Title: Double Teaming

Author: Scribe

Fandom: Austin Powers/BtVS

Pairing: Scott/Number Two/Oz

Status: Complete

Sequel/Series: The Evil Series

Archive: If I send it to you.

Disclaimer: They aren't mine.

Summary: Scott and Oz confound Fat Bastard and Mini Me, and delight Number Two.

Notes: post--To bob up and down in the saddle in rhythm with a horse's trotting gait. Different mount.

Rating: NC-17

Double Teaming
By Scribe

"There's summat strange goin' on hereabouts."

Number Two had been enjoying a peaceful bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios (favored because they did not have as much sugar as most pre-sweetended brands, but Scott still loved them, eating them by the handful as a snack). The Scottish burr behind him alerted him to danger, and he did a quit jump-and-turn, grateful that he hadn't put much milk in the bowl. *WHEN will I learn to sit with my back to the wall around here?* "Fat Bastard, I thought you had a parole meeting this morning."

Number Two backed up as Fat Bastard waddled closer. The gross Scotsman shrugged shoulders wider (and softer) than a twin mattress. "'E never showed up." *burp* *click* (That was the sound of a spat out button hitting the table.)

"Yeah, right."

Fat Bastard stuck one pudgy finger (with a VERY suspicious stain under the nail) into the bowl and stirred it. "You gonna finish this?"

Number Two turned a gentle shade of chartreuse. "Please, be my guest."

"Thanks." Fat Bastard upended the cereal box, shaking till the last few toasty ohs had heaped in the bowl, the excess pattering over the sides. He grabbed a handful, crushing down till he could swill them in the milk, then stuffed the mush into his mouth. Spraying crumbs he continued. "As Ah was sayin'--there's summat odd goin on here."

"Fat Bastard, this is the Evil Lair, not the Cleaver household. Of COURSE there's something weird going on here."

"Ah mean summat other than tha usual weird shit. Ya see, ahd just gotten back, an' I spotted tha girlie boy out by tha indoor pool." Number Two nodded. Scott had gotten quite fond of the pool since the mutated sea bass had been removed. Number Two was very, very fond of a particular pair of hot pink Speedos. Of course he was even fonder of what Scott called his 'birthday bathingsuit'. Number Two was suddenly very worried about Scott. If Fat Bastard had caught Scott skinnydipping...

"Anyway, Ah tried ta catch tha cute lil dickens for a cuddle. You know, give tha sporran a bit of a
tickle." He chuckled dirtily. "An' he was playin' coy, as usual. So Ah chased 'im down tha corridor. I thought for sure Ah had 'im cornered by tha conference room, but he turns a corner, an' then Ah hear 'im callin'. Ah turn around an' there he was behind me! Ah tell ya, Ah nearly shit meself. Ah... Wait." He stuck a hand down the back of his kilt, then examined his fingers. "Ah NEARLY shit meself. By tha time Ah got my senses back he was gone again. Now, Ah know tha wee punk is FAST, but let's be honest." He slapped his sides. The waves stopped rippling through his fat a few minutes later. "There's no way tha skinny sugarplum could slip by me in tha hall. 'Tis a puzzlement." He finished the cereal, then waddled to the refrigerator. "What?! Only two dozen eggs? When tha hell do they intend ta get some REAL grub in here?"

Dr. Evil came into the kitchen, cradling a distinctly uncomfortable looking Mini Me in his arms. "Well, Mini Me, Daddy HAS warned you about messing in Scott's room, hasn't he? You know by now that the boy has NO sense of humor."

"What happened?" Number Two asked. "And why is there a rat tail sticking out of the back of Mini Me's trousers."

"O-h-h, that's a long story. To make it short, Mini Me was going to leave Scott a little present. I think it was an opposum that had been run over about a week ago. Anyway, he wanted to surprise Scott, so he waited till he saw him leave his room, then went in to leave the present. He was just tucking it under the sheets when Scott came out of the bedroom. He didn't ppreciate the gift, and... um... Well, he sort of returned the gift in a very crude and basic manner." Mini Me squirmed, and the tail twitched. "Don't fuss, Mini Me. I told you I'd take care of it. I'm getting the tongs."

