Copyright: January 2002 By Robin R. Neher

THIS STORY IS WRITTEN FOR PLEASURE AND IS NOT INTENDED TO INFRINGE ON ANY PREEXISTING COPYRIGHTS THAT MAY BE VIOLATED. FEEL FREE
TO SHARE WITH FRIENDS, BUT NOT FOR PROFIT. THIS STORY IS FICTIONAL, A WORK OF THE WRITER'S IMAGINATION. THE CHARACTERS AND INCIDENTS
USED IN THIS STORY ARE PURELY FICTIONAL AND ARE NOT BASED ON ANY PERSON AND/OR PERSON'S ACTUAL EXPERIENCES.

Title: Joanne's Love

Author: Robin R. Neher

E-mail: NRobin1027@aol.com

Rating: NC-17

Pairing: Joanne/Roy

Archive: Yes

Fandom: Emergency!

Summary: Joanne tries to show Roy how much he is appreciated. Will Joanne's plans backfire on her?

Content Warning: Harsh Language. Graphic M/F sex. Angst.

HANKY ALERT!!!

Joanne's Love
by Robin R. Neher

The night was quiet as Joanne DeSoto peeked in on her two sleeping kids. Assured that they were safe, she kissed each small cheek, then left the room they shared. Joanne then headed toward her own bedroom. As she dressed for bed, Joanne looked at the photo of her husband of eleven years, Roy, which sat atop her and Roy's dresser.

As she looked at the photo, her heart ached to feel Roy's loving touch as he held her in his arms. She wiped away the wistful tears as she brushed her short, dark hair in front of the mirror. It
had been four days since she'd last seen her Roy, who worked as a Firefighter/Paramedic for the Los Angeles County Fire Department out of station fifty-one. Roy, along with his partner and best friend, John Gage, were part of a crew working a huge brushfire somewhere in Box Canyon.

Joanne knew well that Roy would only come home when the fire was contained and the Chief released them and even that if the Chief released them, both men would be on recall til the danger was over. Right then, anger with the Chief took hold of Joanne. Joanne quickly calmed down by reminding herself that John and Roy were two of only a handful of Paramedics in the whole county.

You and Roy can always have time together, but there may be alot of wives in that fire area that may not know if their husbands are alive or not right now. Roy is where he should be. Out there, helping them. You've no right to be selfish. Jo chastised herself. Roy is doing what he loves, So.'s Johnny. Imagine how disappointed they'd be if they weren't called in.

Joanne put the brush down and climbed under the covers. As she drifted off to sleep, another thought crossed her mind.

You've been pretty rough on Roy lately with the honey do lists. Jo thought. Poor guy hasn't had much time or attention given to him. The kids get way more attention than he does. He comes home from 24 hours at the station to more demands at home. That's not fair to him. Roy isn't a machine and should not be treated as one. Jo, you've really gotta learn to handle more yourself. Take some of the load off Roy.

It was then that Joanne decided that she was gonna show Roy how loved and valued he was, not just for his hands, but for his big heart as well. Tomorrow, Joanne was gonna do some things she'd never even attempted before.

****

The next morning, as soon as her kids were on the bus and on their way to school. Joanne did the breakfast dishes, then dressed in some old clothes. She then headed into the DeSoto garage where the lawn mower was. After filling it with gas, she pushed the machine onto the front lawn and pulling the starter cord, she smiled as the mower roared to life.

This isn't so hard. Joanne thought as she began cutting the grass.

******

Meanwhile, at a command post miles away, Roy DeSoto stood by squad 51, drinking coffee. He was now in his fifth straight day of duty and the fatigue showed on his face as it did on that of his partner, John Gage, who stood on his left, drinking his own cup of java.

"Thinking about Jo?" Johnny asked.

"I always miss her at times like this." Roy yawned. "I haven't seen or talked to her in four days."

"I know, Pally, but Joanne understands, just as any fireman's wife does." Johnny replied.

"Does she?" Roy wondered. "When I'm gone, she has to do everything herself. Including things I should be doing. I just think of her pulling that lawn mower, cleaning those gutters, standing on that ladder, trying to wash those high windows and Johnny, it scares me outta my wits. I'm afraid she'll fall and hurt herself."

"Roy, she does what she has to. You aren't always gonna be there to do those things. Joanne's alot stronger than you give her credit for." Johnny yawned. "I'd rather have a wife like Jo than a wife like Molly."

