Jim was quiet for a moment, studying the shattered young man before him. Blair held his head in his hands, shoulders slumped. Jim had never seen his young partner in such a state. Unable to think of anything better to say, Jim asked gently, "Want some noodles?" as he offered the bowl and chopsticks.

Blair looked up at his partner. He could see the concern in the detective's blue eyes. He also knew that Jim would never come right out and tell Blair how he felt. How sorry he was that Blair had lost any chance at happiness with Maya. That just wasn't Jim's style, to reveal his heart. But he didn't have to, Blair realized with a sigh. That innocent little inquiry spoke volumes. Blair took a deep breath and said shakily, "Not right now, OK Jim?" No noodles, no talking, no pity, nothing. He just needed to be alone.

Jim smiled gently, and left the room without another word. As he walked back to the kitchen to join Drennan, his Sentinel ears picked up the sound of Blair moving to lie back on his bed. Jim listened harder, and heard the little scratching sound of Blair rubbing his index finger over his thumbnail, a nervous habit Jim had witnessed before. But most of all, Jim heard the choked, stifled sound of sobs being forced down. The big man closed his eyes at the painful sounds. Poor kid.

Jim turned off the TV, stood up, and stretched. He glanced at his watch and saw that it was nearly midnight. Time for bed. Drennan had gone home hours ago, and Blair had never emerged from his room, so Jim had enjoyed a peaceful evening to himself. Well, not really enjoyed, knowing Blair was so upset. Now he moved about turning out the lights, locking up. He paused outside Blair's room, listening to the deep, even breathing of his sleeping partner. Jim poked his head in the door, and sighed.

Blair was curled up on his side on the little bed, tears drying in shiny streaks on his face, wet spots on the pillow indicating that he'd been crying for some time before falling asleep. Jim crossed the room, knelt, and gently removed Blair's sneakers. Then he reached for the blanket folded at the foot of the bed and laid it carefully over the young man's body. Jim stood up to leave, and paused. Almost as an afterthought, he reached down and laid his big hand on the side of Blair's head, gently tousling the dark curls, hoping to rub comfort into his partner through his touch. Blair stirred slightly, then settled back into sleep. With a final pat to Blair's shoulder, Jim left the room and went upstairs to bed.

Ellison snapped awake with a start, Sentinel eyes instantly scanning the dark loft for the source of the sound he'd heard. He listened intently, and heard it again.

"Please... (sob). Please... someone... stay with me....,"

Blair's voice, whimpering softly. Jim kicked the blankets aside, shrugged into his robe, and moved quickly down the stairs to Blair's room.

The nightmare was one Blair had suffered before. He was happy, surrounded by people who loved him. There was Christine, smiling at him with such love, all the bad feelings about Lash gone and forgotten. There also were Ann, Katie, Michelle... all Blair's previous girlfriends, back from wherever they had disappeared to, all gazing at him with love and forgiveness. Blair turned and saw Pete, and Eric, two of his Mom's male friends that he'd been particularly close to. Even Stephen was there, the one man that Blair had been able to confide in that he was bisexual. His first and only male lover. The fact that Stephen had died two years before in a car wreck didn't seem at all strange as Blair walked up to him and hugged him. Blair was surrounded by love. He was warm, happy, completely content.

But then it changed, as it always did. One by one, the people Blair loved began to vanish, slowly, like a rainbow fading. As always, Blair ran desperately from one figure to the next, begging, pleading..., for someone, anyone to stay and love him. But his words went unheeded, as his loved ones continued to vanish. Something new to the dream caught Blair's eye, and he turned from the vanishing figure of his mother, to see Maya standing there. His eyes brightened, and he started toward her with his arms out. She was back! She hadn't left him after all!

"I hate you, Blair. You took my father away from me," Maya snarled at him in her melodic South American accent. Blair froze at the look of intense hatred on the woman's face. "Don't you ever come near me again. I don't love you anymore, Blair... I'll never love you...," Maya, too, began to fade now.

