Copyright: Augest 2002 by Robin R. Neher

THIS STORY IS WRITTEN FOR PLEASURE AND IS NOT INTENDED TO INFRINGE ON ANY PREEXISTING COPYRIGHTS THAT MAY BE VIOLATED. FEEL FREE TO SHARE WITH FRIENDS, BUT NOT FOR PROFIT. THIS STORY IS FICTIONAL, A WORK OF THE WRITER'S IMAGINATION. THE CHARACTERS AND INCIDENTS USED IN THIS STORY ARE PURELY FICTIONAL AND ARE NOT BASED ON ANY PERSON AND/OR PERSON'S ACTUAL EXPERIENCES.

Title: A real morale buster

Author: Robin R. Neher

Rating: R

Pairing: N/A

Archive: Yes

Fandom: Emergency!

Summary: Johnny's irresponsibility causes the station to lose one of it's own. This story is loosely based on the episode, "The promise".

Content Warning: Main character death (sort of). Harsh Language. HANKY ALERT!!

A real morale buster

by Robin R. Neher

In a heartbeat, it was over. Two Paramedics could only watch as a blanket was placed over the lifeless body.

"I'm sorry, Fellas, there was just nothing I could do." The doctor informed them. "The wounds were just too severe."

Johnny Gage just stood there as Roy DeSoto quickly walked out of the treatment room.

"You okay, Son?" The veterinarian asked Johnny.

"How am I gonna tell the other guys?" John wondered. "Boot was station 51's mascot."

"I see." The vet nodded.

"It's my fault he's dead." Johnny continued. "If I'd only just given Samantha back to Paula, this wouldnt've happened."

"Johnny, you didn't know that Sam would attack Boot." The Vet soothed.

"Johnny, we've got a run." Roy interrupted.

"See ya." Johnny waved to the vet, then followed Roy to the squad.

*
As soon as the squad got back to the station an hour later, Roy turned to John.

"Have you thought of what you're gonna tell the guys?" Roy asked.

"Roy, I can't decide what to even tell myself yet." Johnny answered. "I didn't mean for any of this to happen."

"Try telling that to those four in the other room." Roy replied. "They're all waiting and wondering about him. Johnny, even though you didn't care for Boot, there are some of us who did. All of our morale depends on you now."

With that, Roy left Johnny to his thoughts. He joined the others in the kitchen. As he walked in, Cap and the other guys immediately knew that the news was not good.

"He's gone." Captain Hank Stanley guessed.

Roy nodded.

"The damage was too severe." Roy said, quietly.

"That stupid Gage!" Cap hissed. "Why does he always have to make things so hard?!"

"Cap, the decision should've been Johnny's to begin with." Roy offered.

"It was my station." Hank countered. "Roy, where's John now?"

"He was out in the squad." Roy replied.

"Good." Hank nodded. "If he were here right now, I'm not sure that I could control myself."

Chet and the others all nodded their agreement, tears spilling down their cheeks.

"If it makes you feel any better, Boot didn't suffer at all." Roy told them.

"It doesn't." Marco Lopez sobbed.

"It doesn't for me either." Chet sniffed. "I feel like beating the crap outta Gage right now. He murdered Boot."

"Chet," Roy warned.

"Roy, Johnny deliberately turned Sam loose, knowing full well what would happen!" Hank cried.

Roy had to admit that Hank was right. Johnny had seen the two dogs get into it from the moment that Sam had first arrived at the station. At the point, Roy realized that to defend his partner now would only make things worse.

*

As the rest of the guys sat in silence around the kitchen table, Engineer Mike Stoker went to find Johnny. Passing through the bay, Mike saw the squad was now empty.

"Johnny?!" Mike called.

"In here!" Johnny called from the office.

"Johnny, what are you doing in here?" Mike asked. "You should be in the kitchen with us."

"You sure you want a murderer among you?!" Johnny sneered.

"Chet didn't mean that." Mike soothed.

"Mike, I heard the guys talking and I don't blame them. I killed Boot." Johnny insisted. "If only I had done what Stanley wanted, Boot would still be here. Now, I got what I wanted, but it cost Boot his life."

"Where's Sam now?" Mike asked.

"At my place. My new landlady's taking care of her." Johnny replied. "A new owner is taking over the building and has decided to allow pets."

"So, things are working out." Mike replied.

"At least on the home front." Johnny replied.

"Johnny, things will work out here too." Mike promised. "We all know you didn't mean for Boot to get hurt, it's just that in grief, it's hard to remind ourselves of that sometimes. I also understand the place you were stuck in too with Paula."

Johnny looked up from the logbook he was writing in.

"You do?" Johnny asked.

"Yeah, you were in the heat of a rescue when you promised to look after the dog. I understand that. I also understand that you didn't wanna let Paula down." Mike smiled.

