In many ways, this whole saga begins with my old grade school buddy, Bruce Coleman. He is a screenwriter and researcher for Nasser Entertainment. One of the people he often interacts with during his day is Brian Bloom who has some production deals with the Nassers. In our Real Life roles, Jared and I have been very curious about the logistics of how Oz is shot. Bruce had Brian Bloom call me about that.

Admittedly, it was difficult not to ask him what it was like pretending to get your neck snapped while trying to give a blow job. Somehow, I refrained and asked about the sets and how they affected the work on the show. He agreed that the four walled sets and practical lighting made set ups between takes almost non-existent and made it easier to remain in character. He also confirmed that in scenes involving large numbers of the cast, the actors are improvising their actions in the background according to their prison jobs and friendships. This whetted our appetite to learn more.

Thus, when we were planning a trip to scout a location in Jersey, we set up an appointment to visit an actor on Oz with whom we have a mutual friend. We also arranged a tour of the facility where Oz is shot as potential sound stages for the project that prompted the scouting trip.

MEANWHILE. . .

Crazy Jared and I crafted and sent the action figure to Christopher Meloni as a fan thing. That led to. . .

A conversation with one of our Privateer actors, Ray Proscia, (www. theprivateers. com) at the Xena convention. He mentioned being a long time friend of Christopher Meloni.  [Note, that Ray does a wonderful Meloni as the villain in the series finale of Walker, Texas Ranger] We had the doll with us to get it photographed, so we showed it to him. He became amused and put us in touch with. . .

This man, John Lineberger, also a Privateers person who had until this point only dealt with our partners. He is a grade school friend of Christopher Meloni's and is the one credited with getting him to move to New York and start acting. Ray figured that John would see the doll when it arrived and we could get a first hand account of the reaction. Did we ever. John told us how excited and touched his buddy was and how much he thanked us. When we mentioned that we would be in New York, Christopher expressed an interest in getting together to thank us in person. Not being stupid, we said yes. Of course, fates conspired for it to be the same day as the tour of Oz but back in New York on the set of Law & Order: SVU. Did I mention that my hair had exploded at 10 am?

That brought us here in late June. Oz is shot on an Army facility and has a little guardhouse with armed security to keep out wandering visitors. It looks pleasant enough but the heat and humidity was beastly. But we were there and excited to tour. The ABM is Russell Crowe's film "A Beautiful Mind." As we were lead about I wondered how to balance Producer Girl, Fan Girl and the Mistress. My first thoughts are often woefully inappropriate. I am so grateful that thought bubbles cannot be seen. I figured it would be safest if I behaved as I would want people to when they visited my set. That way, I might stand a chance at getting invited back. Still I had to wonder if I would have any decorum if we ran into Mr. Crowe. . .

This is me with the very kind and patient location manager for Oz. The actor we had come to see wrapped early. But since we were there on a tour of empty warehouses, the lovely lady from the development authority who rents the facility for the Army asked if he would show us what Oz did with their space. He agreed. We are headed for the infirmary. They moved here only this year and had to completely re-create the sets they had in New York.

This guy is setting out all the little meals with little drinks while the cast is having their real lunches. What we were impressed with is that the only lights used in these scenes are those florescent ones overhead.

There have been some changes to some of the sets since the season finale. That explosion gave the produces an excuse to make some long sought after modifications to some of the sets.

EmCity. The first surprise was that Hill's narration box is set right there in the middle of the room. He had been wrapped a while back to go film Matrix 2, so we wondered what was being done with it.

These are practical sets. There are no fly away walls, so when the actors are jammed in there, there is a cameraman with a hand held camera in there with them. Very cozy, and again, it cuts down on set-ups.

The cage is still there. Our guide told us it will get a lot of use this season. This is our Joker cam.

This will give an idea of the size of the place. Kim is standing at the control panels between floors. Of course, Fan Girl wanted to get inside the pods, but these were dressed sets for the afternoon shoot. Producer Girl wouldn't like someone messing with her sets, so she had to be content with photos.

Our guide is explaining about how the materials used to build these sets were different from the New York sets. We also found out that they do about 70 set-ups on average during a shorter day and shorter week than most shows. Most dramas do only 35 to 40 set ups per day. It made the performances on Oz even more impressive considering the lightning speed of the shoot.

Kim was having fun up here pretending to order lock downs while we were asking about how the place was air conditioned. Not fair.

It's easy to tell that they were late in their season. The signage was falling off. Note Jared's head in the background.

Again, this is all the lighting used in the shower scenes. I'm still very proud for managing not to ask how many naked men have been filmed in there this season.

