Just the Bang and the Clatter

Author: Thrinn

thrinn@yahoo.se

Summary: Aftermath of Not Fade Away.

Rating: NC-17

Pairing: S/A

Warning: None, angsty

Spoiler: AtS Not Fade Away

Disclaimer: To coin a phrase: Hello! Obviously so not mine, or they'd still be on the air! Duh!

Author's Note: This is the first S/A I've ever posted, but after that one hour of screaming "NoNoNo!" and then another two hours of cursing and feeling utterly bereft this is what I wrote. Took me another three days to get it almost to what I wanted. Thanks Joss for a wonderful five years, and for showing us that the fight goes on. I'm not touching the way they survived. As with the fight, it's not important how, only that they do.

Feedback: Yes, pretty please with a cherry on top!



Just the Bang and the Clatter
by Thrinn

With the rain pouring down over them, Spike was the one who dragged Angel from the battlefield. A dirty little alley covered in blood and gore.

They were wet, soaked to the bone, but it wasn't water that dripped onto the concrete of the abandoned warehouse. Two steps and Spike collapsed. Angel fell to the ground beside him, his arms and legs spread out.

Angel couldn't move. His body was torn and ripped. Broken bones ground against each other when he tried to lift his arms or legs. And his face... All that escaped his throat were small gasps and moans. His blood soaked out from the wounds on his back and chest and legs and arms into his clothes and out onto the rough concrete beneath him. He was bleeding to death. At least he'd gotten to slay a dragon. A gurgling laugh escaped his lips when he thought of it.

Thunder split the sky and lit up the floor where they lay.

With a few gasping breaths Spike managed to crawl back onto his knees. His hands dug under his t-shirt and found the shards of metal and wood still stuck inside his flesh. He pulled them out, one by one, screaming every time. He bled a lot, but wasn't dying. Not yet at least. He left Angel where he lay and hunted down something to eat.

There were cats and rats a plenty and he gorged himself on the virtual feast. Rodent had never tasted so good.

Once he'd taken care of himself, he returned and gathered Angel up into his arms. A pool of blood had formed underneath the darker man. "Drink," he whispered. "Drink you stupid bastard."

Another small heave and Angel was at his throat. Spike cut himself and pressed unresponsive lips to the wound. With the first drop Angel attached himself like a leech to the wound and drank slowly but greedily. He managed to lift an arm and tangle his fingers into Spike's wet hair.

Another moment and then they both fell back to the ground. Thunder shook the sky and earth again but it was the sob that tore apart the silence completely. Hard hands grabbed at leather, hair and skin, fingernails clawed at skin and muscle, wanting closer, needing to be nearer. They pulled at each other and kissed, breathing and crying harshly.

Spike licked at Angel's cheeks, tongue lapping almost brutally over the stubble to get at the salty tears. He claimed Angel's pliant mouth and forced his tongue inside, searching out every crevice and soft curve.

The kisses turned violent, their bodies still strung high from the fight. They snarled and bit and tore at each other until Spike grabbed Angel's face and Angel cried out in pain.

"Christ," Spike whispered and ran his fingertips over the torn mess. He'd never be called Angelic again.

"Hurts, God it hurts," Angel rasped.

"Shh," Spike soothed. He bit into his own tongue, nearly cutting it in half, and with the bloodied organ began to bathe Angel's face and clean it. Panting breaths told him Angel wasn't only in pain,and he grinned savagely as he dug his tongue into the wounds and licked and kissed as much as he cleaned them.

Finally he pulled away and looked at the face beneath him. Still wounded and raw, but less than it had been.

"We have to keep moving," he whispered. He lifted Angel up onto his feet and dragged him out of the warehouse and into the rain again to find somewhere they could rest for just a short moment.




part 2.

They came to the Hyperion through the sewers. It was the only place Spike had been able to think of to go.

The old hotel was dark and grim, just the way it had been when Angel first returned to it. Every now and then lightning lit the halls and empty rooms. Their footsteps echoed around them, with only the ghosts there to hear it. Angel had always felt them, and been comforted by their presence. Now he just wished they would leave him the hell alone. He'd had enough of ghosts to last him eternity. Enough of ghosts and pain.

