Due South and all of its characters belong to Alliance Communications.

Story page: http://users4.50megs.com/callie/

YOU HAVE MAIL

"Damn ya," Ray Kowalski cursed under his breath as the computer blinked twice deleting the report he had spent the last hour typing with two fingers. He slumped back in his chair casting his best dirty looks at the hateful machine. The shrill ringing of the telephone interrupted his thoughts of revenge.

"Squad room," Ray barked, his angry scowl turning into a foolish grin as he heard Fraser's voice on the other end. "Hiya Ben," his voice becoming softer.

"Good evening Ray," Fraser said. "Are you alright? You sound a bit agitated."

"Yeah, I'm great Ben," Ray glared at the computer. "Except that this stupid bunch of junk just went and ate my report. It hates me Ben," he whined.

"Ahhh I see," Fraser chuckled. "So I take it that you are still battling with the new computer system that the CPD installed?" he teased.

"Yeah," Ray grumbled. "And when I get hold of the joker whose idea it was, I am gonna kick 'em in the head."

"Ray," Fraser scolded lightly. "You just have to exercise a little patience. And I am quite sure that you haven't lost your report completely."

"Well I aint good at patience," Ray interrupted. "The only thing that don't hate me is the e-mail thingy. I got that tamed. Even got a reply to my request for some information from Central Records."

"So the system doesn't completely hate you?" Fraser teased. "And from what I have seen of the new system, it automatically backs up what you have entered. It's standard on new systems. And very efficient."

"So Mr. Computer Whizzkid. Why don't ya come over here, and tell it to give me my report back. I'll make it worth yer while," Ray lowered his voice. "I'll show ya a good time when we're alone."

"Ray," Fraser stammered. Ray laughed; he could picture Fraser blushing as red as his uniform.

Ray swung his chair around, turning his back to the squad room. "Love ya Ben," he whispered, his voice husky with desire. "Our bed's lonely without ya. Miss cuddling up to ya. Hate it when yer on nights and I'm on days."

"As do I," Fraser agreed.

"But then after tonight, we're both on days. So we can spend our nights together," Ray breathed. "Ya and me in our bed. Just don't count on getting too much sleep Mr. I'll lick ya to death Mountie."

Ray grinned as he heard Fraser catching his breath. "Understood," Fraser replied as he cleared his throat. "But we really shouldn't be discussing this on an official line. Someone could be monitoring the calls, or listening in. And we did agree that we would keep our relationship private and out of our respective work places."

"Yeah I know. Guess ya right, as always," Ray bit his bottom lip guiltily. "But sometimes I just wish....," he started to say, the tone of his voice wistful.

"Wish what?" Fraser interrupted.

"Nothing," Ray sighed to himself. After six wonderful months together as lovers, Fraser still couldn't say the words to him. Ray loved Fraser and he knew that Fraser loved him, but just once he wanted Fraser to drop his Mountie reserve and say the words to him over the telephone, in the street, in public; Ray didn't care - he just needed Fraser to say it, needed Fraser to "play" with him sometimes. Ray knew that the yearning inside him was silly, but it would make him feel secure, loved and needed. "It don't matter.... it's not important. Now tell me," Ray quickly changed the subject. "How do I get this report back?" Fraser spent the next ten minutes calmly talking Ray through the process of retrieving his document, amidst a string of curses and threats to the computer's well-being.

"Yer the best Ben," Ray grinned as his missing document finally re-appeared on the screen. "Must have done something right in my life somewhere along the line to get ya."

"Thank you kindly," Ray could hear the smile in Fraser's voice at the compliment. "I think I did too."

"Ya think?" Ray asked hopefully.

"Definitely," Fraser replied. "Now I really have to go Ray. There's lots to do before the reception tonight, and the guests will start arriving soon. Don't wait up for me."

"OK," Ray replied grinning mischievously. "But I'll keep yer side of the bed warm for ya."

"Ray," Fraser scolded lightly, but Ray could hear the smile in his voice. "Oh by the way I have left Diefenbaker at home as he tends to get in the way. I fed him before I left so you are not to give him any junk food or doughnuts," Fraser instructed.

"Understood," Ray mimicked one of Fraser's sayings. "I promise we'll both be good."

"I sincerely doubt that you two know how to be good," Fraser teased. "I am still trying to work out who incites who to mischief."

"Hey. It's not me," Ray protested grinning. "It's all Dief's fault."

"Mmm," Fraser muttered distracted; Ray could hear another voice wailing in the background. "Yes I be there in a minute," Ray heard Fraser saying.

"Ray," Fraser's voice came back on the line. "Turnbull needs me now. Something about burnt canapes. So I'll have to go. Sleep well, and I'll see you in the morning. Good night Ray."

"Night Ben," Ray replied. "Love ya." Ray sighed heavily to himself as he heard the click of the receiver, ending their conversation.

