Pairing: Clark/Lex
Rating: PG
Summary: Clark has to choose a college--but what are the real reasons behind his decision?
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone, much less these fine characters (if you know where I could buy them, please let me know *g*). I refuse to make any money off them in any event, so please don't sue me.
Spoilers: All Episodes


Choices
by Nicole D'Annais
Copyright 2002


Clark stared at the rock on the ground. He was convinced that if he focused his eyes just hard enough, he would be able to see actual molecules inside. His eyes had developed stronger abilities as time wore on, and all he had to do was concentrate on the X-Ray and remember not to fry the rock-

"Clark!"

He closed his eyes just in time to avoid rock incineration. "Way to sneak up on a guy, Chloe," he said, turning slowly to face his friend.

"I've been yelling your name for the last 100 yards. Losing your hearing so young?"

"Sorry, I was concentrating."

She grinned. "On which college you're going to?"

"On not thinking about which college I'm going to."

"Sorry," Chloe said, tilting her head. "Don't you have to choose a scholarship by Friday?"

Clark shrugged. "I could always skip college."

"Yeah, right. Because I know what you really want out of life is to stay here in Smallville and work on the farm."

"It's a good life."

Her mouth softened. "But it's not your life."

He turned and looked at the rock again. "No. It's just...I'm not sure if I should go to Kansas and be closer to my parents, or to Metropolis because it's exciting and--"

"And Lex Luthor will be there?"

He whirled back around to face her. "What?"

"Come on, Kent, I'm the best reporter this place has ever seen. Did you think I was just stupid when it came to you?"

"How...why...." *Damn.* He ran his hands through his hair, breathing deeply. "What is it you think you know?"

She laughed. "After that reaction, I don't *think* I know anything." When he just stared at her, she wrapped her hand around his upper arm. "Hey, you know I'd never say anything. I just spent all these years never talking about it. Figured why not bring it up now."

"Trying to force me to go to Kansas State so you can be rid of me?"

"No," she ground out, dropping her hand. "Trying to be a friend. You're telling me Lex Luthor doesn't fit into the equation on this decision?"

He ground his teeth for a moment before the words made it past his lips. "Not even remotely."

"Right, which is clearly evidenced by the fact that you nearly bit through your own jaw while emphatically denying he matters. Word to the wise, Clark--protesting too much is way more likely to cause suspicion."

"Chloe...." He sighed, too tired to fight her anymore. "Fine. He might conceivably fit into it somewhere, and I doubt it's anywhere you think, so can we please not talk about it anymore?"

She blinked a few times, and the hard reporter glare left her eyes. "Sure. So...coming to the big party--um...I guess not, huh?"

With a shake of his head, Clark started walking back to the house. "I have to be up early tomorrow to help with the chores."

"And that's never stopped you before," Chloe replied, following close beside him.

"Chloe..."

"Right, right. Consider it dropped," she said, smiling up at him. His sigh of relief was cut short as she added, "For now."

***

"...and LuthorCorp has great faith in the future of Smallville. Together, we can make the next one hundred years better than the last."

Clark applauded politely, only a desire not to draw attention to himself giving him any incentive to respond at all. Lex certainly hadn't lost any ability to convince with words or smiles. The citizens of Smallville certainly seemed fooled, slapping him on the back and shaking his hand like he was one of their own.

But he would never belong there.

Sure, everybody lied in Smallville, but the lies were more the variety of how big the deer was you shot, or how fast your car would really go. Real deceit, the kind the Luthors practiced, that wasn't something the residents of Smallville had experience with.

Unless you'd had the misfortune to get close to a Luthor.

Clark shook his head. This had been a mistake; he shouldn't have come. He turned back toward the truck, only to run smack into Chloe.

"Hey, watch it!"

"Sorry." His hands shot out to steady her. "Are you okay?"

She nodded. "Fine. Surprised to see you here, though. I thought you weren't coming."

"Yeah, well, I'm a big boy." He dropped his hands and stood as straight as he could. "It's silly of me to stay at home when everybody's here."

His spine stiffened all on its own at the amused words from behind him. "Clark Kent, a joiner. Now there's something I wouldn't have expected."

Carefully avoiding Chloe's eyes, Clark turned around. "Lex. Nice to see you."

"You never were a good liar."

Clark bit back the many retorts that came to mind. "Great speech," he ground out.

