You Better You Bet

I felt the cool fingers skim across the back of my neck an instant before I heard the voice in my ear. "I just read," the throaty voice purred, "that in Russia the average length of a sexual encounter is 11.7 minutes, compared to 28.1 minutes in the United States."

I waited for the momentary wave of panic to pass and sipped my beer. No cop in the world would use those words to arrest somebody, but it was a hell of an interesting pickup line... "Yeah, so?"

"So..." The barest touch of lips against my ear. "I want to find out if it's true."

All of a sudden the evening was looking up. I'd just been sitting there at the bar, drinking and wondering what the hell I was going to do with my life, when out the blue she, whoever she was, appeared. And for someone I couldn't see, this was quite an appearance. Jesus, even through the leather of my jacket I could feel her breast pressing against my back. A plan started to form; simple but effective. Play with her a little more, then maybe a quick fuck in the bathroom... hell, I probably wouldn't even last the 11.7 minutes. "What makes you think I can help you with that?" It was getting damn hard not to turn around, but I forced myself to concentrate on the beer in front of me.

I caught movement out of the corner of my eye, and watched as a hand with perfectly manicured red nails snaked around my waist. "You're Russian, aren't you?" she whispered. Then her tongue started delicately exploring my ear, at the same instant the scarlet-tipped hand dropped lower and stroked me once.

Too much, too fast. With a small cry I jerked back, overturning the bar stool in my haste to get up. I'd come across aggressive women before, but never one who wanted to do it right on the bar. Not that I would've minded, but I've never even done it on the bar before. Not till after hours, at least... Needing to know who I was dealing with (how many people in DC knew my heritage, anyway?), I turned around... and came face to face with none other than Dana Scully.

At least, I thought it was Dana Scully. It was her, but... not her. No business suit this time; she wore a tight black shirt, a very short leather skirt, and high-heeled ankle boots. She wore more makeup than I'd ever seen on her and her copper hair, normally perfectly coifed, was fluffed out, giving her a wild look. Wild, like the feral gleam in her brilliant blue eyes.

Oh, shit. Scully, vamped up and totally trashed. Vamped up, totally trashed, and throwing herself at me. My cock twitched in acknowledgment, but the rest of me was paralyzed, and I could only stare at her for a moment. I had no way of knowing if she normally spent her Friday nights cruising bars and picking up men she had orders to arrest, but it felt wrong. Very, very wrong. Had to be a trap. Mulder had to be around here somewhere, sober and with tons of backup, just waiting for Scully's signal to slap the cuffs on...

"You are Russian, aren't you?" she asked again, leaning in closer.

"Well, yeah, but..." I breathed in the sweetly intoxicating scent of her perfume as I righted the stool and sat on it. Damn, I wanted her. Oh, shit...

Nope, nope, couldn't think about wanting her. Not till I found out what she was up to. "Scully, what the hell are you doing?"

"Don't call me that!" Suddenly vixen became petulant child. "He calls me that. Never uses my name. Sometimes I wonder if he remembers I have a name."

That cleared things up a little. Mulder had pissed her off somehow, so she set out to do something to get back at him. Why couldn't she just throw out his porn magazines or something? "Okay, *Dana*, what the hell are you doing?"

"I told you, I want to know if what the magazine said is true." She leaned in even closer, her hand dropping into my lap again. "You are Russian, aren't you?"

Jesus, she didn't even have to move the hand... I stared at it and found my eyes drawn to her nails. Red. Fire-engine red. Fire engines... sirens... What was that about the mythological siren? She enticed men to their doom. Uh-oh... "My parents were. I'm American."

Scully laughed softly and stroked me. "I bet that Russian blood shows itself. I bet you wouldn't last even the eleven minutes."

Not if she kept doing that, I wouldn't. Hell, I'd come right there if she didn't stop. I grabbed her hand and sucked on one finger. "Bet I last longer than the 28 minutes," I said, and immediately regretted it. Twenty-eight minutes? I'd be lucky to last five with her.

