Author's Notes: A reaction to some of the Obi/Ami pairings I've read. For those of you who know of my Sabé series in progress, you will find that this one-shot has nothing to do with that storyline. Sabé here is close to the same person, but in very different circumstances than in "Sabé's Journal", "Choice" or "Connection". She's younger, and the incident on Tatooine that led to the relationship depicted in those stories never took place here. I use Sabé for this because I've already decided so much about how I see her. I wanted to explore how Ani would have handled a relationship between his love and his Master and I thought I could do it without making him go ballistic.
DISCLAIMER: Star Wars and all publicly recognisable characters, names and references, etc are the sole property of George Lucas, Lucasfilm Ltd, Lucasarts Inc and 20th Century Fox. This fan fiction was created solely for entertainment purposes and no money was made from it. Also, no copyright or trademark infringement was intended. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author. Any other characters, the storyline and the actual story are the property of the author. Not to be archived without permission of the author(s).
Anakin looked at the two of them from his hiding place among the tall plants in the huge Theed Palace garden. He shielded himself well in the multilayered tiers of the grounds. His master had no idea he was there, a couple dozen meters above them. As he watched Amidala and Obi-Wan nuzzle and kiss one another, his broken heart wavered between rage and despair. It was too difficult to choose which impulse to follow, so he was still only observing them.
They started to walk down the inner garden path, holding hands and leaning against one another. Ani jumped to the outer path that circled the perimeter of this section and followed, his gaze never leaving the pair of lovers. His senses were so keenly trained on them that he ran right into a handmaiden with a thud. Instantly, they both looked from their higher vantage point to see if Obi-Wan and Amidala had heard the sound of the collision all the way to the lower garden. The couple were so involved in each other they would not have noticed a herd of Kaadu right under them, so the onlookers were still undiscovered.
"Anakin, what are you doing here?" the handmaiden whispered as she recovered from the impact. She pushed back the hood of her dark blue velvet cloak. Ani was relived to see it was Sabe. She had always been his best friend among the handmaidens. She was the first to congratulate him on his contributions to the war after the battle against the Trade Federation. She had even said her only regret at not actually being the Queen was that she did not have the power to help him with his mother. That she remembered his feelings on that issue impressed him, and ever since then, she was the only one other than Amidala he had kept in touch with.
"Sabe-Oh, Sabe, look at them," he said, all his misery expressed in that statement.
She gave a brief glance toward the couple and Anakin saw something in her eyes he had never seen in her before. Usually cool and detached, she had a misty look now. "I know, Ani," she said. "I think it's a good idea to get out of here. Let's go back to the Palace and talk."
The friends were silent as they returned to the Palace. Sabe led the way toward the quarters that were reserved for the Handmaidens, a place where she knew Anakin could have the privacy he would require to work out his feelings. As they walked the halls, they passed The Royal Bedchambers. Ani stopped for a moment before the Queen's doors. He ran his fingers over the elaborate carving of the Queen's crest in the white wood. He found it hard to breathe suddenly, and began gasping. Gathering all the conflicting emotions he felt, he threw the doors open and rushed in. Hearing the sound, Sabe looked back and saw what he did. She ran in behind him, closing and locking the doors.
Anakin walked around Amidala's bed, staring at it with burning intensity. It was as if he could see the event of last night playing itself out. He dropped to his knees and beat the mattress with both fists, tears streaming from his eyes.
"It should have been me," he cried. "I loved her from the moment I saw her, before he even knew who she was! They write me off as a child with a crush, but I know how I feel."
Sabe watched him for a moment, recalling the similar emotions that she herself experienced that morning when she had brought the Queen and Obi-Wan their breakfast. She performed her duty, stoically setting the tray on the stand for them as they snuggled together in the large bed, barely noticing her. She bowed, left the room and found a place in the garden where she had a good cry. She had not been over it long when Ani had bumped into her.
She approached Ani, knelt and placed her hands on his shoulders. "Listen to me. There is hope for the future. If you can put this aside, I'm sure that you and Amidala will be together. "
Anakin tried to calm himself so he could hear Sabe's words. "You think so?" He was willing to grasp at any thread that could offer him reassurance.
"I do," she said seriously. "I know Amidala better than she knows herself. I've lived with her here and studied every aspect of her personality so I can perform my job as her decoy without a flaw. There is a fire between her and your master now, but it's an infatuation that will burn itself out. Later, she will see your heart is true and she will turn to you. It's just that this is the worst time for your age difference. She has the needs of a woman, and you're still in the body of a boy. They won't see that your love is more mature than your appearance because it helps them justify what they've done. Ride the pain out, then forgive them. It is a Jedi's way."
