Title: Lessons In Life 5: Retreats

Author/pseudonym: Lyric

Fandom: Angel

Paring: Angel/Doyle

Rating: NC-17

Status: New

Archive: Unless I already gave you permission, please ask.

Series/Sequel: Part of the 'Lessons in Life' series.

Disclaimers: Angel, Doyle, and Cordelia are merely paying me a friendly visit. They are going straight home after cake.

Notes: This part takes place a few days after 'Choices'.

Summary: Doyle takes Angel away for a bit, and Angel returns the favor. ^_^

Warnings: Finally! We're getting to the good stuff. M/M SEX, along with a little more angst.

LESSONS IN LIFE 5: RETREATS

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*sigh*

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*SIGH*

"Something on your mind, Cordelia?" Angel asked in a low tone without looking up from the paper in his hand.

"Well, since you brought it up, as a matter of fact there is!" replied Cordelia turning away from the computer, "I want to know why I'm here on a perfectly good Friday night, staring at a computer screen for so long that my eyes are in serious jeopardy of going numb."

"Because we have a case, Cordelia. You remember, those things that come before the checks?"

"And, once again, you aren't listening to me. I wasn't asking _why_ I'm here, I was asking why _I'm_ here. Me. Cordelia Chase; who should be out enjoying the LA social scene either being discovered and/or mingling with wealthy potential husbands. But, who instead is squandering her night sitting in a cramp, musty, and might I add, perpetually poorly lit office with someone who, no offense, possesses conversation skills that rate somewhere between zero and non-existent."

Angel set down the papers and rubbed a hand across his weary forehead.

"Cordelia, I know it can be grueling, but this research is necessary for the case."

"Well, where the heck is Doyle? Shouldn't he be helping us with all of this lovely research?"

Uh-oh.

"I, um, gave him thenightoff."

*pause*

"Come again?"

Wow. Who knew Cordelia could sound so menacing?

"He looked like he could use, you know, some down time."

"Down time? DOWN TIME? That's just great, Angel! I'm here for hours, researching the living crap out of this case, while I should be out launching my career. But, instead, you give Doyle -- DOYLE -- the night off so he can spend it doing what? Launching himself into bars?"

"Actually, I usually just walk in. Launching is a little extreme, and is only done when the situation warrants."

Cordelia and Angel's head snapped around toward Doyle, who was casually standing in the doorway.

"Doyle! I didn't here you come in!" she said.

"Obviously."

He looked over at Angel who had picked up the papers he had set down and appeared to be reading them intently.

"Evenin', Angel."

"Hi, Doyle" replied the vampire without lifting his eyes.

"So, Doyle, is this what you have planned for your big night off? Coming to _work_?" Cordelia asked raising an eyebrow.

Doyle let his gaze linger on Angel's bowed head before looking at her.

Cordelia, as was her wont, remained oblivious.

"I just thought I would stop in and see how the two of you were fairing."

"Great. Fine. You know, research, research, research! Listen," she began as she stood and walked around the desk towards him, "since you're here, and we can all pretty much assume that you have nowhere better to be, why don't you stay and take over for me? I'm feeling a bit tired, and I would love to, you know, turn in a little early."

She added an exaggerated yawn for effect.

His eyes flickered back to Angel for a moment.

"Sure, I'd be happy to."

"Oh, come on! I've been stuck here all night! It isn't fair -- you would?"

"Of course. I'll finish up for you. Besides, there are a few things I need to look into myself."

"Great! See you guys tomorrow!" she said rushing out of the office before Doyle had a chance to change his mind.

The two men were left alone. Doyle took a few more steps into the room, while Angel continued to concentrate on the papers in his hand.

"Interestin' reading?"

"Police report." he said without lifting his eyes.

"Ah. Is it shedding any light on the break-ins?"

"Not really. It doesn't tell me anything the store owners haven't."

"Did you check the employees records? It may be an inside job."

"I thought of that. I left a message with the owners to call me with them, but I haven't heard back from them, yet."

"I see."

Silence descended on the room once again. Doyle shifted his weight slightly, as Angel remained transfixed on the report.

"So, are you hoping that new information is going to appear on that report if you stare at it long enough?"

Angel sighed, set down the report, and stood up.

"You're right. There's nothing much we can do until we get those records, so we may as well call it a night."

On his way past Doyle, the half-demon reached out and grabbed his arm. Angel instantly shrugged out of the touch.

For a second, Doyle looked like he had been struck, before he forced a strained smile.

"What's your hurry, Angel? Do you have big plans for the rest of the night?"

"Not really. I was just looking forward to a little time to myself."