Number Two was confused now. "But I thought you said that Scott had left the room?"

"Well, that's what he thought. Maybe the little booger crawled throught the ventilation shaft to get
back into his bathroom. God knows that's a plot device that's used often enough. Ah, here we go!" Dr. Evil had located a large pair of barbecue tongs in a drawer. Mini Me was waving his arms in protest. "Oh, stop it! You want that out of there, don't you?" As they left he was saying, "You should just be glad he didn't take it out of the baggie first..."

Now thoroughly baffled, Number Two left the kitchen. He was tempted to go to Scott's room himself. Thanks to the young Evil he was no longer a virgin in the area of same sex fun. He was hopelessly infatuated, and he knew it, and was happy with it. Scott, bless his horny little heart, was very generous with his slender, pliant body.

*Still, I'd better attend to a little business before I go hunting recreation." He went to his room and got on the internet. *The terrific thing about the 'net is that I can interface with anyone and anything I need to...* he clicked the mouse, and a picture of a smiling, naked young man came up on the screen, "while looking at a nice view. Hubba, hubba, hubba.*

"Hey, man." Number Two stabbed frantically at the keyboard, trying to find the 'boss screen' shortcut that would mask what he was really looking at with something that vaguely resembled work. A hand grabbed his wrist. "No, wait! Don't shut it down, dude. Tight-Ass Twinks is one of my favorite sites."

Number Two gaped at the boy with long, dark hair who was leaning over his shoulder. "Who are you?"

"Oh, sorry." He switched his grip so that they were shaking hands. "I shoulda introduced myself. Name's Devon."

"I'm Number Two. What the hell are you doing here?"

"I came with Scott."

Number Two relaxed. He knew that some of Scott's friends considered him a dork, but this one had an open, friendly expression. He sniffed discretely. Judging by the smell of burning hemp, some of that might be attributed to herbal aids, but a lot of it seemed to be natural good nature. "Where is Scott?"

"Around. He asked me to get you to go to his room. I think he has something to tell you." Devon snickered. "Or maybe show you. Can I cruise the net while you're gone?"

"Certainly." Number Two got up to let Devon sit down. Devon managed to squeeze his ass in passing. "Um... maybe you'd like to, uh, hang out later? Talk about the net, possibly?"

Devon tipped a sly look up at him, licking his lips. "M-a-y-b-e."

Feeling a lift in his hear (and another organ), Number Two hurried off to Scott's room. He knocked and heard Scott call, "Come in!" When he entered, the room looked pretty much as usual, perhaps a bit more cluttered. Scott was lying across the bed on his stomach, reading a comic book. He was wearing a pair of clam diggers, and that was it. When Number Two came in he looked up with a wide smile. "Tooey! C'mon in and park it, man."

He sat up as Number Two shut the door and came to sit beside him. "I met your friend Devon."

"Yeah, ain't he cool? You should have seen what he did to Austin in the van." Scott scowled. "Do you know that geek bottomed for him, but he won't for me? I'm gonna do something drastic to him pretty soon to teach him a lesson. Has Dad, by any chance, designed a super sized, heat seeking, indestructable automatic dildo?" Number Two shook his head. "Damn. Why can't he ever invent anything useful or fun?"

"I don't recognize him."

"I met him last night at a tittie bar. He's half of a two man band. I was thinking we could give them a gig playing in the henchmen's lounge." He looked expectantly at Number Two.

*Scott wants it? Scott's got it, as long as it isn't illegal.* Scott batted his eyelashes at him. *Who am I fooling? If it involves trading national secrets, he's got it.* "That sounds like a good idea."

Scott hugged him. "I TOLD 'em you'd be cool about it!" He grabbed Two's head and gave him a deep kiss. "Wanna fool around?"