"I did promise." Johnny sniffed.

"And you didn't plan on Paula being in the hospital that long either." Mike understood. "And you certainly didn't plan on getting one of Bonnie's puppies."

"Stanley had no right to make me give up the dog!" Johnny cried.

"Johnny, Stanley was only doing what he thought was right." Mike soothed. "He didn't want you to give her up, he just wanted what was best for all of us, Boot too. How long have you been with the department?"

"Almost four years." Johnny replied.

"Not long." Mike nodded. "Johnny, when you have a few more under your belt, you'll realize that you have to build an emotional wall of sorts. You see, those guys in there and me have seen alot of death and destruction in our jobs. When you see what we do everyday on this job, you have to be careful not to get too involved with any one victim or a victim's pet. You do and your emotions get torn up and you're no longer effective as a fireman or a Paramedic."

"That's why you didn't wanna help me with Bonnie." Johnny realized.

"If we had, would you have learned anything?" Mike asked. "Don't you agree that we better served you by not helping you with her?"

Before Johnny could answer, the tones sounded.

Station 51, structure fire at the bakery. 4798 W. Morgan Ave. 4798 W. Morgan Ave. Crosstreet: Shell. Timeout: 13:25.

"Station 51, KMG-365." Hank responded as the rest scrambled toward the trucks.

As soon as Cap was aboard, Mike guided engine 51 from the station behind the squad, lights and sirens blaring. When the engine and squad arrived on scene minutes later, Cap got on the radio.

"LA, station 51 at scene. We have a bakery with smoke showing! Respond a first alarm assignment!" Cap requested.

Station 51. LA returned.

"Chet, Marco, pull an inch and a half!" Cap directed, getting off the engine. "Roy, John, inch and a half!"

Johnny and Roy quickly donned their gear and pulled hose off the engine. They then made their way in as the employees were making their way out of the bakery. Upon arrival inside, the crew was met with a smoking oven.

"What happened, Sir?" Roy asked, his voice muffled by his mask.

"I was baking bread when all the sudden, the oven started smoking." The baker told Roy.

"Okay, are you hurt?" Roy asked.

"I don't think so." The man replied.

"Look, you get outta here. We'll take care of this." Roy said. "Cap! Get this guy outta here!"

"Right!" Hank replied, his voice muffled by his own mask. "Marco, shut off the gas, Pal!"

"Right, Cap!" Lopez replied as Cap led the baker to safety outside.

*

A few minutes later, the smoky fire was under control and all there was left to do was overhaul and salvage. Cap was on the HT.

LA, station 51. This fire is under control. Cancel first alarm assignment. Station 51 out twenty minutes!" Cap reported.

All units with station 51, cancel. Sam advised.

*

A few minutes later, the squad was on it's way to Rampart for supplies. As he drove, Roy couldn't help but notice that his partner had suddenly grown quiet.

"You okay?" Roy asked.

"It's so easy to forget when you're on a run." Johnny said.

"Boot." Roy guessed.

"Yeah." Johnny nodded. "I never knew how attached the guys were to that little mutt."

"It happens." Roy replied.

"I'm not sure how I'm gonna tell B and C-Shifts about Boot." Johnny sighed. "He was just a dog, Roy, but everyone at the station acts as if one of us had died."

"For many people, losing a dog or cat is the same as losing a human family member. The grief process is the same for both." Roy offered.

"How can I ever face those men, knowing they think I'm a murderer?" Johnny wondered. "How do I know that they aren't right? Everyone knows that Boot and I had a rocky relationship. Everyone knows what a jerk I can be too."

"Johnny, I'm gonna tell you a story that I haven't told anyone." Roy decided. "I've told you about my brother, haven't I?"

"He's in a wheelchair, right?" Johnny replied.

"That's him." Roy nodded. "Anyway, one day, I guess he was about twenty-one then, our cat had given birth to kittens about five weeks before the accident happened. Anyway,-"

Before Roy could finish the story, the squad's radio buzzed to life.

Squad 51, stand by for response. Dispatch advised.

"I'll tell ya the rest later." Roy promised as he and Johnny strapped on their helmets and got ready for the call coming in.

Engine 51 with squad 51, maternity case. 111 W. Ashley Ave. 111 W. Ashley Ave. Crosstreet: 10th. Timeout: 13:35.

"Squad 51, 10-4." Johnny acknowledged as Roy turned on the lights and sirens.

Engine 51,10-4. Cap was heard to respond.

The squad was first on scene, followed by the engine minutes later. Cap, Johnny and Roy made their way up to the house while the rest of the guys waited with the rig.

"Fire department. Did you call us?" Cap asked of a woman with gray hair.

"I tried calling the vet, but-" The woman in her eighties began.

