Fic: Stigmatized

by Catsclaw

Pairing: Bruce/Dick
:
Rating: PG-13/mild R

Disclaimer: *Checks off her fingers* characters - not mine, song - not mine, plot - oh mine! YAY I own something! Song by the Calling.

Summary: Song fic, Bruce figures out what to do.

Dedication: To Nazgirl, Silvertip, Elentari, Amiolia, Elwen, Mrs Skywalker and any one else who has had to put up with my 'religion rants.'

A/N: Contains a religious issue, or rather my issue with religion or one of them. I used to be such a strict religious believer and now I'm not. This fic (or some of it) is my way of letting off steam.

Author's Page: http://www.geocities.com/catclawisil

Archive: Yes

Feedback: Please, catclawisil@yahoo.com


Stigmatized
by Catslaw

It wasn't often that he indulged in listening to songs that he could relate to but this one really seemed to fit. He'd first heard it at work. One of his younger employees had been listening to it. It had caught his attention from the first line. 'If I give up on you, I give up on me.'

That was exactly how he felt about Dick. His ward was so infuriating at times, he just wouldn't listen, and that often left him wanting to give up. He didn't. He knew that if he did, he would feel empty. All those years of being alone at night. Then suddenly to have a companion. If he gave up on Robin, it would be like giving up on Batman. They were a team.

He listened as the first strains of music filled the room and thought again about his ward. He had felt drawn to Dick when he first became Robin. Then as Dick grew up, he found himself physically attracted to him. He fell in love with him.

At the time he had been horrified to learn that he was in love with a man. He was a deeply religious man. Homosexuality was wrong, it was disgusting in the eyes of God. It was un-natural.

Thinking back to that he wondered what could be more natural than love? He'd had a few arguments with Lex on the subject when he has found out that the other man was Bisexual. Many interesting points had been raised. Lex had said 'Surely Jesus loved everyone. That included men you know.' His response had been, 'Yes, but not carnally.' Also God must have known that men would do whatever brought them pleasure. So if being gay was a definite NO, then why give them a prostate?

Thankfully Lex had known that he was really questioning his own religion, so their friendship had remained in tact.

After thinking about the matter, he'd turned his back on his religion, believing God to be wrong. 'Even God himself and the faith I knew, it shouldn't hold me back. Shouldn't keep me from you.'

Before denouncing his religion, he had turned to it for help. Not that it had helped. Romans 1:27, Leviticus 18:22. Both said it was wrong, don't do it. Yeah, that had helped a lot! And he'd prayed for understanding. 'Every lonely night, that I sit and pray.' But he had not understood. As far as he could see the only reason it was wrong was because *he* didn't *design* us like *that*. And also according to Romans, men had earned themselves 'full recompense for their error.' Which basically meant death and disease. Such a *kind* *loving* and *forgiving* God!

He decided to leave this train of thought, as it was really starting to piss him off. He again thought of Dick and the innocent touches that they had shared. Of course he had thought little of it when the boy was younger. But when the boy became a man things changed. He craved the intimate little things. Such as him grabbing his hand and dragging him off down to the Batcave whenever he'd had a bad day. 'Tease me by holding out your hand.' He probably didn't realise what he was doing to his guardian, or that he thought of him that way.

He had always been very protective of Dick. He loved him - always had though in different ways - and everyone that he had ever allowed himself to love had been taken away from him, with the exception of Alfred. Unfortunately Dick had always mistaken his protectiveness with distrust. And after the incident when the Joker had almost killed Dick they had argued Bruce had wanted Dick to hang up his cape for good - to protect him.

And Dick had left and gone to Bludhaven, where he had taken on the persona of Nightwing. Bruce knew that all the members of the police force in Bludhaven were not to be trusted, but Dick believed that he could make a difference. And Bruce had trusted that he would do all that he could.

It seemed, however, that he was wrong. It had been on the news, Nightwing had been terrorizing Bludhaven and was now in Gotham. Batman was needed to stop him. After being so close, fighting as a team, Dick had joined the opposite team. 'We live our lives on different sides.'

