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Chapter 40: Major Louis Ferretti
I think the colonel's about to crash...
It's hard enough holding everything together after a mission like we just went through. Your brain keeps telling you it's over but your body's still on this major high that keeps all your senses on full alert. On top of it all this time we have the added tension of not knowing what's going on with Daniel...
The colonel's been pacing the floor non-stop ever since the medics tied his arm up. Maybe it's adrenaline still working on him...or maybe just the fact of not wanting to stand still and think about what might happen...
No. That's not how the colonel operates. He doesn't deal with problems by avoiding them. He looks them in the eye and meets them with a conviction I've often envied...at least now he does. Before Abydos it would have been an empty darkness in his eyes, making them glow like embers from hell's own pit...the look that made you want to pull the ragged edges of your soul around what was left of your heart and pray he wasn't aiming that look at you...
I remember the look a lot of people mistakenly referred to as the 'O'Neill cold-ass bastard glare'. Kowalski and I talked about it once, pretty much agreeing there was nothing cold at all about Jack O'Neill...
That look was fire...promising retribution in ways only seen in imagination...or nightmare...
There's still a lot of fire in the colonel's eyes, but now it's more like a fire tempered by feelings he wouldn't let in before. Feelings that didn't exactly die with his son, but definitely got lost for awhile...
*Whoa, Ferretti, that's pretty deep even for you...*
It's true though.
The colonel O'Neill from four years ago and the one pacing the floor of this room projecting every ounce of spare energy he's got through those doors and into Daniel's room are as far apart as Earth and Abydos...in every way. This Colonel O'Neill is one hell of a guy...and a damn fine friend.
I think the man lying in that room had a hell of a lot to do with that change, more than any of us...even the colonel...ever realized. Daniel doesn't even seem to notice the way people take to him, try to be 'more' around him...he'd laugh at me for even thinking something like that.
Maybe it's just because he's become such a breath of reality among us. Not to say we've forgotten how to be 'human' in that broad metaphysical sense, but without a doubt a lot of us...especially those who've seen combat...tend to misplace that particular trait...and tend to treasure it whenever we do see it.
I just wish...
No. Daniel doesn't need wishes tonight. Instead I try to remember the prayer Mama taught me as soon as I was big enough to realize there was more to the world than just Mama and Daddy and the farm that was my world up until then.
I just hope the Good Shepherd is inclined to let us keep our particular treasure around for awhile...