"Thanks. Hello, Chloe," Lex said, looking past Clark at the reporter silently watching their conversation.

"Lex," she said, smiling as she looked between them. "Gotta run, Clark. Larry's around here somewhere, probably getting into trouble without me."

Clark glared at her. "I'll go help you find him."

"No need." She held up her cell phone. "The wonders of modern technology--even in Smallville. Later."

He watched as she practically skipped off, then turned back to Lex. "So, how have you been?"

Lex shrugged. "How about you?"

"Fine."

"Ready to graduate?"

A slight smile touched the corner of Clark's mouth. "More than ever." He pushed aside the memories of all the times he'd wished for graduation for completely different reasons than the ones that were so important now.

"Planning your room for Kansas State?"

Clark frowned. "How did you know about that?"

"I make it my business to know about things that concern me."

"Last time I checked, I didn't concern you anymore."

With a wry grin, Lex shook his head. "You decided I didn't concern you. Nobody makes decisions for me but me."

"Are you sure? I thought your father had a hand in quite a few of them."

Lex stiffened, his eyes flashing for a brief moment in the sunset before his mask slipped back into place. "Apparently you did learn a thing or two when we--ah, but I forgot, that's not a topic for discussion, now, is it?"

"No." Clark cleared his throat. "Excuse me, I think I should go find my parents." He left before Lex could say another word.

***

Clark stared at the letters in his hand. Both offers from great schools...but which one should he choose? If he waited any longer, the decision would be made for him. Kansas State wanted an answer that day, and if he failed to respond, Metropolis University would be his only choice.

Lex. Despite what he'd told Chloe, if he were honest with himself, Clark knew the whole decision would be easy if he didn't have that one giant factor. For once, he wished Lex were living in Smallville again. Sure, he kept his castle, he ran the plant, and he even stayed in Smallville on occasion. But he spent most of his time in Metropolis.

Not that Clark had been keeping track.

He knew, deep down, what he wanted to do. Unfortunately, no matter how big Metropolis was, Lex would find ways to run into him. He'd done it several times since they'd...broken up? That didn't seem quite the right word for it. Blown up, maybe. An explosive argument to end an explosive relationship. Fitting, really.

Clark looked at the letters again, weighing each in his hands as if one might be heavier and therefore give him guidance on his choice.

"Morning, honey."

"Hey, Mom." Clark put the letters down on the kitchen table.

His mother glanced at them, but said only, "Want some breakfast?"

"No thanks. I ate."

The morning silence was broken only by the sounds of Martha fixing cereal until she sat down beside her son at the table. "So," she said between bites, "made your decision yet?"

Clark shook his head. "If I don't decide today, there isn't a choice."

"Have you asked Kansas State if they'll extend the deadline?"

Clark blinked. "I hadn't thought of that," he admitted, crossing the room and picking up the phone. The scholarship administrator was only too happy to grant him another week, which surprised Clark. "Are you sure? I know there must be other candidates waiting...."

"Oh, no. You are our only candidate, Mr. Kent. We set the deadline because the school needs the information, but I'm sure we can buy another week."

"I'm the only candidate?" Clark asked with a frown. "How can that be?"

"The Reniar Foundation does not offer scholarships on a regular basis, Mr. Kent. Only when we find an exceptional student with well-rounded abilities do we offer them a chance at an education."

The uneasy feeling in Clark's stomach twisted into a knot. "Thanks for the extension, Mr. Smith. I'll let you know as soon as I can."

"My pleasure."

Clark hung up the phone and stood staring at until his mother interrupted his thoughts. "Clark? What did they say?"

"They gave me another week," he answered absently.

"Good. Think you can decide by then?"

"I may not need that long," he said, picking up the truck keys. "I have to go see Chloe. I'll be back."

***

"So let me get this straight--they only offered you this scholarship because it's you, not because it's a normal thing?"

Clark nodded.

"You're right. That's weird."

"Chloe, can you find out who is behind the foundation? Who the past recipients were?"

"I can try."

Clark watched over her shoulder as Chloe hacked her way into enough places to make Clark feel like an accessory to computer crimes before she smiled triumphantly up at him. "There are no records of any past participants. And the Reniar Foundation is funded by a company called Cadmus Labs."

"Cadmus?" Clark pushed down on his mounting anger.

