Author: Kate R.
Disclaimer: All belong to Joss
Rating: PG-13 to R
Pairings: Giles/Ethan
Summary: What does Giles Wish for?
Healing
by Kate R.
"I don't know Buffy," Giles finally growled. "Why don't you tell me what it should say eh?"
"I wish you'd stop being so sarcastic and distracted, Giles. I mean it's selfish of you not to be here to do this for me!"
"You wish, eh?" Giles asked. "Well if Wishes were sodding horses, beggars would Bloody Ride! You have the books, you have my notes, and I don't have time to do it for you tonight. Good Bloody Day!"
Giles had stormed out after that and Xander had finally gotten why Angel had asked Dawn if she wanted some ice cream and then sent her and Wesley out to get it. Angel had seen the explosion coming and once Giles had left, Angel had given them all the most disgusted look Xander had ever had directed at him.
"He has a life outside of you children," Angel had said as he walked out the swinging doors of the library. "Grow up."
Xander had thought about it, ignoring Buffy and Willow calling Giles selfish and come to the conclusion he owed Giles an apology. They all did really but he knew Buffy and Willow would never come on their own.
Xander sighed as he found his way to Giles' house and was about to knock when he noticed the door was ajar. On alert for trouble he slipped into the condo and looked around. Nothing Looked out of place. He heard Giles' voice coming from the loft so he crept quietly up the steps to see whom he was talking to. When he got there, he froze.
Ethan Rayne was lying in Giles' bed and god did he look bad. He looked---looked like he'd been beaten nearly to death. And Giles---Giles was reading poetry to him. He was reading and then he stopped suddenly and began to talk about his day:
"I'm tired of playing Rupert, luv," Giles said to the unconscious man. "I'm so bloody tired of being something I'm not. If you were better, we'd be gone from here in an instant but you aren't and I won't leave you here so we're both stuck. I wish I'd told you all of this before that last beating the Council gave you. Wish I'd made you stay with me here instead of in that rattrap of a motel where they could have found you. Wish I could make you better. Yeah, like I told the children, 'If wishes were horses, beggars would ride'. I love you Eth. I love you and I'm sorry for this. I'm sorry I went back to my father, sorry I left you alone. I'm sorry for everything love, it wasn't your fault. None of it. Not the conjuring, not Randall, not the killing. That was all me not listening to you. I should have trusted you about your own limits but I pushed you. And then, to make it worse I blamed you and I an away and I knew I was running from myself. It wasn't you, luv. It was never you. It was I. I'm sorry, Eth. Sorry you paid for my errors. Sorry you paid for my arrogance. God you're the only one who paid at all aren't you? You lost everything because they turned on you too. God, Eth, I'm sorry. But you aren't alone anymore. I'm here with you and I'm never leaving you again. Better late then never eh? If Wishes were Bloody horses---." Giles trailed off and Xander stared as he realized the librarian was crying.
"Beggars would ride," Xander whispered to himself as he went down the steps and made Giles tea and then cooked him some grilled cheese. If Giles was taking care of Ethan, someone needed to take care of Giles.
"Thank you, Xander," Giles whispered when Xander set the sandwich and tea in front of him ten minutes later.
"You're welcome, G-Man," Xander said. "Or is it Ripper? I heard you say act like Rupert so I'm guessing Rupert is an act."
"Always has been, always will be," Giles said. "Don't tell anyone, Xander. They won't understand."
"I won't," Xander, whispered as Giles lay on the bed and gathered the unconscious man into his arms. Giles smiled as he shut the light off with magic and Xander went down and crashed in the guest room.
He would stay tonight. And tomorrow? Tomorrow, he would make Giles real food for breakfast.
He would help his friend like his friend always helped him.
He finally got it. He finally realized that Giles wasn't God and he didn't know everything. Giles was a man. Just a man. And like any man, he needed help and he had limits. Xander could give him one but the other, Giles would have to realize for himself. Xander settled in to sleep and though on what was going to happen when Buffy found out like he knew she would eventually. Guess he'd find out then. He was tired now and wanted some sleep. Just some sleep before his day started. Sleep.
END PART 1