Title: Mark of the Shaman
Author: Natalie L
Author Email: nat1228@comcast.net
Rating: NC-17
Status: Complete

Written: May-July 2000
Revised and expanded: January, 2002
Previously published by Agent With Style

Disclaimer: Pet Fly and Paramount own the copyright to The Sentinel and its characters. This piece of fan fiction was written solely for the love of the characters and to share freely with other fans. No profit is being made from the posting of this story.

Episode related: Warriors

Warnings: lyrics, m/m

Author's notes: Many thanks to Becky for the use of parts of her episode transcripts for "Warriors." You made my job much easier.

Thanks also to my intrepid betas: Allison and Heather-Anne, for the original version, and Heather-Anne and Kimberly for this revised and expanded version. Couldn't do it without you!

Summary: A new explanation for Blair's seizures emerges.

MARK OF THE SHAMAN
by Natalie L
nat1228@comcast.net

Oh I'm so cold, and so far away from my home
But tonight you're where I belong
You're everything right
When I'm everything wrong

=====||=====

The smells wafting down the hallway from his loft apartment made Jim Ellison's stomach rumble. He quickened his step, reaching the door and opening it to . . . darkness. Candles flickered throughout the loft, decorating every available surface with their golden light. The fireplace crackled cheerfully.

"Hey, Jim!" Blair greeted his roommate warmly from the kitchen. "Make yourself comfortable. Dinner's almost ready."

Jim noted his soulmate was dressed for a special occasion. He loved it when Blair let his hair hang loose, the dark curls softening the planes of his strong, square jaw. In typical Blair fashion, his clothing reflected his individualistic personality. Flowing down from his shoulders, the gold and brown batik-printed caftan had a distinctly African feel.

The table was set formally, with candles and flowers.

"What's going on here?" Jim eyed the younger man suspiciously.

Blair turned from the stove, casserole dish between oven-mitted hands. "It's our one-month anniversary of becoming an official couple," he explained. He set the dish on the table and turned to fetch the rest of their dinner.

As he placed the serving dishes next to the casserole, Jim's stomach rumbled again. Smiling, Blair began dishing up dinner. Handing Jim a plate, he chuckled. "Eat up. I want you strong and able for the rest of the evening."

"Oh yeah? What have you got in mind?" Jim asked, more hungry than curious at the moment.

"We can talk about that after dinner." Blair smiled enigmatically and sat down to his meal.

Jim ate enthusiastically, enjoying the mild curry that managed to just tingle his senses, without overloading them. Blair had the developed perfect touch for spices where his sentinel was concerned. Finally sated, he pushed back from the table and stood. He had begun clearing the dishes, when a soft hand on his arm stayed his progress.

"That can wait," Blair told him. "I'll take care of it later." He took hold of Jim's hand, pulling him toward the stairs to their bedroom. "For now, let me guide you." His voice dropped to a seductive whisper.

~~oO0Oo~~

Much to Jim's surprise, lightly fragranced candles lit their bedroom, as well. Blair led Jim over to the bed, pushing on his shoulders to make him sit on the mattress. He then stood directly in front of his lover, looking down into curious blue eyes. His hair hung loose around his face, soft and sensual.

Jim looked up into Blair's smoldering gaze. "You are so beautiful, Love." Reaching up, he pushed the long hair away from Blair's cheeks, tucking loose strands behind his ears. He then brushed his hands down along strong, square shoulders until reaching the ties to the flowing garment his lover wore. Teasing the knot free, he loosened the cords that bound the caftan closed. Pushing gently against the fabric, he watched as it cleared Blair's shoulders, slithering gracefully to the floor. Jim's gaze drank in the sight of Blair's body, naked and aroused.

"Like what you see?" his lover teased.

"Very much," Jim whispered, brushing fingertips lightly down the length of Blair's erection.

His cock twitched in response to the feather touch, and straddling Jim's lap, he sat down. A playful smile tugged at Blair's lips, as a moan of pleasure escaped on an exhalation of breath. Leaning in, he captured Jim's mouth in a passionate kiss. Tongues danced and explored, each tasting the sweetness of the other.