"Wait a minute! Are you saying that the woman in labor is a dog?!" Hank demanded. "Ma'am, you want a veterinarian, not the fire department!"

"I tried to call Mitsy's vet, but he's not in his office!" The woman answered. "Please, you have to help her!"

"Cap?" Johnny called to him, leading him away from the woman.

"John, if you're suggesting bringing that dog back to the station-" Cap warned.

"Cap, she said her vet wasn't in!" Johnny hissed. "How bout a little compassion, You Son of a bitch?! That little Scottie there is about to have puppies! We are sworn to save lives, Dammit, and that includes dogs! I watched one dog die today and I'll be damned if you make me just stand here and watch as another dog and her babies meet the same fate!"

Cap looked pleadingly at Roy. Roy just threw up his hands in surrender.

"Johnny, go ahead." Roy told him. "Just don't ask me or the other guys to be a part of it."

"Roy!" Hank protested.

"Cap, just let him go." Roy advised. "It'll give him a chance to cool off."

"Okay." Cap sighed as Johnny led the woman and her dog out to the squad.

*

An hour later, Roy waited as Johnny backed the squad into 51's apparatus bay.

"You wanna tell me what that blow up was about? What would make you think that Cap has no compassion?" Roy wanted to know as Johnny exited the squad.

"Roy, I really don't feel like talking right now." Johnny sniffed.

"Johnny? What happened, Partner?" Roy asked.

"The puppies didn't make it." Johnny replied.

"They all?-" Roy began, but trailed off.

"All six of them." Johnny replied, then lost it.

"Johnny, I'm sure you did all you could." Roy offered.

"Dammit, Roy!" Johnny cried. "That's seven dogs that died under my care! I am a murderer!"

At this time, engine 51 arrived back at the station, having spent time working a house fire with station 86. Cap was first off the engine. When he saw Johnny, he tore into him.

"Gage, if you ever speak to me like you did at that lady's house again-" Cap began.

"Lay off, you blowhard!" Johnny hissed.

Cap lunged for Johnny, but Mike Stoker stepped in before any punches could fly, restraining his Captain.

"Alright, that's enough!" Marco Lopez yelled. "What is happening here?! Ever since we found out about Boot, Johnny's been taking Cap's head off and all the rest of us have been punishing Johnny fore a crime he never committed! We're supposed to be friends and compadres here! We're fighting when we should all be supporting each other! John, you need to get your emotions in check! Cap, you need to lay off! You too, Kelly! Roy, you should be offering to help Johnny, not refusing to help cause you don't think it's right to do so! Johnny, I want you to go in the dorm and take a nap!"

With that, the crew all went in their own directions, with Johnny going to his bunk for a nap. Though he wasn't tired, Johnny knew that he needed to get his emotions back under control.

*

A few minutes after Johnny disappeared into the dorm, Chet approached Marco.

"Marco, we all loved Boot." Chet said.

"You don't think I know that?" Marco replied as he fixed a light lunch in the kitchen. "I also know that there's a man in that dorm whose emotions are running all over right now!"

"Well, it's his own damn fault." Chet stated. "If he had just let Cap call in animal control, that wouldn't have happened."

"Chet, Johnny cared about that lady!" Marco hissed.

"Yeah, and while he was off playing knight in shining armor, a person could've been having a major medical crisis!" Chet shot back. "A person! What if that had been you, me or even Cap that needed that squad and it was tied up on Gage's personal errand of mercy? I wonder if John would be able to live with himself then?!"

*

In the dorm, Johnny just listened as Chet's words filtered his way. As he thought over what Chet was saying, he came to realize that Chet's point was valid. A few minutes later, Hank entered the dorm.

"John?" Hank began.

"Yeah?" Johnny replied.

"I'm sorry about the pups, Pal." Hank said. "Roy told me what happened."

"Cap, I tried to get there as fast as I could!" Johnny wept. "It was just like Boot all over again!"

"You mean like Drew." Cap realized.

"In my heart, I know that Chet's right too." Johnny sobbed.

"It just takes awhile to make your head see that." Cap understood.

"Cap, I've been such a jerk today." Johnny sniffed.

"No more than we were to you." Hank soothed. "I know you never meant for Boot to die. It was just his time."

"I just wish I could make it up to you guys." Johnny sniffed. "I was awful out of my guilt about Boot. I just gotta get a thicker skin, that's all."

"No, Johnny, we need caring people like you in this job." Roy smiled as he brought in a furry visitor.

"Sam!" Johnny smiled, wiping his tears.

"I thought Sam here would be excellent therapy for all of us." Cap added. "Johnny, I hope that in having Sam in your life, you'll learn the love and joys owners feel for pets."

"I do, Cap, I do." Johnny smiled, then kissed the dog's muzzle.

END PART 6