Scully laughed again and leaned in closer, tapping a scarlet fingernail against my chest, sending a little electric spark through me with each tap. No, that nail polish wasn't fire-engine red. That color had to be called Fuck Me Red. "Tell you what," she purred. "Let's make a real bet out of it. If you don't last 11 minutes, I arrest you. If you last between 11 and 28 minutes, I'll give you a 12-hour headstart before we start hunting you again. And if you last longer than 28 minutes..." She drew my face down to hers and kissed me hungrily. "...then you go free and nobody'll ever know I saw you."

I had to pull back and breathe deeply or else I would've passed out. My mind whirled with the possibilities. Fuck Scully and still go free? Fuck Scully and maybe go to jail? (And if I went to jail, I'd be dead soon after, one way or the other.) Or... not fuck Scully at all? This couldn't be happening. It had to be a trap. Or she was so drunk she didn't know what she was saying. But if she was drunk, she was an amazingly lucid drunk -- she still made sense (in a perverse way) and she hadn't slurred a single word. No, it was a trap. Had to be. But that kiss... "You're... serious?" I asked. "You want... you really want to have sex with me?"

"No..." Now she traced my bottom lip with her fingernail. "I want you to fuck me. Fast and hard, and let's see how long it lasts."

That one word coming from her lips was almost enough to make me come. Oh shit oh shit oh shit... "You mean... no plan? No Mulder?"

"I'm not into threesomes," she said, running her finger lightly down to my chest and toying with a nipple through my shirt. "Or audiences."

"Coulda fooled me," I muttered. Shit, could everybody hear that jackhammer pounding in my chest?

"What?"

"Nothing." I scooped up her hand before it could move lower. "Could I add to what I get if I win?"

"Depends on what you want, Alexei. You don't mind if I call you Alexei, do you?"

Her. I wanted her, more than I'd ever wanted any other woman in my life. "Uh..." It took a moment before I remembered what I was going to say. "Cancel any outstanding warrants against me?"

"I can arrange that. So... do we have a deal?"

Oh, shit. I was really going to get a chance to fuck Dana Scully. Oh shit oh shit oh shit... "Um... could I get that in writing?"

"Of course. Never let it be said that Dana Katherine Scully isn't a woman of her word. Deal?"

Sweet Jesus, what did I ever do to have this fall into my lap? The other shoe had to drop sometime. Things like this just did not happen to Alex Krycek. The woman of my fantasies would never, ever just throw herself at me... Still, how could I turn down an invitation like that? My benefactor was dead (or wanted everybody to think so) and my position with the Consortium was tenuous at best. If I had a chance to get the Fibbie nuisance off my back, why not take it? If nothing else, she was offering me the realization of a very long-standing fantasy, and a ceremonial "fuck you" to Mulder to boot. If I said no, I should go immediately to get my head examined. "Yeah, sure. Deal. Where?"

"My place. You know where it is, right? Of course you do; you broke in there once." She kissed me again, driving her tongue into my mouth, stealing away my very breath. Only when I thought I'd pass out from her closeness and lack of oxygen did she draw away. "Don't keep me waiting, Sexy Alexei," she whispered. And then she was gone.

Every instinct told me to run; to get the hell out of there, as far as possible away from there, as fast as I could. Every instinct, that was, but one.

Hell, even if it was a trap, maybe I could still die a happy man.

Half an hour later, signed pledge tucked safely away in my jacket, I was sucking on Scully's breast. Sucking on the nipple of the very naked, and very horny, Dana Scully. On her bed. I'd almost think I'd died and gone to heaven if I wasn't already sure I was destined for another place.

After handing me the document, she'd done a very sexy striptease, then stripped my clothes off me, ready to pounce. If I let her do that, I could kiss this whole bet goodbye. She was going to make damn sure I didn't make it to 11 minutes, so I had to take control; beat her to the punch. Stretching the encounter out only meant more pleasure for her. It meant life to me.

