WARNING: PG-rated, M/M situation implied. Follows "How Am I Supposed To Live Without You?", "The Beat of a Different Drum", "On My Own", "Blue Moon," "Living in the Real World," "Clutching at a Dream," "Libera Me," any and all versions of "Last Night of the World," "What I Did for Love," "Angel of the Morning," and "Matchmaker, Matchmaker."
Sorry this part took so long! RL and stage fright conspired to intervene...
Well turns out the guys were at least talking to each other after that last part... and they let me overhear.
Yeah, they're talking... "only" talking, you might say... but, let's face it-- they angsted for so long without talking, this is what they *really* needed to do.
This is it, guys. It's been fun! I appreciate all the harassing comments and random death threats that made me finish it. I'd love to go on and see how they deal with the world, but that would take another whole cycle in itself and I've got other stuff I have to obsess on for a while now. Maybe someday, though....
Again, no song. What can I say... pick "Song Cycle" for a name and all the songs go bye-bye from my brain. Why is this my life??? <g>
So once again and as always:
DISCLAIMER: Not mine-- (Goddess, I wish! ;-) No offense or
trespass intended and no profit made, I assure you.
"Vecchio."
"Hello, Ray."
"Benny?"
"I... I need to speak with you."
"Yeah. I'll come pick you up."
"I'd appreciate that."
"Ray, why are we stopping."
"We're not talking this way, are we? The lake's as good a place as any for a walk." <pause> "I like it here....Besides, Fuzz-face looks like he could use a run."
"He has been cooped up in quarantine for some time now. I'm sure he'd appreciate it."
"Hey, anytime.... <oof> Yeah, yeah, you're welcome, you big hairball. Happy to be out of the lock-up, huh?"
"Ray, I'm sorry about that morning. I shouldn't have just left like that."
"Look, Benny, we both knew what would happen."
"I'm afraid I was a coward, Ray."
"Yeah, well you're not the one who had to talk himself out of having this conversation while you were on statue duty."
<smile> "I appreciate your restraint."
"Yeah, well you should."
"Look, I'm the one who should be apologizing, Benny."
"For what?"
"For that night... I shouldn't have pushed." <sigh> "I should have just let you go, without giving you one more thing to regret, you know?"
"I don't regret anything about that night, Ray."
"No?"
"No." <pause> "Do you...?"
"Not a second, Benny. Not one single second...."
"Because I know that the Catholic church is quite emphatic...."
"Do you think what we did was a sin, Benny? Something evil and vile that's gonna end us both in Hell?"
<pause> "No, Ray."
"Yeah, well neither do I, o.k.? <pause> <laugh> Besides, Ma already cleared it with the priest."
"...?"
"Yeah, Ma went and told Father Behan about us and he said it was cool... as long as we were in love. <pause> And we were in love, Benny, weren't we?"
"I still am, Ray."
<smile> "Yeah, Benny, me too. Me too."
"Ray, I didn't want to have to do this... I mean to have to...."
"You don't have to say it, Benny, I know, o.k.?"
"I'm afraid not, Ray."
"Excuse me?"
"I mean, I do have to say it. I'm afraid I... well ... I made a promise that I would tell you."
"A prom... oh God! Ma got to you too, didn't she?"
"She can be... well... rather determined, Ray..."
<laugh>"Yeah, that's one way to put it...."
"So I. .. well I mean to say... why I left, Ray... I...."
"Really, Benny, it's o.k. I know. You deserve so much better...."
"Excuse me?"
"You're the best cop I know, Benny, and Canada's damn lucky to have you. You deserve so much better than this pathetic excuse for a job they make you do here."
"I like what I do here, Ray..."
"Oh come on! Picking up the Dragon Lady's dry-cleaning? Playing statue all day? You deserve to go home where you can be a real cop, Benny. Back to Paulatuk or Runamukluk or wherever it is you want to be. You've got a life, Benny, and you miss home. You always have."
"Ray, it's true that I miss Canada, and I always will, but it's not enough. "
"Well it's got to be better than this!"
"It is more challenging than my consulate position here, Ray...." <smile> "But then most things are."
"Well it's about time you admitted that!"
"But I don't think that you understand what my posting in a place like Paulatuk actually entails, Ray...."
"Look, Benny, I know I rag on you about Canada, but I realize you've got to be doing great things up there. Hell, you probably stopped some international drug-smuggling ring or saved an entire town single-handed, right? Because, you know, if anyone could do something like th...."
"No, Ray."
"Did you just interrupt me?"
"Yes, Ray, I believe I did."
"That's rude!"
"Yes, Ray, I know."
"Well?"
"'Well', what, Ray?"
"Well, aren't you gonna apologize? Blush? Throw yourself on your Mountie sword or something?"
"No, Ray."
"Well why the hell not?"
"You did interrupt me as well, Ray."
"Oh, so that makes it all right?"
"Well, no, not technically...."
"Besides, I do that all the time!"
"I know, Ray."
"You're not gonna apologize, are you?"
"No, Ray."
"Geez, teach a Mountie to stand up for himself and you pay, and pay...."
"As I was saying..."
"And pay, and pay...."
"Are you finished mocking me, Ray?"