"How can such an intelligent boy ask such a foolish question?"

"Well, I figured it was more polite to ask than to just jump your bones."

"You're usually splendidly rude. Don't stop now."

"Get nekkid."

Number Two stood up and started stripping. Scott bounced off the bed and switched on a lamp, then shut off the overhead light. Number two blinked. The light had a strange, blue-white glow. "Black light," Scott explained. "Just thought we'd try something a little different. It WAS intriguing. It washed the color out of everything.

Scott was a symphony in black-and-white--pale skin, dark eyes and hair. He rubbed his hands together. "Which do you want this time, Tooey? Bottom or top?"

"Decisions, decisions, decisions."

Scott snickered. "Yeah, it's a bitch. 'Do I want my dick IN Scott's ass, or do I want Scott's dick in MY ass?'"

"One of the great questions of life."

"Well," he stood on tip-toe and licked Number Two's chin. "You have time to think. I gotta hit the
potty. Be right back." He went into the restroom.

Number Two quickly got undressed, checking to be sure the door was locked before sitting back on the bed. Scott was naked when he emerged from the bathroom, and Number Two felt his cock begin to twitch into life. Scott was the single most sexual being Number Two had ever met, *and he LIKES me, he really LIKES me!*

Scott loped (loped? Since when did he lope?) over and sat on Number Two's lap, facing him and straddling his legs. "Hiya!" He bumped his groin against Two's belly, his rising cock prodding. "How ya doin?"

"Wonderfully." Two wrapped his arms around Scott as the boy began to post, his cock gently rubbing against Two's abdomen. "Scott, have you been working out? I think you feel a little heavier."

"Not really." He pushed till Two fell back flat on the bed, and lay on top of him, both of them dangling their legs off the side of the bed. Now Scott began to rub back and forth. "So, have ya made up your mind yet?" He ground his arousal against Number Two's. "I could put this to good use."

"Ooo," Number Two sighed. "That sounds like a wonderful idea."

"Just a second." Scott hopped up, leaving a beginning-to-be-frustrated evil assistant with a
wavering erection. He trotted into the bathroom, calling, "Gotta do something."

"Well, will you..." *slam* *oof!* "I was going to say hurry up." Scott, back on top of him, wiggled. "What did you need to do?"

"This." Scott took hold of Number Two's hand, pulled it up and back, and settled the older man's fingers against his crack, then pushed.

Number Two was perfectly happy to play sticky fingers. He was a little surprised, though, when two fingers sank easily into a slick, already loosened hole. "Scott, how...? You didn't have time to..." Scott humped back, taking his fingers deeper, and Number Two quit worrying about time frames. He probed and stroked, finding Scott's prostate. Sone the boy was wiggling and cooing. "Oh, Scott," Number Two gasped. "I want to fuck you."

Scott stopped moving, Two's fingers sunk deep in his ass, and braced himself over Two, gazing down at him teasingly. "So, you DON'T want ME to fuck YOU?"

"Yes, I want that."

"But you want to fuck me?"

"Yes!" Number Two growled in frustration. "But I can't do both at the same time!"

He heard a door creak open, and Scott's grin became maniacal. "Oh, yeah?"

"I thought I looked the door." *squeak!* The squeak occured when Scott suddenly peaked over Scott's shoulder, smiling down at him.

"Ya did," assured Scott One. "That was the bathroom door."

Scott Two winked. "Hiya."

"I... I..." Number Two swallowed. "Scott, you've been in the cloning lab, haven't you? How on earth did you manage to overcome the size problem?"

Scott Two, looking a little hurt, looked down at his cock. "No one's ever had a problem with my size before."

"No, no! I mean the shrinkage when the DNA is replicated. It always..."

Scott One kissed Number Two thoroughly, shutting him up. "He isn't a clone, dude. He's a totally rad muscician from California. Remember I told you about the band? He's Oz, guitar."

Number Two stared Scott up and down. "The resemblence is remarkable. It's uncanny."