Blair turned, his search becoming more and more frantic. Surely someone would stay! Someone must still love him! In despair, he watched Maya vanish, to be replaced by a new figure. He stared as Jim Ellison appeared before him, smiling, arms open. Blair hesitated a moment, then moved forward toward the welcoming form of his partner. "Jim?" he asked hollowly.

In the real world, Ellison froze as he was about to sit beside Blair on the bed. Blair had just called his name. Jim was about to answer, when he realized that the kid was still asleep. So he just stood and watched, waiting to see what would happen.

In the dream, Blair felt relief washing over him as he closed the distance between Jim and himself. Jim would stay, he knew it. Jim would never leave him. Jim would... (No!) Blair thought. Jim's face had changed, he was no longer smiling. Blair drew back as the detective began to speak to him.

"What do you want now, kid?" The vision of Jim growled softly. "You always want something, some stupid sensory test, always using me. You use everyone!"

Blair tried to shake his head, to tell Jim it wasn't true. But he couldn't speak. His eyes widened in horror as Jim, too, began to vanish. At last, Blair managed to cry out, "No Jim! Don't leave me!"

"You're always getting into situations you can't get out of," said the dissolving form. "Do you have any idea how much trouble you cause me? You're not a worthy partner, Sandburg.... You're not worthy of anything...!" Jim spat, as he disappeared completely.

Blair sank down in despair. Jim was gone; he'd left him. Everyone Blair loved was gone. He was alone. Completely alone.

Ellison sat quickly on the side of the bed as Blair cried out for him, begging the detective not to leave him. Gently, Jim pulled Blair into a sitting position and enfolded him in his arms. "I won't leave you, Blair. I won't.... I'm right here...," Jim began to rub Blair's back as the young man began to sob.

"I'm sorry!" Blair wept, still lost in his nightmare. "I don't mean to cause you trouble... I... I never meant to cause anybody trouble....," the words dissolved into hysterical tears.

"Shhhhh... it's OK," Jim whispered soothingly, stroking Blair's hair. "It's OK, Blair." Jim held Blair's head against his shoulder as the young man continued to sob. Slowly, hesitantly, Blair's arms crept up to wrap around Jim's middle. The sobs dwindled to simple tears as the young man came awake. Jim kept his arms around him, gently caressing the back of Blair's head, holding him tight. "I'm right here, Chief," he said softly against Blair's ear. "I'm not going anywhere."

Blair held tight to the strong, solid form of his partner. If he held on tight, maybe he could keep Jim from disappearing like the others. Maybe Jim would still care about him, if he just kept his arms around him....

They stayed like that for a long time, Jim holding Blair in his arms, whispering to him, reassuring him that he was there, and would stay there. Blair's crying had been reduced to an occasional, gasping sniffle as he pressed his face into Jim's shoulder, arms clenched tight around the detective's body. Eventually, the desperate grip loosened, and Jim let go as Blair pulled back. The young man kept his eyes turned down, studying his lap, unwilling to meet Jim's eyes. Jim kept one hand on Blair's arm, willing the young man to talk to him. Another few minutes, and he got his wish.

"Why do they always go away, Jim?" Blair asked. The voice was small, hesitant. The voice of a little boy who had had his heart broken too many times, a voice far too full of sorrow for someone so young. It broke Ellison's heart.

"Who, Chief?" He asked softly, squeezing Blair's arm. "Who went away?"

Blair snorted at that. "Who didn't?" he replied, cryptically.

Jim waited, but that was all Blair said. Jim studied the young man in front of him. His partner, his Guide, his friend. Slowly, Jim leaned forward.

"I didn't," he said quietly. "I won't, Blair, ever. Not if you don't want me to. I will never leave you," Tears were beginning to slowly slip down the smooth cheeks again, the full bottom lip had begun to tremble. Ellison was shocked as he realized just how much the anthropologist had come to mean to him in the few short months they'd known each other. Uncertainly, nervously, unsure of what Blair's response would be, Jim leaned closer and gently brushed his lips against Blair's wet cheek.

Blair's head came up sharply as Jim sat back, the red rimmed eyes widening. Jim became uncomfortable. "I'm sorry," he sputtered. "I shouldn't have...," The rest of the detective's apology was cut off by Blair's lips sealing over his own.

