Title: Encounters

Fandom: Stargate-SG1

Author: Cherubino

Rating: NC-17

Pairings: Jack/Daniel

Category: A fix-it of sorts, post-Abyss

Date: May 24, 2003

Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners such as MGM, Gekko and the other lucky guys.

Notes: I genuflect to Gateroller, my friend, my Beta. Without you this story would have never happened. Thank you!

ENCOUNTERS
by Cherubino

"Why are you doing it Carter? Why have you decided to take it on yourself to take care of your invalid C.O.? You *like* being puked on? You *enjoy* sleepless nights?"

Jack stumbled out of his bedroom into the hallway and followed me to the staircase landing, yelling all the while.

"Probably because I care about you much more then I should. Sir," I throw back at him, repeating the words he said so long ago, the words I thought would have changed my life forever. "Now let's finish this conversation. You need to get back to bed."

"No, why are you *really* doing it, Carter? Huh?" Jack's face turned into a
sneer. "Are you trying to get me in your bed? Is that it?"

He is so close to me now I feel his fever, his hot breath bouncing off my
face. It's not him talking, not Jack, it's his withdrawal from that damned sarcophagus. I try to control my anger at him; I know that it is his pain talking now. I put my hands in front of me and back up slowly until I hit the wall behind the turn of the staircase. I have nowhere to go but he is pressing closer yet.

"Sir. Jack, calm down. Please."

I try to placate him but he is beyond listening. He presses me into the wall and pulls my face into a bruising kiss. He virtually rapes my mouth with his tongue and before I can think straight I raise my hand and slap him. Hard.

The sting and surprise of my action sends him reeling, stumbling backwards and teetering on the top step of the stairs. I grab the tie of his robe and pull; he trips and crashes down on the landing. I catch him before his face hits the polished hardwood floor. The robe becomes loose and his half-naked body is now pressed to mine, burning my skin through the thinness of my silk nightgown. He is trembling and his knees buckle. I can't support our weight any longer and slide down the wall to the floor, Jack folding like a rag doll.

"How. Dare. You." I bite the words out, struggling to control my emotions. "How dare you to think of me like that. How dare you to think that I would even consider asking you to betray Daniel?"

"What?" His head snaps back as if I had hit him again. "How...? What...?"

"You wanted to know why I am doing it. I am doing it because I wanted to protect you." I let out a breath and lean back, closing my eyes for a second, Jack's head resting again on my shoulder. My thoughts are back to that fateful day when the Colonel returned from Baal's planet.

* * *

"Can I get you anything, sir?" I ask.

"Water. Water would be good." His voice is just a croak and I am terrified at his listlessness.

"Sure, one glass of water is coming up!" I fake a smile and fetch him a glass of water. Leaving it on the bedside stand I bid him goodnight and leave. Force myself to leave would be more like it.

I dim the light in the room and nod to the unfamiliar nurse. I can't see her name badge but her white coat is hanging on the back of the chair and the golden bars on her shoulders tell me she is a second lieutenant. So many people have changed here over the past few months that I don't even know all the names.

What bothers me even more is that I don't know how discreet all these new people are. Remembering Daniel's painful sarcophagus withdrawal I realize that the Colonel is in for a very rough ride. Making my decision, I almost run to the still-open Commissary, grab the largest size cup of coffee they have and go back to the infirmary.

I hear the screams from the hallway; raw hoarse screams of utter terror and despair. I throw away the coffee, not even caring whether it made it to the trashcan and run into the infirmary. What I see stops me dead in my tracks - the colonel is thrashing madly and the nurse is trying to put him in restraints.

"Lieutenant, desist!" I yell as I make my way to the bed. She still struggles to lock his wrist in the leather cuff and I bodily push her away yelling again, "Lieutenant, I ordered you to stop! Move away from him, now!"

I slam the wall-mounted comm. and page Janet, fervently hoping that she is still on base, then I move back to the bed and grab the colonel, barely preventing him from falling on the floor. I hold his arms and call his name trying to penetrate the thick fog of his nightmare but he is not responding and keeps fighting me. Screams intermingle with incoherent mumblings and the only word I understand is 'Daniel'. I should have known. Damn!

The colonel is still caught in his dream so I do the only thing I can think of - I slide in next to him and pull him into my arms, heedless of the nurse or the orderlies that ran in after I sounded the base-wide. I hold him as tight as I can and I am momentarily shocked by the fact that I can subdue him so easily. My attention returns to the colonel when I feel the movements cease.

"C-carter?" He looks confused and disoriented and I give him my best 'all-is-right-with-the-world' smiles.

"Everything is all right now sir, you just had a bad dream, that's all." By the look in his eyes I judge that he is not buying it.

"And Nurse Betty here was trying to put me in restraints. Why?" His sarcasm is back but his voice lacks its usual snarkiness.

"Because she was following standard procedure," Janet's calm voice interrupts us as she walks into the infirmary. "However in the colonel's case, standard procedures do not apply. Lieutenant Willis, you are dismissed. We will discuss this incident tomorrow. " That part was addressed to the nurse who's only reply was a shaken "Yes, Ma'am."