Oz shrugged. "You have no idea." He flopped on the bed beside Number Two, reached over, and started playing with his nipples. "So, I'm not claiming to be a substitute for the Mighty Scott, but I can keep up with him pretty good, and I've always wanted to be part of fulfilling someone's fantasy. Whadaya say?"

Scott was wiggling again, and he'd reached under to grip Number Two's ass cheeks. Now he rolled on his side, bringing Two with him. He spread Two's cheeks apart, and Number Two felt a greased finger worm it's way up inside him. It felt familiar, but since Scott presently had a double handful of his ass it had to be Oz. Two found that he was perfectly all right with this. "I say fuck yes."

"Or rather," Oz slipped in a second finger, wiggling them apart, much to Number Two's delight. "Yes. Fuck."

There was a great deal of squishing and pumping for a few moments. Then Scott pulled Two's fingers out of his butt. "I know it's bad etiquette, but I'm sure you won't mind if I turn my back on you." He turned on his side, faced away from the others, and backed up against Number Two. "Oz, he's ready on this end."

"Let me see." *probe* *whimper* "Ooo, yep." Ox grabbed Number Two's hips and edged up behind him. "Ready to be double-dipped, hot stuff?"

Scott squawked. "DAMN, Tooey, give a guy a little warning, wouldya?!"

Two's voice was breathless. "Sorry." *squeeze* "Ooo, no I'm not."

"Get 'im, Oz!"

"Check."

*squawk* "Scott, your friend is... uh..."

"Yeah, I found out last night after we got home. I'm good, ain't I?"

*pantpant* Two's cock was encased in a tight, moist grip--one that rippled and squeezed. At the same time his ass was filled with a thick staff of hot flesh that slid and probed, rubbing deliciously over his prostate. It was a situation he had never even dared to imagine.

"T-o-o-e-y?" Scott purred. "You're awful still for someone in the middle position of a triple fuck."

"I'm afraid this is a dream, and I'll wake up if I move."

"Crap. Well, Oz, I guess we're gonna have to convince him. I don't mind working for my splash." He wiggled, squirming back to impale himself even deeper just as Oz thrust forward.

Oz growled happily. He didn't have a problem with older guys. Hell, he'd had some fine times with
Giles. But this... this had to be the wildest screw he'd ever had, in human OR wolf form. He felt like he was fucking both Number Two AND Scott at the same time. Amazing.

Things got very active, and very hot. The chorus of grunting, moaning, and growling would have had a porno movie sound man slavering. If he put it behind an orgy scene featuring Pee Wee Herman lookalikes, he'd still be able to get a rise out of the viewers.

Number Two, not too surprisingly, was the first to go. The combination of Scott's hot grip and Oz's just as hot pumping sent him over the edge. The clenching of his ass did it for Oz, who filled him with a triumphant howl and a sharp nip to the shoulder that seemed to cause Oz a hell of a lot more distress than it did Number Two (though he calmed back down when he saw that he hadn't broken skin.) Number Two was still able to think enough to reach around and stroke Scott's quivering prick till he gushed with a pleased yelp.

They lay there, tangled together and panting. Finally Oz gasped, "You have the BEST sleepovers, Scott."

Scott giggled as Number Two nuzzled his damp neck. "We're gonna have to keep track while you and Devon are here, and see how many combinations we can come up with. Oh..." he glanced back at Number Two. "You've met Devon, huh?" Number Two nodded. "You like him?" Number Two grinned. "G-o-o-d."

Oz had pulled free. Now he crawled crossways over Scott and Number Two, making himself comfortable on their bodies. "So, what was it like, Two? Getting screwed by two Scott's at once?"

Scott raised an eyebrow at Oz. "Curious?"

Oz shrugged. "Hell yeah, but it's not like I have any chance of finding out personally, is it?"

"O-h, I don't k-n-o-w. They say you can find almost anyone on the internet."

"That means?"

Scott smiled slowly. "You remember how I called you Duane the first time I saw you?"

END