"Yeah, but how much more will she put up with?" Roy asked. "How do I know I won't go home one day and find she took the kids and left me? I read in the paper not long ago that firefighter's divorce rates are pretty high. It said that fireman have one the highest divorce rates in the country."

"That doesn't mean it will happen to you." Johnny countered.

"Remember what Cap went through last year?" Roy reminded his friend. "The Stanley's divorce was messy and bitter. I don't want Jo and I to end up that way."

"Pally, nobody can see the future, but from what I've seen of you and Joanne, you two have a very strong marriage. Sure, you've had your highs and lows, but all marriages do." John grinned. "Roy, Joanne loves you. Why would she leave you now?"

"That's so easy to say, but there are alot of factors involved." Roy sighed. "Jo could've had any man she wanted, but she picked me. Why? What can I offer her? I'm not there alot. How do I know that other guys aren't trying to steal her away from me?"

"Roy! Roy!" Johnny cut his partner off, holding up his hands. "You have nothing to worry about. Joanne wouldn't go to another. She has the same beliefs that you do when it comes to marriage. She told me herself once that she's very committed to you."

"Yeah?" Roy smiled.

"Yeah, so stop worrying." Johnny said as the tones sounded over the squad's CB.

"Here we go again." Roy sighed as he took his place behind the wheel and Johnny went around to the passenger side. "I've lost count of how many runs we've been on."

"Yeah, me too." Johnny agreed as the sped toward where the dispatcher directed them.

 ***

A few hours later, Roy and Johnny were released back to station 51. However, they were subject to recall if things got bad again in Box Canyon. After showers and a few hours sleep, both were refreshed and ready for what ever LA dispatch threw at them. Now as they inventoried the squad, Johnny could still see the anguish in Roy's eyes.

"Roy, what happened?" John asked as he checked an air bottle.

"I found several condoms in our nightstand." Roy revealed.

"So?" Johnny prompted.

"When Joanne and I make love, I don't wear a condom." Roy replied as he checked the drug box. "She's on the pill."

"Roy, so you found condoms, big deal." John countered. "Did it ever occur to you that she bought them, intending to have you use them, but never did?"

"Come on, Johnny! Come off it!" Roy suddenly yelled. "Joanne and I haven't made love in six months! She's seeing another man! That's all there is to it!"

"Roy, will you listen to yourself?! You're jumping to conclusions!" Johnny countered.

"Am I?!" Roy demanded. "Then tell me, why do I come home to find stuff done that I was going to do?! The other day, that screen door that Jo's been after me for a month to fix?! I come home and it's fixed! Joanne doesn't know how to do that!"

"She could've bought one of those do it yourself books. Alot of women are doing that now." Johnny offered. "Roy, if you're that worried, call her!"

"I can't do that." Roy replied. "What if a man answers?"

"Roy!" Johnny insisted. "Call her!"

Roy trudged over to the pay phone and dialed his home number. After a few minutes, he hung up.

"Nobody answered." Roy told Johnny. "See? I told you! She's with another man!"

"Roy! Roy!" Johnny yelled, shaking his partner's shoulders. "Will you calm down?! Look, you're tired! You're not thinking clearly! Look, I'm gonna stand us down for awhile. I want you to go to the dorm and get some sleep, got it?!"

Roy wanted to argue, but he knew Johnny was right. The days of duty were getting to him as they were to all of them.

"Johnny, I'm sorry." Roy said, suddenly ashamed of his behavior. "I guess I'm not as rested as I thought."

"It's okay, Pally." Johnny assured his friend. "Go on, now. I'll try to get ahold of Jo."

"Thanks, Junior." Roy smiled, then went off to bed.

Once Johnny heard Roy snoring, he went to the station's base radio.

"LA, Squad 51, out of service two hours." Johnny said into the mic.

Squad 51. Sam came back.

****

Once Roy was sound asleep, Johnny went to the phone and dialed the DeSoto residence. He too got no answer and hung up. As Johnny went to the rec room to relax, the bell on the back door sounded.

Answering it, Johnny ushered Nurse Dixie McCall inside.

"Hiya, Dix. What brings you here?" Johnny grinned.

"I just came by to check on you and Roy. Where is he by the way?" Dix asked, looking around.

"In the dorm, asleep." Johnny replied. "I've stood the squad down for a couple hours."

