Copyright: May 2001 By Robin R. Neher

THIS STORY IS WRITTEN FOR PLEASURE AND IS NOT INTENDED TO INFRINGE ON ANY PREEXISTING COPYRIGHTS THAT MAY BE VIOLATED. FEEL FREE TO SHARE WITH FRIENDS, BUT NOT FOR PROFIT.

THIS STORY IS FICTIONAL, A WORK OF THE WRITER'S IMAGINATION. THE CHARACTERS AND INCIDENTS USED IN THIS STORY ARE PURELY FICTIONAL AND ARE NOT BASED ON ANY PERSON AND/OR PERSON'S ACTUAL EXPERIENCES.

Title: Chet's Madness

Author: Robin R. Neher

E-mail: NRobin1027@aol.com

Rating: PG

Pairing: N/A

Archive: Yes

Summary: Set shortly after the E! ep, "Promotion", Chet places blame for his low test scores on the shoulders of a certain handsome Paramedic.

Content Warning: Some harsh Language.

Chets Madness
by Robin R Neher

Johnny whistled as he pinned on his badge before the start of his shift at station 51. Chet's eyes narrowed as he too changed for work.

"Gage, shut up!" Chet said through his teeth. "Just once, can't you do things quietly?!"

Johnny just ignored Chet and left the lockeroom, much to the Irishman's relief. In the eyes of Chester B. Kelly, John Roderick Gage was to blame for his not making the top ten on his Engineer's test.

If It hadn't been for Johnny, I might have made Engineer. Chet thought. Johnny and his gripes, his projects, his creative kicks! How was I supposed to study with that around?

As Chet finished changing, he swore Johnny would get his before shift's end.

___________________________________

After roll call, Johnny went to clean the latrine, Chet followed Johnny and locked the latrine door behind them.

"Payback time, Gage!" Chet yelled. "You know that card game you created? I fixed it so you'd lose! Oh, and look what I have here, your precious camera! The one you used to bug everyone in the station for candid shots!"

Johnny watched as Chet took the film out, then smashed the expensive camera to the floor. Chet then laughed as he took a pair of scissors from his pocket then cut the film to ribbons as John cried.

"What have we here, Johnny?" Chet sneered unrolling the poster which usually hung in Johnny's locker and lighting it aflame. "Watch her burn, John. Watch as Miss October burns before your eyes!"

John sobbed hysterically as the poster went up in smoke. A second later, the door unlocked, allowing Cap and Roy to enter. Roy immediately rushed to his best friend's side while Cap extinguished the poster fire.

"How could you?!" Roy demanded of Chet. "What'd Johnny ever do to you?!"

"Chet, why?" Hank asked as Roy led a distraught John from the latrine.

"Cap, he owed me!" Chet replied. "Johnny owes me! If it hadn't been for him, I might be an Engineer now!"

"Are you blaming John for your scoring 75th on your exam?" Hank asked.

"You bet I am!" Chet yelled. "Him and his ideas, projects, kicks whatever! Johnny destroyed my future!"

"Chet, why were you studying on duty anyway?" Cap asked. "Why couldn't you study at home?"

"Cap, I did study at home, but I wanted to study during the lull times too. Johnny always has to do something that's annoying or noisy! He always has to do it here!"

"Chet, you can't just ask the station to be quiet so you can study. Everyone needs their hobbies on duty or they'd go crazy."

"I know, Cap, but I need to focus on my future. I'm not getting any younger." Chet replied. "I have potential to be a Battalion Chief someday while Johnny will never be anything other than a Paramedic."

"Chet, that was uncalled for!" Cap told him.

"Cap, I'm telling the truth! Johnny is too dumb to make it past firefighter!" Chet argued. "I take my job seriously, unlike him."

__________________________________

In the rec room, Johnny sat numbed by what Chet had just said.

"I don't take my job seriously." Johnny whispered. "Just because I love what I do, I'm a dummy according to Chester B. Kelly."

"John, Chet's just upset right now." Roy soothed.