"Time to yourself, eh? Well, with Cordelia running all over town in search of that mythical 'big break', and all of the time off you have been so generously giving me, it seems like you would have your fill of that by now."

"I just need some rest. Is that such a big deal?"

"Resting. Running away. Call it what you will." he replied, unable to keep the hurt from his voice any longer.

"I'm not running away from anything."

Liar.

"Really? Then why haven't you been able to bring yourself to look me in the eye these last few days? Was what happened that night really so bad for you?" he added in a small voice.

Bad? Doyle had it all wrong. It wasn't bad for Angel at all; in fact, it was exactly the opposite. That night -- that _kiss_ -- had been one of the best things that Angel had ever experienced. It was so good, in fact, that it had managed to frighten the vampire to his very core. So, Doyle was right. Angel was running away; he was running from the happiness that Doyle could give.

He was running from what could never be his.

"I can't do this, Doyle."

"Angel, just...just wait, OK? I--I mean..."

He had never seen Doyle look as distressed as he appeared now; struggling for words. The struggle itself was an odd sort of betrayal, Because in the most selfish part of Angel's soul, he had come to expect Doyle to always have the words to make things better. He was ashamed at the irrational anger he was feeling towards Doyle, but he could not stop feeling it.

"Let's just get out of here, all right?" Doyle burst out suddenly.

"Why?"

"Just because I'm sick of being here, and I'm sick of only seeing you away from here under circumstances that somehow require ducking. Besides, there's something that I've been wanting to show you."

"Doyle--"

"Listen, I promise not to paw you without your expressed consent!" Doyle broke in with exasperation, "JeususMaryandJoseph, you're acting as if you're not a two-hundred year-old vampire who could break me in half for looking at you funny!"

Doyle managed another smile, this one a bit more successful then the last.

"I promise, your virtue will be safe."

Somehow, Angel knew that he could have made himself say no to the offer, if only he hadn't chosen that moment to finally meet Doyle's eyes. There was so much hope in the clear blue-green eyes -- a desperate hope -- that the vampire found himself unable to refuse the request. He silently nodded his consent, and Doyle broke into a huge grin.

****

They walked together for a long time, and Angel let the sights and sounds of Los Angeles wash over him. There was so much in this city, so much going on it was at times overwhelming. People came to LA for so many reasons; some seeking fame and fortune like Cordelia, others simply looking for a place to start over.

Angel had come to Los Angeles seeking penance. It was an escape for him, a chance to emerge himself in the role of a dark saviour, and in the process, leave the one person he had ever truly loved behind. He did this because she deserved the chance to move on; to find a happiness he could not give her.

Because his love proved a poison, something he had no right to give.

That path he had chosen had been forever changed with his meeting with Doyle. Suddenly, he had no longer been permitted to isolate himself from others, instead, as each day passed, he was being drawn further and further into the lives of those around him -- back into life itself.

Angel faintly noticed that the sounds of the city were becoming slightly muted, so he came out of his thoughts and took note of his surroundings. Doyle had led him into a local park that was almost deserted due to the late hour.

"You wanted to go to the park at this hour?"

"What can I say? I sometimes have this undeniable urge to see-saw."

Doyle laughed at his own joke, and it struck Angel how relieved he was to hear his friend's laughter. The last few days had been tense between them, and it had seemed like forever since he had last heard Doyle really laugh.

"I don't know, Doyle. I'm not sure it would work. Our weights are pretty uneven, you know." he responded, playing long.

"What's the matter, Angel? Don't think I could get you up?"

Well, buddy, seems you've already proven that you can do that just fine.

Angel was slightly satisfied to see a flush rise in Doyle's cheeks. It appeared he wasn't the only one victim to stray thoughts.

Suddenly, Doyle veered to the left towards a poorly lit section of the park. Angel had no idea what he was looking for, because all the vampire could see was a large cluster of trees.

A cluster of trees that Doyle promptly vanished into.

"Doyle, wait! Where are you going?"

When no answer came, Angel ducked into the dense area after his friend. Branches scratched him from all sides, but he pushed on in search of Doyle. The half-demon was not answering any of his calls, and Angel was stuck somewhere between irritation and worry. Finally, he broke through the thick trees into a clearing where Doyle was calmly waiting for him.

"What is the matter with you Doyle? Didn't anybody ever teach you that running off into the dark alone is a _bad_ thing?"

"I don't believe it! Don't tell me that the big tough vampire is afraid of the dark!"

Doyle once again erupted into laughter in sole appreciation of his own humor. This time, the laughter only fuelled Angel's annoyance. Doyle must have noticed this, because the laughter quickly died down. However, a soft smile continued to play gently at the corners of his mouth.

"If you're done with your mothering fit, why don't you take a look around?"