Janet comes closer and I try to move out of the way, only to discover that the colonel apparently has no intention of letting me go. His right arm snakes behind my back and I am being held in a rather tight grip - well, as tight as he can manage right now. Janet puts her hand on my shoulder, indicating that I am not in the way. She quickly checks her patient's vitals and she does not look happy.

I notice that the colonel's face is gray and he is sweating and shaking. The withdrawal symptoms are appearing sooner then we expected. I see as he starts to swallow convulsively, trying to suppress the nausea and reaching for a trashcan with my free hand and barely managing to get it there in time, as he is violently sick. He lets go of me and I move out of the way but still hold him so he does not fall.

"I'm sorry, Carter...." he whispers, breathless from exhaustion.

"Nothing to be sorry for, sir. Happens to all of us." I offer another smile and he closes his eyes, leaning back on his pillow. However, even in his current state and with his eyes closed, O'Neill is acutely aware of his surroundings.

"Ya think next time I can retch without an audience, Doc?" he says, obviously referring to the orderlies, nurses and two SFs who hover in the doorway.

"I'll see what I can do, Colonel," Janet answers, unfazed by his sarcasm. She injects something into his IV line and he is asleep in a matter of seconds. I extricate myself from the colonel's embrace and follow Janet to her office.

"I thought you weren't going to give him any drugs." It is more a statement then a question.

"I thought that his withdrawal wouldn't be as bad as Daniel's was, after all he *was* dead when that monster used the sarcophagus on him." I see that she is tired and upset, both by the colonel's worsened condition and by the actions of her staff.

"Janet, you know better then anyone, the sedative is a temporary solution and you don't know how it will interact with the aftereffects of that damned machine." I pace her small office, shaking my head. "And I see now that we have another problem."

"What?" Janet raises her eyebrows.

"The colonel is an intensely private person, Jan. Here in the infirmary everything is public, even in the iso-rooms. He is having a hell of a time dealing with everything as it is and then there is Daniel."

"Sam, back up a little -- what does Daniel have to do with anything?" Janet interrupts me mid-rant.

I take a deep breath and try to put into coherent words the jumble of thoughts that is in my mind right now.

"Jan, remember when Daniel was addicted to the sarcophagus?" I try to start from the beginning.

"How can I forget?" Janet shakes her head. "After the colonel took that damned gun from Daniel he was here with him virtually 24/7. He shooed away the nurses and barely allowed me to tend to my patient."

"Exactly. Colonel O'Neill knew what Daniel's condition would be and he wanted to protect his lo. friend's dignity." God, I almost let it slip..

"But Daniel isn't here now to take care of his Colonel." I stop sharply and Janet smiles. "Sam, don't you think I knew? I *was* their doctor for almost six years. And I was their friend, just like you."

"Then you understand I can't let him go through it alone." Tiredly I sit on the chair and look at my friend.

"Sam, what are you suggesting?" Janet cocks her head and looks at me intently. "You know that he is going to get all the help he needs here."

"That's just it, Janet. I don't think he should *be* here. Not in his emotional state." I stand up again and return to my attempts to wear a hole in the carpet.

"Where then? The Academy? How is it better than here?" Janet is still missing the point.

"I mean not in the hospital - or the infirmary - at all." I rest the heels of my palms on the edge of the desk and look Janet in the eyes. "I want to take him home with me."

"Sam, do you understand exactly what are you planning to take on by yourself? Right now the Colonel is a very ill man and he needs round-the-clock care. How do you plan to accomplish that?" The look on my friend's face says that she is seriously considering sending me off to see McKenzie.

"I have almost a month of unused leave. I am sure SG-1 will be on stand down until the Colonel is cleared for duty. I'll just ask the General for that time to care for an ill family member. And I won't even be lying. I think General Hammond is still on base. I'll go talk to him right now." I turn on my heel and march out the door before Janet has a chance to say anything.

* * *

Jack's shivering brought me back to the here and now and I carefully maneuver us upright and steer him back into the bedroom. He goes without objection, all the anger and rage gone, listless and acquiescent once more. I help him lie down and fill the syringe with Compazine - the anti-emetic that instigated the whole argument when Jack refused to take it. That and Tylenol are the only meds that Janet insisted on him taking and still he fights me every time I give them to him. This time however I receive no argument. He hisses quietly when the needle slides under his skin and that's it. I tuck him in, turn down the light and go to my room, hoping to get a couple of hours of sleep.

I wake after what feels like an hour or so later, sensing that someone is watching me. I open my eyes and see the Colonel standing in the doorway, swaying slightly.

"What's wrong, sir?" I sit up and he moves closer and folds down to his knees. His face is pressed down against the mattress; his hand is almost touching my knee. Almost but not quite. He mumbles something but I can't discern what he is saying.

"What is it, sir? I can't hear you." My words prompt him to speak a bit louder.

"I am sorry, Carter." His face is still hidden from me. "And could we please skip the 'sir' bit? I don't feel much like 'sir' right now."