So as soon as she got my clothes off, I pushed her back on the bed and ravaged her with hand and mouth. Her sighs and moans should have told me my makeshift plan was going well, but they only aroused me more. The sounds made me want to thrust inside her and fuck her fast and hard, just like she wanted, death or no death...

I had to put that out of my mind. The most important requirement for an assassin is self-control, and now I needed to tap into my own deep reserve of it. I couldn't think about it. Couldn't allow myself to remember that it was the woman of my fantasies on the bed under me. My brain shut down every other time I'd ever had sex; why wouldn't it now?

I kissed my way down her body and she spread her legs for me, but I stopped as a thought struck. "Dana?"

"Mmm?"

"Is foreplay part of the bet?"

"Mmm... no, don't think so..."

I sat up. "This isn't going anywhere till you find out."

Now she raised her head and focused on me. "No, I remember now. It said 11.7 minutes, foreplay not included. Is that a problem?"

Nope, no problem. In fact, depending on what she did, that might work in my favor. Not that either of us needed it, anyway. She was very wet -- when I stroked between her legs, my fingers came away soaked -- and very, very ready. Still, it couldn't hurt to indulge my fantasy a little, especially if she decided to return the favor. How many times had I dreamed about doing this? I started licking her, exploring each fold of flesh with my tongue, savoring her sweet taste as she sighed and moaned and begged for more. I swirled my tongue over her clitoris, took it into my mouth and gently sucked on it, and was rewarded a few minutes later with a soft cry as she came. Oh, yeah. I was in control now.

Or so I thought. Next thing I knew, I was on my back with Scully straddling me, sucking my nipple. I could feel control slipping away again as I surrendered to her ministrations and moaned. Most women paid only cursory attention to my nipples, not understanding or maybe not caring how crazy it made me if they played with them. But somehow Scully knew and she paid them lavish attention, to the point where I almost thought I could come just from that. Then her attention moved lower.

I lay there waiting, eyes closed, breathing hard, but felt nothing more than her warm breath on my cock. I was starting to wonder just what the hell she was going to do when I heard her throaty laugh. "You're a big boy, aren't you?" she cooed, then delicately touched the tip with her tongue.

I almost rocketed off the bed. It wasn't the action itself that prompted that; just the thought that it was the FBI's famous Ice Queen doing *that*... But this was no Ice Queen. No, this woman, the woman running her tongue firmly along the vein on the underside of my cock and driving me absolutely nuts, was pure fire. I heard myself moan as her tongue swirled over the head and then she took me in her mouth, all warm moistness, and I was going to come if she kept doing that, kept licking, sucking and God, using her teeth and shit, she was good and I was about ten seconds away from orgasm and... coming was a good thing. If I came now, I'd last longer the second time. All I had to do was just let her finish, just let her bring me to orgasm, just shut the hell up...

"Dana?" I gasped.

"Mmm?"

The vibration alone was almost enough to send me over the edge. Dammit, why'd I have to go and say anything? She wasn't going to stop. She'd finish it; why didn't I just let her fucking *finish* it? "Dana, stop," I heard myself say.

She stopped sucking and licking, but didn't remove her mouth from me as she raised an inquisitive eyebrow.

"If I come now, it'll take me longer the second time and I'll win the bet," I finished weakly. Idiot. Asshole. Might as well just shoot myself right here and get it over with.

She let my erection slip from her lips and met my eyes for a long moment. "So why'd you stop me?" she panted.

"I don't know," I answered truthfully. "I guess I like living on the edge."

