Reversed Roles 3.1: His First Deathday

by shara_nesu

sharanesu@yahoo.co.uk

Series: Reversed Roles

Summary: This is Angel's First anniversary of his turning. He is not looking forward to it - until he gets a nice little pressie from Spike.

Website: http://www.shara-nesu.supanet.com/


Reversed Roles 3.1: His First Deathday
by shara_nesu

Spike’s POV:

It’s hard to believe a year as passed since I became a sire - Angel’s Sire. A whole year since the first time I claimed him. Wow! 365 days of re-claiming him since then. I don’t remember when I had it so good. Not even with Dru. God, I love rule number 115: sex every day! Even made a little amendment to that - twice if he misses it, thrice if he doesn‘t beg nice.

So, to celebrate our achievements, I’ve decided to give Angel a little treat. A Deathday Party. There is no way am I going to tell him this, because then he’ll start brooding and I’ll just have to punish him. Maybe I will tell him? Nah, let him wonder what I’m up to. Angel confused and worried is a joy to behold. I love how he gets this little stutter and wrinkled caveman brow when he doesn’t know what’s going on. Or when he thinks I’m up to something. I am up to no good, but what does he expect - I’m evil.

Angel also has this little problem with his age. He still counts the time when he was a vampire before. I refuse to acknowledge that time - a time when Angel wasn’t mine. He says that he’s around 300 years old all together - rubbish. He’s one and he is going to have a first Deathday. I even made a Rule. Number 16: Spike always knows best... or was it never question Spike’s wisdom? Or maybe number 16 was to always remember to buy cream... Hey, that’s something I can get him. More rulebooks, because he keeps losing them. I can’t think why?

Now, back to his Deathday. I haven’t decided what to do yet and I only have a couple of days to go. Question is, what kind of party? Whipping? Shag? Orgy? I tell ya, all I do as a Sire is think about what to do with my Childe. It’s hard work. Although it is bloody rewarding. My Childe has changed a lot in the last year. Oh, he’s still broody, but sometimes he actually smiles. He smiled at Cordelia once and she was in shock for the rest of the day. He even wears the occasional top with a bit of colour. Like very dark brown or blue, or dark with dark stripes. Okay, they aren’t bright, but I did try. Angel is more open, more approachable, and basically more free. Also with these few changes, he is more likely to get into trouble - especially breaking my rules - which is great! Well, they are specially designed for that eventuality.

Angel staggers downstairs late this evening; I think I overdid a bit during our last session. I got a little carried away with the biting. He’s wearing all black today. It reminds me of our little shopping trip a while back. As I said, it wasn’t very successful, as I had wanted it to be for some reason. Angel enjoyed it far too much. Still, I like this - black slacks, zip-up black top. It’s stretchy, tight and clings to him when he moves - I *really*like it. I continue to stare at him while he walks down the stairs into the lobby.

“What?” He looks a bit worried, always does when I sit and stare at him. I just grin. “What are you planning, Spike?”

“Hey, I’m not sneaky. Just admiring the view.” I don’t think he believes me.

Angel’s POV:

I could feel it when I came down; Spike’s up to something. He gets this innocent little boy’s look on his face which gives him away in an instant. Spike is inept at keeping secrets - almost like his plans - he just gets too impatient. Nevertheless, I have this frightening, horrid suspicion that it’s concerning my upcoming turning day. Spike always insists that I stick to his aging method. In other words, I only count the time since he turned me. Consequently, this would mean that I am coming up to my 1st Deathday. I just know he’s going to do something embarrassing. An event or gifts, after which I wouldn’t be able to show my face in public again for the next year. Why did my Sire have to be Spike?

I ask him what he’s planning, but he just laughs me off. Says he’s admiring the view. I don’t believe him. Although, seconds later he’s got me pinned to the lobby desk. His hands glide of the Lycra of my shirt.

“Nice, Childe.” He whispers before leaning up and kissing my lips. Spike hates how he has to stretch up to kiss me, because I am taller, bigger than he is. He’s always pointing out that now; he is stronger even if he doesn’t look like it. I forget my concerns and loose myself in the taste of Spike’s lips, the taste of my Sire. Our tongues caress and then fight for dominance. I groan loudly and Spike smiles. I can’t keep quiet no matter how I try when Spike touches me. His lithe body presses against mine and I wish we could be naked somewhere doing this. That thought surprises me. I never thought about sex this much before Spike‘s arrival. Now I can’t seem to get enough of Spike’s mouth, Spike’s body, and Spike’s cock.

“Good grief, get a room!” shouts Cordelia.

Spike’s POV:

I swear, if Angel was human, he’d be bright red by now. However, there is a little colour showing, but not enough for the humans to notice - such a shame. I can’t help but laugh at how he jumps at Cordelia’s voice. He then slaps my arm in retaliation, at being caught in this embarrassing (for him) position. Of course, I have to smack back. I *am* his Sire. I pull away from his heavenly mouth and kiss his scar gently. That earns me another moan and more of Cordelia’s comments.