He glanced out of the window, night had fallen, time for the big, bad Bat to make an appearance. He turned the music off and went down into the 'Cave to suit up. After transforming into Batman, he jumped into the Batmobil and headed towards the heart of Gotham.

He had barely made it there when the Batsignal went up into the sky. He flicked Commissioner Gordon up onto the screen,

"What's going on Jim?"

"The bank on 5th, it's a hostage situation Batman." He nodded grimly and turned the screen off.

He reached the bank and made his usual melodramatic entrance - he really wasn't in the mood for this tonight - and whatever he was planning to do was lost when he saw who was the one organising the whole thing. In the centre was Nightwing.

Sensing Batman's shock, Nightwing made the first move, he kicked the other man in the chest with enough force to send him stumbling backwards. Bruce leapt forward and caught his ex partner in the underside of his chin with almost lethal strength.

They both knew each other's fighting style making it hard for the other to land a hit, wherever Batman went, Nightwing blocked, wherever Nightwing went Batman blocked.

A scream outside caught Batman's attention and Nightwing used the distraction to deliver a violent kick to Batman's solar plexus causing him to fly backwards. Nightwing leapt up to the window Batman had made his entrance through and disappeared through it.

He got up and unlocked the doors to the bank, letting the people out before following Nightwing.

Several hours later he returned to the Batcave. He hadn’t seen Nightwing again that night. Alfred was there waiting for him, and next to him was Tim.

“Welcome home Master Bruce.”

“Hi Bruce, I think there is something you should see.” Tim pushed a button on the keyboard.

A recording of one of the night’s news programmes flashed up onto the screen. It showed him and Nightwing fighting. He was about to tell Tim to turn it off, when he saw the light reflect off something by Nightwing’s ear.

He froze the picture and zoomed in on the thing. It was a card like those used by the Mad Hatter. So that was why Dick had changed sides. Relief swept through him. How could he have ever doubted him, he *loved* him. And now he had to save him.

Nightwing didn’t show up in Gotham or Bludhaven for the next few nights. Then just when Bruce was beginning to worry that he wouldn’t be able to save Dick the Batsignal went up into the Gotham sky.

Bruce went through the usual ritual of asking the Commissioner what was wrong and where. He was told it was the jewellers on 9th Street and that it was a break in, as yet they didn’t know who.

He reached the jewellers in record time – even for Batman. Nightwing had his back to the door and was busily empting the display cases.

He decided to use the element of surprise to his advantage and began to creep up behind his former partner. Just as he reached for the card behind his ear, Nightwing grabbed his arm. It seemed that he had known Batman had been there the entire time. The long haired thief turned round and delivered a brutal blow to the Caped Crusader’s jaw.

So it looked like there was going to be another fight. He hated this; he loved the man behind the mask. There was no way either of the pair were going to win the fight, it was the same problem that they had had in the bank.

Only this time, Batman had the advantage. As Nightwing was drawing back in preparation to hit the other man, Robin slipped out of the place he had been hiding and jumped onto Nightwing’s back and removed the card.

Nightwing blinked and looked around as though realising where he was for the first time.Then his eyes fell on Batman.

"Batman?" He nodded, "Put the bag down Nightwing." The other man did as he asked, "come on, the police will be here soon."


*****

Dick Greyson looked around the lounge in Wayne Manor, a room he had been in many times before. Bruce had just got off of the phone with Commissioner Gordon. He had convinced the Commissioner not to press charges against Nightwing, and he had returned the money that Nightwing had taken from the bank.

"Where is he Dick?"

"A warehouse on the out skirts of Gotham." They'd go there tomorrow, right now he had to explain to Dick about what had happened before they had argued and he needed to see how, if, they would move on from it. 'We'll live our lives.'

"Look, Dick, about before you left."

"It doesn't matter Bruce, I understand that you were only trying to protect me." Bruce nodded and glanced around the room as though trying to find something to talk about. It had never been this tense between them.

"You know that I care for you right?"

"Why do I get the feeling that there is more to that sentence?" Dick asked. Bruce looked up sharply, alarmed.

"There isn't."

"Please tell me the truth, you can tell me anything, or you used to be able to."

"Dick, the truth is, well for a while now." Dick gave Bruce a pointed look that clearly said 'get on with it.' "I love you." It was whispered, barely heard.

