DISCLAIMER: Star Wars and all publicly recognisable characters, names and references, etc are the sole property of George Lucas, Lucasfilm Ltd, Lucasarts Inc, 20th Century Fox, Timothy Zahn, Barbara Hambly, YKW and the other writers of the expanded Star Wars Universe. This fan fiction was created solely for entertainment and no money was made from it. Also, no copyright or trademark infringement was intended. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author. Any other characters, the storyline and the actual story are the property of the author.
"Destroyed?" The word was like a lump in his throat.
"The ship itself was blown up by some Duran booby trap," Ghent clarified. "The wreckage was never recovered. It sort of floated out of the Rim territory and was never seen again."
"How did you find this out?"
"Funny you should ask me that," Ghent said, his normally serious face now amused. "I was slicing into some really old records and I just sorta...bumped into an old friend. Frade, or something like that. When I first joined up with Karrde, he was already here, and we were sort of friends. He was hacking into the same thing and we kind of tripped over each other. He left just after Mara joined up, so he knew I had worked with her, and asked me who had sent me to find this stuff out about her. I didn't take too well to that, mind you, so I demanded to know who had sent him. And this is the funny part."
"What?" Luke said with mild impatience. He brushed it off.
"Frade now works for this guy named Cal Saphringer. Mara used to sort of be an item with him."
"I know. Mara ran into him while she was looking around Duran."
"Duran is isolated. If Cal is out there, you can be sure his activities aren't legal."
"Some things are more important, Ghent," Luke said softly.
"Well, Luke, I don't know how much Mara told you, but...well, Cal was kind of attached to her, from what I understood. I met the guy a little while after she hooked up with us. He was looking for her, but she wouldn't see him. In fact, she denied even knowing him. Cal told me about her being the Emperor's Hand, but I kept my mouth shut, thinking it was a big lie to try and strongarm her into seeing him. Later on, when I found out, it was too late to say anything."
Luke paled a little bit. "I thought Mara had to keep her idenity as the Emperor's Hand a secret for the sake of protecting her own life. Why would she tell Cal?"
"I don't know. But if he knows that, then who knows what else he knows?"
*Like Mara wanting to kill me.*
Luke had a sudden feeling of dread. "Slice me a channel to her," he said. "I want her to come home now."
When Mara woke up--very late--the next morning, her danger sense was tingling. She looked around her, but there was nothing. She scrambled to the cockpit of the Jaded Sky and found all the readings were normal. She even stepped out of the ship and scanned the cargo hold, but it all looked calm.
There had to be something wrong.
She scrambled back up into the cockpit and sealed the hatch. She had to stay in here. It was safe in here. She was all fueled up and ready to go, all she had to do was take off.
Of course, that would be slightly rude to her host, she thought with a wry smile. She really didn't want to do that. Was it necessary? Sure, Cal was a little on the...unstable side. She slapped open a comlink to Cal's quarters. In a few moments, Cal appeared.
"I was wondering when you were going to get up," he said, caught slightly off guard. He was half-dressed, with his shirt hanging open and his dark hair wet and tossled from a shower. Apparently he also still liked to sleep late. Mara resisted the urge to take a second look.
"Did you make any progress on your contact last night?" she asked.
He gave a cockeyed smile. "I only called him last night. He hasn't gotten back to me yet. What's the hurry?"
Mara squirmed. "What do you think the hurry is, Cal? I've got a little girl to get back to, not to mention a husband. I've been wandering around the galaxy for over two weeks and I want to go home. Let me know the second you find something." And she cut off the communication.
With a sigh, she settled back into the pilot's seat. Her anxiety was riding up on her again, and she had to calm it down. She took a deep breath and slipped into a mild trance, working her mind into a calming pattern.
As she sat, the minutes ticked by. She was aware of how secure she was on the ship. Nothing could reach her, she was safe. She moved deeper into the trance, calling on her most calming memories. As she regressed farther and farther back into her mind, she became aware of a memory.
She had lain at death's door, in the realm between this life and the next. Callista had been there with her, passing on, bidding her goodbye. Although they had never been friends, Mara treasured that memory. It felt good to know Callista had found peace in spite of all the things that had gone wrong with her life, her very existence. She had lost her son and his father, but she was past all that.
Mara watched her go into a great Light that seemed to have a sentience beyond anything Mara had ever known. It was so beautiful, she felt the urge to follow. She had reached for it, just wanting to experience a brief moment, and had felt a Presence beyond any aspect of the Force she had ever known existed. It was beyond beautiful.
Although it was not the luminous brightness she had experienced all that time ago, Mara felt the edges of it now, just touching her mind. Like a scattered sunbeam, it shone into her soul with its flittering Light, faint but there beyond a doubt. And she heard words, as if the Light were not just Light but Sound as well. And the Sound said, "Trust Me."
Her eyes snapped open. The comlink was flashing. It was Luke. *So soon?* she wondered, but received it away.