“Spike! He’ll never work if you keep biting him!”

“He’s mine to bite, pet.”

“Yes, but he’s our employee. I don’t see you working!”

“I do work. All my time is taken up with planning my Childe’s life. I can’t help it if he’s demanding of all my time, can I?”

“Spike. Cordelia. Please, I am not a commodity here.”

I smack him again.

It’s not that I mind being at Angel Investigations, but I can’t really work for them. I do more of the freelance kinda thing. I can fight demons but I don’t know... I just feel uncomfortable around some humans. Especially that Wolfram and Hart lot - enough to scare any demon from hell, they are. Must be the chip. So I am part and parcel with Angel, therefore they give him a bigger pay packet. I especially like the part where I get Wesley to make Angel’s pay cheque out to me. I am his Sire after all, and I know where his money’s best spent. Lube, chains, toys, music, and certainly not hair gel, philosophy books and all that rubbish.

Angel pulls away from my embrace and starts getting everyone coffee. When he has vanished from sight, I pull the cheerleader into Wesley’s office.

“Spike! Get off,” she demands, as she starts pushing me away.

“Shut up, ya stupid bint. I don’t want you,” I answer back, letting go of her arm.

“Then what do you want?”

“It’s Angel’s Deathday in two days and I need to have something planned.”

Angel’s POV:

Okay, I am getting really worried here. Today has been really quiet and there have been no new cases, but Spike isn’t anywhere to be seen. That alone is enough to concern me. Typically, when I’m not busy he takes me upstairs. Not always for sex, but occasionally we do watch his TV, and then have sex. It’s getting late now and there is still no sign of Spike. Which I view as not being a good thing. When he’s on his own, you have no idea what trouble he’s brewing up.

This is killing me. I haven’t seen Spike all day. I have to know what he’s planning. I just know he’ll do something for sure to recognise my first Deathday. I wonder if I should call it a Birthday? I died, but was born a vampire. Whatever it is, I don’t like it. I’m convinced Spike will embarrass me.

It’s dusk now and everyone is going home. Still no sign of Spike, so I decide to go find him. I’m getting a little paranoid about what the hell he’s doing, I‘ve just got to find him. I start at the bottom of the hotel and work my way up. There is no sign of Spike anywhere. I’m about to give up after I’ve nearly finished searching the top floor. There is nothing until... until I hear laughing. I follow the sound of what I know to be Spike’s laugher and quietly open the door.

To my horror before me is a sight that would put hell to shame. Birthday balloons with bright coloured ‘1’s on the front, little blue bears clutching bright coloured ‘1’s, children’s cards and more ’1’s! There are streamers thrown across the room and children’s music plays softly in the background.

Oh, MY GOD! Kill me now, please. No way is Spike doing this to me. I’ll... I’ll kill him first. No!

“Ah, Angel, there you are luv,” grins Spike from the floor. He’s blowing up even more balloons. “Just getting everything ready for your big day.” That grin grows even more and I have this sudden desire to rip it off his face.

“NO!” I cry. I just can’t find the words. I think I am going to shock. “NO! NO!” I back away from the dreadful sight, my back hitting the wall. “No way in hell! In fact, send me back there!”

I look up and there are banners on the wall with `Happy 1st Deathday - Angel baby’. NO. There is fucking no way he’s doing this to me. None whatsoever. NO!

Spike’s POV:

I think Angel is having an aneurysm or something. Still, the sight of his face is worth all this effort. I’ve never seen Angel looked so scandalized and petrified at the same time. He keeps mumbling no, no, over and over. I believe my plan is working.

“Don’t you like it, Angel?” He stares at me incredulously. His mouth is a perfect ‘O’. I would love to kiss him, but it would kill the effect. I’ve really got him worried now.

“There is no way in fucking hell you’re doing this to me!”

“Angel, I don’t like you swearing.” Oh, his face. It’s a killer. I wish I had his talents at drawing - I would love to capture this moment. I haven’t even got a camera either. His face is unbelievable. I’ve never seen him act like this, not as Angelus or Angel. I think he’s about to blow a gasket.

“No!” he cries, his only warning before he comes flying towards me. We both tumble to the floor and he pins me down. His fangs snap at my throat, and his fists land hard blows. Yes, it worked perfectly. I let him land a few blows and then fight him off. Surprisingly, it’s a little difficult; his anger has made him stronger. Or is it fear? Eventually I have him on his back and I loom over him. With a little difficulty, I manage to grab hold of his hair and pull his head back, exposing his throat. My fangs almost rip his throat out in my efforts to bite him. With my superior strength, I finally manage to get a good bite, and I drink heavily from him. Angel moans, shouts, complains and tries to desperately break free. Still, the hold of the Sire is still stronger than that of the Childe. After a couple of minutes of heavy drinking, Angel’s body ultimately stills and his fighting ceases. It’s only then that I pull away from his neck.

