Title: Sober Revelations

Sober Revelations
by Caliadragon

Wes, Andrew and Connor headed up the stairs to tell Xander the good news. Mostly, Andrew and Connor were pulling a semi drunk Wes up the stairs. The former watcher/demon hunter was too busy giggling and asking them if they wanted a repeat performance. "I think you need to sober up first Wes," Connor told him, amused. He figured Wes would pass out soon, then he and Andrew could play with Xander.

Unless, of course, Xander wanted to go blow something up again, then they would be playing follow the leader. Maybe they could have sex afterward. Andrew looked over at Connor and rolled his eyes. The other boy had his horny expression on his face. He was either thinking about killing something, sex, or both. And people said he was weird.

Andrew meanwhile, was thinking about sex and Xander. Anya reminding everyone of that thing he did with his tongue had made Andrew hard. Then there was the whole freak out factor of being a daddy. How hot was that? He was so cool he got a guy pregnant?

Wes began to hum to himself, images of a nekkid Xander running through his head. When he first met Xander, he never would have thought that the boy was such an enthusiastic lover. Then there was the whole willing to share thing. No one knew that both he and Xander had spent that summer in Oxnard together. He sighed in fond remembrance.

Now that Angel decided that he could be more of a stud in Sunnydale than the big city, he and Xander were having more fun together and sharing with their friends. Now his Xander was preggers. Hmmm... Wes had heard that pregnant women were highly sexed during certain parts of their pregnancy. He really hoped that was true, and that it affected Xander, even though he was a man. Xander was highly sexed already. Wes' brain experienced a short circuit at that point, and he could only grin dopily and drool.


Dawn kept staring at Xander with a look of awe and amusement on her face. Only Xander, she thought faintly. She wondered who the baby's father was. Dawn may be young, but she wasn't stupid. She was sixteen and had friends who were already having sex. She wasn't though. It was kinda hard when your guardian was a slayer and your best friend was a vampire who, souled or not, was maniacally protective. That didn't even cover Xander or the rest of the Scoobies.

"So, do you want a boy or a girl?" Dawn ducked the pillow that Xander threw at her, and giggled at the mock glare he threw her. Xander was so sexy when he pouted.

"I have no idea, I'm still trying to get over being pregnant," Xander sighed.

"I know, I have to say though that was a pretty impressive explosion. Do you think Amy's dad will buy her a new car?" Dawn asked, snickering as she thought about the Porshe Xander blew up. Giles still hadn't figured out that she had helped Xander distract Amy long enough to blow her car up.

It wasn't like the witch had been hurt. Besides, neither she nor Xander had magic or super strength, and they both owed the witch a payback for her magical meddling.

"If he does we'll just have to think of some other way to destroy it. I promised Giles I wouldn't play with explosives any more." They both pouted over that.

Their attention was pulled to the door as Wes, Andrew and Connor came stumbling through it. Or more like Wes was stumbling and brought the other two with him. "Xander baby, guess what?" Wes purred drunkenly.

Xander and Dawn grinned at one another as they took in Wes' condition. "What?" Xander asked.

"The spell made you pregnant by the first people you had sex with after the spell was performed. Your havin' my baby and Andrew's baby and Connor's baby," Wes babbled.

Xander looked at Connor and Andrew in horror, silently hoping it was just the liquor talking. "It's true," Connor told him.

Xander growled, Dawn squealed. "Let's go blow something else up!" they yelled in unison.

"Oops," Wes snickered and passed out.

The End