<grin> "Yeah, I'm done. For now anyway. So tell me, what does the wild life of a Paulatuk posting involve, Benny?"
"Waiting."
"Waiting?"
"In essence. There is patrolling to be done, of course. On occasion a minor scofflaw to detain, or a civilian in need of aid. But mostly it consists of waiting. Being available should something occur." <smile> "Not many high-speed chases, Ray."
"Oh. Well, but that's what you get for going out in the boonies, Benny. I'm sure a post in Toronto or Ottawa or something...."
"No."
"No?"
"Not yet, anyway. The... the political climate for me is still, well, rather 'cold', Ray."
"Dammit, Benny! When is the RCMP gonna get their heads out of their goddamned...."
"Ray! Please."
<sigh> "Sorry. But when are they gonna realize what they've got in you? Huh?"
"You know, when I came to Chicago, I was... well I was scared, Ray."
"Scared?"
"Yes. This was by far the largest city I'd ever been posted to-- and in a foreign country, no less. I knew the wilderness-- how to survive for days in sub-zero temperatures, how to track man or beast across rock, snow, and ice. But what did I know about a big city?"
"You did just fine."
"Thanks to you."
"Hey, I only gave you some pointers." <grin> "And half the time you didn't listen to me anyway."
"No, Ray. I always listened."
"So you mean you just made a habit of ignoring me, is that it?
<smile>
"Oh well I feel much better...." <grin>
"I owe quite a debt of gratitude to Leftenant Welsh, as well, of course."
"Welsh? For what?"
"For allowing me to work on your cases with you."
"Oh yeah, he gets the best cop in Canada solving his cases for him for free and he's gonna be complaining?"
"Well technically I don't have any jurisdiction...."
"Not to mention he thinks he's got you baby-sitting me...."
"....And for some reason, those cases in which I assist seem to somehow... well...."
"Get really strange?"
"Something like that, yes."
"Look, Benny, Welsh's only problem is that he can't figure out why you keep hanging around doing it. For that matter, half the time I don't know why you do it."
"Well, aside from taking advantage of the opportunity to spend time with you...."
"Ooooh, flattery will get you everywhere, Benny...." <grin>
<smile> "Aside, from that, Ray. It allows me to act as a police officer again. Unofficially, of course, but ...." <sigh>
"But you get to be a real cop again, huh?"
"Yes."
"O.K., I think I get it. So, if you're having such a great time chasing down the scum of the earth in Chicago, then why the hell are you leaving? Huh?"
"Ray, I...."
"No." <sigh> "Geez, look. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to...."
"I'm leaving because of you Ray."
"Me?"
"Ray, I meant what I said that first morning in your car: There's nothing that would make me happier than to be with you for the rest of our lives. But I can't ask you to do that."
"To do what?"
"To give up everything you would have to give up for me, Ray. You have so much that's important to you, that's a part of you-- your family, your career, your faith. Being with me would put them all at risk and I can't let you do that for me."
"Whoa! Wait a minute, Benny. I decide what's worth what in my life, capisce? "
"Ray, I only meant that...."
"Besides, you left the most important thing off your little list. You."
"Ray, I...."
"No, that's what important to me, Benny. That's what's a part of me: my family, my church, my job, and you. And somehow they're just gonna have to work it all out because I'm not givin' any of them up, understand? Not without one hell of a fight."
"But, Ray...."
"'But 'nothing! Look, I already told you-- I can't believe we're goin' to Hell for love. And besides, if I were gonna do it, that'd definitely be the way to go, right?" <grin> "Ma's practically adopted you already, and she's doing everything short of passing love notes to keep us together. And if you know anything about an Italian mother, Benny, you know that's all we're gonna need." <sigh> "The job... well it's probably gonna be tough, I know that, but I can take it, o.k.? Believe me, you're worth any stupid-ass comments I get there."
"It's not just comments, Ray."
"No, it'll probably be 'fag' jokes and condoms on my desk too, but I can live with it. O.k.?"
"What if you can't?"
"I can, Benny...."
"I mean what if it affects the way they see you. The way they support you."
"Benny...."
"What if you call for backup one day and it's late, Ray? Late because of who you choose to love? What if... . I don't think I could live with that, Ray...."
"Benny... Hey, look at me. Welsh may be many things, but he's a good cop, a good boss. Whatever he thinks about this-- about us-- he's not gonna put up with shit like that. Trust me, o.k.?"
"Ray...."
"Besides, who's always my back-up anyway?"
"Well, depending on the current duty roster...."
"You are, Benny. O.K.? With you watching my back life may get damned weird, but at least I know I'm covered. So stop worrying, o.k.? I've got Ma to do that already, remember?"
"Rosa only wants you to be happy, Ray."
"'Rosa'? You call my mother 'Rosa' now?"
<blush> "Well... she insisted, Ray."
"Wow."
"Wow?"
"Yeah, wow. That's what she told Angie the day we got engaged."
"Oh. Wow."
<grin> "Yeah, Benny. Wow."
<finis>-- yes, for real ;-)
TYK, all! ;-)
Dianne
Dianne la Mercenaire... -*- <cat.goddess@pobox.com>
Vanity Web Page-- http://moonlight.dreamhost.com/lamerc/
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