“Angel, do you trust me?” My face changes back to its human planes, and I look into dark chocolate eyes.

“NO!” cries my Childe, weakened by blood loss, but still driven by anger.

“Angel, how old are you?”

“248!”

“Angel, how old are you?”

“Older than you.”

“Angel,” I kiss his jaw and he flinches away, refusing to look into my face. “Angel, why do you deny my siring of you?”

That question really astounds him. His eyes widen in surprise and he stares inquisitively up at me. This was my plan. I wanted to see how Angel really views me. It’s not about the children’s stuff; it’s about his denial of his turning. I refuse to admit that it hurts me. That it hurts because he doesn’t recognise the day I turned him. The day I made him mine. It’s not about that - Oh, Bloody hell. It’s all about that. It’s all about him refusing to tell the world he’s mine, and believe it too.

“I don’t,” he denies.

“Yes, you do. When you walked in this room, it wasn’t the children’s attributes that upset you.” He gives me an incredulous look. “Okay, so I went a little overboard, but it wasn’t just that. Why don’t you want to celebrate your first year as being my Childe?” Angel’s eyes soften in understanding and his face relaxes.

“I never thought of it like that. It’s just that sometimes I feel so old that it would be impossible for me to be only a year old.” He looks up at me with his beautiful face full of confusion. “I feel ancient. It is not about you, it isn’t personal. It‘s... you‘re still my Sire, no matter what.”

“Yes, but you aren’t who you were before, Angel. This is the new Angel. My Angel.” His eyes widen with comprehension. I want him to fully accept me. I want him to tell the world I am his Sire and everything that goes with it. I want it willingly. Yes, I know I am the big bad, evil and everything, but this is different. This is about the rest of our lives. I want him to remember whom he belongs to, and I want him to celebrate this first anniversary of his turning with me.

“I want you as my Sire. I have been your Childe for a year, and I wish to always be your Childe,” he whispers in submission. He moves his head forward and kisses me. His tongue is gentle in my mouth and he teases mine. He’s so beautiful when he’s kissing, with his eyes closed and all his concentration on his mouth. He’s being subservient to me, and believe me, a submissive Angel is a real turn on. I can’t ever resist him when he offers himself to me. I kiss him back harder; dominating his mouth, and he purrs gently. Finally I pull away when he pants in that oh - so - human way. It’s strange these little quirks he has. I love them.

“Sire, you aren’t really going to use these, are you?” He asks me, all quiet like, looking around at all the horrors in the room. There is real fear in his eyes.

“I haven’t decided yet. It depends on how good you’re being, and *if* you attend my party willingly.”

“Why can’t we be alone?” His begs me with a little boy’s voice. Now, I really want to shag him.

“No. I want you to recognise me in public. That means a party with all our friends.” I think I might be pushing it a little here, but I need this. I need this more that his words of love. I need his public acceptance of me. I’ve never felt this way about anyone but Angel. It makes me feel weak at times. Weak to love him so much, to want him, to desire him and to have him. Other times it makes me stronger. Love *shiver* is a strange thing. Makes us do strange things. Makes us want stranger things, too.

Angel has accepted me as Sire, in our relationship. In public, however, he hasn’t. The rest of the world doesn’t really know. He’s still Angelus with a soul to them. I want him to be Angel, Childe of Spike, and be feared for that reason alone. I want him them to know that he is *mine* totally - mind, and body and soul. Possessive, I know, but vampires are like that, okay? Don’t make me say any different. It’s just vampire nature to want your Childe’s achievements to be acclaimed to you and your own greatness. Oh, damn it. Okay, it’s love. Plain and simple. I want the world to know he’s mine and wants to be mine too. Okay!

“Okay,” Angel agrees softly, after a long pause. I don’t expect any other words from him, that admission and acceptance to do my will is enough. He has given his word and like knights of old - his word is his bond. I know he doesn’t like it, but tough. He’s just going to have to accept his Sire’s wisdom and desperate need for his recognition.

Instead of talking, I return my mouth to one of my favourite pastimes - kissing Angel. His mouth is amazing. Soft and hard, wet and smooth. His tongue entwines with mine and his teeth give little nips to my lips. I could kiss him for hours - in fact I do kiss him for hours at times. I remember watching Angel in Sunnydale kissing the slayer. They could spend all night at it. Never again will anyone taste his lips. I would love to kiss him longer, but my body desires something more. It desires to be attached to that place that has become my cock’s home - Angel’s ass. I reluctantly leave his mouth, but continue to kiss him. I kiss his face, gently kissing his eyes closed, his forehead, his cheeks and finally his chin. Angel is so damn easy these days. He moans and responds to my kisses so well, and down below he thrusts our clothed hips together. I laugh at his reactions and he growls softly back. I love the sounds he makes during foreplay, sex, and post-coital bliss. I think I made a list somewhere. Maybe I’ll make a game out of it for his friends; they can tick off all the sounds he makes in one day. Love to see Wesley’s face when I suggest that.