Mother. Hmph. He was no one's mother. He wasn't even anyone's father for that matter. Well, he sired Spike and Dru, but that had nothing really to do with anything of a paternal nature. Just because he was concerned -- although he was having a difficult time at the moment remembering why -- about the safety of a certain half-demon, didn't mean he was mothering. It's just that Doyle should know better then running off into the night. Hell, he'd seen the kind of creatures that lurked in the shadows of LA. But did that matter? Did he even stop to think of the consequences? Did he take into the consideration the fact that Angel worried when he went traipsing into the night doing god-knows-what--

Great. Next will come the question if Doyle remembered to put on clean underwear --

...

"Hello? Earth to Angel. You still there?"

"What?"

"I asked you to take a look around us, not stare at me all night long."

Doyle's soft grin was growing, and Angel couldn't decide if he wanted to smack it off him or kiss it away.

Instead, he looked around at the surrounding area. Angel had no idea what he was suppose to be looking for. Sure, the area was pretty and quiet, but he failed to see the point of all of --

Quiet. No, that wasn't the word he was looking for. It was more than that; it was actually peaceful here. The sounds of the bustling city were not only muted; they were nearly absent. The clearing he and Doyle we're standing in seemed a different world than that they had left behind on the other side of the trees.

It seemed like ages to Angel since he had been away from the city and it's never-ending erratic pulse. Only here, away from it's madness, was he able to understand the heavy weight he had shouldered since his arrival, and ducking from it's eyes felt like a physical relief.

He turned back to Doyle, and the almost mystical wonder that he was feeling grew. The half-demon was watching him with a hopeful look on his face. The only lighting that the surrounding trees allowed was the sheen from the overhead moon, and that cast a soft light on Doyle, enhancing the smooth ivory skin that Angel knew to be as soft as it looked.

"Do you like it?" Doyle asked in a soft tone.

"Yes. Very much."

Doyle's grin grew as Angel continued to stare at him; marvelling at the way that Doyle's amazing eyes seemed so much brighter when surrounded only by moonlight. The smaller man quirked an eyebrow, and then laughed softly.

"I thought you would. I've known about this place for a while now. I found it by accident, really. I was running from these guys one year when the Lakers were having a particulary hard time -- ah, well, the details aren't all that important."

Doyle reached up and ran a hand through his hair. Angel followed the movement with his eyes, fascinated by the contrast of the soft ivory fingers pushing through the thick ebony strands.

But that was Doyle, really. A wonderful contradiction that Angel had only begun to understand.

"Anyway, I come here sometimes, when I need to be away from all that mess." he gestured vaguely over Angel's shoulder towards the city. "It gets to be a bit much at times, you know? Leaving Los Angeles isn't always an option, so I come here where I can hide away for a while."

The half demon shifted his eyes and looked out into the dark trees.

"I thought you might need something like this, too. I--I just wanted to share it with you. Listen to me, I sound like a bloody Hallmark commercial."

This time, the laughter sounded hollow. It was like Doyle himself wasn't allowed to share in his own joke. The smaller man looked nervous and unsure of himself as he continued on.

"This whole idea kind of seems stupid now. Maybe we should just head back."

"It isn't stupid, Doyle."

It was such a quiet whisper, that Doyle wouldn't have been able to hear it if Angel hadn't been standing quite so close. As it was, the half-demon jumped at the sound, because he hadn't even heard Angel moving closer.

Angel was hardly aware of his own movements until he was just inches away from Doyle -- until he could feel the heat from his body like a physical caress.

Perhaps it was the quiet spell that the small clearing had cast over him, but it didn't matter, not really, as Angel lifted his hand and let his cool fingers ghost slowly down the side of Doyle's face.

"Angel, this, uh, isn't why I brought you here. I didn't -- this isn't a t-trick..."

Angel's finger slipped over his lips; effectively silencing him.

"I know, Doyle. I know."

Doyle still looked unsure of himself, and now his skin had taken on a rosy flush. Angel could hear his breathing getting heavier as the vampire continued to caress his face. Angel brought his other hand up and placed it on the back of Doyle's neck. He tilted the half-demon's head back, and covered his lips with his own.

Doyle was still tense beneath him; even more so now. But Angel did not pull back, he wasn't entirely sure if he could, until he showed Doyle how much he meant to him. The hand on Doyle's face slipped down to his waist and pulled the body against him. He had to make him understand that Angel felt and appreciated each and everything that Doyle had done for him since he entered his life, and since the vampire couldn't find the right words to express what he was feeling, he let his body show Doyle exactly what he felt.