"What?"

"I love you." This time it was said louder, clearer, "I care for you so much more than I should." Dick smiled but it was lost on the other man, who was still staring determinedly at the floor. He went and knelt in front of Bruce and tilted his chin up till they were looking in each other's eyes.

"I've felt the same way for a long time." He leant forward and pressed his lips against the other man's.

It started gentle then rose in passion, teeth nipped at lips and tongues thoroughly explored the mouths they'd both longed to taste.

Dick slid his hand down Bruce's back and then slipped it under his shirt to feel the skin below. Old religious warnings flashed into Bruce's mind. This was wrong, unnatural, evil. But it felt the opposite, how could it not be right, natural and so, so, good.

Bruce allowed his own hands to wander and then moaned as Dick's fingers found his nipple. A polite coughing alerted them to a presence in the room.
"It's about time that you admitted your feelings, but if you plan on going much further, may I suggest that you find somewhere more private?"

Bruce smiled as Dick turned bright red and hastily backed away from him. Alfred had known about his feelings for Dick even before he did and from the looks of things he'd known that Dick had felt the same way. Blast the old man, why hadn't he told them?!

But it didn't matter now anyway, they'd found out on their own. The question was now where would they go from here? And would Nightwing consider working with Batman? Bruce had to admit sometimes he still really could use Dick's help. 'We'll take the punches every day.'

And, call him old fashioned but as much as he did want to make love to Dick he was not going to go too fast. And another thing that he knew he would have to think about was if they were to come out, people’s reactions were not going to positive and there was a good chance that he would lose some of his investors.

He knew that many people of Gotham already suspected that there was more to his and Dick’s relationship than met the eye. Those rumours greatly helped by the gossip papers, it seemed that whenever they didn’t have anything interesting to print they would add another story about them.

It hadn’t mattered when he first took Dick in because the boy, and that is what he was – a boy, did not read the papers and if he did he did not understand the suggestive contents. It was when Dick had become a teenager that Bruce had first noticed the frustration every time a story like that was printed.

So what would they do now? What would happen to Dick’s career? The police force was not very supportive of homosexuality. One thing that he knew for sure was as long as Dick was happy with their relationship he would make it work. He didn’t care what anyone else thought. ‘Even if no one understands.’

Dick took Bruce’s hands and gently began to lead him up to his? Their? Bedroom. When they got in there the younger man sensed Bruce’s reluctance, “Hey! Nothing is going to happen that you don’t want.” But that was the thing wasn’t it? He did want it, wanted it very much in fact. His confusion showed on his face and Dick just smiled patiently at him. He knew from experience that getting Bruce to talk was a long, slow process. He also knew from painful experience that if one of the two was not ready for anything heavy… and there was *no* way that he was going to push Bruce into anything.

Bruce gazed at his ward, he’d do anything for this man and he’d do anything that he wanted. As he thought it, he realised that it was true. Dick walked up to him and put his arms round Bruce's neck and pulled his head down for a long passionate kiss.

“What do you want?” Dick asked him quietly.

“You.” It was a cliché he knew, but it was true.

Dick nodded and gently began to remove his shirt. He leaned forward and smiled at the hiss that Bruce let out as his tongue grazed the other man’s nipple. The rest was a blur to Bruce. He smiled as he lay in the afterglow, young lovers were *definitely* the way to go! Though he was worried that he wouldn’t be able to keep up.

He grinned as he remembered the feel of Dick entering him, how could that be wrong? Smiling he remember the look of happy shock on his lover’s face when he had asked him to be inside of him. He knew that the younger man understood the trust that was needed for him to ask that. He also knew that Dick knew trust was a problem for him. But he felt that as long as he had Dick he could face anything. Even the reactions of the people he knew, should they be good or bad. ‘And I don’t really give a damn if we’re stigmatised.’

But they’d deal with that some other time. Right now they were both exhausted. Dick snuggled closer to him and placed his head on his chest,

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

He hadn’t had much luck with relationships in the past but he was going to try his hardest to make sure that this relationship worked. He wanted this one to last. But only time would see if that happened and he hoped that it would. ‘But we keep together you and I.’

FIN