Comments made to me regarding 'Redemption' forced me to obey my muse write a seventh part to my Vortex series (TYK, Gezebel, for the series title!!!). Again, from Fraser's POV. I really mean for this to be the last, but knowing my luck I'll never get out of this dark hole. :-) Implied violence warning. Open ended finale--ie. make of it what you will. *G*

Something Must End

By: Raven

The nights are empty of everything but the thoughts that plague me.

I cannot forgive myself. Perhaps if I could explain to myself why I did it. But it is incomprehensible even to me.

No one but Kowalski knows that I am a monster. I'd like to keep it that way. Not that I deserve it.

His silence is deplorable. I wish he wouldn't lie. That he'd tell people I'm the one who put him in the shape he's in. I wish he'd make me pay for what I did. Until I have atoned, there will no light at the end of this long, dark tunnel.

It is my fault he will not punish me. I am the one who broke him.

It has been a long time since I fired my weapon. It is warm in my hands while the bullets are cool. All it will take is one, but I load the chamber fully.

Any man who could live with what I did is no man.

Something must end tonight.

Finally, after so much time, I am at peace. I leave him a long letter of apology. Perhaps, in time, he will understand what I did to him. He will understand that it is not his fault. I wish that I could be there when he becomes angry. At least, I know he is not like me. His anger will spill onto a punching bag, not a helpless victim.

The pressure against my temple is soothing.

So is the darkness that follows.