Author's Webpage: http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Gallery/7898/Kendalina/archive.html
Disclaimer: They're not mine they belong to LucasFilm.
Notes: Okay for any of you die hard SW fans out there I admit I messed
with a few details. But they're minor ones I promise... you might not even
notice them unless you're as obsessed as me.
Pairing: Lu/Wedge
Rating: R
Series: #4 in the Comforts Series
Wedge practically bolted out of the hanger as soon as he'd turned his fighter over to the techs and after he'd spoken to the tour group who had just happened to be passing through their section of the hanger bay when his wing had arrived back. He'd been as proper as he'd known how until he'd noticed that Luke wasn't with them. He knew from Luke's itinerary that he'd be scheduled to be on this tour. But Luke hadn't been with the group. Where was his friend?
"Luke?" Wedge called as he entered their quarters. Then he relaxed as he saw the other pilot lying on the bed.
"You're back early." Luke said in a near whisper as he sat up, unable to take his eyes of the figure in the doorway.
"It turned out the Intel was wrong. There was only one flight guarding the place." Wedge said as he stepped the rest of the way in to the room and closed the door. "We just flew in practically unchallenged."
"Sounds easier then dealing with the things here." Luke sighed tiredly.
"You okay Luke?" The younger man asked. "You don't look so good." That was an understatement, the pilot thought as he looked at his friend. Luke had dark circles under his eyes and his posture was slumped.
"I had trouble sleeping." Luke shrugged, then dropped his eyes to the floor. "I missed you." He mumbled so softly that Wedge almost didn't hear it, but he smiled at the warm feelings that comment elicited in his chest.
The silence after his words seemed to get heavy, like something more should come. But neither knew what. Finally Wedge yawned hugely.
"You must be tired too." Luke managed. "It's not exactly easy to sleep in the cockpit."
"Yeah... I'm wiped out. I think we could both use a nap huh?"
"Yeah." He smiled slightly, then rose, his hands coming up to work the fastenings of the other mans flight suit. He knew how hard it could be to manage them when your hands were numb from hours of handling constantly vibrating controls of a snub fighter.
"Feels right now." Luke mumbled sleepily.
"Huh?"
"That's' why I couldn't sleep." Luke explained. "The bunk felt all wrong with you gone."
"I didn't like flying without you. Felt wrong not having you at my wing. I don't trust anyone as much as you..." He meant to say when they were flying, but some how the last part of the sentence just wouldn't come. It didn't matter, he did trust Luke more then anyone else. "I missed you too, not as my wing man, but you." He added then shyly pressed a kiss against Luke's forehead. Sure he'd done it plenty of times when the other man was asleep but when he was awake that was different. What if he was misinterpreting what Luke felt?
But Luke just blinked then smiled and cuddled closer to him, draping one arm across his middle. With a sigh of relief Wedge brought his arm up around his friend and let himself drift off, feeling completely content.
It only seemed a second later that he was woken by Luke struggling against him, the silence of their room broken by his soft distress sounds.
"Luke." He called and gently shook his friend. "Come on Luke wake up." The older man bolted up right gasping his eyes wide.
"Wedge?" He questioned, his voice verging on a whimper.
"Shhh... Right here." Wedge murmured pulling Luke against him again. The other man instantly burrowed into him. Wedge wrapped his arms around his friend's shaking body, making comforting sounds, trying to sooth the shudders. "Hush, what's wrong."
"Dreams." Came the reply muffled against the skin of his shoulder. "Nightmares."
"Shhh..." Wedge murmured, patting Luke's back, remembering the first night he'd held his friend just like this. "Dreams can't hurt you, you know that."
"Yeah." Luke snuffled.
"What are they about?"
"Lots of things... the crew men of the D-d-death star, m-mostly. Do you know how... how m-many people crewed that thing? Over a million. R2 found it while he was rummaging through its central computer."
"Luke, you know it had to be done."
"I know but that's not the only dream... there are one's w-where..." Luke trailed off suddenly.
"Where what Luke?" Wedge encouraged him gently.
"Where you died." Luke's arms tightened around his friend enough to cause Wedge to briefly worry about his ribs, but he put the worry aside, tightening his own arms.
"I didn't die." He whispered, his mouth near Luke's ear.
"I know... but..."
"I'm right here." Wedge said as he tipped his friend's face up and forced him to look at him. "You see?" Luke nodded.
Wedge lay back and held his arms out to the other man, who crawled in to them as though they were the only shelters he knew.
They lay together in silence for several minutes. Then Wedge spoke. "Talk to me Luke. You can't just keep bottling all this up. It wouldn't do for the Alliances greatest hero to lose it.
Luke was quiet for a long moment. He pressed his face against Wedge's neck so that the other man wouldn't be able to see his face in the dim lighting. "I think that's just it." He began shakily. "I never wanted to be a hero. I shouldn't be a hero."
"And why not. You did the galaxy a huge service. You destroyed something with the power to kill billions in a moment."
"I know... and I was right and justified to do that. But what do I tell the ghosts of the men on that thing when dream about them? "
"Tell me about them Luke."
"Sometimes I'm somewhere, I don't know where, it's just cloudy and I can't see anything. Then it clears and they're all there. Standing in ranks... I just know it's them. The storm troopers aren't wearing their helmets; I can see their faces. I can hear what they're thinking. Every one of them is asking why did you kill me?"
Wedge felt the dampness against his neck, signaling his friend's tears.
"Everyone thinks I should be so proud, so happy about what I did. I can't stand it."
"Oh Luke." Wedge sighed gently, easing the man a little away from him and propping himself up on one elbow so that he could look down at him. "It had be done you know that." Luke nodded slowly. Wedge smiled slightly at the sight of his friend. Luke looked no where near his age right now. With his soft blue eyes bright with tears, and wet trails down his cheeks he looked all of seven or eight.
"Hush now Luke." He soothed. Then he slowly lowered his head, allowing the other man plenty of time to turn away, overjoyed when he didn't. Gently he covered Luke's lips with his own.
As they parted, Wedge rolled Luke under him. He cradled his friend's head with one hand and gently tracing his friend's face with the fingers of the other hand brushing the tears away. "Just let it all go for a little while… just be with me."
Luke nodded slowly, bring his arms up around the younger man, overlapping them at the small of his back. "Make me forget."
"Yesss." Wedge hissed, lowering his head to capture those soft lips.
The kiss started gently, a careful exploration that slowly deepened into more. Luke moaned as Wedge's tongue slid in to his mouth cautiously, ready to withdraw at the slightest hint of distress. But none came; it was the opposite reaction in fact. Luke's arms tightened around him and he thrust upwards bringing their hard cocks together.
Wedge gasped harshly at the contact. "Luke."
Luke drew back opening his eyes. He retreated just far enough to be able to fall in to Wedge's stunning green eyes. For a very long moment they gazed at one another, and would have continued to do so if it hadn't been for the instinctual thrust one of their bodies gave bringing their erections together again. The first thrust was quickly followed by another and another as they established a swift rhythm.
It took only few minutes for them to reach their completion. Clutching and crying out one another's names as them came.
They collapsed together utterly exhausted. Luke having had next to no sleep in two days and Wedge having spent those two day on a mission. They barely had the energy to shift in to comfortable positions tangled together before they fell into an exhausted slumber.