"Why is he so upset? He can test again next year." John said.

"Johnny, Chet studied his brains out to take that exam. Seventy-fifth is a low score and wasn't what he was hoping for." Roy replied. "It's not your fault though."

"Tell that to Chet!" Johnny hissed. "Kelly, get your ass out here!"

Chet ran out of the latrine, along with Cap.

"Cap, can you get me a copy of the Engineer's test?" Johnny asked.

"I guess." Hank shrugged. "Why?"

"Chet, I'll bet you a month's latrine duty that I can pass that test and score better than you!" Johnny challenged.

"You're on!" Chet smiled.

___________________________

"John, you're not eligible to be Engineer." Roy reminded his friend.

"Roy, I'm just taking this to show Kelly here that even I can pass! I'm not looking to be promoted." Johnny argued. "Will you lend me your manuals?"

"Nope. I refuse to help you humiliate yourself." Roy replied. "Johnny, you're just doing this to show Chet you're better than he is. I think it's both childish and stupid! Captain, do not let them do this!"

"Oh, now I'm childish?!" Johnny yelled. "Roy, you don't want to help me, fine!"

With that, Johnny stormed into the bay.

"Johnny, Roy's right!" Mike Stoker agreed as he checked engine fifty-one's pumps. "If you wanna take the test, do it for real!"

"You mean with the possibility of getting promoted?" Johnny asked.

"Yes, you think you're ready to be an Engineer, start studying for the test and taking the classes at the academy!" Mike insisted. "You'll be eligible next test period."

"Okay, I will!" Johnny smiled. "It's time for more action and less talk!"

ONE MONTH LATER.........

Johnny Gage sat at the kitchen table at 51's, books and papers spread all around him as did Chet. Cap oversaw their studies.

"Boy, you have to know all this?" Johnny gaped.

"Every word." Cap smiled. "And, John? If you score in the top ten on the written, you'll have to go before the promotions board."

Johnny froze at those words.

"C'mon, Junior, what are you afraid of?" Chet teased. "You had to do that to become a Fireman."

"What kind of questions do they ask?" A suddenly nervous Johnny asked.

"Fireman Gage, As an Engineer in this department, how are you gonna help us move forward in a positive direction?" Roy quizzed. "Those are the kind of questions the board will ask, if you make it that far."

Roy snickered as he poured a glass of milk for himself from the jug in the fridge.

______________________________

Later that night, Mike, Roy and Hank met in the dormitory.

"How's Gage doing so far?" Mike whispered.

"He's really sweating." Cap giggled. "He'll crack under the pressure soon enough."

"What do you say we turn up the heat on old John?" Mike suggested. "I think this is all talk."

"Me too. Just more of Gage's hot air." Roy agreed. "Johnny just loves shooting his mouth off, but when the pressure's really on, he runs like a scared rabbit."

"Oh, he run all right when you tell him that to be an Engineer, he'll have to leave the medics." Cap smiled at Roy. "We aim to make Johnny give up on this test. Are you with us, Roy?"

"You bet." Roy grinned. "What's the plan?"

______________________________

Two days later, the guys put their plan in motion. Just after roll call, Roy took Johnny outside for a chat.

"John, do you know what an Engineer's duties entail?" Roy asked.

"I know that it'll mean leaving the Paramedics." Johnny replied. "I also know that it means not only driving the rig, but also making sure that the hoses are charged at a fire or rescue and making sure they have enough water pressure. It also means being ready to take command if the Captain is injured."

"That's part of it." Roy agreed. "Being an Engineer also means that you'll rarely get to help on calls. You must stay with the engine unless Cap orders you in for some reason. Are you prepared to do that?"

"I guess I'll have to if I'm promoted." John shrugged.

"Johnny, you remember what I was like when I was up for Engineer." Roy reminded the younger man. "I just couldn't leave the Paramedics."

"I know." Johnny nodded. "I'll cross that bridge if and when I get there. Thanks for your concern, Pally."

With that, Johnny went back inside the station.

