The House Fan Fiction Archive

 

Things The Lunchlady Hears


by AndreaLyn


I.

"Two coffees."

She rings it up, checking the size. Large and a Large. There are a few creams and sugars on the tray, but given that she knows for a fact how bad the coffee is, she supposes they can be excused.

"Come on, aren't you the least bit curious?" Dr. Wilson asks, his voice teasing. She keys in the price of the coffees, trying to appear bland and blas, always ignoring the conversations. She's not meant to hear; she's meant to be wallpaper. "Usually you tease me about my dates for hours."

He slides the tray along, grabbing a few stir sticks.

"Am I your new gossip line?" Dr. House scoffs. "Do I get the news and immediately telephone it down the wire? Oh, Cuddy won't be able to contain herself when she hears the news!"

"It's not just gossip. I like her."

Dr. House grins, digging through his pockets for change. "Like her as in, `will you be the next Mrs. Wilson?' or is she only going to get to the pre-engagement part?" He digs up quarters at a time, placing them into her open palm. When Dr. House hears the aggravated murmurs from somewhere down the line, he slows down in his search. "What's her name? Julie. Strong name. Julie Wilson! Now there's a...a...what do you call it...oh, right, a temporary name. Don't forget to buy a temporary tattoo. You might be a genius when it comes to oncology, but your skin must hurt from getting all those tattoo removals with the divorce. You're no dermatological whiz-kid."

Dr. Wilson shakes his head, placing two crisp dollar bills into her palm. "Every day, I forget how funny you are," he remarks dryly, sharing a smile with the lunchlady as he picks up their coffees and makes his way off.

Dr. House turns to her. "He's upset," he confides in a stage whisper. "He's only getting pre-commitment sex. He won't be happy until she marries him."

She hides her laugh as the next Doctor gives her a salad to ring through.

II.

"Ding, dong," Dr. House sneers. "So there were wedding bells. Did I really have to show up? And I wore a suit, just for you. You owe me big time."

"Yeah," Dr. Wilson laughs, the smile on his face contagious. She smiles back as she glances at the trays and begins tallying up their lunch. "You still wore your runners. And you popped a pill in the middle of my vows. The priest glared at you. I think he was blessing your soul before its inevitable trip into hell."

"What, just my soul?" Dr. House says, outraged. She rings up two lunches and gets separate payment this time, clean bills from Dr. Wilson, dirty and rumpled twenty from Dr. House. "I've worked hard enough to earn a full-body trip there, don't you think?"

"Cuddy would agree. I heard you flipped her off in front of a patient," Dr. Wilson slowly says with incredulity. By the look on Dr. House's face, the lunchlady would wager that the story is true. "Oh god, you did. Why?" Dr Wilson sighs and shares a quick look with her, a look that speaks and breathes `why must I put up with him?' before carrying the conversation further in the eating area.

"There are many reasons, grasshopper, and you..."

III.

"Did you hear?" Dr. Chase takes his time selecting lunch. He always does; even though four times out of five, he just ends up with a salad and something caffeinated. Dr. Cameron doesn't seem to mind though. She takes the time to browse the sandwiches, bent over and ever studious in her glasses. The lunchlady would like glasses like that. Like the Wizard giving her intelligence-imbued spectacles.

She takes a moment to stand. "Hear what?"

"Apparently, Doctor House stayed the night at Doctor Wilson's," Dr. Chase relays the information with a wicked grin and the lunchlady has to hold in the catch of her breath. There's a part of her mind telling her that she absolutely has got to tell the girls in the kitchen about this. There had been rumors of Dr. Wilson's marriage hitting the rocks and whispers about Dr. House contributing to that, but this proof is better than a twelve hour night of sleep after a grueling shift. "He came in tousled and quite mussed up in the same clothes. I overheard Cuddy confirming that House was at Wilson's the night before. You think his wife knew?"

"Do they even talk anymore?" Dr. Cameron snorts, a tiny pained look lingering in her eyes. She seems to shake it off quickly. "House and Wilson?" she questions quietly. "Are you sure? I mean...they're just good friends."

"Yeah, but have you overheard some of their arguments?" Dr. Chase questions, finally picking a salad. "They act like an old married couple."

