.

Fraser nodded in understanding. "Shall I get you some painkillers?" he asked his voice full of concern.

Ray shook his head not wanting to Fraser to leave the bed. He felt safe and secure for the first time in as long as he could remember. He didn't understand the feeling, and didn't want to analyse it; Ray just wanted to stay in Fraser's safe and warm embrace.

Fraser shifted slightly, his hand moving up towards Ray's forehead. "Mmmm," he muttered. "Still a bit hot. Are you sure you feel alright?"

Ray raised his eyes in mock exasperation nodding his head vigorously. He snuggled

closer to Fraser, closing his eyes. Fraser grinned to himself as Ray relaxed in his arms, sleep claiming him once more.

**************

Ray rolled onto his back, opening his eyes slowly. The bedroom was dim and he noticed that the curtains were still drawn tightly across the window. He was alone in bed. "Frase," he croaked sitting up. Groaning softly to himself, he swallowed cautiously; although he felt much better, his throat was still very painful.

He looked up smiling as Fraser appeared at the door, carrying two bowls. "Good evening Ray," he said walking towards the bed. Ray glanced at the bedside clock in surprise. "You slept the whole day away," Fraser grinned placing the bowls onto the bedside table. Fraser cocked his head to one side studying Ray carefully. "But I must say you look a bit better," he put his hand on Ray's forehead relieved to find the skin cool. "And your temperature has gone down." Ray flushed slightly, but remained silent as Fraser handed him one of the bowls. "Chocolate. Your favourite I believe," he said.

Ray nodded accepting the bowl of ice-cream. Fraser sat politely on the edge of the bed, quietly eating his strawberry ice-cream.

"Frase," Ray croaked looking at his friend. "Sorry about. Ya know crying.... crying like a little kid last night. Kinda stupid huh?"

Fraser held Ray's gaze. "Not in the least. You were in considerable pain. It was completely understandable," he sympathised. "I must admit that I too cried when I had my tonsils removed. And much more than you did."

"Ya did?" Ray sounded surprised.

"I did," Fraser confirmed taking another spoon of his ice-cream.

Ray became thoughtful for a moment. "Frase. How old were ya?" he asked.

Fraser blushed. "Well," he stammered shifting on the bed. "Well I do have to admit that... that I was only seven. But that doesn't alter the fact that a tonsillectomy is very painful whatever your age," he finished quickly. Ray shot Fraser his best dirty look but remained silent.

The partners descended into silence, each knowing that they needed to talk about the previous night, but each afraid to bring the subject up for fear of hurting the other.

Ray ate half his bowl of ice-cream before setting it to one side. Fraser noticed and frowned. "Ray. You need to eat something," he scolded lightly.

Ray adopted his best defiant face. "Hurts too much," he rasped. "And I wanna a shower," he swung his legs out of the bed. Ray swayed slightly as the room spun, and Fraser jumped up steadying him helping him towards the bathroom.

Twenty minutes later Ray emerged from the bathroom, a towel wrapped around his waist. Ray would never admit it to Fraser, but he still felt very tired and his throat ached. The hot shower, however, had made him feel much better, and it had given him a chance to wash away the sterile antiseptic smell of the hospital from his skin.

Glancing around his bedroom, Ray chuckled to himself; while he had been in the shower Fraser had tidied the room, remade the bed with neat hospital corners, plumped up the pillows and drawn the quilt down ready for Ray to easily slip back into the bed. It was tempting to slide into the bed and curl up in an effort to forget the pain, but for some reason that he didn't want to admit yet, Ray just wanted to be close to Fraser.

Ray pulled on a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt, and made his way into the living room. Fraser was sitting on the couch, a book in one hand, a mug of tea in the other. He looked up as Ray entered the room. "Ray. I thought you would go back to bed," he said studying his friend carefully. "You still look tired. And the sleep will do you good."

"Nah," Ray croaked. "Aint tired. Wanna watch some television."

"Of course," Fraser jumped up laying his book and mug on the coffee table. "Can I get you a cold drink? Some ice-cream? Or perhaps you would like some jelly? I made it myself," he babbled.

Ray put his hand up as he slumped onto the couch. "Frase. Just watching ya is making me feel tired," he muttered hoarsely. "Just sit down and finish yer tea. I'll have something later."

Fraser hovered over Ray, not sure what to do. "I'm sorry Ray. I was just...," he started to say.

"Frase," Ray interrupted as he patted the seat beside him. "Just sit down and watch some television with me."

"Understood," Fraser blushed sitting down. "What would you like to watch?"

"Ya choose," Ray said his eyes closing slightly.

Fraser picked up the television controller aiming it at the screen. "Well. There is a documentary on the plight of penguins in the wild," Fraser announced. "I think you would find it interesting."