Blair's weight pressed Jim down against the mattress as his kiss continued to steal Jim's breath. Finally, he sat up, grinning down at the captive man. "Don't you think you're a little overdressed for this party?" he asked, his voice a sensual purr.

Blair began to slowly unbutton Jim's shirt, nimble fingers exposing bare skin to the cool air. Tugging the shirt tails from the older man's waistband, Blair finished his task, laying bare the vast expanse of well-muscled chest. His hands caressed the smooth skin, brushing lightly over sensitive nipples, teasing them.

Bending over, Blair licked one dark pink nub, then blew a puff of air, watching as it tightened almost painfully, eliciting a small gasp of surprise from its owner.

Jim squirmed beneath him as Blair unbuckled his belt and unzipped the fly of his jeans, releasing the pressure on his expanding cock. Standing to tug off the offending clothing, Blair finished exposing his prize. His satisfied smirk was quickly replaced with startled surprise as Jim sat up suddenly, wrapping his arms around the smaller man's chest, pinning his hands to his sides.

"What did I do to deserve you?" Jim's voice was an aroused growl.

"What makes you think you deserve me?" Blair continued to tease.

"I don't know that I do," Jim answered. "But deserve you or not, I own you!" Jim flipped the smaller man onto the bed, pinning him there.

Blair groaned as he felt the moist warmth of his conqueror's mouth engulf the head of his rigid cock. Soft lips suckled, while an adroit tongue traced the contours and ridges. With maddening slowness, he felt himself being pulled in, until his entire length was buried in that eager throat. Then his lover pulled back, scraping the sensitive skin with his teeth, eliciting moans and struggles from his captive. The suckling began again, and Blair bit his lip, willing himself not to come. "No!" he gasped. "No, Jim." Finding the strength somewhere within himself, he pulled away. "Tonight, I own you."

Jim could hardly contain his delight at the prospect of the normally submissive Blair becoming the dominant partner. A tremor of expectation threaded its way through his body as the man who had captured his heart reached across to the nightstand to snag the tube of K-Y Jelly.

"Kneel!" One brief moment of hesitation swept through Jim at that command. "Down on all fours!" The hand gently pressing against his back trembled slightly. Jim took solace in the fact that Blair was as nervous as he at this turn in their relationship. He smiled and complied with the command, resting on knees and elbows.

Kneeling beside Jim, Blair coated one finger with the lube. "I love you," he whispered, leaning in to kiss Jim tenderly. As he coaxed Jim's lips open to admit his tongue, he slid his finger past the tight sphincter muscle of his lover's anus. Jim's gasp at the intrusion nearly sucked the air from Blair's lungs. He broke the kiss to murmur into one perfectly shaped ear, "Relax. Let go. Just relax."

Jim tried to do as he was told, feeling a second finger, and then a third slide in to join the first. With slow, careful thrusts, Guide prepared Sentinel for the ultimate sensory experience.

"You're doing great," Blair purred, nibbling on an earlobe, then down Jim's neck to his shoulder.

Jim felt the fingers slide out, and surprised himself as he emitted an audible sigh of regret over the loss. Almost immediately, he felt a new pressure against his anus.

With great care, Blair pressed his cock against the ring of muscle. He felt Jim open for him, and he pushed in slowly, allowing Jim the time he needed to get used to the new sensation.

Moaning with the unexpected pleasure of being filled, Jim laid his head down on his hands, angling his buttocks for easier penetration by his shorter partner. Strong fingers wrapped around his flagging erection, stroking in time with the internal thrusts. It was all he could manage to hold still and let his partner bring him to climax. He felt himself climbing nearer to that precipice with each pounding thrust and accompanying stroke.

Just when he was certain he'd explode if something didn't happen soon, Blair changed the angle of his thrusts and stroked against Jim's prostate. The sensation threw him over the edge as his orgasm washed through him, spraying his chest and Blair's hand with hot semen.