"Good." Dix nodded. "The poor guy has been on his feet pretty much nonstop since this fire started. Between the squad and filling in on engines as needed, Roy hasn't been able to sleep."

"It's really beginning to show." Johnny admitted. "Roy thinks Joanne's having an affair."

"I was afraid this might happen." Dix shook her head. "Ever since the thing with the Stanleys last year, Roy is really afraid for his marriage."

"I guess it's understandable." Johnny mused. "It's not easy having a husband working round the clock."

"It's not easy on the married fireman either, being away from his wife and family this long." Dixie added. "There are alot of firemen who's wives have left them over this."

"It's more than just fear, Dix." Johnny told her. "Roy told me he found condoms in their nightstand."

"So?" Dix prompted.

"He says he don't wear condoms when they make love." Johnny replied.

"Oh," Dix flinched. "That's not exactly conclusive evidence though."

"No, it's not, but how else do you explain the condoms?" Johnny wondered. "Roy also says that someone's doing the jobs she asked him to do."

"Ah, Roy's just being paranoid." Dix shrugged it off. "Jo may be doing alot of things herself."

"That's what I told him." Johnny replied. "I don't think he believes it though."

"It may be that Roy thinks she can't do anything without him." Dix speculated. "Jo's a very strong woman."

"The question is, how do we get Roy to see that Jo is not having another stallion in her stable?" Johnny asked.

*****

Meanwhile, Joanne was running errands. First, to the grocery store, then to the dry cleaner's to pick up Roy's clean uniforms. After she did those things, Joanne then went to drop the uniforms at 51's. When she arrived, she was glad to find the squad in the bay as she made her way to the back parking lot, she was unaware of the trouble that awaited inside.

Go in through the back door, she encountered Roy, his expression one of pure fury. Joanne was immediately frightened.

"Where the hell have you been?!" Roy demanded, his tone dripping with anger.

"Roy,-" Joanne stammered, backing into the lockeroom.

"I call my house to find that my wife isn't there!" Roy yelled. "Where the hell were you?!"

"Roy, what's wrong?" Joanne sobbed.

"Care to explain these?!" Roy hissed, holding up the box of condoms he'd found in their nighstand a few days before. "I don't use them, so they sure ain't mine! Who is he, Jo?! Tell me! Who is he?!"

"Roy, what are you talking about?" Joanne sobbed. "There is no affair!"

"Lair!" Roy growled, slapping her across the face hard enough to cause blood to spurt from Joanne's nose.

Joanne staggered across the lockeroom, sobbing, hysterically.

"Who is he?!" Roy demanded again, advancing on his wife. "I'll kill him! Who is he, Jo?! Is it Johnny?! Mike?! Cap?! Who's been taking my place?!"

"Roy, honest! There is nobody else!" Joanne pleaded. "Please, Honey, don't you know how much I love you?!"

"I don't know what to believe anymore!" Roy yelled, pacing like a caged tiger in front of Joanne. "I go away to work and when I come home, I find condoms in my nighstand, Jobs done that I said I'd do and last but not least, men's phone numbers in my wife's address book! What am I supposed to think, Jo?! How do I know you're not out there, opening your legs to every man you meet?! I'll bet you've had men in our bed too! Our marriage bed! Well, Well, my wife, the whore!"

"STOP IT!!!" Johnny yelled. "ROY, JUST STOP IT!!!"

Roy was startled as Johnny and Dixie came into the lockeroom.

"Roy, Joanne bought those fucking rubbers for me! As a favor!" Johnny revealed as the color drained from his partner's face.

Roy sank onto the lockeroom bench as Johnny's words sank in. Joanne rose to her feet with Dixie's help.

"Roy Kenneth DeSoto, you big, stupid ox! How could you think that of me?!" Joanne sobbed. "Don't you know by now that I'm yours?! Is that how much you trust in me?!"

Roy just sat there, shaking as Johnny approached him.

"Pally, I had a date a few days ago. I knew I needed some condoms, but I was too embarrassed to be seen with them in the market, so when Jo told me she was going in for milk one day, I asked her to pick up the rubbers for me at the drugstore next door." Johnny explained. "She and I shop at the same store and on the same day. There is and never was an affair. Those numbers that you saw in her address book were me and the guy's home numbers, you know, in case there's an emergency and she can't get ahold of you if you're working another station or something."