Ray smiled weakly. "Whatever," he whispered. "Bring on the penguins."

Despite all his protests that he wasn't tired, Ray had fallen asleep half way through the documentary. Slumping sideways, his head was now resting on Fraser's solid shoulder.

Ray mumbled as Fraser shifted slightly so he could look at his partner. Ray's face remained pale, but Fraser noted that the lines of exhaustion seemed to be slowly disappearing. Fraser thought that the doctor was probably right that Ray hadn't slept much before the operation, and could imagine him laying awake at night terrified at the prospect of being forced to go to the hospital to have his tonsils removed.

Fraser smiled as he continued to study Ray; the noise and energy that was his friend was missing, and he thought that Ray looked serene and almost childlike in sleep.

Fraser shifted again, deciding that Ray would be more comfortable in bed, gently shaking him awake.

Ray blinked slowly focusing on Fraser's face. "Did they kill the penguins?" he asked sleepily.

"No Ray," Fraser grinned. "The penguins are all safe. It was a happy ending."

"Greatness," Ray stretched slightly. "Kinda like happy endings," he yawned forgetting that his throat was still sore. He stifled a painful whimper hoping that Fraser hadn't noticed.

"Ray," Fraser frowned. "Let me make you a painkiller."

"Don't fuss Frase. I'm good," Ray scowled.

"Ray," Fraser warned.

Ray sighed in defeat. "OK. Ya win. Go get a painkiller if it will make ya happy," he struggled to his feet making his way slowly towards the bedroom. "Bossy Mountie," he grumbled.

Fraser moved to the kitchen quickly mixing up the soluble painkiller before Ray changed his mind. He hurried to the bedroom; Ray was sitting on the edge of the bed, his eyes closed slightly.

"Thanks," he whispered accepting the glass Fraser offered him. He winced as he drank the mixture. "Uhhh yuk," he grimaced pulling a face.

Fraser suppressed a smirk. "I took the liberty of bringing you some candy," he handed Ray some M&Ms. "To help take away the taste."

Ray grinned slightly. "Ya think of everything Frase," he said accepting the candy. Holding his throat, he cautiously swallowed the bright coloured candy.

"Better?" Fraser smiled back.

"Yeh," Ray muttered looking down at his hands nervously. "Well actually," he stammered looking back up at Fraser. "Last night....," he started to say.

Fraser blushed bright red. "I am afraid I owe you an apology," Fraser interrupted. "But you were in so much pain. And it was the.... the only way I could think of to comfort you. I didn't..... I wasn't....," he babbled.

"Frase," Ray put his hand up to stop the Mountie continuing. "What I was gonna say before ya started blithering," he grinned nervously at Fraser. "Was that.... that it was.... ya know nice." Ray started to twiddle his fingers anxiously. " I was sorta wondering.... wondering if ya. Well ya know....," he stopped mid sentence his head bowed avoiding Fraser's eyes.

"Now who's blithering?" Fraser teased. Ray seemed to drop his head forwards even further. Fraser cocked his head to one side considering his partner knowing that one of them would have to take the first step. "Would you like me to hold you again tonight Ray?"

Ray jerked his head up in surprise at Fraser's offer. "Yeh," Ray whispered shyly his blue eyes hopeful as he eased himself under the heavy quilt. "If ya.... ya wanna."

Fraser made his mind up slipping out of his jeans and boots. "Yes I want to Ray," he answered joining his partner under the quilt. Pulling Ray towards him, Fraser enveloped him in a gentle embrace. "Better?" he whispered as he turned out the light.

"Mmmm. Much," Ray replied sleepily cuddling closer, feeling warm and secure.

**************

Waking early, Fraser silently watched as Ray slept. He tightened his embrace not wanting to let Ray go from his life ever. Ray murmured turning over to face Fraser his eyes opening slowly.

"Hi," he whispered, his voice low and husky.

"Good morning Ray," Fraser smiled. "Did you sleep well?"

"Mmmm," Ray murmured wiggling closer to Fraser's warmth. "It's sorta nice to be held. Seems ...... seems like a long time since.... since anyone cuddled me."

Fraser noted that Ray's voice seemed wistful and he tightened his embrace again. "It's been a long time since I held anyone. And I like holding you," he admitted quietly.

"Like ya holding me too," Ray whispered.

Fraser began to stroke Ray's back gently. "How do you feel?" he asked.

"Much better," Ray replied huskily. "Throat don't feel so sore today."

"Good. So you won't mind if I do this," Fraser declared leaning forward claiming Ray's lips in a gentle kiss, his hands still stroking the thin back.

Pulling back slightly. "No," Ray murmured against Fraser's lips. "Gonna do it again?"

Fraser grinned. "Yes Ray," he answered softly kissing his partner again. "But your throat. I don't want to hurt you."

