Title: It's Not What You Think

Author: Angel Negra

Rating: G

Pairing: Dylan/Harper

Summary: Dylan tries to get Harper to sleep.

Disclaimer: I made up the Jurgans. I don't own Andromeda or it's characters, but Dylan, Harper and Tyr can come visit anytime they want. ;)

Dylan was exhausted. He and the rest of the crew had been awake for almost two days straight. The result of a grueling negotiation with a very curious dignitary of the Jurgans who wouldn't sign the agreement to join the Commonwealth until all his questions had been answered. That, and they had been attacked by a mysterious ship. Like the last time this had happened, the ship had been blown up before Dylan could get any answers.

With the departure of the Jurgan dignitary and all current threats, Dylan had essentially ordered his crew to bed, handing over ship control to Andromeda herself. Obviously, he had received no complaints. Trance hadn't even heard him, as she had fallen asleep on her feet. Tyr had taken pity on her, opting to carry the girl, who was starting to become his friend despite his best efforts to the contrary, to her bed.

Dylan all but stumbled into his quarters, shedding pieces of uniform as soon as he passed through the doorway. "Andromeda," he called.

Andromeda materialized a hologram in her captain's quarters almostimmediately. "Yes Dylan?"

"Everyone tucked in?"

It took the ship a mere moment to check her internal sensors. "Beka and Rev are sound asleep in, Tyr just settled Trance in and is heading to his quarters now."

"Harper?"

"Harper... is working on my targeting system," she replied hesitantly.

Dylan heaved a sigh of frustration. "Well, tell him to go to bed."

There was another momentary pause as Andromeda did just that. Her nose crinkled in irritation. "He won't listen."

Dylan suppressed another sigh, "Where is he?"

"On the command deck."

Dylan gave a sharp nod, turned on his heel and stalked purposefully to the command deck. Andromeda's hologram blinked. Then she dematerialized it and focused on the bridge. She wanted to see this.

***

"Harper!"

The captain's annoyed bellow preceded his entrance on the bridge, causing Seamus Harper to drop his current tool in surprise. He stood up faster than he exited from under the consol he was working, earning him a sound smack on the back of his head from the consol itself.

"Yes boss?" asked Harper irritably, rubbing his injury.

"Bed. Now," growled Dylan.

Now as Seamus Zelazny Harper has often stated, Mrs. Harper didn't raise any idiots. So when faced with a very large grumpy captain, Harper did the smart thing. He smiled, quickly packed up his tools and followed Dylan off the command deck.

***

Dylan swallowed another yawn and without looking reached behind him and grabbed Harper by the shirt collar. He smiled internally at the other man's yelp of surprise. As if Dylan wouldn't notice the young genius lagging further and further behind in hopes of sneaking off to go back to work.

"You're not trying to sneak off on me are you?" stated Dylan calmly.

Harper gave a nervous laugh, "Hey, it's not what you think."

"Really..."

"Y-yeah. It's- the lighting! It's getting kinda tricky to see where I'm going..."

"Well then, you're in luck," replied Dylan, stopping and drawing Harper's attention to the door in front of them. "We've just reached your room."

"Lucky me," said Harper, monotone. With a final glance at Dylan, he reluctantly walked into his room.

Dylan gave him a little wave before the door whooshed shut, then leaned up against the wall to the left of the door. He settled back and began to mentally count backwards from one hundred.

He was down to twenty-three when Harper's door opened.

"Hello."

Harper nearly had a heart attack. He spun and faced Dylan, eyes wide, panting.

"Don't *do* that!"

The larger man smiled lazily, "Going somewhere?"

"It's not what you think," protested Harper, slapping on his best innocent look.

"Is that so?"

"I... forgot to wish you goodnight. Yeah, cause, you know, it's only polite. You walked me to my room and everything..." Harper trailed off, getting increasingly nervous at the captain's lack of a reaction.

Dylan looked him up and down. "What do you wear to bed?"

"*What*?!" Dylan gave him an expectant look. "Uh... well. I usually stick with my undies."

Dylan nodded and pushed the other man back into the room. Once inside he stalked over to Harper's bedroom and started hunting through the clean clothes stored in the dresser and closet.

"Hey!" protested Harper, moving to intercept. Only to let loose another loud protest and Dylan, having gotten a fresh change of clothes for the engineer, reached out and tossed Harper over his shoulder and exited his quarters.

Once out in the hallway, the captain began to make his way to his own quarters. He was too tired and too annoyed to notice the very curious Nietszchean watching them from the shadows.

***

Dylan heaved a sigh of relief as the door to his quarters slid shut behind him. Harper was pretty light, but even he could be a tough carry when he struggled like that. Dylan made his way to his bedroom, dropping his armful of Harper's clothing on a handy chair.

He came to a stop by the bed and tightened his hold on Harper's upper waist. He pulled down the bed's coverings.

Harper let out yet another indignant squawk as his captain quickly stripped off his pants and shoes. Dylan then dumped the other man onto the bed and grabbed the Hawaiian shirt and T-shirt, stripping those off as well. He took a moment to strip down to his underwear himself, then pushed Harper to the side of the bed against the wall.

Before the irate man could voice a protest, Dylan stated grumpily, "Unless the ship is under *serious* attack, I get very... irritable if woken up. I want you to shut up and go to sleep. I will tie you down if I have to. Go. To. Sleep."

Harper's eyes got very wide for a moment, then, much to Dylan's relief, he curled up with his back to Dylan and settled down. Dylan yawned and slipped into the bed, covering them both and falling asleep almost before his head hit the shared pillow.

***

Tyr walked into his own room, shedding his shirt and heading for his bed. Almost as an afterthought, he paused.

"Ship," he called quietly.

"Yes Tyr?" inquired Andromeda, adding that extra bit of perkiness she knew annoyed the warrior.

"The good captain and the boy... are they...?" he trailed off, knowing Rommie knew what he was talking about.

Andromeda grinned, "It's not what you think..." she replied, and left the Nietszchean to set about repairs. She paused for a moment to focus on Dylan's room. Both men were sound asleep. Harper had snuggled himself into Dylan's chest. For his part, Dylan had spooned around the smaller man. "... At least... not yet," amended the ship to herself.

End