Since Angel is now over his shock and pretty willing, I attack his clothing in earnest. He moans as I pull off his shirt, and with desperate hands push his slacks down strong legs. I do so love ravishing him. My own clothes are ripped off in seconds, and I’m back to pressing against him. So, my next objective is to be inside my Childe. He’s a little slow from the blood loss, guess I over did it, so I take matters into my own hands. I flip him over and lift his hips. More great groans on Angel’s end, as my hands slide over firm buttocks. For a moment my hand rests over that tattoo I put there nearly a year ago. My name. I’ve been thinking about adding an arrow pointing to his anus, but I don’t think he’d agree to that. Might be a little too humorous for him. I give it a customary lick, and Angel groans as I remind him of who he belongs to. My hands part his buttocks and I press forward. Damn it.. I forgot lube, oh well, just have to go with the old faithful - my own blood. I slit my wrist with a fang, rub down my cock with a good coating, and then slick up his passage. I’d love to play with him longer but I’m desperate to be inside there. From the sounds Angel is making, he is too. I press my cock-head to his opening and press forwards. His sphincter is so damn tight, but after a little pressure he gives, opening up to my invasion.

Angel pants and gasps as I stretch him, forever moving deeper. I run my hands over flawless, firm back muscles, and with only a little resistance I am encased inside his tight perfect ass. Oh yeah, I never want to give this up - ever. All the more reason why I want everyone to know he’s mine.

I start a deep hard thrusting, pulling nearly all the way out before aggressively pushing back in. He pants as I stimulate the tight ring of muscle, then press deeper into his lower bowel. I tilt my cock and I push against that blissful nub, causing Angel to cry out. I get a good hard rhythm and Angel rocks back into my thrusts. He soon starts adding his own variation and grinds his hips in a circular motion. This gives me even more of those wonderful deep moans, little gasps and choked words. Sometimes I can’t make out a word he’s saying, but then again, when we’re like this I can’t really think about listening, or talking.

“Angel, scream for me.” I cry as I feel my orgasm building. I reach around his hips and grasp his hard, dripping length. I pump him vigorously in time with my own thrusts; I tighten my hold, adding a little pain to the pressure, and strike his pubic bone with my thrusts. I want him to come when I do, and he’d better make that soon.

“Sire!” He screams as he covers my hand with his dead seed. Then, with a few sharp thrusts, I join him in bliss. When we are milked dry, we both collapse into a heap of happy vampire flesh on the floor. It’s times like these that I love my Childe’ size and build. It’s so easy to snuggle into his back and have my head cushioned by huge shoulders. Our exertions have made his skin warm and his body comfortably relaxed. He makes the most perfect bed.

“Spike, the floor’s hard.”

No, it’s not. I don’t answer, just snuggle deeper.

“Sire?”

“Um?”

“Please don’t use these decorations.”

I laugh softly and make a pillow out of his shoulders. I have no intention of moving tonight.

“We’ll see.”

Angel’s POV:

Tomorrow is going to be my official turning day. My first Deathday, as Spike likes to call it. I don’t know whether to laugh or cry about it yet. I still feel sore from sleeping on the cold floor. Spike, however, was relaxed and rested, because he used me as a bed all night.

Sometimes I have to admit that Spike amazes me. He did last night. I never knew that my dismissal of his turning me would affect him so. Spike is not one to talk about or spread his feelings around. Well, he does like to spread his dislikes and complaints, but not his inner feelings. When he loves, it’s with his whole being, and he expects that in return. People expect me to be the one who has to have love, poetry and wooing all the time. In this instance it’s Spike. Last night was about my reassurance that he’s still my lover, my Sire and my friend. That he is more important to me than anything, missions and friends included.

It makes me laugh that everyone thinks that Angelus was the only obsessive and possessive one. He couldn’t hold a candle to Spike. I think one of his rules, in that book he gave me that I conveniently keep losing, says: Angel declares Spike’s ownership of him everyday, or Angel gets punished. Spike denies that this has anything to do with love or need. When I ask him why, he either kisses me to shut me up or screws me into the mattress. Maybe it’s because of what Angelus did to him that he needs my reassurance. I think I like it, it’s unlike any relationship I’ve had before. I need him as much as he needs me. In our desire of each other we are equal, although he doesn’t like admitting it. Love is a word that shouldn’t be spoken, according to Spike. In reality that shows how important it is to him.

I was up as soon as Spike rolled off me that morning; it was after another round of pounding me into the floor, which made me doubly sore. I didn’t really mind that other place being sore; over the last year I‘ve become accustomed to early morning ass-throbbing. After this, Spike moves back into our bed, and he sends me down to work. Thanks! When I arrive in the lobby, I almost wish I’d stayed upstairs. Everyone is grinning at me. What? Now what as Spike planned?