"Ya won't," Ray rasped. "Kiss me again Mountie."

Fraser pulled Ray closer as they kissed passionately lost in a sudden desire for each other. Panting slightly they pulled apart facing each other gazing into the other's eyes searching for, and finding, love and trust shining outwards.

"Want ya," Ray murmured leaning forward to kiss Fraser. He licked his tongue along Fraser's lips requesting entry. Fraser opened his mouth moaning as Ray licked and sucked at his tongue; at the same time he ran his hands up and down Fraser's body, feeling the firm muscles of his back and arms.

Rolling Ray onto his back, Fraser straddled the slender body. Gently the two men explored one another's body, stripping each other naked tossing the discarded clothes on the floor.

Fraser gently ran his tongue across Ray's lips. Ray whimpered with need as Fraser traced a path gently down his chin and neck, careful not to hurt his partner. He bit gently at Ray's shoulder marking him. Ray arched his back off the bed as Fraser rubbed his growing arousal against his own hardening cock. "Oh God Ben," he breathed. "Do that again."

"Like that?" Fraser asked as he nuzzled Ray's shoulder.

"Mmmm," Ray sighed rotating his hips, which caused Fraser to squeak in ecstasy.

Fraser thrust his tongue gently into Ray's mouth exploring carefully as he rubbed their erections together causing a delightful friction.

"Tonsils are gone Ben," Ray moaned as his tongue met Fraser's.

Fraser pulled back giggling silently. "Can't blame me for trying," he teased kissing Ray's nose. Ray beamed pulling Fraser back down for another passionate kiss.

Fraser rolled them onto their sides again. Moving his hand between their sweat soaked bodies, he grasped Ray's erection firmly in his fist. Stroking up and down the hardness, Fraser delighted in hearing the small murmurs that Ray was making in encouragement. He couldn't help moaning loudly as Ray seized his cock running his slender fingers along the sensitive underside of his penis. Moving his hand downwards, Ray gently fondled Fraser's balls rolling them between his fingers.

Fraser leaned forward capturing Ray's lips in a tender kiss, his hand continuing to stroke Ray's penis. Ray continued to stroke Fraser matching the rhythm the Mountie had set. They thrust into each other's hands delighting in the new feelings they had discovered. Both men were moaning each other's name, the bedroom filled with the sound of their tender love making.

Ray ran his thumb over the sensitive head of Fraser's cock sending the Mountie over the edge towards ecstasy. Fraser cried out Ray's name as his penis pulsed spurting his semen between their bodies and over Ray's hand. Feeling Fraser come sent Ray spiralling towards his orgasm. Thrusting his cock forwards into Fraser's hand, he released his seed with a hoarse cry.

Both men lay panting trying to get their breath back. Fraser recovered first and cleaned them up with his discarded t-shirt. Ray kissed him gently pulling Fraser into an embrace. They lay cuddled together in silence, content to be in each other's company.

"Frase," Ray murmured against his neck. "I love ya."

"Good. I'm glad," Fraser answered propping himself up on his elbow looking down at Ray. "Because I love you too Ray." Fraser leaned forward kissing Ray tenderly.

Pulling back from the kiss, Fraser stroked Ray's face and neck softly. "I'm glad you had your tonsils out."

Ray pulled a face. "Ohh so am I. Ya know... I really enjoyed the hospital, the pain, being sick, being hot, crying like ... like a little kid. The pain," he answered his voice still husky. "Oh yeah. Then there's my voice sounding kinda stupid."

"I didn't mean it quite like that Ray," Fraser silenced his partner with a finger on his lips. "I have loved you for a long time. But I was afraid to tell you in case you hated me." Ray went to open his mouth, but Fraser kept his finger on his lips. "I know this will sound silly. But you being ill gave me courage. You needed me, and I needed you. Does that make sense?" he asked releasing his finger.

"Yes Ben,"Ray nodded. "It makes sense in a Canadian sorta way," he teased. Fraser grinned foolishly at Ray, his heart bursting with love. Ray's expression turned serious. "Will ya.... ya stay?" he croaked not being able to mask the fear in his eyes.

"Of course, I'll stay," Fraser replied smiling. "Forever. If you want me to."

"I want," Ray replied returning the smile. "Told ya I liked happy endings."

"As do I," Fraser leant down claiming Ray's lips once again in a passionate kiss. "And Ray," he murmured against the pale skin. "I like your voice husky. It's very.... very sexy," he said.

"Sexy. Huh?" Ray knocked Fraser's elbow from under him pushing Fraser over onto his back. Rolling on top of Fraser, Ray thrust his awakening arousal against Fraser's thigh.

"Oh yes," Fraser moaned loudly. "Very sexy."

THE END

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