Chloe nodded. "Clark...Cadmus Labs is--"

"I know," he said shortly, grabbing his keys. "Thanks, Chloe."

"Sure."

The drive to Lex's castle took entirely too long, but it gave Clark a chance to calm down to a simmer from the boiling rage he'd started out with. Lex was still in Smallville--his favorite Jag was parked by the front door.

Without bothering to knock, Clark used the key he'd never gotten around to returning to enter the castle. It was mid-morning, so Lex would probably be in his office, if his habits hadn't changed.

They hadn't. He was standing beside his desk, his back to the door, staring at the stained glass window. "You took your time getting here, Clark."

"Having me followed?" Clark asked, closing the office door behind him as he walked into the room.

Lex laughed as he turned around. "I didn't have to. Mr. Smith called me right after he talked to you, and Chloe left enough footprints in my company records for a four-year-old to track."

"Then why'd you let her stay in there?"

"Because I knew kicking her out would only prolong the inevitable."

"Reniar Foundation...Rainer Field...I can't believe I didn't figure it out sooner."

Lex shrugged. "You saw what you wanted to see, as always."

Clark let that comment pass for the moment. "Why that name?"

"Call me sentimental. It was where you first kissed me."

"You kissed me. And I'm well aware where it was. Did you think I was too stupid to figure it out?"

Taking a few steps closer, Lex shook his head. "Maybe I wanted you to."

"You wanted me to owe you--"

"I wanted you to have what you wanted," Lex said, the words ground out of him. "A good school, one that got you away from me. Isn't that what you wanted, Clark?"

"No, I--" He stopped for a moment. "Yes. I did. But I'm not taking it. I have a perfectly good scholarship to a school I want to go to, one that I got all on my own, thank you. And if that means being in the same city with you, then so be it. It's a big city."

"Not that big," Lex said, his voice softer now, his eyes holding Clark's like magnets pulling at metal.

Clark inhaled deeply. "You're telling me you wouldn't have found a thousand excused to run into me at Kansas State? Or here?" Lex's only answer was silence. "You can't control me, Lex."

"I don't want to control you."

Clark threw up his hands. "Yes, you do! You're trying to control my future, just like you tried to control my past. Isn't it enough that you know already? You can destroy me anytime you want. Why try for more control?"

"It was never about control. It was about secrets."

Clark snorted. "Oh, and you had no secrets of your own?"

"So it was okay for you to investigate my secrets, but I wasn't even allowed to ask questions?"

They stared at each other, a stalemate eerily reminiscent of their final argument six months before. That memory prodded Clark's thoughts. "You know," he said gruffly. "How can you not understand the importance of keeping that secret now that you know?"

"You were a teenage farmboy in the middle of Kansas. I mean, Smallville has a lot of weirdness, but could I have been expected to consider your biggest secret was that you were from another planet?"

"Did you think I would keep things secret if they weren't huge? Did I expect you to tell me LuthorCorp secrets?"

"No, but you damn well didn't stop asking about anything you wanted to know in my past."

Clark ran a hand through his hair. "I...." He closed his eyes. Lex had known everything for six months, and his secret was still safe. The earth hadn't fallen off its axis, the sky hadn't turned green, and government scientists hadn't whisked him off to secret labs to cut him open.

He looked at Lex again. "I'm sorry," he said finally, his voice a near whisper.

"What?"

"I'm sorry," he said, clearer this time. "You're right. I didn't think...I kept pushing anytime you had a secret, and all the time...."

"You were lying to me."

"I wasn't lying."

Lex raised an eyebrow. "'You didn't hit me with your car,'" he mimicked. "'I'm just a normal guy.'"

One corner of Clark's mouth turned up. "I am a normal guy."

"You can bench press buildings."

"I never said normal for *where*."

At that, Lex laughed. "The art of lying by telling the truth."

"I learned a few things from you," Clark shot back. He had to wet his lips as Lex took a few steps closer.

"I remember," Lex said, the blue of his eyes narrowing until they were nearly all black. His gaze dropped to Clark's mouth.

Clark caught himself as his hand was reaching for Lex's belt buckle. "This is a bad idea."

"No." Lex shook his head. "Waiting six months to clear this up, that was a bad idea."

"But it's not cleared up."

One pale hand traced its way up Clark's shirtfront. "Close enough. We can work out the details later."