Spike went to the first clean room he found and stripped them both quickly and efficiently. He left the bathroom light off and turned the water on hot and lowered Angel into the bathtub before getting in behind him. Angel sighed as he was immersed in the water, and then Spike cleaned him off.

The water had to be changed three times before all the blood and dirt was gone. Angel was still bleeding in some places.

Spike found blankets and pillows and made them a little nest on an old bed that still had a mattress. He found Cordelia's old first aid kit as well. Wounds were cleaned, bones finally set and re-set and bandages wrapped around chest and torn face.

Clean and wrapped, they lay on the bed in the dark feeling raw and torn. The rain still smattered against the windows and every now and then they could hear a car or truck pass outside. The thunder raged on. Their bodies were entwined, arms curled around backs, hands tangled in hair and legs wrapped around each other. Slowly they began to move.

A quiet desperation Angel had felt growing inside him ever since his plan began to take shape bubbled up to the surface and he kissed at Spike's scarred and bruised skin. Spike reciprocated, rubbing against him and licking at the blood that escaped the almost healed wounds. Angel reached up and nipped and licked at Spike's lips.

Then Spike sat up and pulled the larger man into his lap and rocked him gently. The desperation almost became insanity as Angel tried to crawl inside Spike's very skin. They kissed again, frantically, brutally, and clawed at each other in desperation. Suddenly Spike rolled them both over and shoved Angel's legs apart, left hand finding it's way down unerringly. Angel cried out when he felt the first touch and then he could only tremble.

Spike licked and touched him everywhere, giving and taking comfort. New bruises appeared on the once so flawless skin. He stroked Angel hard and sucked on his own fingers before pushing them in to the other man. Angel moaned and buried his face in the pillow. Spike removed it and made him meet his eyes. A few breaths and Angel blinked. When Spike was certain he had the brunette's complete attention he scissored his fingers and watched Angel suck in a surprised breath.

Another breath, and Spike sank into the body beneath his, all the way in.

Angel cried out and flung his head backwards. His hands sought Spike's and held them in a crushing grip. Spike squeezed them back, and then he moved. Angel cried out again and flexed his hips. Spike moved, slowly, then harder as Angel began to pant and beg for it. Harder, faster, more. He tore and bled and Spike pushed harder. The blonde released one hand and shifted, lifted Angel's thigh up and penetrated deeper.

The grunts and sounds of flesh slapping against flesh echoed around them, cocooning them. Angel arched his back and opened himself wider for the penetration. He'd never felt anything like it, never felt anyone so close as he had at that moment, and he couldn't stop himself begging for more.

Spike stopped suddenly, and pulled almost all the way out, leaving only the cock-head inside. Angel whimpered and snarled, demanding Spike push back in. But the blonde had other ideas. Gently he began to rock so that his cock-head was the only thing penetrating Angel. Angel shuddered with the sensation, and when it got too much he begged again. One last time Spike thrust in, tearing the delicate tissues around him again, and came. Angel felt the fluid coating his insides and it was enough to set him off as well. He lay limp as Spike snuffled around him, licked and tasted his skin. Slowly he went lower and found himself between Angel's legs and eagerly cleaned up any trace of their coupling.

Angel shuddered when he felt the tongue enter him and finally closed his eyes. He was brought to another orgasm and Spike cleaned that as well before embracing him, and settled his fangs over Angel's nape possessively. Finally they fell into dreamless sleep.




part 3

They woke moments from dawn, Angel still wrapped in Spike's arms.

Sometime during the night the pain had lessened and been replaced with an ache of a different kind. It felt... good. He wasn't sure if he was allowed to feel good anymore. Almost as if sensing the brooding coming, Spike squeezed him closer, and fangs settled on his neck again. Angel went still and limp, taking momentary comfort in that proprietary embrace.

