DISCLAIMER: Star Wars and all publicly recognisable characters, names and references, etc are the sole property of George Lucas, Lucasfilm Ltd, Lucasarts Inc and 20th Century Fox. This fan fiction was created solely for entertainment and no money was made from it. Also, no copyright or trademark infringement was intended. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author. Any other characters, the storyline and the actual story are the property of the author.
“I must be allowed to see her!”
The Gods save me from Jedi Masters, you think as you meet the eye of the ambassador to Corellia. The man’s eyes are glowing green with agitation brought on by the shout. Mace Windu is a well-spoken man, a powerful Jedi Master, but sometimes over extends his presence when he feels it is useful. Now appears to be one of those times. You can hear the heavy door of the hallway close and heavy well-placed footfalls echoing in the confined space.
Qui-Gon left two weeks ago to go on a final mission with his padawan, Xanatos. The boy apparently is to be knighted when the mission is over, and your love has asked you to venture to Coruscant to see the knighting at his side. You are simply awaiting the word. The arrival of Mace Windu was not expected to be that word.
Could there be something else wrong?
Could something have happened to Qui-Gon…?
The world is like a hazy curtain over a sun filled window. The chair that you sit on is hard against your legs and you grow so cold that its solid surface feels warm. You would feel it wouldn’t you? If he were hurt or…. You would feel the pain. The agony…the endless emptiness…the darkness as the brightest part of your life left. You would know it…there would be no other acceptable outcome. Qui-Gon has been a part of you for so long…
Mace rounds the corner in front of you. His brown cloak mingles with the flowing white curtain next to him. It wraps around his legs as if the wind bade it to twine with the man…to join him. He stops as he catches your eyes. His expressive brown eyes flame from within. You actually miss the sound of his approaching footsteps- the clack of his boots on the marble floor was like a beating heart. Constancy and warmth – protection, those footfalls made you feel safe. It also meant that the cause of his arrival was far away…and now…it faces you.
The Corellian ambassador immediately recognizes the newest member of the Jedi Council and struggles to his feet to face Mace. The Jedi Master nods quickly, but returns his eyes to yours. You know…there is trouble. You rise, gaining your height with legs not steady and a heart racing too fast to be contained in your chest. The folds of your dress tease your legs as they flutter to the ground and your consciousness hones in on its existence. Your hearing tunnels; your eyes train on him and time stops.
Qui-Gon wouldn’t leave you…
He wouldn’t…not without you….he would never leave you behind.
Mace moves toward you, but it feels like he is coming across a great distance…your eyes watch him, but it is so far away.
Qui-Gon couldn’t leave…not without knowing about Obi-Wan. Not without knowing your deepest secret that you have kept from him, at the cost of your complete peace. His son. Your son. By the Gods… Deep breaths- nothing is known yet. Calmness, serenity, peace…befitting the lifetime lover of a Jedi Master, grasp it. Feel it. Live it. Breathe… in out. Gods, Jinn….
“Tira! Tira, sit down.”
Your eyes turn to Mace Windu, now standing close. His presence envelops you, flowing through his being and reaching through yours. His hand is warm and large on your elbow- it encases the joint in tenderness. One of his legs extends to support your legs, making your knees bend. With a controlled descent, you collapse into the chair, gratefully allowing it to take your weight.
Mace’s eyes are the color of burnt amber from Yerinda, that deep yellow brown that warms your heart. The colors swirl there, mixing like paint in rain. They are not blue. They are not the clear blue that reminds you of summer skies and deep pools, of laughter and love. Mace’s flash intelligence and caring, not with passion and love as Qui-Gon’s often do. Oh….
You turn your eyes to look at the Jedi Master before you, now kneeling. His hands grasp yours and you shake your head with a movement intense enough to send you hair into dancing waves against your back. He looks to your hands and raises his head again.
“You must come with me to Coruscant immediately, Tira. You are needed.”
You gasp as another stray thought enters your mind. Is it Obi? Has something happened to your son? You open your mouth and gasp momentarily until the words fall out of your mouth. They are uttered in the calm that you have seen and experienced in Qui-Gon for the lifetime that you have spent with him. “Of course…let me see to that right away…if the ambassador would excuse me?”
At the man’s nod, you rise and grasp at Mace with a grimace. “I trust you will fill me in during the travel, Master Windu.”