Anakin turned and hugged her tight, "You're the only one who would understand, and not dismiss me."
"You are a friend, I would never do that to you," Sabe confirmed as she held him. She felt a slight tingle as Ani sent his feeling of gratitude through the Force so she would know what this meant to him.
Anakin drew back suddenly. "You love him! You love Obi-Wan! You have for a long time, haven't you?"
Sabe looked away. "It's not appropriate for the Queen's handmaiden to express personal feelings on whomever she has chosen as her...companion."
Ani would not be put off. "But you do. You've never told him. There could something between the two of you. Why haven't you done anything about it?"
Sabe sighed. "Anakin, there's a great deal of difference here. The Queen already knows you, you have done much to help our world from the time the two of you met. She cares for you deeply, despite the fact that she's with your Master right now. You are to become a Jedi, that will make you even more important and prominent in the future." She hesitated, then went on, resignation in her voice. "On the other hand, to an already influential Jedi who's been in favor with the Queen, I will never be seen as anything more than one of her appendages. I must accept that, and live with it as best I can."
"You don't have to," Ani started. "I can tell him..."
Sabe cut him off with an upraised hand. "No, Ani. I beg you, as your friend, please don't do that. It's better that he remain unaware of my existence, than to know he sees me as pathetic. Promise me you won't say anything to him!"
Ani dried his face with his sleeve and nodded. "I promise."
"Thank you," Sabe said, with relief. "Now, how about a trip to the gym? Let's go beat up on some practice dummies, shall we?"
As the years went by, the two continued their friendship. They would spend time together, so much so, that rumors started of their supposed romantic involvement. They agreed that they would meet questions on such matters with a smile that neither confirmed or denied the allegations. It drove the Palace staff crazy, and amused the other handmaidens to no end.
Eventually, things went as Sabe predicted. Amidala and Obi-Wan's passion for each other cooled, eventually dying out. As Anakin's body caught up with his spirit, the Queen began to notice him in a new light. Ani started to spend less time with his friend and more time rediscovering his love, but he made sure that Sabe knew she was still his most important confidante. The problems they discussed changed, but he still brought many of his concerns to her first.
For her part, Sabe was happy for Ani. She had her relationships, even almost married once, but realized there was something missing in each of the men she knew. She speculated that her expectations were too high, but didn't really have the heart to change what she was looking for. She buried her feelings for Obi-Wan, and carried on with her life.
On Amidala and Anakin's wedding day, no one outside of the bridal couple was more joyful than Sabe. It did her heart good to see two such close friends together and happy at last.
The reception was in progress and the first dance of the couple as man and wife was ending. Sabe had enjoyed watching their display of love, but now the dance floor was opening up to everyone and she wanted to be out of the way. She moved to the rear of the crowd and found someplace where she could be inconspicuous.
She closed her eyes and swayed slightly to the beat of the music. Suddenly, in her mind popped the vision of Obi-Wan as he looked at the ceremony. Standing in place as the Best Man, he had been very handsome in a formal version of Jedi Robes. She savored the memory, then recalled from Ani his advice on shielding if she really did not want Obi-Wan to know how she felt about him. Putting it into practice, she concentrated on the melody that was filling the air, the scent of the food and candles in the ballroom and the feel of the rich satin gown against her skin.
She was brought out of her meditation by the soft familiar voice of the Knight she dreamed of.
"Handmaiden Uzza, may I have the honor of this dance?"
Her eyes opened wide in amazement. For the first time, Obi-Wan was looking at her, smiling and extending his hand. She took it, and let him lead her to the floor.
"Anakin told me a lot about you a few days ago," Obi-Wan said.
"Oh?" was all Sabe could get out at first. She felt her heart race as the handsome Jedi took her in his arms and held her close to begin the dance. "All good, I hope," she managed to add. She berated herself, just knowing that she sounded stupid.
"Very good indeed. It seems you've been a great source of comfort for him, calming him during times that I hadn't even noticed there was a problem," Obi-Wan said with a rueful tone. Then his voice brightened. "That's quite a feat for anyone. I thought it would be in my best interest to become acquainted with a woman who shows that kind of talent. Perhaps you can teach me how to do that."
As they danced, they passed the Queen and Ani on the floor. When he faced Sabe, Ani looked over Amidala's shoulder and gave her a wink.
Sabe smiled. The night was going to be far more interesting than she had anticipated.