**************

Fraser stared at the telephone after hanging up. "I love you too Ray," he thought to himself. "Now why couldn't you just say that to him?" he chastised himself as he got up pacing up and down the small office. Fraser loved Ray, but having been hurt in the past, he couldn't seem to bring himself to say the words, and he knew that Ray needed to hear them, that it was important to him to feel loved and wanted.

"You suck," he mimicked one of Ray's favourite sayings. Fraser glanced down at this watch as a thought struck him. "I have time before the guests start to arrive, and damn the canapes," Fraser cursed. "Turnbull will just have to cope on his own for once," he thought to himself as he sat back down at his desk turning on his computer.

**************

Ray ambled back into the squad room, a cup of coffee in his hand. Slumping down at his desk, he rummaged in one of the untidy drawers for his candy. He stared distractedly at the computer screen, thinking about Fraser, as he dropped the candy into the murky coloured coffee.

Putting his coffee to one side he slipped his glasses on. Opening a file, Ray began to slowly type the details onto the pre-loaded form. As his eyes swept across the screen to the open file, his eyes caught the flashing "you have mail" icon at the top of the screen.

Using his mouse, Ray carefully clicked on the icon using opening his mail account. He grinned to himself; Fraser had sent him a message. "Probably instructions about Dief and doughnuts," he thought to himself as he opened the message.

Ray scanned the message quickly, his mouth dropping open in surprise. Scrolling to the top of the message again, he read it slowly, a foolish happy smile appearing on his face as he took in each line.

Ray,

I know that it frustrates you that I cant seem to say the words you want me too. So I thought that I would do what I do best, write it down for you, and hope that you will forgive me for my cowardice.

You came into my life out of the blue, when I was least expecting it. My life was so lonely, and after Victoria I had given up all hope of ever finding love again. But on that first day you hugged me, and I knew then I could never let you go; that I would be yours forever.

I know I am not always easy to understand and sometimes I am hard to be around, but love seems to have found a way. You love me for who I am, never judging me, your faith in me always unwavering. You look deep into my soul seeing things in me that no-one else can see.

Ray, you are so open and loving and treat me the best that you can, giving your love and laughter freely and generously without thought of anything in return. You tell me, all the time, that you love me, need me and want me, and I am envious of the ease with which you say the words.

Your love for me opened a door I thought was closed to me forever, and it still amazes me, and must confess that sometimes I just can't believe that I could be so blessed to have someone like you in my life. You are so much more than you think you are - strong, brave, gentle and loving at the same time.

You have changed my life so much. I live for your touch, your smile, and I know that you are all that I'll ever need in my life. You bring out the best in me.

Never doubt that I love you. Remember that the words are always in my heart, and I carry them wherever I go. You are the best part of me, and quite simply I love you with all my heart.

Ben

PS. Don't feed Diefenbaker any doughnuts........ Alright, he can have one!

Ray removed his glasses wiping absently at his eyes with his sleeve as he finished reading the letter. He chuckled at the last sentence. "Oh Ben," he thought to himself as he glanced around the squad room; it was relatively empty. He hit the "print" button, hurrying over to the printer waiting impatiently for the message to appear. Carefully tearing off the paper, Ray moved back to his desk deleting the message and turning the computer off.

Ray shrugged into his jacket placing the folded sheet of paper into the inside pocket. Waving to Welsh, Ray headed towards the parking lot. Gunning the engine, he screeched out into the busy traffic pointing the GTO in the Consulate's direction.

Thirty minutes later, Ray drew up outside the Consulate. He could see that guests for the reception had started to arrive. Parking the GTO between two limousines, he slid out of the driving seat. Locking the vehicle, he ran up the steps nodding to Turnbull as he headed towards the back of the Consulate and Fraser's office.

The door was open, and Fraser was standing at his filing cabinet with his back to the door. Ray marched into the office, and Fraser turned in surprise. Before, he could utter a word, Ray had pushed him up against the cabinet. The drawer closed with a metallic bang as Ray embraced Fraser pulling him close. Leaning forward, Ray claimed Fraser's lips in a passionate kiss full of love and warmth. Fraser moaned leaning into the embrace, wrapping his arms around Ray, deepening the kiss as their tongues duelled and caressed.

Breathless, the partners broke free smiling shyly at each other. "You got my message then?" Fraser said smiling warmly as he tightened his hold on Ray.

"Nah," Ray teased, his blue eyes twinkling with mischief. "What message would that be?"

"The one that said I love you," Fraser smiled again.

"Oh that one," Ray beamed, his whole face lighting up at the words. "Yeah got that one," he replied patting his jacket pocket. "Right here. And that's where it's gonna stay."

"Understood," Fraser said as he leaned forward capturing Ray's lips in another kiss.

THE END

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