Roy dissolved in tears at this point. Joanne went over and gathered him in her arms.

"I'm sorry!" Roy wept. "Jo, I'm so sorry!"

"Roy, I can see why you might've thought as you did, but why didn't you just come to me?" Joanne asked, gently. "I would've explained everything."

"Jo, Roy's been scared ever since Cap's divorce last year." Johnny replied. "He's afraid you're gonna do what Sue did to Hank."

"Roy, look at me." Joanne requested.

Roy kept his head down, deeply ashamed of his behavior, but Joanne lifted his chin up, making him look her in the eye.

"Roy, I adore you. I would never do to you what Sue did to Hank. Honey, we have a strong bond, you and I, and a strong marriage." Jo assured Roy. "Honey, I could never leave you. Never. You never have to worry about me with another man. I love you, Roy DeSoto, nobody else."

Joanne lovingly kissed her husband's face as Chief McConnikee arrived, demanding to know why the squad wasn't in service, but Joanne spoke first.

"Chief, these guys have been on duty for five days, nonstop. As of now, they are off duty. You can have someone else replace them." Joanne said, in a tone that left little room for argument. "They will have five days of nothing but rest and relaxation, got me?"

"Yes, Ma'am." The startled head honcho replied.

"Johnny, Roy, get your stuff and let's go." Joanne ordered in the same no-nonsense tone she'd just used with the Chief.

Both men obeyed without argument as Chief McConnikee went to call in their replacements.

***

A few minutes later, after dropping Johnny off at his apartment, Roy and Joanne arrived at their home, an hour away from station fifty-one. Joanne led Roy inside, then upstairs to their bedroom.

"Strip!" Joanne ordered.

Roy obeyed as Jo got something from the top shelf of their closet. She then approached a naked Roy and chained him hand and foot. She then produced a paddle from the box she'd just retrieved.

"I'm gonna love you, but first, you must be punished for doubting my love, for not trusting me." Jo told Roy. "I'm gonna tell you something else, if you ever hit me again, you will pay dearly, got me?!"

"Yes, Ma'am." Roy replied, politely. "It won't happen again."

Jo nodded, then turned Roy to face the wall. She then squirted Roy's ass with cold water to make the paddling all the more painful. Roy flinched as the first blow was delivered.

As the second and third blows were administered, Roy knew he deserved each and every one of them and more. He'd been an ass and he knew it. How he could've not trusted his Joanne, Roy didn't know. All he knew was that he made alot of very wrong assumptions, assumptions that could've cost him the lady he loved so.

I'll live with this for the rest of my days. Roy thought as the final, painful blow was delivered.

Joanne put the paddle down, then went around to face her husband.

"Jo, I don't know what got into me." Roy said, quietly, his head down. "I acted like a jealous kid and I'm sorry."

Joanne didn't reply as she freed Roy from his bonds. He then dressed in some clean clothes and packed an overnight bag with a couple days worth of clothes.

"Where are you going?" Jo wondered.

"Jo, I've brought shame on you with my behavior." Roy told her, always keeping his eyes to the floor. "I can't be with you knowing that. I don't deserve you."

With that, Roy went downstairs with his bag, then walked to the front door.

"Good-bye, my love." Roy whispered, kissing Joanne's cheek as she cried. "I must pay for my sins."

With that, Roy walked to his truck and getting in, left for wherever his truck took him.

****

A few hours later, Roy found himself in the camper out back of station 51. As he sat alone, all Roy could think of was Joanne and the kids. He kept seeing himself hitting Jo over and over again. Roy couldn't believe he'd actually raised his hand in anger toward her. That was what bothered him the most.

I'll never forgive myself for that. Roy thought as he sipped from a bottle of bourbon he'd purchased at a liquor store on the way there.

All Roy wanted to do just then is drink himself into oblivion and he wanted to do it in peace. The peace, however was shattered by a bang on the camper door.

"Roy! Open up!" Johnny demanded.

Joanne must've called him after I left. Roy mused.

"I'm not here!" Roy said out loud. "Go away!"

"If you're not here, then how come you're talking?" John grinned, stepping inside the camper.

"This is a one man party." Roy said, taking another swig. "I don't remember inviting you."

"That's fine, cause I invited myself." Johnny replied.

"Go away!" Roy yelled.

"I will not!" Joanne countered, entering and taking the bottle from Roy. She then poured it on the ground outside. "Roy, tell me what's wrong."