“So, Angel. good night?” asks Cordelia, with an innocent smile.

“Why?”

“No sudden urges to kill anyone, or maybe destroy all the balloons in the world?” She laughs. I know now she was part of Spike’s plan. Spike’s plan to shock me into noticing his hurt and anger over me not recognising his siring. Spike certainly likes making a spectacle over his issues with me. I’d be asking too much for Spike to be normal, and just tell me.

“No!” I calm myself. I’m going to have nightmares about those damn balloons and banners forever.

“So?” she asks. When I don’t answer, she impatiently adds, “what was it about?”

“What?”

She giggles again and punches my arm.

“Okay, Spike wants me to tell you that I am his Childe, the first anniversary of my turning is tomorrow, and yes, and we are having a party.”

“He wrote that down for you, didn’t he?” Now, all of them are laughing.

“No.. I...”

“Angel, we all know that when dealing with emotional stuff you are a complete disaster.” She kisses my cheek gently and hands me an iced doughnut. “Anyhow, I think you should celebrate. Ever since Spike became your Sire, you have been far less broody and even smiled once at me. I didn’t even feel the need to stake you after it.” Cordelia continues on how her life has improved since Spike turned me. Inside my pocket I screw up the notepaper with Spike’s written speech on it.

Oh, joy. The rest of the morning, all Angel Investigations has to talk about is my up coming Deathday, or whatever they want to call it. I am still not looking forward to it, but Spike needs this. For some reason he needs me to recognise and celebrate it. I would love to celebrate this on our own, but that to Spike would be impossible and completely without the desired embarrassment. I don’t know why I agreed. It’s awkward and degrading, but maybe..? Maybe I want to keep Spike happy, not because he is my Sire, but because I love him? I don’t even think I even loved Buffy enough to do this. To have a party and be the centre of attention. It just isn't me.

Spike’s POV:

This is going to be great. I’ll get drunk and kiss Angel all night. Great plan. I don’t think Angel will like it, but for some reason he’s going along with me on all this. Even took the piece of paper I wrote his speech on. With trying to explain emotional things Angel is a complete disaster. I will never know how the dark, brooding Angel ever got the slayer into his bed. Ugh! Not a nice image. I know how to get him in mine - chain him there, or bite him, that works too.

When I get downstairs it’s already late and I have arrangements to make. I decided to have the party here on Angel’s home ground. He might actually stick around for it then, or if he vanishes halfway through, I know where to find him. Brooding in the basement, or up on the roof. I know my Childe to well for him to escape me now.

“Why can’t we just go over to Caritas for the night?” asks my sulking Childe. He might have agreed to do this, but he’s not happy or comfortable about it.

“No, if we go there I can’t have banners up.”

“But it’s easier,” he whines.

I stare at him. I know he’s trying to get out of me displaying his age, but I’m not backing down. “Angel, you will have this party here or I will arrange it at McDonald’s in the kiddies’ corner.”

“Spike, no.”

He doubts me? “Cordelia! Telephone number for McDonalds!” I seize the phone and wait.

“NO!” Angel pulls the phone from my hand and puts it down again, well out of reach. “Okay! You win. We will have the party here.”

For some strange reason, I don’t see Angel for the rest of the day. Funny, seeing him uneasy and miserable isn’t making me happy. I am evil. I do like making my childe uncomfortable now and then. Who wouldn’t? He has the most beautiful range of facial expressions for each emotion. Okay, he has a couple. The puppy dog eyes. The pouting. The brooding caveman expression. If he weren’t so gorgeous, I wouldn’t push it. This time, however, I have this awful desire to make it up to him. I don’t like it. I don’t like feeling this way at all! Going to have to change this... Er... That’s it - I have a plan. Strange one for me too. It’s to make Angel feel better. Weird, this love thing. I’ll never get used to it.

Angel’s POV:

Okay, today is my Deathday. I think it should be a happy occasion, but in reality I'm scared to death. Well, if I could die from fear I would have. I wonder if I could fake a heart attack or something to get out of it? Maybe I could tell everyone I’m Angelus again? Nah, they wouldn’t believe me now. Angelus is gone, dead. Damn.

Spike gave me specific instructions - again - on how to behave and what to say. Even threatened to write post-it notes all over the hotel if I forgot. He has even chosen my clothing - red silk shirt and black leather jeans. Even they make me nervous. I remember the last time I wore leather - Angelus came back and stole my body. Hey! I wonder if Wolfram and Hart have any plans for me? Now would be a good time. This is a great time for them to interfere.. you know, anything... end of the world... .... Please?

“Angel, Daddy wants ya!”