"What do you feel like, sir - Jack?" I ask, hoping beyond hope that he will talk to me.

"Like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde." He looks at me and I see a corner of his mouth twitch, almost moving up into a half-smile. Almost but not quite.

I smile at him, hiding my fatigue and ask, "So, who am I speaking to now?"

"Whoever is the good one?" he snorts.

"Okay, Dr. Jekyll it is then." I pat his hand and feel that it is icy-cold.

"Jack, you are freezing, get under the covers." When I say it his face turns into a very good impression of Teal'c when his eyebrows rise.

"You can court-marshal me for that later, just add it to the list of other transgressions. Right now the last thing I need is for you to catch a cold, so get in - I am too tired to get up and walk you back to your bedroom." I throw the blankets to the side and pull Jack up and over, then cover both of us again.

A few awkward moments of adjustments and I think we are comfortable. Bless Jack's affinity for large beds - even his guest room has a queen-sized one. I remember Daniel talking about it during his first few months back from Abydos - Jack took him in then.

"Sam?" He does not look at me; his eyes are fixed on something on the ceiling although I doubt that he can see anything in the dark.

"Yes, Jack?"

"Really, why are you doing it? I mean, I'm no picnic to be around when I'm well and now.." He sighs and looks at me, confusion clear in his eyes.

"Jack, did it ever occur to you that you are closer to me than my brother or my father? You and Daniel were my real family. I mean that I care about Teal'c and Jonas is okay but it has always been you and Daniel and now - now it's just you. I did what I would do for Dad or Mark." He is silent for a while and I add quietly. "You know, Jack, we are responsible for those we tame."

Jack's breath catches when I say that. I feel that I have accidentally stumbled on something very important.

"Daniel always said that to me. He knew I loved that book. He - he called me his Fox. His Silver Fox. God, Danny, if only you could be here!" The last sentence comes out almost as a sob and instinctively I wrap my arms around him offering what little comfort I can.

We stay motionless for a few moments and then I ask, unexpectedly even for myself. "Tell me about him, Jack."

"Why? You know Daniel as well as I do.did. "

"No, what I mean is - tell me about *your* Daniel. How do you remember him, how did it all come to be, how did you two get together?" I am probably pushing but I feel that he needs that push to start talking.

I have listened to too many of his nightmares not to realize that something happened there in Baal's fortress that had to do with Daniel. I know that Jack had never allowed himself to really grieve. He had argued that Daniel wasn't dead but for all intents and purposes to us, he was. I am sure that until Jack lets him go he will not heal. And so I push further.

"Tell me about him. Tell me about your first time."

"Ever heard of 'Don't ask - don't tell' Sam?" His voice is weak but the sarcasm is strong.

"I know." And I still ask. "But it is up to you to tell. Or not." I feel him move closer to me, seeking comfort instinctively.

"So you really want to know?" Dare I hope?

"Yes, Jack. I do."

"I was teaching him to dance."

"What?"

I feel more then hear him laugh softly. "You heard me. I was teaching him to dance." Jack pulls out of my embrace and settles comfortably against the headboard. I lean on my elbow and watch his face as he begins his story.

* * *

"We had just returned from PX9-whatever and Hammond announced a formal reception, I don't even remember what for. Danny was still staying with me then. I remember the second the General announced the party Daniel became fidgety and nervous. He refused to tell me what was wrong though, so I let it go and we went home.

Hammond gave us a couple of days leave and I had tons of work to do around the house and in the garden. I assigned Danny to the mopping and laundry detail and went outside to weed the rose beds.

A few hours later I stopped for a break. I went back to the house and the first thing I saw through the window was Daniel, in the middle of the living room, holding the mop in front of him, jerking and swaying with it. I thought he was having a seizure or something.

I ran in ready for anything but when I open the door I hear music and I realize that the convulsions are actually Daniel's attempt to tango with the mop. I tell ya, Sam, I haven't laughed that hard before or since."

I giggle and for once Jack doesn't make his 'no giggling' comment, he just shakes his head, a small smile playing on his lips. I am having difficulty controlling my sniggering but I manage somehow, I don't want Jack to stop.

"So, what happened, Jack?"

"Well, after I picked myself up from the floor I saw that Danny was pouting. He had this expression on his face - ya know, like an upset kid. His bottom lip stuck out and he looked at me from under his lashes. I was a goner then. But I held myself together and asked him what was going on and after about half an hour of begging, pleading and cajoling he finally 'fessed up. He couldn't dance and was trying to learn how for the formal party. So I offered to teach him."

I laugh and Jack gives me an indignant look. "I happen to be a good dancer, Carter."

"I know, Jack," I pat his hand. "But Daniel was a fantastic dancer. Always has been. A few months after he returned with us from Abydos I had to go to a formal wedding and had no date, so I asked Daniel to go with me. I *have* seen him in action and 'experienced the magic' myself, Jack. You were had."

At this moment I think that Jack could have beaten Teal'c in the eyebrow-raising contest, if there ever was one.