"We all do," Dr. Cameron scoffs. "It's a side-effect of this place."

"Point taken."

He smiles politely and pays for his meal, waiting as Dr. Cameron pays for hers and they take off, walking side-by-side and confiding in whispers about the latest of these newest rumors. The lunchlady glances at the clock and bites hard on her lip, counting down every last minute until she can tell the others about this.

IV.

"Lisa," Dr. Wilson is pleading, quietly, seriously, but she hears. She hears, but she ignores. "Lisa, please, you don't understand."

"Doctor Wilson," Dr. Cuddy is brisk and professional as she always appears as she slides her tray down the line, selecting items as she goes. "I don't see why a personal matter like this should influence your professional life. You're both mature, sensible..." she pauses and furrows her brow. After a moment, she gives a tiny groan in her husky voice, grasping an apple in her palm. "Well, you are a mature and sensible adult. I'm sure you can separate..."

"I kissed him, Lisa," Dr. Wilson cuts her off, his voice stringent and terse. "Julie was gone for the night because we'd fought and Greg was over and I...I kissed him." He lets out a groan. "God, how could I be such an idiot!"

They approach her and their conversation diminishes to quiet whispers that she can't quite hear. Dr. Cuddy's tone rises until it's audible once or twice, but for the most part, Dr. Wilson's pained expression tells stories all its own. Volumes of novels could be written by that knit expression of pain on his face. She gives him a sympathetic smile and the pain dissipates from his face - just for a moment - and he's all smiles again, like he always is. Dr. Wilson is the nicest man in the hospital and that's common knowledge.

She also knows he's the only man that Dr. Gregory House considers a friend.

"Talk to him," Dr. Cuddy suggests. She pays without eye contact and hurries off, presumably back to her office.

Dr. Wilson pauses before he pays and stops right in front of her. "Have you ever been in love with the wrong person?" he asks absently, digging through money in his wallet for the right change.

She shakes her head. "No," she shrugs. "I figure if you're in love with them, it's not the wrong person in your mind."

That gets a small laugh before Dr. Wilson heads off.

V.

"Greg!" Dr. Wilson hisses and heads over with a lunch tray in his hands, chasing Dr. House down the line - and it isn't very hard with Dr. House being impaired by the cane. "What was with that note? This isn't one of your soap operas, you know, you don't just leave at first light because it's dramatic."

Dr. House looks around, his expression calm. "C'mon, not here, okay?"

"Not here? Dear James," Dr. Wilson takes out a piece of paper and begins to read aloud, loud enough for just Dr. House and her to hear. "I understand that you won't understand this, not right now, but you've got a wife and a life to worry about. That's why I need to back off and let you be."

"Yeah," Dr, House clears his throat.

"This is the part where you're being a self-sacrificing asshole," Dr. Wilson scoffs. "Good to know." He shoves the paper in Dr. House's hands and storms off with his tray - filled with food that she's supposed to charge him for. But she doesn't say a word because he's walking like a man who's got nothing left. She gives Dr. House a small, nervous smile, watching as he carefully folds the piece of paper and hands her enough money to cover both lunches.

"Dr. House," she calls out, a little nervous as she wrings her hands. She's heard things.

He turns slowly, raises an eyebrow. "No, I don't want to hear about the specials."

"He just...uh..."

"He'll get it someday," Dr. House replies quickly, leaning on his cane as he balances his tray and moves on. "It's usually the geniuses that take the longest to know what's good for them."

And Dr. Wilson is nothing if not a boy wonder.

VI.

One day, she stops overhearing things between Dr. Wilson and Dr. House.

That's the day she starts seeing the looks.

END

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Legal Disclaimer: The authors published here make no claims on the ownership of Dr. Gregory House and the other fictional residents of Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital. Like the television show House (and quite possibly Dr. Wilson's pocket protector), they are the property of Fox Television, David Shore and undoubtedly other individuals of whom I am only peripherally aware. The fan fiction authors published here receive no monetary benefit from their work and intend no copyright infringement nor slight to the actual owners. We love the characters and we love the show, otherwise we wouldn't be here.