"Anytime, Junior." Roy muttered to himself as he followed.

______________________________

Later that night, after everyone else was in bed, Chet snuck over to Johnny's bunk.

"Hey, John." Chet whispered, shaking the other man to wake him.

"Chet, it's two in the morning!" Johnny griped, sleepily. "What the fuck do you want?!"

"Wanna take the engine for a joyride?" Chet softly giggled.

"Chet, that's crazy! Now go back to bed!" Johnny grumbled as he turned over. "Good night!"

Boy, what a grouch! Chet thought as Johnny drifted back to sleep.

Chet then snuck back over to his own bed and donned his turnout pants and boots. Chet then tiptoed to the apparatus bay and took the engines keys down off their hook on the wall. Chet snickered as he then got in on the driver's side and started the motor.

In the dorm, Cap woke, hearing the engine roar to life. Jumping out of bed, Hank rushed into the bay.

"Kelly! Get out of there...NOW!" Cap yelled.

"Up yours, Stanley!" Chet sneered, then stared driving the engine out of the bay.

"Kelly, I gave you an order!" Hank shouted.

Chet just ignored Cap and gunned the engine. Cap tried to get out of the way, but wasn't fast enough. The engine ran over his foot.

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Cap screamed as the truck crushed his left foot.

Roy and the others came running, hearing their commander's painful scream. All the others could do was gape as the engine pulled out of the station, made a left and slowly disappeared from view. Roy then called it in on the station's CB and requested an ambulance as Johnny started tending to Hank's injuries. a few minutes after the call, Chief Hout arrived, along with the ambulance.

"Hank, what happened?" The concerned Battalion Chief asked.

"Chet Kelly took off with engine fifty-one, running over Cap in the process!" Mike replied, angrily.

"Stoker, get on the radio and see if you can raise Chet!" The Chief ordered.

"Yes, Sir." Stoker replied as Hank was loaded into the ambulance for transport to Rampart General. Johnny then got in beside him. Roy got into the squad and followed the ambulance toward the hospital.

___________________________

As Hank was being taken to the hospital, Mike was trying to reach Chet.

"Station 51 to Engine 51, Come in." The Engineer called into the mic.

"This is Kelly." Chet's voice came back.

"Chet, get that engine back here!" Mike ordered.

"No way, Pal." Chet came back. "If I can't be an Engineer, then I'll just have to settle for the engine. Mike, It doesn't take smarts to do your job."

"Chet, it takes special training to drive a fire engine and operate it's pumps." Mike told him.

"All you have to know is basic math and physics." Chet came back. "It don't take brains to read a bunch of Gages."

"No, but you have to know how much pressure a hose can take." Mike answered. "You also have to know the right way to park and drive the engine. It ain't like driving a car, Chet. You also have to maintain the engine and make sure it's operationally ready at all times. Chet, pull the engine over before something happens."

"Sorry, Mikey, no can do." Chet came back. "I can be an Engineer. I don't care what some test says!"

"Okay, you can be an Engineer." Mike agreed. "But an Engine can't function with a crew of one. You have to have help. Why not swing by and pick us up?"

"Agreed." Chet replied. "No funny business though."

"You have my word." Mike promised. "We'll be waiting."

"10-4," Chet replied. "Engine 51 out."

"Station 51 out. KMG-365." Mike replied, then hung up the mic.

"Stoker, are you nuts?!" Cheif Hout demanded.

"Chief, hear me out. Chet's frustrated. That's why he's doing this. We all know how hard it is to be promoted. You work and slave and study to exhaustion, only to find out your score is low and you won't even be considered for promotion. The next year, you test again, but do worse. That's what happened to Chet." Mike explained. "Chet feels like he'll never make it."

"But we have to have standards." The Chief argued.

"I know, Sir." Mike replied. "But to someone like Chet, those standards are hard to live up to. What made it even worse was that DeSoto tested too and scored 9th. Chet was crushed by that."

"Maybe DeSoto's smarter." The Chief shrugged.

