"Good stuff, babe. Same for you, gorgeous?"
"Yep, Alex. Pretty damned good."
"I couldn't tell."
"You mean the screaming didn't give me away?"
"Oh," he said, rolling his shoulders and eyeing his lover amusedly, "was that
for me?"
"Who else?"
"Thought maybe you were fantasizing about that hunk in the movie..."
"Who, Wolverine?"
"No, the green guy with the twenty-foot-long tongue. Of course I meant
Wolverine!"
"Just 'cause he's got pecs you could use to crack walnuts?"
"Nice eyes, too..."
"Alex? Since when are you an eye man?"
"Hell if I know, o grey-green-hazel wonder..." Mulder nudged Alex in the
armpit with his elbow, making him jump. "Quit it, ya doofus!" Alex exclaimed,
shaking off the startle. "You know I'm ticklish there!"
Mulder rolled to his side to prop himself up on an elbow. "But now that you
mention it, a twenty-foot tongue could be entertaining, too..."
"Yeah," sighed Alex. "Not bad being able to give yourself a rim job..." This
comment earned him another poke in the ribs.
"Thinking of Wolverine..."
"A- ha ! You were thinking of him!"
" You brought him up."
"What about him?"
"It would be nice to have an all-metal skeleton..."
"In your line of work, it would certainly save on medical bills!"
"Not that it couldn't have been useful to you , too," he added, gesturing
towards Alex's truncated left arm.
His face grew sullen as he shifted on the mattress. "Thanks for reminding me."
Mulder's expression immediately shifted to concern for his beloved. "I'm sorry!
I didn't mean that to be cruel..."
"That's okay," shrugged Alex. "I know you were just kidding. Besides," he
continued, his eyes twinkling with mischief, "having blades like that between
your fingers could be entertaining..."
"...Or really, really frightening. I could have done without the mental image
of long, sharp blades while my balls are visible, okay?"
Glancing down, Alex joked, "That's what you think. I suspect that they're
hiding in your intestines for safety at the moment."
Mulder looked down at himself to examine the equipment perfunctorily. "Great,
you guys. Leave Mr. Johnson all alone to fend for himself, willya?"
Alex joined him in a hearty laugh. "How'd you like the big hairy dude?"
"That Sabretooth thing with the nasty contacts? Naaah... Too big. Too hairy.
The young punk with the laser vision was okay, though..."
"Too young for me, Mulder."
"That's right: Ian McKellen's more your style. You like 'em craggy and
British, don'tcha?"
Green eyes narrowed mock-threateningly. "I thought I told you to leave our
previous relationships out of this room."
Mulder's hands went up in a gesture of surrender. "Sorry. That was a cheap
shot."
"Although I did notice you giving that Patrick Stewart the once-over... Remind
you of a lost love, does he?" His grin lit the whole dim room.
"Fuck you, Alex."
"Too late. You did that already!" he joked.
"I'll have you know he does share a common feature with someone I love..."
"Oh, yeah?"
"Yeah. He's got green eyes, too, ya prick!" He pressed his forehead against
Krycek's and fixed him with a teasing gaze.
"Oh," he replied, admitting his ignorance, but accepting a warm kiss from his
lover. They moved apart slightly and rolled onto their backs, staring up at
their reflections on the mirror-tiled ceiling, which Mulder never had gotten
around to removing, though the waterbed had long been replaced by a regular
mattress and box spring.
"If you were an X-Man, who would you be, Alex?"
"You're an X-Man already, Mulder—an X- files man!"
"No, I mean it. What mutation would you like to have?"
"That Mystique chick could change into anybody ... I wouldn't mind being her!"
"Oh, great. The man I love wants to be a blue woman."
"That's not what I meant! C'mon, wouldn't it be cool to be able to transform
into anyone at any time?"
"I guess it'd be handy for a spy."
"Precisely! It'd be the ultimate disguise!"
"You know, I don't think that's really the mutation for you, Alex."
"Why not?"
"She was just a poor imitation of the people she transformed into. I think I'd
like it if you were a little more invulnerable..."
He turned his head to give Mulder another grin. "Maybe with a mysterious past
that even I don't understand completely?"
"There ya go. Just keep your blades above the belt, okay, Logan?"
"Awwww, you're no fun!" he exclaimed, winking at the man beside him. "How about
you? What secret superpower are you hiding in there?"
"I'd say I'd be Charles Xavier, but that's just a little too close to home, if
you know what I mean!"
"Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men?" Alex droned, like the old
radio announcer.
"Well, I used to, but I got better!" answered Mulder, snickering.
He thought for awhile, then visibly brightened. "I've got it!"
"Is it contagious?"
Swatting at the shoulder next to him, he stared up and formulated his solution.
"You're Rogue!"
"I'm Rogue?"
"Yeah—you're just an innocent on the playing field of experts, absorbing the
essences of everyone around you, trying to figure it all out."
"Oh, great. I'm a sponge."
"Okay, maybe the analogy falls apart a little there. You've got to admit that
you get very personally involved with the people you try to help. Maybe you just
lighten their burden a little."
"You may have something there, Alex."
"And you'd probably look hot with that little blaze of white in your hair, too!"
They laughed over this mental image, then slowly grew silent. "It would be hard
to have to be that removed from other people, though. I mean, she couldn't even
touch a normal human being without almost killing him..."
"Y'know, Mulder, they all had it rough. The X-Men are mutants, shunned by a
society that was afraid they were all dangerous."
"You've thought about this, haven't you?"
"I used to read the comic when I was growing up, and I couldn't help but
identify with their isolation, their feeling of being different and
persecuted..."
"Really?"
He turned at last and looked his love right in the eye. "Yeah, especially when
I was about eighteen and realized I was gay."
"Oh." Now it was Mulder's turn to feel ignorant. "Kinda heavy for a comic
book, huh?"
Alex smiled reassuringly. "Maybe, but it helped me feel just a little less
alone, you know? Sort of like you do."
Mulder's smile reached his hairline. "You too, baby. I love you. Wanna get
some sleep?"
"Sounds like a plan." They kissed sweetly, whereupon Alex settled on his side.
Mulder reached up and turned off the nightstand lamp, and curled against the
warm back that Alex presented to him. "Can we go see the movie again next
weekend?"
Chuckling in the dark, Alex replied, "I thought you'd never ask. I love you,
you nut."
"Good night, Logan."
"Good night, Marie."
Two Thumbs Up
by Janet F. Caires-Lesgold
An extremely naked Fox Mulder came striding in from the bathroom and flopped
down on his bed next to an equally naked Alex Krycek, who lay sprawled flat on
top of the crumpled sheets with his right wrist under his neck and clutching his
stump in his fingers next to his head.