After a few moments Angel looked up and met Spike's eyes. The blue had lost some of its shine, and the lines around the full lips were deeper, harsher. There was a little less hate in the eyes as well, replaced by more understanding. He wondered if the same change could be seen in his own face. Then he remembered, and for once he was glad he had no reflection.

Spike lifted a hand and brushed a thumb down Angel's cheek softly along the injury. It would never heal properly. They'd left the eye undamaged, but the skin and the eyebrow... Scars from claws ran down vertically from the nose and brow to the jaw. Angel closed his eyes and turned his head away so Spike wouldn't see the ugliness.

Spike smiled, turned the face back and kissed Angel right between the eyes.

"They'll be coming," he whispered.

Angel nodded. Yes, they would. The wolf, the ram, and the hart. They'd be hunting the vampires down until the ends of the Earth. There would never be peace for them now, not after what they'd done. He blinked rapidly. When he felt Spike's hand on his hair he rolled out from the embrace and stood. He dressed quickly, in clothes Spike must have hunted down somewhere. They weren't clean, but at least they weren't bloody. Spike's hand on his thigh stopped him, and he glanced down at the blonde. Spike found a bag and shoved some of his things into it, showing his intent to come along.

"I have to go alone. They'll come, and they'll kill everything around me. I have to protect the ones I can..."He closed his eyes and tried to swallow past the lump in his throat. It felt raw.

"Gonna protect me too?" Spike asked and stood. He dressed, shrugging into his coat and picked up a dagger from the floor.

"Gonna protect everyone."

"Yeah, 'cos you're a bloody champion. Well, know what, hero? You're not alone. We do this together, or we don't do it at all," he said, in a voice low and soft.

Angel shook his head. He took a deliberate breath and grabbed his still bloodied sword. He tucked it into a holdall and shoved some shirts and pants into it. What else would he need?

"They only want me," he said. He turned and touched the scar on Spike's eyebrow. It had deepened as well. There was another scar on his pale collarbone, right where a sword had barely missed the slim throat. "If you come, they'll hunt you too."

"Then we fight them. Like we always do." The quiet intensity almost undid Angel completely.

"No!" he snarled. His fingers tightened around Spike's throat. "No! Not you. This is not a fight we can win Spike! We don't get to live happily ever after! They'll hunt me down and destroy me."

"And I'm telling you that they'll be hunting us both. Together. I'm not leaving you."

"We can't win!" Angel screamed. He beat Spike back and shoved the sword against his throat. "Is this what you want? To die? They won't let us die, Spike. They'll keep us alive for eternity, torment us and make us beg for a death that will never come! They'll make us suffer, bleed and beg. They won't let us die!"

"I know that. I'm not leaving you. Not after last night. I'm not letting you go ever again. You're mine, as much as I am yours now."

Angel squeezed his eyes shut. He couldn't take this, couldn't handle Spike being so earnest and pledging his life for such a hopeless cause. It would all end in misery and pain. Spike eased the hands and weapon away from him, and in turn embraced the other vampire. He snuffled into Angel's throat and licked at the soft skin.

"Together we'll be strong enough. We can't win this war, like you said. But we can damn well make them hurt. You're not alone, Angel. I came to you for a reason, and I don't know what that might have been. But here I am, and I'm telling you, no matter what the original reason was I've made my choice. I'm not changing it. They can't take you from me."

At that Angel opened his eyes and met the earnest gaze. And finally the shell he'd built around him cracked, and he reached out blindly as tears poured down his cheeks.

"I'm so afraid for you," Angel whispered, his voice hitching. "For you, and for Connor. I can't.. If anything happens to..."

"Kill 'em all," Spike whispered and squeezed his hand.

Together they descended the stairs into the lowest section of the hotel, and into the sewers. With one last look behind them - at a past they would never be able to reclaim - they were gone.

Three o'clock in the morning
It's quiet and there's no one around
Just the bang and the clatter
As an angel runs to ground

Just the bang
And the clatter
As an Angel
Hits the ground.

-U2, Stay (Faraway So Close), Zooropa