Oh no, not again. I hate it when he uses that word. I dress in my allotted clothes and make myself presentable. I haven’t been down all day and I don’t even want to go down now. Unfortunately, I made a promise to Spike. Maybe if I’m bad I can out of this. He can punish me and I won’t be able to attend the party. No, Spike will consider the party as punishment. Oh, why me?

“ANGEL!”

I make my way slowly down the corridor, from our room to the landing. Over the banister I can see all my friends and colleagues. Spike has gone the whole nine yards. Every one I know is here. The host, AI, David Nesbit and.. oh no... he has invited Buffy! And Xander!! I can’t do this. I won’t do this!

“ANGEL! Get your ass down here, now!”

I hear a few shattered sniggers here and there. I am not moving from this spot, no matter what he does. I spy Spike coming to the top of the stairs, and his eyes seek me out. He grins when he notices I’m wearing what he has picked out.

“Angel, everyone is waiting.”

“I can’t...” I swear even my knees are shaking.

“Childe, if you don’t come down, I will tell Xander in minute detail how I shag your ass.” He grins at me and then starts walking down the stairs. “Xander, old pal!” he calls.

No way! Oh shit, he’s going to do this. He is evil! Okay, fine, you win! I’m coming. I run down the stairs to Spike’s side and he smirks at me. At times like this I wish, I really do *wish*, that I was the Sire again. I could stop him doing this. I could fight him and win. I could.. no, in the end this way is better. This way Spike is mine as much as I am his. The other way, Spike and I would just remember the past, too much. No, this is new - better.

WOW. That’s it. I suddenly realise why Spike has been so wound up about all of this. Why it’s so important to him. Because this way we can be together - forever. We can just be Angel and Spike and no one else, not Angelus or William, just us.

“SHUT UP!” Spike yells to his guests.

I take a quick look around the room and notice that none of the child-like banners are up. There is just one plain one. It says: Happy Anniversary Spike & Angel. Huh?

“Listen! If you all just shut ya gobs, I have an announcement.”

That’s Spike. He is always so polite and conscientious. There is a scattering of laughs at Spike’s kind words, and then they fall silent.

“You have all been invited here to drink my booze and eat my snacks, to celebrate my Childe’s 1st anniversary of his turning, and also my first year as a Sire. It wasn’t what I thought it would be... well in some ways it is, I shag him a hell of a lot, but other than that I couldn’t ask for a better Childe.” He leans up and kisses my cheek.

What is he on? Drugs? Is he drunk? This isn’t Spike! Maybe Wolfram and Hart have already been here?

“Now if anybody ever mentions this again, or what I’ve said here tonight, I swear I will hunt you down and kill ya - chip or no chip.” With that he pulls me down the stairs and goes in search of more whiskey.

The night was a total surprise to me. I’ve never actually been to a Birthday/Deathday party before. Not where the guests left alive, that is. It was amazing. Embarrassing, awkward, uncomfortable, I wanted to disappear into the shadows a few times, but I enjoyed it. What was even more amazing was the fact that Spike stayed with me all night. We drank together, laughed together, talked together and yes, even danced together. I thought Buffy and Cordelia - okay, everyone - would have died from shock, but to their credit no one said anything. Not even Xander!

Later there were presents, blood cake, normal cake, and chocolate. Even later than that there was drunken games and laughter. I have no idea where everyone will sleep this night. Even less of an idea on whom they are going to end up sleeping with. In fact, I don’t want to know. I only want to think about where I will be sleeping tonight - with Spike.

When he has had enough fun, food and drink, Spike drags me upstairs and undresses me. I know what’s going to come next. He will love me, deeply and with all the passion he possesses. Of course, he won’t be thinking that. He’ll think we’re fucking or having sex. Not me; I know what they are, and what Spike does to me isn’t that. Seconds later, Spike’s undresses and lies down on the bed.

For a moment I have to just stand and stare. I just don’t believe what my eyes are seeing. It‘s like a dream. Spike is handcuffing himself to the headboard. He’s naked, very aroused, and handcuffed to the bed! He just lies there waiting for me to say something. Did I mention he has secured himself to the bed? I can’t say anything. I can’t move either. I think I’m having that heart attack.

“Angel, I wanted to give you something.”

I nod, but don’t speak.

“I want to give you me. Any way you want me. Punish me, hurt me, have revenge - anything.”

Huh? “Spike.. Sire. I don’t want those things. I don’t want to hurt you, and what have I got to punish you over? If you think I regret you turning me, I don’t. I was dying and you gave me back a life. A life with you.” Finally, I get my body to move and I walk over to the bed. He’s so beautiful like this. Angelus loved him chained up, and now I can see why. I grin down at him.

“Can I have you any way I want?” I ask him.

“Yes, Childe,” he answers softly. I can see in his eyes that he has no idea what I am up to. What I am thinking. Seems he doesn't know me completely, does he?

“I want to do to you what you do to me.” Well, that’s really got him confused.