Blair thrust harder, his desperate pounding losing its rhythm as the tight channel squeezed his cock, milking his own orgasm from him moments later. Panting slightly, Blair collapsed on top of his partner, pinning him to the bed.

Jim rolled slowly onto his side, careful not to dislodge Blair, whose semi-hard cock was still buried deeply within his body. Blair draped an arm around Jim's chest, sighing contentedly as he snuggled against the larger man's back.

Jim was about to drift into satiated sleep, when he felt the slight tremors running through his lover's body. "Blair?" No response. He spoke a little louder, "Blair? You all right?" When he still got no response, he pulled himself away from the comfortable embrace, turning to give Blair a long, hard look. What he saw nearly stopped his heart.

Blair's eyes had rolled back, unseeing. Totally unresponsive to Jim's attempts to rouse him, he watched helplessly as the tremors increased to full-fledged convulsions. When the shaking finally subsided, Jim pulled the blankets up over the cooling body.

"You awake yet, Blair?" he whispered. "C'mon, Buddy. Time to wake up. It's okay. You're going to be okay." He kept up the quiet chatter until Blair's eyelids fluttered open. "You scared me there, Sweetheart. What happened?"

"Shit!" Blair closed his eyes again, shutting out Jim's frightened look. "Damn!"

"Well, that's all very descriptive, but it doesn't tell me what just happened," Jim said, trying to stay calm and sound reasonable. "You had a seizure. You are taking the Klonopin, aren't you?"

"Yeah. I'm taking the damn Klonopin," Blair spat, unsure whether the anger he felt was directed at Jim or at himself. "Hell . . . you watch me take it three times a day!" He tried sitting up, but a wave of dizziness laid him out flat on his back. "But this . . . this was weird."

"Weird? How?" Jim rolled Blair onto his side and began massaging his back with a comforting, circular motion. He felt some of the tenseness drain from the smaller man's body and saw color return to the pale cheeks.

"I had a vision, or something. . . ."

"A vision? During the seizure?" Jim tried to comprehend, but was failing miserably. "What, exactly, did you see?"

"That was the really weird part," Blair said thoughtfully. "I was in a jungle, and I was running. But I wasn't me. I - I was a wolf."

"A wolf?"

"Yeah. And I heard something in the bushes ahead of me. A black jaguar ran out. We were headed right for each other." Blair paused and turned wide, blue eyes on Jim. "We both leapt at once . . . and merged in this blinding flash of white light. That was it. I woke up after that. Weird, huh?"

Jim looked thoughtful. "You dreamed of the jungle?"

"Yeah," Blair answered cautiously, "So? Any special meaning there?"

"Well, it's just that when I have my visions, I'm usually in the jungle."

"You know, Jim, in some tribal cultures epilepsy is considered the mark of a shaman. Of course, they don't call it epilepsy. They think the person is possessed by spirits. But. . . ."

"These seizures of yours . . . they started up again shortly after Incacha's death, didn't they?"

"Yeah, within a couple of weeks. Man, that is really weird!" Blair fought the post-seizure lethargy as his brain went into overdrive. He snuggled closer into the security of Jim's arms. "I was so worried when he passed on the 'way of the shaman' to me. I didn't feel any different. I didn't know anything more than I had before. I was just feeling my way through trying to help you. But a vision. . . . This is just so weird," he repeated, shaking his head.

"It might all just be a colossal coincidence, you know," Jim reasoned.

"Yeah, maybe."

"Did you ever have a vision before, during a seizure?"

"Not that I can remember. Well, except maybe, last week . . . oops." Blair ducked his head, irrationally hoping the sentinel beside him had not heard that last confession.

"What about last week, Sandburg?" Jim asked, dashing Blair's hopes. He turned on the young man, suddenly very serious. "Have you had other seizures you haven't told me about?" His anger was almost palpable.

"Just a couple," Blair managed to squeak.

"Over the last six weeks you've had two other seizures besides this one . . . while taking your medication? And you didn't tell me?" He clutched Blair's shoulders, shaking him a little more roughly than he'd intended, all memory of their recent lovemaking lost in a sea of fear.