Scully leaned down and kissed me greedily, rummaging in the drawer of the bedside table with one hand at the same time. I thought she was fishing for a condom, but when she sat up and straddled my thighs again, I saw that she had a stopwatch in her hand. At first I thought she'd forgotten, but if she had the presence of mind to dig out the stopwatch for the bet, she certainly had the capacity to find a condom, too, or ask if I had one. Which meant it was a conscious choice on her part not to use one. That should've worried me -- if she'd pick me up, no telling who the hell else she'd picked up -- but at the moment I didn't care. From the look in her eyes, she didn't either.

"So," she said, "let's get this show on the road."

Not yet, not yet, too soon after the blow job... I had to slow her down a little. And about the only way to do that was... "Wait," I panted. "Condom?" The question felt weird. When was the last time I'd been the responsible one?

She shook her head slowly, never taking her eyes off mine. "No condom. I want to feel *you* inside me, not latex."

Oh. My. God. Just the thought... No, stop thinking. Or if I had to think, couldn't I at least think for a while about *not* coming? Unsexy thoughts... had to think unsexy thoughts...

Scully gave a wicked little laugh. "Twenty-eight minutes? No way. Not even ten." Then she clicked the stopwatch on, tossed it on the bed, and gently guided me inside her.

We both gasped at the initial penetration, and it took all the self-control I had not to come right then. When I could breathe again I opened my eyes and watched her face as she slowly impaled herself on my shaft. She was so ready she came when I was only halfway in, the spasms and the look of utter ecstasy on her face almost sending me over the edge, too. Even through that she continued easing herself down, and once she had taken me completely in, she started moving. She set a fast pace, designed to bring me off as fast as possible, and it almost worked. Lost in sensations I'd only dreamed about, I finally stopped thinking, let her take the lead and just enjoyed. She was hot, tight, wet, very wet and it felt good, so very very good, better than I'd ever dreamed and I didn't care how fast I was going to come, didn't care about losing the bet; she could shoot me right where I lay if she wanted and I'd die a happy man and --

Her soft growl when she came again brought me back to my senses. Wonderful as this was, if I didn't want it to be the last time I ever had sex, I had to take control. First priority: set the pace myself.

In a fluid motion, I rolled our bodies over so that I was now on top, still buried deep inside her, and I held myself there, long enough for her to gather her wits and look at me. "Hey, what gives?"

"I warned you about the blow job when I didn't have to," I panted, covering her throat and chest with small kisses."The least you could do is let me set the rhythm. Fair's fair, y'know."

Scully thrust her hips a little, but she had to do better than that to get me to move. "Since when do you care what's fair?"

"It's a recent concern. Hey, you're only in this because you want to get off, but my life's on the line here."

She thrust again, but I still wouldn't move, and she squirmed uncomfortably. "Your life? Just your male ego." She contracted her inner muscles, squeezing my cock, and I couldn't suppress a shudder. She was going to get what she wanted no matter what, wasn't she?

"Do you have any idea what'll happen to me in jail? I'll be dead before the cell door closes. At least give me a chance to save my own life."

She took a deep breath and let it out in a long sigh. "Okay, okay, do what you gotta do, but just please *move!*"

I kissed her deeply and drew slowly out of her, almost all the way, then, just as slowly, back in. I continued in the same rhythm, buying myself some time and frustrating the hell out of Scully. She squirmed and writhed beneath me, wordlessly begging me for more, but I kept up the maddening rhythm. It might take a while for her next orgasm to build, but it would be an explosive one, and she ought to thank me for that.

She apparently didn't think so. She nipped at my neck, clawed at my back with her nails, moaning in frustration. "Faster... harder... more..." she begged.

I laughed softly. "All in due time, Dana. So tell me again... why me?"

She raked her nails down the length of my back and my ass, sending a shiver up my spine. "You're the only Russian I know," she gasped.

Okay, this was more like it. I'd finally gotten myself under control, and she was losing it. Perfect. "And who are you going to do for the American half of this thing? Mulder?"

Scully surprised me by laughing heartily at that. "Mulder? You think I'd have sex with *Mulder?*" she asked. "Mulder's self-centered, takes me for granted, and he's boring!"