"No, DeSoto's just has more time in the fire service and is a bit more seasoned." Mike replied. "Sir, I'd like to deal with Chet myself if you don't mind. I think he needs understanding, not punishment right now."

"Okay, Mike, he's all yours." The Chief nodded, then left for Rampart to check on Hank.

Mike then turned to Marco.

"Marco, could you wait in the dorm, please?" Mike requested.

Marco nodded and walked in there. A second later, the engine pulled into the bay. Mike approached as Chet turned off the motor. Chet looked at the other man with tears on his cheeks. As he climbed down off the engine, the Irishman collapsed in Mike's arms and sobbed, uncontrollably.

The squad arrived a short while later. Mike signaled Roy and Johnny to stay in the squad. The medics saw Chet crying and immediately backed the squad out of the bay.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Chet sobbed over and over.

________________________________

Out in the squad, Johnny got on the CB. Roy shook his head.

"Chet will hear you." Roy whispered.

"Oh, yeah." Johnny realized. "I'll get Rampart on the biophone."

"Tell 'em to send an ambulance non code R." Roy instructed

____________________________

As soon as the ambulance was ordered, Roy and Johnny started to make their way inside the station. As they did, Chet ordered Mike to close and lock all the doors, even the bay door.

Chet then opened a window.

"Hey, Dummies!" Chet yelled to John and Roy. "You think I'm that stupid?! Roy, get your butt in that squad and cancel the ambulance! Johnny, you make sure the squad can't run!"

Roy and Johnny obeyed, knowing they had no other choice. Chet then directed the medics to strip to their T-Shirts and underwear and lay on their stomachs spread eagle.

Again, both men obeyed.

"Chet, why are you doing this?" Mike asked.

"Because, if they're not in uniform, the can't be Paramedics." Chet smiled.

"Wrong. They still have their licenses." Mike disagreed.

"They do?" Chet asked.

"Chet, in or out of uniform, they are Paramedics. It's the license that makes them such, not the uniform." Mike informed the Irishman. "They only wanna help."

"They aren't taking me to Rampart!" Chet declared. "You are! On the engine!"

"Okay, Chet, Okay." Mike soothed. "I'll make sure Gage and DeSoto don't touch you."

"Fine, let's go!" Chet demanded, getting on board Engine 51 and sitting in the Captain's seat. Mike then started the motor and pulled the engine out of the bay. As the engine was leaving, Roy jumped to his feet.

"DeSoto, Gage, ten hut!" Mike commanded,

Roy stopped in his tracks. Johnny got to his feet and snapped to.

____________________________

As both men stood at attention, Mike drove away with Chet in the engine.

"Do not follow us! Leave us alone!" Mike shouted to John and Roy as the engine got further away.

As soon as the engine was out of sight, Roy and Johnny quickly redressed, then went about repairing the squad. Once it was fixed, Roy and Johnny got in for the trip to Rampart. As Roy started the motor, Johnny again got on the CB.

"Johnny, the engine has a CB." Roy reminded him. "We'll notify LA later."

"Roy, why did Chet want Stoker to drive him to Rampart?" Johnny asked as he hung up the mic.

"Simple. Stoker's not a Paramedic." Roy replied. "He can't shoot Chet up with drugs like we can."

"I don't understand why Chet flipped like that." Johnny shook his head. "And why does he blame me for his test score?"

"Johnny, you didn't exactly help Chet in his studies." Roy explained.

"What am I supposed to do? Just sit and twiddle my thumbs between runs? I gotta have something to do!" John whined.

"Johnny, nobody said you couldn't have a hobby, but does it have to be one that's either noisy or something that you drag us into?" Roy asked. "Everytime you do, it gets on people's nerves."

"Roy, am I just not supposed to be curious about things?" Johnny asked. "I'm just trying to excel at something."

"Besides firefighting?" Roy asked.

"I just want to know that I'm special somehow." Johnny told Roy. "Marco has his tin, you have your pottery, why can't I have a hobby too?"

END PART 8