"Are you saying that he.?" Jack shakes his head, unable to formulate his suspicions.

"Yep. That's exactly what I am saying."

"That minx! That sneaky little.."

"So," I interrupt him. "What happened next?"

"Well, you know when you dance the tango, you *have* to hold your partner really close. So I did. Held him close. I took my shirt off in the yard and his was just hanging open. And he had those faded jeans on, the ones that hang low, looking like they are about to fall off. So when I started moving with him and felt him against me.it felt like I was hit with a Zat gun, ya know?"

He pauses and I see the mist in his eyes. Yeah, I know. Never mind that over the years every time I *saw* one of them in any state of undress I felt like I was zatted but to actually *feel* that.. Down, Carter! Now is not the time.

"And then what happened?" I ask him.

"C'mon, Sam, do you expect me to get technical with you?"

"No, it is not what I am asking and you know it."

"Yeah, I do. What happened next was the most amazing thing in my life; everything just felt right, good, real. Like I was just where I belong. I haven't had that feeling since.." His voice drops down to a whisper, "since before Charlie died.."

I move closer and hug him again and this time he easily nestles into my embrace. He lay silent for some time and then he says. "You know, I never thought that I was gay or even bi until Daniel."

"I don't think that what you had with Daniel had anything to do with what your preferences are, Jack." I counter his statement.

"What do you mean?" He sounds confused.

"What I mean is that you loved Daniel and the fact that he was a man did not matter. "

Jack laughs softly. "Hammond is right - you are waaaay smarter then me. And everyone else I know for that matter."

"Nah, I just pretend to be."

"Right." He laughs again, the wonderful sound I've missed so much lately. "Well, I think I should let you get some rest. I'll go to my room so you can sleep."

Jack makes a move to get up but I hold him. "It's okay, you can stay here."

"Are you sure?" He is inquiring as if he would move should I say no but he is already nestling closer and wrapping his arms around my waist.

"Good night, Jack," I confirm and relax into the pillows.

"Good night, Sam," he mumbles already half asleep.

I am dozing off when I hear "Carter?" Jack's sleepy voice comes from the vicinity of my collarbone, his breath tickling my skin as he speaks.

"Hmm?" I can't manage more then that right now.

"So you did want to get me in your bed after all?" His voice is slurred slightly under the pull of sleep but I hear him quite well. All I can manage is an indignant snort but even that was a waste of breath - he is asleep.

* * *

For the first time in ages I wake up and I am not alone, literally glorying in the feeling of a warm body wrapped around me. The curtains are partially open and I see the milky sky of the small hours of the morning, its unsure light pushing away the darkness of the night.

Slowly, I realize that the form in my arms is not Danny. My hand rests on the undeniably feminine curve of a hip and the softness pressing into my chest is definitely a breast. Before I have time to panic she turns her face away from my shoulder and I see Carter and last night's events come back to me. She is still sleeping. I am in awe of this woman, always have been and I think always will be. I meant what I said to Anise, I care about her way more then I should. But not in the way everyone seemed to think.

I brush the stray strand of hair out of her eyes and she smiles in her sleep and pushes my hand away, mumbling ''Tis too early, J'ck'. If I didn't know I would think that she and Danny really were brother and sister. He used to do the same thing, as if even in his sleep he knew it was me touching him.

My mind drifts back again, to that day in my house. God, but Daniel gave me such a scare.. And the best laugh of my life. When I finally got the story out of him and offered him a lesson he blushed and agreed. I guess now, when I know that he tricked me I could re-think that night's events but I won't. I just want to remember things as they were.

I remember laughing myself silly again; when Danny kept tripping over his own two feet. I finally gave up and stood next to him. I positioned his right arm around my waist, took his left hand with my right and put my left hand on his shoulder. My breath caught suddenly when I felt how soft his skin was and how hard the muscle was beneath it. I managed to maneuver him into the position and raising my voice over the music I said. "Remember, you have to lead, Danny!"

He looked me in the eyes and whispered. "I will, Jack, I will." To me, that whisper sounded louder then a shout. I stood frozen for a second but shook myself and started to move. I managed fine until we had to make a turn and Danny pulled me so close I was basically pressed against him. We are almost the same height and when I felt his skin against mine and his nipples touch mine I became so aroused I couldn't move any more. And then he kissed me. I have never been kissed that good before.

What happened after is still a blur to me. I remember the kissing, touching, licking, biting, exploring and mapping each other's bodies like there was no tomorrow. I hate that phrase. I hate it because for us it is true and the day did come for Danny and me when there was no tomorrow. I'd have killed myself then but I promised Danny I would never do that and I kept my word.

Hell, I am.. I didn't think I could any more, not since. Oh, Carter is waking up; I have to get out of here. I'll never be able to explain my 'sidearm' to her.

***

Something woke me up. It's morning already and Jack isn't here. I try not to panic, get up, throw on my robe and walk out in search of my errant C.O. My worry increases when I hear strangled moans coming out of his bedroom. I almost run the length of the hallway and come to a stop in front of his door. It is half-open and I am suddenly very grateful that my military habits become almost as reflexes and I never enter a room without looking in first. Thank God I did look, because what I saw was.wow. Holly Hannah. Wow.