I couldn't help but laugh. "So of course you went looking for double-crossing killers."

"Mm-hmm." She pulled me closer and kissed me. "I always had a thing for bad boys, and you're a very bad boy. You're dangerous. Exciting." She arched up to meet my slow thrust. "Harder, Alexei, harder! I said I wanted you to fuck me, didn't I?"

"Oh, I'll fuck you, all right. When it's time." I tried to estimate how long it had been since I'd first entered her, but I found I couldn't. I had no idea how long she'd been in control of the encounter, and though the slow, lazy thrusts allowed me to hold back, I couldn't hold back forever and I was getting close the point where I had to let myself come or I'd explode. Not yet, but not too far from it. Where was that damn stopwatch anyway?

Her voice broke through my thoughts. "Know what would be really wild?" she asked, her hands running up my back and over my shoulders. "If we took that fake arm off. I never did it with a one-armed assassin before."

The arm. Now there was an unsexy thought. A twinge of pain flared through my left shoulder at the mere mention of the prosthetic. Normally I'd welcome just about any opportunity to take the damn thing off, but not now. As much as I needed other subjects to focus on, this one was too far in the opposite direction.

Had to push it out of mind. "Does that mean you've done it with two-armed assassins?"

"No, I think this is a first for me on both counts."She dug her nails into my back again and gasped at an especially deep thrust. Shit, she was going to start taking chunks of flesh out if she kept that up. "Never met an assassin as sexy as my Alexei, one-armed or not..."

Her Alexei? No doubt about it now -- no way in hell was this Dana Scully. Dana Scully thought I was a slug. She'd never call me sexy, never have sex with me, never be possessive.What the hell was she doing? What was *I* doing?

Scully's fingers brushed over the straps holding the prosthetic on. "C'mon, let's take this off..."

"No!" The word came out sharper than I'd intended. "It screws up my balance if I take it off."

"'S okay, I can adjust..."

It hit me what she was getting at. "No adjustment necessary," I told her, giving a slightly harder thrust that elicited a moan from my partner. "You can be on top next time, okay?"

"Mm-hmm. Can we take the arm off next time too?"

"Whatever you want." The strokes were mostly mechanical now; my thoughts were elsewhere. Now that I'd finally gotten my mind off the sex, I couldn't get it back on. "You really don't have a problem doing this with the guy who killed --"

Her tongue in my mouth shut me up. "Not here," she whispered. "That's for outside the bedroom."

And I thought I was the expert at separating business and pleasure. If she could put all that aside she had me beat, hands down. Either that or... no, couldn't go there. Truly frightening thought...

The feel of those red nails lightly stroking my ass drove the thought away, and I almost lost it right there. It would be soon anyway; stopwatch or no stopwatch, I was past the point of no return. Control was gone, totally gone; instinct took over. My thrusts were faster now, harder, deeper, finally giving her what she wanted. "Ohh, yes, that's good," she moaned, moving with me now. "Yes, yes, so good, Alexei, you feel soooo good..." And her fingers started roaming again.

They skimmed further down, and for a second I thought one of them was going to go... but it didn't. And I thought that was a good thing... until her fingers skimmed lower and started lightly stroking my balls.

Oh, God, how could she possibly know exactly what buttons to push? "God, stop, don't do that, feels too good..."

But she wasn't listening. Her body convulsed around me and she cried out loudly, cried my name as she came. My name. Jesus...

Somehow I managed to hang onto that last shred of control as the spasms of her orgasm diminished, until she was looking at me with an evil gleam in those incredible eyes of hers. "Nothing," she panted, "can ever feel too good." One finger stroked the spot right behind my balls, then she pressed down, continuously and hard.

That did it. There it was, one of the strongest orgasms I'd ever had, and I gave up the bet with her name on my lips... except that it wasn't an orgasm. Didn't take long to realize I was still rock-hard, still moving inside her, still in desperate need of real release. Seemed fitting somehow -- an orgasm that wasn't an orgasm triggered by Scully-but-not-Scully. "Oh my God...what the hell...?"