"Jo, I'm a monster!" Roy yelled. "I hit you! I could've killed you!"

"So, you hit me. I don't think you're a monster." Jo said. "There ain't one husband or wife that hasn't wanted to do just that at one time or another. Hell, there have been times where I wanted to slug Johnny, Cap and the rest, including you."

"But, I actually hit you." Roy reminded her.

"You didn't mean to. You were tired, angry and not thinking clearly." Joanne told him. "Five days with no rest will make anyone crazy. Honey, you and Johnny aren't indispensable to the department. It'll go on merrily while you two have time off. C'mon, let's go home. Johnny, thanks again."

"Anytime." Johnny grinned as he too headed for home for the second time.

***

A few minutes later, Jo eased herself down on top of a nude Roy where he lay on their bed. He smiled up at his wife, his love for her shining in his blue eyes. Jo bent to kiss his forehead as he held her close.

"Feels good." Roy grinned. "To be away from John and Chet's prank war. For the last five days, it's been who's the better prankster, how and where they're gonna get each other and mega soakings with the hoses! Don't they ever quit?"

Jo began kissing Roy in reply.

***

Before anymore could happen, Roy fell sound asleep. Joanne kissed her beloved, then climbed out of bed. She knew how exhausted Roy was, so she put her clothes back on, then quietly left the room, shutting the door as she went.

Jo kicked herself for keeping so much from her husband. As she reflected on what happened just hours before, she really could not blame him for thinking as he did.

What was he supposed to think when he saw those condoms? Jo realized. He comes home and finds stuff done that he was gonna do. What would I have thought in his place? I know I'd be wondering, just as he did. I'd probably be just as insecure as Roy was.

Going into the livingroom, Jo turned on the TV. Sitting down in Roy's favorite chair, she settled in to watch the coverage of the brushfire in Box Canyon. As she viewed the pictures on the screen, Jo again kicked herself for her earlier treatment of Chief McConnikee.

That poor man was doing his job. Jo thought. A Chief like him is probably pushed to the limit on calls like this. The whole department is spread really thin right now. It must be so hard, making sure that there are enough people on that fire, yet making sure the stations are covered too. I should apologize the next time I see him.

As Roy slept and the hours passed, Joanne began to understand how the fire department had to handle brushfires like the one she was seeing. They had to forget the normal shift schedule of 24 on/48 off. They just had to get as many people working as they could. Joanne watched as more and more people and equipment were called in from various agencies. As she watched them at work, she felt a deep since of pride in her Roy and in John too.

It was at times like these that Joanne appreciated what all firemen did. She knew well of the risks the men faced when those tones went off. She also knew that firefighting was what both Roy and Johnny loved.

I know that either one of them could never give that up. Jo realized. And I'd never ask Roy to.

Jo was startled out of her thoughts by sudden screams from her and Roy's bedroom.

"Jo, come back! Don't leave me!" Roy screamed. "Don't leave me, Jo!"

Joanne arrived in the bedroom to find Roy in the throws of a nightmare. Roy was tossing violently as he screamed. The sheets and blankets were a twisted mess.

"Jo!" Roy cried out as she held him tight.

"Roy, honey, wake up!" Joanne commanded. "Roy!"

Roy slowly opened his eyes and looked around. He stopped shaking as Jo reassured him.

"Everything's okay, Honey." Joanne lovingly reassured her husband. "I'm right here."

Roy clung to Joanne like a frightened child.

"Jo, I dreamed you left me!" Roy sobbed. "I was working the fire and all I could do was watch as you left!"

"Honey, it was just a dream." Jo whispered. "I'm right here, see?"

Roy stopped crying as his wife rocked him. He felt safe and loved in her arms. He always did feel safe from the world when she held him.

"Roy, I want you to get a shower and shave. While you do that, I'm gonna put clean sheets on the bed and fix us a nice, romantic dinner." Jo smiled. "I will light some candles, open the bottle of wine we bought last week, and we'll have a nice, romantic evening right here in our room."

"Can we have those big, thick sirloins and baked potatoes?" Roy asked.

"You bet, and chocolate mousse for dessert." Jo grinned. "But, you'll be my main course."

Roy grinned as Joanne got started on the bed and he entered the bathroom to clean up. Just the mere thought of his Jo loving him made Roy smile.

END PART 9