Spike’s POV:

Huh? I don’t understand a word Angel has just said to me. What does that mean - What I do to him? Is he gonna seriously hurt me? What? Now he has got me worried. I tell ya, I don’t like it one little bit. I wish I’d never thought of this. I was thinking a little roughing up or something. Something that will make me feel less guilty about this party and having forced Angel into it. I know we both enjoyed the forcing part, but.. ih, this is stupid. I still haven’t worked out why I feel so guilty yet. I wonder if Angel’s brooding is contagious? Does his blood carry it? I wonder... hey, what is he doing?

Angel leans over me and gently lowers his large body over mine. He smiles at my confusion. He’s really enjoying this. Really getting pleasure from the fact that I haven’t a clue what he’s up to. When his face is level with mine, he leans down and kisses my lips gently. Have I told you that I love his mouth? It’s like heaven. His tongue licks at my lips, teeth coming in to nip at them, then he moves closer. Angel’s tongue slips into my mouth, licking at my teeth, my palette, striving to get deeper. He moans and his tongue tries to fight with mine. I suddenly realise that this has been a little one-sided, so I join in the fight. His body presses closer to me, our cocks rubbing together sensually as our tongues duel. This is sensational! Still, haven’t worked out what he’s planning yet.

Angel’s lower body continues to rub into mine with almost painful friction. My cock feels like it’s about to explode, and he has hardly touched me. Suddenly, his mouth leaves mine and he moves lower to my throat. His tongue laps at my skin and I realise that he’s licking at the same position as his own scar. Weird. What is he..? Oh, bloody hell, he’s biting me. Not hard, but just enough to break the skin and he laps gently at the little blood.

“Angel.... Childe... What are you...?” I can hardly speak with the sensations my Childe’s causing. I want to hold him, but my arms are restrained, and I am at the mercy of his tortures. Such fucking exceptional tortures at that. Angel continues his path down my body, nipping and biting as he goes. His bites are light and he swirls the blood on my skin before lapping it up. I wonder what I taste like?

“Angel?” I moan again. He looks up at me and smiles.

“Shhhh,” he whispers. “Angel rule no 1: no talking.”

Hey! That’s my idea. I know sometimes I might forget, or get a little confused, but he can’t do that. I designed them! I created them for him. I... Oh, god. With one sudden movement Angel has engulfed by cock with his mouth. So wet, so smooth, so warm. I’ve always thought it strange how Angel’s mouth can feel warm. Maybe that’s why I won’t share him. Nobody ever is going to experience my Childe’s mouth. Rule no 140: Nobody ev.... Oh, god. I can’t think. I don’t give a damn about the bloody rules! Harder, Angel, harder! Oh, fuck... he’s killing me slowly.

Angel works my cock with all his skills, learned over the past year. Have to congratulate myself on how well I’ve taught him. Still, I think I should have forgotten the lessons in cock-teasing. Oh, yeah! New bloody rule there. He sucks, he licks, he nips, he pulls, he pushes, but why won’t he bloody swallow me? One deep hoover manoeuvre and I will be done for. Get on with it! Please!

“ANGEL!” I scream.

Angel chuckles softly and totally moves away from my cock. That’s it, I’m killing him - again. I moan and thrash on the bed, pulling on the chains that won’t let me finish the job for myself. I want to come so badly; it feels like my head’s about to give in. The pressure filling my body from cock to head is amazing. It’s so intense and it burns, screaming for denied release. Suddenly and without warning, my Childe takes my cock into the back of his throat, and I howl my release. My cries echo inside my brain while my Childe sits there grinning at me. He’s going to be in so much trouble after this!

I try and tell him that, but his fingers cover my lips. He smiles as he starts to kiss and lick his way back up my body. When we’re pressed chest to chest, he attacks my mouth again. I don’t know what new tortures he has cooking up for me - I don’t really care. It’s bloody amazing. Where the hell did he learn this? He certainly never did this as Angelus. If he had, I would never have let him go, insane or no. My release has left my body humming and pliant in his hands. It feels as though every nerve, in every part of my body is alive. I feel alive for the first time in over a century. No, let me rephrase that - the first time ever.

Angel moves in between my legs, lifting them and pushing them up and apart. My cock is already hardening again from his gentle caresses, and from the knowledge of what is to come. He has managed to be gentle with me, but he’s getting the right amount of blood in the mix, which of course I like. He nips at my skin every now and then, swirls the blood around, before licking it off. His hands run down the inside of my thighs, parting them further. I howl suddenly in protest as his fangs sink into the large vein pulsing there. He sucks at the blood for only a moment and then pulls away. The blood runs down my thigh and pools at my groin. His tongue follows the droplets further down. Down, past my cock and towards my entrance.