Scully laughed. She actually laughed at me. "What's the matter, Alexei, feels too good?"

I would've answered her (with an emphatic yes), but it happened again, and again right on the heels of that, leaving me moaning and gasping so much I was sure I'd pass out. Then she removed her finger.

That was it, finally, the orgasm of a lifetime, totally mind-blowing, so long and hard I thought I'd split apart, but this time I felt myself spurting inside her, even as I collapsed on top of her and my world grayed out.

It was probably only a minute or so later when I returned to full consciousness to find Scully... petting me, like I was a lap cat or something. Or maybe she was the cat. She certainly looked fulfilled and contented.

I raised my head and met her eyes. "What the fuck was that?"

She laughed and gave my neck and shoulder another stroke. "Oh, just another something I read in a magazine," she said lightly. "Been dying to see if it really works." Another throaty chuckle. "Guess it does, huh?"

I could only stare at her for a minute. "Lady, you gotta stop reading magazines. You're dangerous with that stuff."

Then I noticed her left hand curled around the stopwatch. Well, nothing I could do about it anymore. The deed was done; my fate was literally in her hand. "So... what's the verdict?"

She held me in suspense for another minute before turning it so I could see it. "Thirty-one minutes and eighteen seconds," she announced. "I'm truly impressed."

I let out the breath I didn't even know I was holding as relief washed over me. "Oh my God. I did it. I actually did it."

She laughed and stroked my back again. "Yes, and you did it so well, too. I really am impressed. I was so sure I'd be slapping the cuffs on you, oh... about twenty minutes ago."

I rolled off her onto my back, utterly spent, and took a few deep breaths. "To be honest, so was I. You will honor the bet, right?"

"Of course," she said, leaning over to paw through the drawer of the table again. "Besides, it would be a terrible shame for talent like yours to be locked away from the female world."

Speaking of talent... "Um... Dana?"

Scully stopped in mid-rummage. "Yes?" She looked over her shoulder at me with a little leer. "Sexy Alexei?"

Jesus Christ, it wasn't possible to be aroused again already, was it? "Can a winner ask another indulgence?"

One eyebrow arched. "You want something else?"

No, not something else. Just... more. "Mm-hmm. Finish the blow job."

She broke into one of those all too rare radiant smiles. "With pleasure."

Did I say I always lasted longer the second time? Not with her at the controls. With absolutely no self-control left I was completely in her oh so deft hands (mouth?), and I even surprised myself with how fast I came.

Afterwards, she dug through the drawer some more and finally found what she was looking for. I could only stare at her as she lit up the cigarette and took a deep drag off it.

At least it wasn't a Morley. That would've been too much.

She snuggled closer to my right side, and finally noticed me staring at her. "What?"

What did she *think?* "Okay, where's the pod you sprang from, and what did you do with Dana Scully?"

She laughed so hard she choked on her lungful of smoke. "Oh, Alexei..." she gasped.

The name was cute in the beginning, but it was starting to grate on my nerves. Like I really needed any more reminders of Russia. "Please, it's Alex."

"Okay, okay, Alex." She took another puff. "It's very simple, y'know. Up until now, you've only known Scully. Tonight you met Dana."

I motioned to her, and she handed over the cigarette. Though I used to smoke (it's a Russian thing, y'know, and I would've bet my last dollar that somewhere Scully had a magazine giving the exact percentage of Russians who smoked), I hadn't in years. But there's just something so right about having a cigarette after great sex, and the deep drag I took was terrifically satisfying. Seemed just a bit surreal too. Scully had lit up immediately after the blow job, and I could swear there was a faint taste of... well, myself, where her lips had touched the filter. Totally weird sensation. I took another puff and passed the cigarette back. "I think I like Dana a lot better than I like Scully."