The infirmary was difficult to rebuild because it utilized the existing exterior walls and windows at the old facility. Thus, the windows had to be replicated and lit accordingly.

Ryan O'Reily's favorite place to visit.

These walls and columns are plywood sprayed with concrete. As solid as they appear, they are hollow. It was startling to tap them. The columns mimic the real ones that were at the old facility.

Solitary. These doors are hollow as well. Very strange to knock on them. At this point, Kim who had fallen behind in the tour came up babbling about Christopher Meloni in a wife beater and khaki pants. Before I could yell "what" someone called action and we were stuck here in silence until they called cut.

The hole. Our guide tells us that the hole next to this one had padded walls for hurling naked bodied against walls and floors. That room was locked when we went by. We were stuck here as well during a scene being shot. While I know the stuff on the walls is an effect, it sure looks nasty up close. I'd never lick those walls. Just after we left here we heard the director wrap Christopher Meloni for the season. It was hard to know what to do at that point. See him then in all his Keller-ness or wait. Since our guide had been so kind, we let him get back to his job and left.

Well, we just couldn't resist a picture of Vern's mail cart.

Once outside, the first thing we see is Scott Winters running nearby with his hair blowing in the hot breeze chasing a ball. That ended all my decorum. I had Jared get 'lost' on the way out and ride by the actor trailers. I shot J. K.  Simmons as we flew past. He gave me such a grin after snapping the photo. He was playing with Winters and Acevedo. I only got the silly camera to work once.

John Lineberger met us at the Law & Order sound stages. Christopher was late, but we busied ourselves looking at the personnel bulletin boards and the suggestion box. We heard about the history of John and Christopher's friendship. Over all, we were very entertained though the day was beginning to wear on us. I am, however, still grinning like a lunatic. It made my face hurt the next day.

We did not even notice this sign until the fourth time we'd been in and out of this door. Since this was the extras holding area and the wardrobe department, no one thought it odd that we were lurking about.

Poor John was so worried that we would be disappointed. He is a fabulous Southern gentleman. But we figured as long as we held onto the buddy, we'd get to see the man. Not that we were holding him hostage -- technically. When Christopher called, we found that there had been a miscommunication. He arranged to meet us with his wife at a nearby restaurant since his call had been pushed back to after 8pm. I had no idea he was resting at home or I might have nixed the plan. Meeting him between jobs was okay, but I felt bad about pulling him away from family time. The Melonis had insisted, so off we went. Fortunately, we had time for a drink before they arrived. That made me forget about the hair.

He arrived in some strange orange shorts, combat high tops and a baseball cap. And he wore glasses like mine. For a while, we talked about the doll. I told him we were at Law and Order putting suggestions in the suggestion box. He laughed when I said I suggested a pissing in the bucket scene. When he found out we had been at Oz, he asked why we didn't find him (hindsight, geesh. )We talked about all the set ups and the speed of filming and even though he was obviously tired, he talked about acting on Oz (he credits his co-stars more than the directing) and didn't think the sets were as much a help to him as the working rhythm he had with his cast.

I asked him what was happening to Keller this season. He responded with that Keller smirk as if he wouldn't tell me anything. The wine had kicked in by then and the Mistress was simmering under the surface. I told him I'd have none of that look. He gave me a yes ma'am and we talked about the season. Much to my complete horror, I found out the scenes being shot while we were in solitary and the hole were with Lee Tergesen.  He was amused that I wanted to see that. He asked me why women were so interested in Keller (there was a table of them next to us going nuts. )I told him that we found the intensity of the way Keller falls in love very romantic and he's just plain hot.

That's when he started messing with Kim and me. I asked for a photo with him and John. He asked if they should kiss and should there be tongue. John was having none of that, but there was a headlock with a smooch to the hair. Christopher's wife is sending me that one -- she was faster with the camera. Poor Kim had to pass him his dinner plate and he asked in that very husky voice if she wanted a taste. I almost choked on my food. Oh, the thought bubble in my head at that moment!

Jared was giving as good as we were getting. When Christopher came back from the rest room, he was walking like Keller. Jared said he should leave and come back like Stabler because his call was soon. Christopher said he wasn't ready to clench right then. He admitted that he was walking like Stabler that morning on Oz and they had to re-shoot.. He was very fried at dinner but still wonderfully entertaining. He hugged us when we left. Yes, it was wonderful. We were certain that he'd never remember meeting us. That man needs a vacation. But his wife would. She was a hoot and ever so generous and kind. We found out yesterday that he remembered and had a very good time. We're invited to join them when we're back in New York. It's a good thing that I hadn't asked to lick his tattoo. The war of thought bubbles in my head was rough, but I made it.