Jack is lying on the bed on his back. He has no clothes on and he is fully erect. I have never seen anyone as beautiful as him at this moment. Daniel had a great body, strong and built but Jack is. Even now, after being so sick for so long he is all muscle and sinew, the epitome of strength. He reminds me of Michelangelo's men, the purity of lines and fluidity of form are incredible.

His eyes are closed and he is motionless for a second and then he moves and oh God, he is touching himself. I never thought I could find the sight of a man pleasuring himself so incredibly arousing. His left arm is behind his head supporting his neck, one knee bent and he is stroking the hard length of his erection. I see that he is very close, his lips parted slightly and his breath is coming out in short gasps and moans. That's the sound that scared me in the first place.

I know that I should leave, that this moment is not for anyone to see but I can't, I am rooted to the spot in the doorway, unable to tear my eyes away from the scene in front of me, praying that I remain unnoticed. I have never had voyeuristic tendencies but this has got me completely enthralled.

He is on the brink of climax, he arches off the bed, the cords in his neck stand out, I swear I can see the carotid artery pulsing rapidly under his ear and he goes over the edge with a soft cry of 'Danny!' on his lips. His eyes are closed and I see tears seeping from under the thick lashes.

I turn around and run before he sees me. I throw myself into the bathroom, lock the door and start the shower. Then I cry. I sit on the cold tiled floor and cry and cry and cry and I can't stop. My heart is breaking for the man I love. There, I said it I love him. I know he doesn't love me, not the way I would want him to but I love him and I hate the fates for being so cruel to him. How much more can he take before he breaks, before Jack O'Neill will cease to exist? Why the Powers that Be had to take Daniel of all people? Why? Doesn't Jack deserve just a bit of happiness? Oh, Daniel, God I wish you were here..

I don't know how long I was sitting there, on the bathroom floor. I fell into some kind of stupor; the only thing I was aware of was the sound of the water hitting the tiles of the shower stall in rhythmic cadence. When I hear the sound of a voice calling me, I am sure that I am hallucinating.

"Sam! Sam you have to snap out of it! Sam, please, Jack needs you. I need you." I am imagining things now. Great Samantha, way to go. Have a nervous breakdown when you are the only one Jack has left.

"Sam, please listen to me!" I feel a hand touching my hair, my face, wiping away tears that keep falling. The touch is feather-like, almost incorporeal but I feel it. Daniel? It can't be.

"I'm real, Sam. You are not hallucinating." He is crouching in front of me and I want to hug him but I can't, my arms go through and I almost fall. We laugh and he touches me again and I see now that he is not actually 'touching' me, it's more like he is sending his energy towards me. I can't really describe it but the feeling is amazing. For the moment my scientific persona wants the 'why's' and 'how's' answered but Daniel's voice interrupts my musings.

"Sam, I need your help. I want to ask you to do something for me. And for Jack." His eyes are solemn and sad and I blurt out. "Anything, Daniel, anything."

"Wait Sam, hear me out. You may feel differently once you know what I'm asking of you." I put my hand up. "I said anything and I mean it, Daniel."

He is about to tell me what it is that he needs from me when we hear Jack's voice over the noise of running water. "Carter, you in there?"

"I'll be back Sam; I don't want Jack to see me before we talk." Daniel disappears and I make a show of just getting out of the shower and open the door to Jack.

***

Jack is finally well enough so I can leave him alone and go grocery shopping. Of course, being a major has its perks and I can always summon an airman to do my bidding, more so when it's for the colonel but after weeks of my voluntary confinement with sick and cranky O'Neill, I need a break. I pop the CD into the slot and turn up the music as loud as it gets. The Scorpions have always been my favorite. The chords of Holiday fill the small space of my car as I pull out of the driveway, singing along. "Let me take you far away, you'd like a holiday.." How quaint!

"Nice music." When I hear Daniel's voice I almost lose control of the car. Thank God the road is empty and after a few seconds of mad swerving, I manage to straighten out and pull over into the road pocket.

My favorite apparition is 'sitting' in the passenger seat and at least has the decency to look sheepish. "Sorry, Sam," he mumbles and I slam my hand against the steering wheel.

"Damn it, Daniel, what are you trying to do -- kill me?" He 'touches' my hand and I feel the now familiar tingle of energy and slowly calm down. When my heart rate is back to normal I turn to him. "So, what brings you here now?"

"Well, remember that conversation we had about a week ago? When I asked for your help?" He still sounds a bit hesitant.

"Yes. You never told me what it is that you needed from me but I told you I would do anything for you and Jack. I stand by my promise. So, what is it that you need me to do?" I lean back in the seat and wait.

"I think that I need to start from the beginning, Sam. When this whole mess happened on Kelowna, Jack and I were, ah, at odds. We had a fight and didn't get a chance to talk it out before we went on that mission. Later, when I came to see him in Baal's fortress, we didn't part well either."