He continued to kiss Doyle, only occasionally pulling back just enough to allow the other man a chance to draw some air, before continuing. Finally, Angel felt some of the tension leave the body in his arms. He felt Doyle's hands slide cautiously up his arms until they rested on his shoulders, and the mouth mercifully opened beneath him.

Angel wasted no time sliding his greedy tongue into Doyle's warm mouth. His tongue explored the sweet mouth thoroughly before sucking Doyle's tongue into his own mouth. Doyle made the most wonderful sigh of contentment against him.

But, Angel wasn't done quite yet.

His hand swiftly slid down to cup the wonderfully firm ass, and before the half-demon really had a chance to realize what was going on, Angel dropped to his knees bringing Doyle with him, and then pressed forward until the other man was lying slightly stunned on the cool ground beneath him.

Angel's mouth left Doyle's to explore some of the other wonderful parts of Doyle's body. He kissed, licked, and gently nipped his way down and around Doyle's jaw and neck. He paused above the pulse point of Doyle's neck, and sucked hard. He could feel the beat of Doyle's life blood beneath his tongue as it flowed through the large vein on his neck, but the need to taste every inch of Doyle's skin vanquished any temptation to drink. After adding a gentle kiss to the bruised section of skin, he continued downward. His tongue dipped into the tender hollow of Doyle's throat as Angel's hands worked at undoing the buttons of the other man's shirt. The shirt fell open and revealed the white undershirt beneath it.

To hell with it.

Angel lifted Doyle up just enough to pull both offending shirts over his head and threw them carelessly to the side.

Doyle laughed softly, and Angel smiled at his own urgency. Doyle fell back against the ground, and Angel took only enough time pull his own sweater off before once again covering Doyle's body with his own. He kissed his way across Doyle's chest while the half-demon's hands ran over his bare back. Remembering Doyle's actions from their previous encounter, he scraped a nail across Doyle's nubbed nipple. He was rewarded with a gasp, and the body under him arched in pleasure. Encouraged by the erotic response, Angel bent and sucked the same nipple into his mouth. This time, the gasp was a loud moan, and the vampire could feel nails scrape across his back.

After lavishing equal attention to the opposite nipple, he moved further down the writhing body. His tongue teasingly dipped into Doyle's navel, and he smiled at the giggle it produced.

Ticklish. Gotta remember that.

Only when his hands found Doyle's zipper, did some of the tension return to the other man's body.

"Angel! You--you don't have to. It's all right. I mean, I understand..."

The vampire slid his large palm over the jean covered hardness beneath his hands. Doyle's head fell back, and Angel watched as he bit the bottom of his kiss-bruised lip. He replaced his hand with his mouth and dropped a gentle kiss on the still-trapped erection. He lifted his head and met Doyle's wild eyes.

"It's all right, Doyle. Trust me."

The tension once again retreated and Doyle lay his head back down. Angel's chest tightened at this complete display of trust. It was both wonderful and terrifying all at once.

His hands returned to the zipper, and he pulled it down. His hands slid under the waistband of Doyle's flannel boxers, and he urged Doyle to lift up slightly as Angel pushed both his jeans and the boxers down far enough to expose the straining cock.

Angel immediately wrapped a hand around the thick length, and Doyle hissed in pleasure at the cool contact of Angel's hand. The vampire gave the hot flesh a couple of experimental pumps, and was rewarded with an exquisite answering cry. He slid his hand down to the base, and covered the remaining length with his mouth.

If he had thought Doyle warm before, the heat from the heavy cock that slid against his tongue was enough to absolutely sear him. Doyle's hands slid into his hair and gripped it tightly as he continued to suck the incredibly hot flesh in his mouth.

He threw everything he had into this act. He was so very desperate to give this to Doyle, to give as much as he dared, to the wonderful man who butted into his life and proceeded to make that life something to enjoy and look forward to, rather than something to simply endure.

Doyle released a loud shout into the surrounding quiet as he came, and Angel's eyes closed in ecstasy as he drank Doyle's release and recognized that shout as his own name.

The vampire kissed his way back up the body that was now heavily sated. He placed a lingering kiss once again over the bright love bite that had formed on Doyle's neck from his earlier ministrations, before reaching and claiming the lax mouth.

After catching his breath, Doyle's hand began to reach down towards Angel's own hardness. The vampire reached out and grabbed the hand with his own. He raised it to his mouth and placed a kiss lightly on the wrist.

"This was for you, Doyle." he whispered against the salty flesh.

Concern surfaced in Doyle's striking eyes as he regarded Angel.

"Angel..."

"We'll figure out the rest later, Doyle."

A pause, and then,

"You promise?"

He studied the beloved face so close to his own, and he knew that if there was any way for him to once again find love, it would be in these arms that now held onto him so securely.

"I promise."

End