"Mara, you have to come home now," Luke was saying. "I don't want you anywhere near this Cal Saphringer any more. Has he told you anything about the Jabba's Fist ship that made a trip to Duran?"
"He said he'd placed a call to his friend, and that his friend was going to get back to him sometime today," Mara said, her voice sounding distant to her own ears.
"Mara...that ship was destroyed. They think the Durans destroyed it, part of their hostility toward offworlders." His voice was pale as he spoke the words, but Mara felt sudden anger at him anyway.
"Luke...how can you just be so willing to give up!" she snapped, forgetting her earlier resolution to give up herself if this lead didn't pan out. "Don't you even care? This boy is your son!"
Luke just stared at her for a long minute. Mara could practically hear the wheels in his head turning. It wasn't that she had been so cruel with her words--although they had been cruel nonetheless--but that her tone had been so angry. Distance did not mellow the vibrations through the Force. It was like she'd taken a set of steel claws and raked them over his heart, bringing up all the debris that clouded his mind. Luke felt his own regret at Mara doing all this and not himself, his internal anger over his failures in what he was trying to do, and his guilt over the belief that he just wasn't trying hard enough because it was Callista's son, and not Mara's. As if that made the child mean any less to him.
Something had gone very wrong with Luke Skywalker. He'd gone from being a control freak to being a wimpy neruotic.
"No, Luke, that isn't true," she started softly, feeling her healing calm from before return to her and sending it out to him. "I didn't mean it that way. I know you tried. You did what you could. I did what I could. I'm the one who gets information. You're the one who searches the Force. And even though we're quite capable of doing each other's jobs, we agreed that this is what we were best at. I know that you care, Luke. I care too. And not just because I promised Callista. This child is your son, and I want to find him."
Luke shook his head. "You won't find him out here. The ship he was on was supposedly destroyed. It was never heard from again."
"But it could still be out there! Isn't it worth it to keep looking?"
"Yes, we'll keep looking..but not from out there." There was jealousy in his voice as he spoke his next words. "And we won't be using Cal Saphringer's help. I want you to head home now."
Mara frowned. Maybe this was the reason her danger sense was going off--Luke's bad feelings mixed with her own. "Aside from the obvious...any particular reason?"
"I just don't like what I've heard. Ghent told me a little about him. He knows all about you, doesn't he, Mara?"
"He did. He doesn't any more," she said pointedly.
Luke shrugged. "Nevertheless," he began calmly, "it's no good. He may not be...stable."
"I already suspect that."
"All the more reason. Come home now. We'll talk more when you're here."
"All right. I'll leave right now. I've been staying in Cal's docking bay, but I'm still prepped for takeoff."
"Good. I'll see you in a week...keep your mind open to me so I can make sure you're okay."
"Sure thing, Master Worryrat," she added with a good- natured smile. "I love you."
"And I love you, Jedi Troublemaker." The connection closed, and Mara started the pre-takeoff proceedures before calling on Cal again. He was dressed this time, his hair drying nicely.
"Mara, I'm starting to get the feeling that you want to see me," he said with a charming smile.
"Only to say goodbye," she said flatly. "I got some news from my husband, and he discovered that the ship I'm looking for was supposedly destroyed by the Durans. We could spend the rest of our lives searching for it."
"I thought it was important to you," he said, his cool exterior flailing a bit.
"It is, but going home to my family is more important." She gave him a smile that surprised even her with is compassion. "I'm not the girl you knew, Cal," she said gently. "I'm going home."
His eyes darkened. "Fine. Go on home." Then, just as quickly, they brightened again. "You know, you could at least let us give you an escourt."
"An escourt?" she said absently, checking some readings. "No, it's way too far for a small ship to follow me home---"
"We've been out here so long, Mara," Cal said with a wave of his hand, "that we could use a trip back to the core worlds."
"I'm not going to the core words. I'm headed for Yavin IV. That's where..." She stopped herself.
"Oh, that's home?" he raised his eyebrows in surprise. "I didn't think you were a jungle girl."
"I told you I'd changed." Okay, she really wanted to end this conversation and was starting to not care if it was done gracefully or not. "I'm heading out, Cal. If you hear anything, send it to Karrde. His operation is hard to miss."
"Oh, Mara, you're being rude again." He grinned at her. "As much as I enjoy it, I can't accept it. We're going to head back with you." He rested his head on his chin. "Didn't I hear that Skywalker had a Jedi Academy on Yavin IV?"
"Yes," she said tightly.
"I'd love to visit it. You know I've never finished my Jedi training."
"I'm sure there are good reasons."
"Now you're being smart. Are you so sure you've changed, Mara? Come on, what have you got to be afraid of?"
She let out a low, quiet sigh as she let the thought run through her mind. "I'm going on ahead of you," she said. "If you follow me, I guess I can't stop you."