"So you did come to him then? " It is more of a statement then a question but I still need his confirmation. And I get it.

"Yes, I did. I wanted to help him but apparently the kind of help I offered was not what he had in mind and I couldn't give him what he asked of me." Daniel lowers his head and looks away and suddenly I wonder whether pure energy beings could cry. I keep still and silent, I sense that he needs to tell me what happened so I don't push him with questions. After a few moments he continues.

"When Jack realized that I couldn't help him escape he asked me to kill him; to help him die to, to stop the sarcophagus from reviving him. He said that he was losing himself and there wasn't much left." Daniel becomes almost transparent, his 'body' loses its shape and I see a glowing white cloud hovering over the front passenger seat of my car. Several minutes pass and the cloud morphs back into the form of Daniel.

"I need to sort things out with him, Sam. I hurt him and I need to make things right." He is desolate but I still don't understand where I come in.

"How can I help you with that, Daniel?"

"It's kinda hard to explain. Do you remember your encounter with Orlin?"

"How can I forget?" I am still jumpy over that whole thing with the NID and emeralds and my very own private mini-Stargate in the basement. Jack almost got court-martialed when he covered for me.

"So you remember how at first Orlin was incorporeal, like I am now and then he became flesh-and-blood again?"

This time I just nod. I think I have an inkling about where he is going with it.

He continues. "At this stage of my um, being, for the lack of a better word, I don't have enough power to become corporeal so I need, um, well, I'll have to.."

"Daniel," I interrupt, exasperated. "Are you trying to say that you need to 'borrow' my body so you can be with Jack?"

"Ah, yes Sam, basically that's exactly what I was trying to say. You see, I need.."

"Okay, I'll do it." Daniel seems to be oblivious to my answer in his attempt to convince me to do something I already agreed to, so he presses on as usual.

".I need to, as you put it 'be' with Jack, to give him - and myself - some sort of closure and you are the only one who can help us, so that's why I am asking. What? Did you say you'd do it?"

"Yes." I laugh inwardly -- some things never change.

"Oh. And here I was getting ready to give you the big argument and hoping that since you enjoyed watching Jack.."

I interrupt him again, this time borderline livid. "You *watched* me watching Jack? How dare you? Are you spying on me now? Answer me!"

"I would answer if you'd let me put in a word edgewise, Sam." He cocks his head and wrinkles his forehead, the mimic so familiar and endearing that all my anger is instantly forgotten. I nod and he continues. "I was watching Jack. I didn't see you at first and then - I couldn't leave and I couldn't let myself be known just yet. When I heard you crying I just had to."

I know what he means. He's always been there for me when I needed a friend.

"Daniel." I look at him and I see tears in his eyes. I didn't think he could cry but then.. Ach, I am so confused I can't think any more. "I will do anything to help you; to help Jack. Let's go." I put the car into gear and turn it around, heading back in the direction of Jack's house.

***

The house is dark except for the flickering light coming out of the living room window. We walk in and I see Jack sitting on the sheepskin rug in front of the lit fireplace. He is leaning against the brick wall, eyes closed and fingers caressing the strings of his guitar. I didn't know he played. Just like I am sure there are hundreds of things I don't know about him and I am not even talking about his Special Ops days.

He is humming a song that is terribly familiar. "Yesterday." I hear a strangled whisper and I see Daniel's face contort as if in pain. Jack heard him too and his eyes snap open and focus instantly on the spot behind me where Daniel is standing. An expression of shock is there for a moment and then I can see a mask of cold indifference slip into place.

"What are you doing here, Daniel? Come to have another go at me? Don't waste your breath. Oh, sorry, I forgot, you have no breath. Just as well. Leave, I don't want or need you here." He closes his eyes again and continues. "Sam, please ask our visitor to leave, he doesn't seem to be listening." He seems relaxed and calm but I see that the hand gripping the stock on the guitar is white-knuckled and shaking.

"Jack, please.." Daniel speaks and in horror, I see that the colonel's fingers tighten even more and the delicate neck of the guitar snaps. He flings the ruined instrument across the room into the far corner, where it lands with a thud and a moan from the broken strings.

"Damn it, Daniel, why do you keep appearing? To torture me? What the hell do you want?" Jack's mouth is twisting; his whole body begins to shake as if in the throes of withdrawal again and suddenly I think that this whole thing is a mistake.

"Jack, please, just hear me out!" Daniel steps closer to Jack but he moves swiftly away.

"Hear out what? Another diatribe about choices and responsibilities and the greater good, yadda, yadda, yadda? For crying out loud, Daniel, you've made your choice and now you have to live with that. I have to live with that. There is nothing for you to say or for me to hear." He runs his hand over his face and folds down on the couch.

I am stunned by Jack's reaction to Daniel. I feel like an intruder, I want to leave, to give them some privacy but Daniel stops me with a look. So I stay and he moves over to Jack again and sits down next to him. This time the colonel stays put.

"You are right, Jack. I did make my choice. Would you like to know why I chose to ascend, to leave behind everyone and everything I cared about? To leave you behind? Look Jack, take a look at what my life could have become if I had survived the radiation poisoning."