The startled man looked at him apprehensively. "They've all been within the last week and a half. I didn't want you taking me back to the hospital. It isn't going to help! I'm taking the medication," Blair argued, his tone pleading for Jim to understand. "Doctor Freeman said there was a possibility of seizures even while taking the meds. This isn't that uncommon."

Jim shook his head. "What am I going to do with you?"

"Help me figure this out?"

"What?"

"The vision. What it means."

"You know I'm not into all that mystical mumbo-jumbo."

"I know what it felt like. . . ." Deep blue eyes locked with their lighter counterparts.

"What did it feel like, Blair?" Jim asked softly.

"Like we'd become one. One soul in two bodies. Bonded. Bound together for life." He paused, assessing the impact of his words on the man sitting next to him. "It felt like not even death could separate us."

Jim looked introspective for a moment, then shook it off. "It's sounding a bit too philosophical for me. . . ."

"Yeah. I told you it was weird."

"Well, 'weird' is your middle name, isn't it, Love?"

Blair turned a baleful gaze on his teasing partner and was rewarded with a kiss.

"Sleep now. You need your rest. We'll figure all this out later." With that, Jim snuggled under the blankets next to Blair, his eyes drooping shut with exhaustion.

~~oO0Oo~~

"I can't find anything wrong," Doctor Freeman said, looking over the charts of all the tests Blair had just finished being put through once again. "We can up the dosage of the Klonopin, or try another drug."

Blair groaned. "Must we?"

"Seizures are serious business, young man." Dr. Freeman turned a stern eye on his recalcitrant patient. "If you want to keep your driver's license, you have to prove you have them under control. Until you do, you're suspended."

"No. You can't suspend my driver's license!" Blair was aghast. "I've got classes at the U, and I help out at the police department. I need my transportation! I can't depend on Jim to take me everywhere I need to go."

"Well, then . . . we'll increase your dosage. Let's try doubling it to four milligrams, but cutting you down to just twice a day. How does that sound? Then, if that doesn't do it, we'll push you back to three times a day."

"I'm willing to give it a try, I guess." Blair's voice sounded defeated.

The doctor scribbled out two prescriptions, and handed them to his patient. "The first is for the stronger Klonopin," he explained. "The other is a mild stimulant, to help counteract the drowsiness." He held up a hand to stall the protest forming on Blair's lips. "Try it for a week. Let me know how it goes."

"He'll do it, Doc. Don't worry." Jim gave his partner his best no-nonsense stare.

Blair hopped off the exam table, returning the look with daggers. He did not appreciate being treated like a child.

"Thanks, Doc," Jim said as they turned to leave.

"Yeah, thanks," Blair added, an overtone of sarcasm lightly coloring his words.

"Brat," Jim said, once they were safely outside.

"Dictator," Blair replied, one arm firmly circling the waist of the larger man.

They climbed into the truck, and Jim headed back to the loft. The silence between the two men was one of comfortable camaraderie.

~~oO0Oo~~

"He made you Sentinel of the Great City, and me your Shaman," Blair argued. "Maybe there's something more to these seizures than just the epilepsy. I've never had a vision before. That's always been your shtick."

"Be reasonable, Blair," Jim answered, trying unsuccessfully to follow his own advice. "You can't really believe that Incacha is the cause of your seizures coming back."

"I didn't say that. All I'm saying is that there might be some connection between the seizures, the vision and me being a shaman." Blair paused, running a hand through his unruly hair. "I never felt comfortable with that designation, you know. Too much pressure, and nothing had changed. Now, something has."

"What? That you're scaring me shitless with these seizures?" Jim exploded. "Incacha can just take back his damn 'way of the shaman' if this is what it means!"

"Jim, calm down. It's okay, really." He pulled his partner closer, snuggling up against him. "Please don't be upset. Something wonderful happened. I don't quite understand it yet, but I finally feel important."

"You were always important to me," Jim whispered.

To be continued in Lessons...

RETURN to my fiction page.