Angel’s hands push my legs up nearer to my chest, and rolling my hips. He has complete access to my hole and he laps at me gently. Angelus certainly never did this to me. No one has, not even Angel. I suppose he has never felt able to. I like being the aggressor during our sexual encounters. One of my greatest joys is being encompassed within that tight passage of his. I will never ever tell him that, it’s hard to admit to myself. Angel might be addicted to me, but I’m just as addicted to him. My Childe’s tongue moves lower and starts to push at the tight ring of muscle.

“Oh... fuck... Angel!” I can’t hold back the words any longer.

“Shhh,” he hushes again.

I bite my lip, trying to keep quite. I feel his tongue push past the sphincter and caress the tender flesh inside. He retreats and then presses more moisture inside of me. If the world wants to end, damn well do it now. Nobody knows this, not even Angel, but he’s the only man I’ve ever slept with. The only man to make me feel this; Angelus never did, but Angel can make my body soar. And Dru, not even she made me feel alive. Angel continues this wonderful invasion until he’s sure I’m prepared enough. His large, strong body moves back up mine, and he grins down at me as I pant and moan for him. Actions not befitting my status as Sire, but at this moment I don’t give a damn. This is a present tonight, a present to my Childe, nothing more. Still, I might let him touch me a little more like this. Even if I haven’t worked out his game yet.

Angel gets into position and quickly coats his cock with his own blood. His arms lift my legs higher and they slide over his shoulders. With a swift movement he presses forwards and fills my hole almost to the breaking point.

“Fuck!” I scream. There is a moment of burning and pain, but then ecstasy.

“Sire!” Angel cries in return.

I see the strain and pleasure on his face. He’s desperately trying to hold back his orgasm. I feel him pulsating so deep inside. He’s so big, so perfect, and with his strong body pressing me into the bed, I couldn’t wish for more. When Angel calms a little, he begins a deep, slow thrusting. It is so deep, and his aim perfectly hits my prostate with each and every thrust. His arms clutch my body to him with amazing strength. It’s like he can’t get close enough to me.

“Spike,” he whimpers.

His mouth comes closer to mine and I catch his lips. With each thrust we kiss and part, kiss and part. The movement, his mouth, the sensations he’s causing are going to drive me insane. Kiss and part, kiss and part. What the hell is he doing to me? What is this?

We must have been doing the same thrusting for nearly half an hour, and I can’t take anymore. My cock is throbbing and he hasn’t even touched it yet. I feel Angel so deep inside, and so engorged that he’s stretching me to the point of pain. Please, damn well come! Suddenly, Angel’s thrusting becomes more frantic and brutal. He presses himself even closer and pulls me to his throat. Even if he is in control, he still wants this. He still wants - needs - me to bite him.

I morph into game face and scratch my fangs down his throat. It’s amazing the way his whole body trembles and inside I feel him about to come. I don’t bite. I’m doing the teasing now. I repeat the motion and Angel becomes the desperate one.

“Sire! Please... OH!... Uh!... Please!”

I love how he can’t talk. However, I don’t think I could at this moment either. At his begging, I sink my fangs into his throat. My teeth fitting perfectly over the scarred bite mark. Mine. Angel howls and comes so deep inside that I think he’s filling my whole body. Seconds later, with his deep thrusting and his stomach rubbing hard against my cock, I join him. I don’t know how long we remained conjoined like this. I don’t want to move - ever. Finally, Angel collapses on my body and my legs slip down to the bed. I feel his softening cock slip from my hole, and there is sadness when he has parted from me.

“Angel, what the hell are you doing?” I demand, when I get my breath back. He laughs softly and gets himself comfortable on top of my body. His head turns and he rests his chin on my chest. “What?” I ask again.

“I did to you what you do to me,” he answers calmly.

“I don’t understand.”

“I made love to you, just as you made love to me every night for the last year.”

“Huh?” Huh? “I don’t..”

“Spike, you touch me like this. As deeply and as lovingly. Do you really think I would let you dominate me if you didn’t? I would fight a hell of a lot harder if you treated me like Angelus treated you. I might not like you controlling me. I might fight your suggestions, but I don’t ever want you to stop touching me. To stop making me feel like you do now.” He rolls his eyes suddenly, and before I say anything interrupts me. “I know you are going to deny all the love stuff. You’ll say you don’t, but when you make love to me you don’t need to say it, I know.” He looks smug and happy lying on my chest. Doing my trick of making a bed out of my body.

I really want to say something. Yet, I can’t find the words. For once Spike, Childe of Angelus, is make speechless by Angel, Childe of Spike. I’m literally lost for words. For all my denial of love and all my boasting of being able to control my emotions, they are just that - boasting.

“This doesn't change anything, you know. You are still my Sire. No one will see anything different between us. I don’t want you to change. Well, maybe get rid of the rulebook, but I don’t want us to change.”

My Childe amazes me. He reaches up, unclasps the handcuffs, and releases my hands from the headboard. With my brain in shock all I can do is embrace him.

“I am your Childe. I am Angel, Childe of Spike.” He kisses me gently and rests his head into my chest.

I am speechless.


The End.