Daniel waves his hand and we see a picture appear in the air. It's a wheelchair, a high-backed variety that's used by quadriplegics. The person in the chair is strapped in; tubes are coming in and out of the immobile body. The face and completely baldhead are covered with scars. The mouth is partially open and a steady stream of drool is coming down and on the bib that is placed around the neck and the tracheal tube. We don't know who that person is but then the lashless lids raise and I see the familiar blue eyes look at us with infinite pain and sadness. Daniel waves his hand again and the picture disappears.

Jack is stunned. I think, no, he is definitely crying, silent tears streaming down his face. "Danny, I am so sorry." His voice is a barely audible croak. "I always thought that you chose to go with Oma Dessala because you were tempted to explore a new life, that the chance of becoming a higher being was more important to you then us. I guess I was the selfish one after all." He turns to hug Daniel and his arms fall through. He gives a bitter laugh. "Can't even hug ya, can I? Forget anything else - ah, sorry Sam."

Daniel smiles. "Actually Jack, that 'anything else' you mentioned - it just may be possible."

"Daniel, I thought you left your body behind when you ascended, apparently your brains got lost on the way too. I just tried to touch ya and fell through. How'd you suppose we do that?" Jack looks hurt and surprised simultaneously.

"Well, it would be difficult - make that impossible - but Sam has agreed to lend a hand so to speak. Actually more like her whole body." Daniel's hand goes to his nose in a subconscious attempt to push up the glasses that are no longer there, so he just taps on the tip and looks expectantly at Jack.

"Carter? Care to explain?" O'Neill cocks his head expectantly at me. O-kay, here we go.

"You see, Jack, at his current state of ascension Daniel's energy dispersment ratios are still too high. So his corporeal state if at all possible to achieve, would be highly volatile and impossible to maintain. Knowing that and taking into account his ability to interface with basically any type of matter now, we came to the likelihood of a chance to."

"Sam! Fer cryin' out loud, I'm a sick old man, have mercy and speak English!" His face is scrunched up and he is shaking his head in frustration.

"Jack," I say, crouching in front of him and taking his hand. "I agreed to allow Daniel to tap into my energy so he can become corporeal for a while. So the two of you can be together. At least for tonight."

"No!" His suddenly harsh rejection startles both Daniel and I.

"Why, Jack? Don't you." Daniel starts to argue but the colonel waves him quiet and looks directly at me.

"I could never do that to you, Samantha. I can't take advantage of you. You may feel sorry for me or for Daniel but it's not a good enough reason to do what Daniel asked you." His eyes are locked on to mine, intense and pained. I have to convince him otherwise.

"Jack, I am not doing this out of pity. I am doing it out of love. I have loved you for a long time, Jack O'Neill. I hid my feelings because of the regs and rules and all the stupid military stuff. And then when you and Daniel. I was so jealous at first I wanted to scream and fight and - and then I understood. What the two of you have is beyond jealousy, beyond rules and regulations and I was in awe of it. I swore to myself that I would protect you and fight for you and never let anything happen to you. I failed. So please, don't deny me the chance to make it right, at least for tonight."

I am crying now. I can't help it, hot tears burning my eyes and running down my face. Salty bitterness fills my mouth and drips down my chest. I didn't know I had any tears left but here I am, Major Carter, Doctor of Theoretical Astrophysics, sitting and crying up a river. Jack has never seen me cry, not like this. I am embarrassed and strangely relieved at the same time.

"Sam." His voice is barely above whisper. "Thank you." He kisses my forehead and touches my face, wiping away the wetness.

I get up and turn to Daniel. "So, what do we do now?" He smiles, walks over and stands behind me. His hands are above my head and he runs them over my body, I feel his 'touch' and the most amazing feeling envelopes me. I am light and happy and calm, my every nerve hums and sings. I feel his hands glide over my breasts and my nipples react as if he was caressing them. I gasp at a sudden onslaught of pleasure as he continues. No man has ever made me feel so incredible before and Daniel is not even touching me. The sensations grow exponentially; I can't control my moaning now. I feel as if he reached the very essence of my being, I don't know where I end and he begins any more. Hot waves of pleasure radiate through my body. God, I am about to.Yes! God, yes, that was unbelievable!

I come down from my orgasmic high to see Daniel and Jack sitting together on the couch, holding hands and looking at me. I am still standing in the middle of the room but when I try to take a step I realize that I am not really touching or feeling the floor.

"Are you okay, Sam?" Daniel smiles but there is concern in his voice.

"I guess it worked, huh? " I return the smile. "You didn't tell me it was going to be this good, Daniel."

"I needed you to release the energy somehow, so I thought to make the experience pleasant for you." He looks sheepish and I laugh. "Oh, it was believe me. Now you too enjoy yourselves while I get to play Tinkerbell." Daniel takes Jack's hand and leads him up the stairs. On the landing he turns and winks at me and in my mind I hear. "Are you going to watch?"

