Author's Notes: Saw Tok'ra II again the other day, and really saw the end. This tag is the result.
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The gate's closed. He's gone. He's really gone. God, could it be forever? Will I ever see him again? Get a grip, Sam. If he'd stayed here, you'd be burying him in a week, maybe less. But ... No 'buts', Sam. What's done is done.
It seems an eternity since Washington. Since he told me he had cancer. Since he handed me my 'dream' job with NASA, and I had to turn him down. Since I broke his heart. And it was broken, there's no doubt about that. Oh, he played the perfect soldier. Untouched by trivial things such as a daughter's betrayal. But even as he left the room, I knew his heart was breaking, and that I was the cause. It was all I could do to get myself together before joining the others.
Then, a few weeks ago, he turned up in Colorado Springs, lock, stock, barrel, and chemo. I saw him when time permitted. He's too military to have allowed me to make time for him. Or at least that's what I believed. Actually, I think that's what he believed too.
Even with this last mission, I couldn't find the right words for him. The words that would tell him how much I cared for him. How much I would miss him when he was ... gone. I knew, somehow, that he was much, much worse. Not that he would ever have told me. Oh, no. He's much too strong a commander to admit that kind of weakness. But I knew. Just like I knew we'd find the Tok'ra.
The Tok'ra. Against Ra. How ironic. Twenty-four hours ago my Dad didn't even know who Ra was. The real Ra, not the benevolent one from Egyptian mythology. For all his years in the military, for all the battles he'd been in, for all the enemies he faced, he was blissfully ignorant of the most dangerous foe the human race has ever faced. He knew nothing about the Stargate, the Goa'uld. Not to mention System Lords, hosts, zat guns, transport rings. Not even in his wildest imagination would he have conjured up thoughts even close to them.
But now it's all changed. My Dad's host to a Tok'ra now. Joined until death with Selmac. What did Martouf call it ... a true symbiotic relationship? Terrific. And now my father knows more about the Stargate, the Goa'uld, the System Lords, than I can ever hope to know. And because of me, because I suggested this...this relationship, he's facing more danger, more hardship than he ever has. And I can only pray he'll be all right.
Martouf promised he'd look after him, though, and my memories of Jolinar tell me that Martouf does not lie. But Garshaw... God only knows what that one plans for Dad. Selmac. Whoever. Whatever?
The colonel's watching me, waiting for some sort of sign that I'm okay. Or not. Wonder how long...
"Major, are you okay with ... this?" His hand points to the gate.
I can't help myself, he's set himself up beautifully. "Okay with what, sir?"
"Oh for crying out loud, Carter. With your father going off with ... them."
"With the Tok'ra, sir?"
"Yes. Them."
"They're the good guys, sir." I hear myself reply, and know I'm right.
"Ya think?"
"No, actually I know." And to my surprise, I do know. Dad's in good hands, fighting for a good cause... the salvation of the universe. Doesn't get any better than that. "But I do have one problem, sir."
"What's that, Captain?"
"What do I tell my brother?"