"And I like Alexei... Alex..." she corrected herself with a look from me, "a lot better than Krycek."

"Same person, Dana."

She turned a bit and started to run her free hand slowly over my chest. "No, I don't think so. I don't think Krycek would've made this bet."

Interesting... "Why not?"

"Because he's a coward."

Not a coward, just a pragmatist. "Also human. There probably isn't a guy on the planet who could've turned you down after that approach."

"Oh, I could think of a couple." She traced little circles around my nipple with her nail, and damn if there wasn't a stirring down south... "You're very, very good at this sex thing," she purred. "I'm going to have to make another bet with you very soon."

Shit, I couldn't remember being able to get it up that fast even when I was a horny teenager. What was that about the siren and doom? If I wasn't careful, this Dana person would fuck me to death. Maybe a little distance wasn't a bad thing. "That sounds like my cue to leave..."

She threw a leg possessively over mine. "What makes you think you're going anywhere?"

Okay, so maybe being fucked to death wasn't a bad way to go... "What makes you think we need a bet to do this again?"

Scully stubbed out her cigarette, then returned to her circle tracing. "Gives the sex an edge," she said, then delicately swirled her tongue over the nipple she'd been playing with. "Makes it really hot."

Oh, yeah. Couldn't argue with that. "Okay, if it's a bet you want, a bet you'll get."

"Yes?" She blew softly on the nipple she'd just licked and the sensation shot right to my groin. Oh, God, not again. I didn't think I could take it again so soon. But I couldn' tpush her away, either. "What bet?" she prompted.

I could feel Krycek the pragmatist going into hibernation, letting Alex the idiot run the show. Alex the sex-crazed idiot. Damn her for pointing out that little dichotomy. "I bet..."Shit, her hand wasn't really going where I thought it was going, was it? Where'd she manage to get the road map to all my personal hot spots, anyway? "Um... I bet... Oh, God, that feels good..."

"Oh, I know it feels good. Now, what bet?"

What the hell. In for a penny, in for a pound, right? Might as well follow her lead. "I bet nobody finds out about this... us... for at least..." Think, think... how long could I stand nightly assaults like this? "...six months." If she wanted it bad enough, she could keep it to herself that long. God knows I wasn't about to tell anybody.

"I bet nobody ever finds out about it," she countered.

Ever? As in... ever? This wasn't just my lucky day, it had to be the luckiest day anybody ever had. "Ever?" I asked.

"Mm-hmm, ever. Now... what do you suppose should happen to the loser?"

"Does this bet *have* a loser?"

"Well, if somebody... say, Mulder... finds out --"

"No legal problems," I reminded her. "Those warrants are going away, aren't they?"

"Absolutely."

"And I can... oh, God, do that again... I can handle... yes, ohhh yeah, right there... handle Mulder..."

"I bet you can." She stopped stroking me and met my eyes. "So I guess this is your basic win-win situation. Now...whaddya say we get this bet started?" And she straddled me again and kissed me.

The full magazine factoid: "What's the average length of a single sexual encounter? In a global survey by Durex, Russians scored low, clocking out after 11.7 minutes in the sack (foreplay not included). Other countries I've decided not to relocate to include France, where things are wrapped up in 16.1 minutes' time, and Thailand, home of the ultimate quickie -- 10.4 minutes. But I'm pleased to report that we Americans spend the most time -- 28.1 minutes -- doing the horizontal hula. We also have the highest rate of philandering (50% of respondents admitted to having worked some extracurricular angles), but I'm still not giving up my citizenship." Gigi Guerra, Jane Magazine, November 1998

For the record, the other thing Scully refers to reading in a magazine comes from an article in the October 1998 issue of Cosmo: "The Lay of His Land: Map Out His Erogenous Zones." (It was No. 5.) Although I haven't yet had hands-on experience with this particular move, I've been assured it does work as written. Lucky, lucky Alex <g>