***

I can't believe it. I am holding Danny in my arms. Warm and solid and alive - my Danny. I know that this is only for tonight but still - it is a miracle. And I owe it to Sam. I can never thank her enough.

I touch Danny's face. My fingertips feel the high forehead, the flittering eyelids; get tickled by the thick long lashes. The contrast between the smoothness of his cheekbones and roughness of the stubble on his chin is as sharp as I remember it. How can he have stubble now anyway? Does he need to shave? Shower? These silly questions pop into my mind as I continue exploring his body - so familiar and yet so new to me all over again.

I follow my fingers with my lips. I kiss all of his face and when I find his lips. God, the taste of him! I bite on his lower lip and he opens his mouth allowing me entry. Gently, slowly I push my tongue inside, savoring the sensations. I drown in this kiss, I forget to breathe and when Daniel stops, gasping, I realize that I almost passed out.

He turns us over and now he is on top of me, the full length of his incredible body is pressed against me. He moves a little and I feel the delicious friction of our cocks. I try to take us both in hand but he bats me away.

"Patience, Jack, I am only getting started." He slithers lower and latches onto one of my nipples. Geez, he knows all the right places. He laves and suckles on the now-hard nub, then moves to the other one. I am beyond coherent thought already, panting and gasping. He moves lower and lower now, leaving trail of kisses and licks and nips on my body. He is all the way down and suddenly I buck, almost throwing him off the bed as the hot slick wetness of his mouth engulfs my aching cock. He puts his hands under my ass, lifting slightly and moving me in and out of his mouth, just the tip at first, then he takes more and more and then he deep-throats me and I come, screaming his name as I do.

I pull him up and kiss him, tasting myself on his tongue and this is the most erotic thing I have ever experienced in my life. Amazing but I am already starting to recover. "Jack, I want you, I need you." He is almost pleading, his cock hard and weeping, his hips moving involuntarily, with small minute thrusts seeking friction.

"No, Danny I want you to make love to me, I need to feel you inside me, please!" I whisper to him and he looks at me, eyes almost black with desire.

"Roll over, Jack," he commands and I obey, turning onto my stomach. He pushes my knees up and apart a little and I feel his tongue circling my entrance, pushing in and out, teasing me and driving me mad. I move trying to urge him to go deeper and as he laughs I feel the vibrations and whimper, unable to control myself. He moves away for a second, fumbling for lube and then one slick finger finds its way into my asshole, then another, opening me up for him, carefully, gently, scissoring and going deeper still. He finds the gland and I scream, hot spikes of pleasure piercing me, my skin tingles and I bear down on the invading digits wanting, needing more.

"Danny, now, please, can't take it any more, Dannnyyy!" I howl as he enters me, finally filling me, taking me, claming me as his and his alone. The burning pain gives way to pleasure, that blissful feeling of being taken, being loved. He is in to the hilt and I feel his balls touching mine as he pauses, giving me chance to adjust to his girth. And then he begins to move, in and out, slowly at first and faster and faster until he is pistoning his hips with all his power, his hands gripping my hips as he pounds into me. I miss that, God how I miss that! He hits the spot again, changing angles and I growl, all coherent thought abandoning me, all I can do is feel, fly high with the sensations he creates in me. I know he is close I still remember how his pace changes as he approaches orgasm and finally with the few hard last strokes he climaxes. His hot semen hits my prostate and I follow him over the edge without even being touched.

I think I passed out because the next thing I know Daniel touching my face gently, worry in his voice. "Jack? Jack, are you okay? Talk to me please.."

"I am okay, Danny. More then okay. You are incredible and I love you so much it hurts," I whisper still having trouble finding my voice.

"I love you too, Jack. Always have, always will. Rest now, love." I close my eyes and drift off in my lover's arms. For one night my life is good. I have my one night of happiness.

***

I didn't want to watch them. I wanted to give them their privacy. I didn't know that the exchange between Daniel and I would leave us connected in a way I never imagined possible. I can feel his feelings, his emotions. I have never known love so strong and so deep as his love for Jack. I am humbled.

They made love all night long and slept little. They knew their time was limited. And as their interlude together neared the end I felt their bereavement.

They are coming down now and I see tears in their eyes. I am crying too. Daniel comes to me and I float towards him. It is hard to maintain shape now, I feel the drain and I know that we have to switch back. I concentrate and follow Daniel's instructions. All is over in a matter of seconds. I am my old self again and Daniel is incorporeal once more. He is tired and I see that it is hard for him to even maintain his shape. He moves over to Jack and gently moves his hand across Jack's face.

"I love you. Never forget it, Jack."

"Never." Jack's face is stained with tears.

"Good bye Jack. I will see you again." Daniel's figure becomes transparent and slowly dissipates in the air.

I sit down next to Jack and put my arms around him. He hides his face in the crook of my neck and I feel his body shaking. He cries again but these are not tears of despair. These are the last tears of his grief. He knows now that Daniel will return. He lifts his head and smiles at me, the first genuine O'Neill patented smile I have seen since that horrible day on Kelowna. Jack O'Neill is back.



The End.