Blair pressed his lips to Jim's, closing his eyes, losing himself in the closeness of his friend and partner. When Jim had kissed him a moment ago, it was like the sun coming out after twenty-five years of rain. In that one tiny touch of Jim's lips to his face, Blair felt everything fall into place. Now he let his lips gently part at the probing of Jim's tongue, feeling the detective's arms come up to encircle his waist. It felt right. It felt completely right.

Jim pulled Blair's body tightly against his own, feeling the ridge of the young man's ribs as he gently slid his hand over Blair's side. He moved his hand up to fondle the long curls, realizing he'd been dying to do that since.... The rest of the thought was lost as Blair's hand slipped inside Jim's robe to glide over his chest. Jim reached the hand not nestled in his friend's hair down to tug free the belt of his robe, opening it to give Blair's fingers easier access to his skin. The anthropologist took the invitation, reaching both hands up now stroke his fingertips over Jim's torso, pausing now and then to tweak the older man's nipples.

Blair smiled against Jim's lips as he heard the big man moan. Blair repeated the last touch, gently pinching Jim's right nipple between his fingertips, and was rewarded with another moan. Blair let his hands continue to wander over Jim's body, feeling the hard muscles of the washboard stomach flex and twitch at his touch. He jumped a little in surprise as Jim suddenly pressed him back to lie on the bed. He broke the kiss to look up nervously at the big detective, who instantly froze.

"Blair, are you OK with this? Because we can stop right now, if you want," Jim said, never taking his eyes from Blair's. He was fully ready to love Blair, but only if the young man was also ready. He watched as Blair seemed to think about it, then smiled and relaxed, allowing Jim to lower him onto the bed. Jim smiled back at him, and lowered his head to kiss him again. How could you fall in love with someone so fast? Jim didn't think it was possible. Blair was an amazing individual, in more ways than one.

Blair relaxed as Jim's tongue explored his mouth again, feeling the big man's hands drift down to his waist. He felt Jim tug his shirttail out of his jeans, and closed his eyes at the sensation of the soft material brushing his skin as Jim pushed the shirt up. He stretched his arms back over his head, arching as Jim's fingertips slid across his stomach, making all the little hairs stand on end. Blair clenched his hands on the headboard of his bed as Jim followed his fingers with his lips, lightly kissing a path over Blair's flat belly as the rough fingers crawled up to trace teasing circles over his nipples. "Ohhh man," Blair breathed, feeling his arousal pressing with increasing urgency against his jeans.

Jim kissed the skin of Blair's stomach. His sensitive lips detected the slowly increasing warmth in the soft skin, feeling every one of the little dark hairs coming to attention, muscles spasming lightly at his touch. As Jim ran his fingertips over Blair's nipples, his lips registered an increasing in the rush of blood circulating through the skin, and felt the increased vibrations as Blair's heart began to pound. Jim moved higher along Blair's body to take a nipple between his teeth, very gently, lightly running his tongue over the little nub as his hands followed the path of dark hair down Blair's body, to where it disappeared into his jeans. Blair's moans were increasing in volume, and Jim heard him gasp sharply as the detective reached down to stroke him through the tight denim. Jim's own arousal was pushing against his boxers.

Blair clutched at the headboard as Jim teased his nipples, then inhaled sharply as he felt the big man's fingers lightly begin to caress his cock through his jeans. He closed his eyes again as he felt Jim carefully pop the button of his fly open, easing the zipper down. Jim's fingers trailed in a feather light path over Blair's thighs as the detective slowly pushed the jeans down his legs. Blair obediently raised his legs, and smiled as he felt the jeans fully stripped off, followed by Jim running his fingertips up the underside of Blair's left leg.