Clark shivered at the first touch of Lex's fingers on his neck before taking a step backwards. "No."

"No?"

"No."

Lex groaned. "Tease."

"I want to talk."

"Fine," Lex said, reaching for the hem of Clark's shirt. "I can tell you about all the different ways I want to f--"

"Lex."

With a heavy sigh, Lex carefully put the shirt back into place. "Okay, talk."

"You never told me," Clark said, his attention firmly on Lex's face.

"Told you what?"

"How you found out."

Lex closed his eyes, rubbing the back of his neck. "You were so pissed I'd found out at all, you never stuck around to ask."

"I'm asking now."

Eyes open again, Lex gave him a wry look. "You're asking me to give up all my secrets?"

"You already have all of mine."

"Fair enough." Lex said, sitting on the edge of the desk. "It was Chloe, actually."

Clark blinked. "What? But Chloe doesn't know."

"Not as far as I can tell, no. I walked into the Torch offices one day, looking for you, and she was pretty intent on some files on her computer. The speed with which she closed them when she realized I was there made me curious."

Clark raised his eyebrows. "So you read her files?"

Lex nodded. "She had your adoption records, which were pretty fishy, by the way."

"She told me she dropped that years ago."

"You knew she was investigating you and you did nothing?"

Clark shrugged. "She found them doing a class project a couple of years ago, but she promised to drop it."

"You should've made sure all the files were gone."

With a look of grim determination, Clark sighed. "I will now."

"No need. I took care of them."

He had a sudden memory. "Her computer virus...you did that?"

Lex nodded, his eyes tracing their way down Clark's neck to the opening of his shirt. "I hope she didn't lose anything important," he said in a low voice, leaning forward a bit.

"Only half that week's issue of the Torch," Clark responded, fighting the urge to lean closer. "She was up for two days straight fixing it."

With a shrug, Lex's eyes moved to Clark's forearm, his gaze almost a tangible caress. Clark shivered, but all Lex said was, "A small price to pay."

"Lex, you can't do stuff like that. Not for me."

He looked up in surprise. "So you're allowed to save me, but I can't save you?"

"Saving a person from bodily harm is one thing; running over people to turn the world to your liking is something else entirely."

"I protected your secret. How is that wrong?"

Clark stepped back. "Chloe would never have done anything to hurt me."

"Then why did she keep the records after she told you she'd dropped it?"

"I don't know," he said as he took a another step back. "But I know she wouldn't hurt me."

"She can't now. Not without those files."

"She can always just get them again."

Lex slid off the desk, moving closer to Clark again. "There is no record of the Metropolis United Charities anywhere in existence."

"Did you spend the last six months cleaning up my past or something?"

"Only about a month of it," Lex said, reaching out to touch, but Clark stepped back further. Lex sighed. "And only part time. It wasn't that difficult."

Clark shook his head slowly. "You know more about my past than I do."

"Do you want to know?"

He thought about it for a long moment, then shook his head again. "No."

"I can tell you anytime. But be very sure you're ready to hear it before you ask."

"And if something happens to you?"

Lex's mouth tightened. "Then the information goes with me. I will not let anyone find out about your secret."

"Don't make promises you can't keep, Lex."

"Who said I couldn't keep them?"

Clark raised the other man's chin, making sure their eyes met. "I don't want you breaking the law for me."

"I know," Lex whispered, turning his head to rub against Clark's hand.

Clark sighed as Lex's lips reached his palm. "I have to go," he said, dropping his hand quickly.

"Off to call Metropolis University?" Lex asked a little too casually.

"Maybe," Clark said, a hint of a smile hovering around his mouth.

"So, will I see you around in Metropolis, then?"

The smile grew a little more. "Maybe," he answered.

"And there's no way I can convince you to stay?" Lex asked softly.

"I have to go," he said firmly.

Lex closed his eyes for a brief moment. "Fine," he said with a deep sigh. "Go...before I try anyway."

With one last smile, Clark walked out of the room. Lex turned to the security camera to watch as Clark got into his truck, then reached for the phone.

"Mr. Myers, Lex Luthor. Clark Kent will be accepting the Metropolis University scholarship. You should hear from him this afternoon, I think, so I just wanted to make sure everything is in order. And be sure he gets a room *without* a roommate." He hung up the phone and stared at the security monitor until Clark's truck was completely out of sight.

---
END



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