Jim tossed the jeans aside with one hand, stroking the other hand over the velvety-soft skin of the back of Blair's thigh. The young man's chest was heaving now, as he clung to the headboard. Jim continued to tease the back of Blair's knee with one hand, and ran the other hand down Blair's stomach to grasp the waistband of his boxers. Jim eased the plaid boxers down, and off, then gently took Blair's waist in his hands and turned the young man on his side, facing away from him. Jim quickly stripped off his robe and his own black boxers before laying down, spooning up behind Blair's back. He lay still for awhile, running his fingers up and down Blair's spine, before slipping one arm around the young man's waist and pulling him back against his chest.

"Are you all right?" Jim breathed into Blair's ear, gently curling and uncurling his fingers against Blair's midriff. He was answered by Blair's hand reaching back and down to stroke over his arousal. Jim's hips thrust forward at the light touch, surprising himself. "That's some touch you've got there, Chief," he said, in admiration. He heard Blair chuckle softly as the young man pulled his hand away. Jim slid his hand from Blair's midriff back over the young man's side, and then down his back to gently squeeze his bottom.

Blair was startled as Jim's free hand snuck over his hips to wrap around his erection. He bit back a cry as Jim began to run his hand up and down Blair's shaft. Blair came an instant later, gasping, feeling Jim cupping him, milking him dry. As his body shuddered, he felt Jim's hand, slick with Blair's essence, glide back over his side. Blair took a quick, hissing breath through his teeth as he felt Jim's finger slip into him. He closed his eyes in delicious rapture as Jim followed with a second, and then a third finger, gently coaxing Blair to open. Using his own seed to lubricate him.

Jim gently slipped his fingers into Blair, then over his own shaft, carefully lubricating himself with Blair's seed. Then he pushed himself up against Blair, waited a moment to let the young man catch his breath, then thrust his hips forward. Jim gasped as he slid up to the hilt into Blair's body, feeling the young man's muscles clenching around him like a glove. They fit together like a key in a lock. Gently, carefully, wary of hurting the smaller man, Jim began to gently pump against him, sliding himself in and out of the smooth, silken cavity of Blair's anus. He leaned forward to press his lips into Blair's shoulder blade as he felt himself approaching the brink.

Blair arched back against Jim as the big man pumped against him, feeling Jim filling him, making him whole. He closed his eyes as Jim's teeth grazed his shoulder blade, welcoming the sting that would mark him as belonging to Jim. They rocked together for a long minute before he felt Jim explode inside him, simultaneous with the sharp, short yelp of ecstasy from the deep voice behind him.

Jim shuddered, spending himself within Blair's body, relishing the feel of his Guide's skin under his lips as he kissed Blair's back. Jim relaxed, trembling in the last throes of his orgasm, tracing gentle circles over the smooth expanse of Blair's shoulders. As the tremors slowly ebbed, Jim wrapped his arms around Blair's waist, not ready to uncouple from him yet. He pulled Blair back tight against him, rubbing his cheek over Blair's shoulder, running his palms over Blair's chest and belly, ruffling the soft hair.

Blair sighed as Jim slid his hands over him in a caress that said love, possession, loyalty, protection. He had never felt so loved, so safe and cherished, as he did in that moment. It was nearly overwhelming, and Blair couldn't help prevent a little sob of relief from reaching Jim's ears. He felt the big man withdraw from him, and he allowed himself to be turned over and enfolded in the great arms. Jim held him close, stroking his back, tenderly kissing his temple and forehead. Blair snuggled against the broad, hairless chest. "I love you, Jim," He whispered softly against his partner's throat.

Jim felt his own eyes fill up at Blair's words. It had been so long since he'd felt this way about someone; to know that Blair felt the same way.... There were no words for it. Jim just held Blair to him, loving him. He's mine, Jim thought, to everyone and no-one. And I'm his. Anyone who tries to hurt him will answer to me..., Jim's thoughts trailed off as he fell asleep, clutching his new love to him.

Blair sighed as he felt Jim's breathing become deep and even. Will you stay, Jim? he thought, with a gentle smile. Everyone who's ever loved me had gone away, eventually. Blair wrapped his arms around Jim in a possessive embrace. If you have to leave me someday, I promise I'll try to understand.... But let anyone try to take you away from me... He softly kissed the smooth skin under Jim's chin, then closed his eyes and followed Jim's lead.

THE END