The wine mellowed him. Gil's smile and his laugh, played a fine refrain across Nick's nerves as outside the sky darkened and the weather began to improve.

It was just gone nine when they polished off the bottle and Gil said the words that would entwine their lives forever.

"You scared the life out of me this morning."

Nick frowned, then smiled. "Scared me too."

Gil nodded. "I know. Jim told me what happened." Reaching across, he patted Nick's arm.

Physical contact was rarer than hearing Grissom laugh. Nick was suddenly glad of it, because the heat from Gil's palm, even through the sweater, went straight to his groin.

The touch was swiftly withdrawn. Gil rose from the couch, picking up the two empty plates and stacking the cartons on top, taking them into the kitchen.

Nick paused before following. "When he dropped through the ceiling... the drugs made it difficult to think but I kept remembering Amy Hendler and how you'd talked her down." He rounded the counter and leaned on it, placing his glass deliberately on the clean surface. Gil was watching him with interest, leaning against the cupboards a few feet from him.

"You did good. You did everything you should have done, Nicky."

Shaking his head, letting his breath out in a deep whoosh, he admitted, "I was so fucking scared."

"Of course you were. A madman fell into your living room." There was no humour in the words, just fact, but when he next spoke, there was more. "Everything you said to him was right."

Nick felt something heat up inside him. "I thought he was going to kill me, but when I thought he was going to kill himself.... I couldn't let him... I couldn't!"

Gil stepped forward and reached out, stemming the building hysteria with the force of his own dominance. "He didn't, Nicky. You stopped him. You were brilliant."

"He watched everything, Gris!" His voice rose. "He lived with me."

"Not any more. And never again." Gil grasped Nick's shoulders. "You beat him. You were stronger than him."

"Gil...." It was a warning, one that flashed in the almost black eyes.

"I mean it, Nick!" The other man wasn't looking, wasn't watching. His closeness was doing more than stopping the hysteria, it was replacing it with something much more powerful.

"Gil, please....." Nick's hands flexed at his sides, aching to grab what he'd been so desperate for for so long.

Blue eyes shone with pride. "You won."

Nick pounced.

His hands flew to Gil's throat, wrapping around, cradling. The other man froze for a split second. Nick mistook it for consent and stepped forward, taking Gil in an open-mouthed kiss.

Not knowing quite what to do, the older man accepted the contact but the moment he did his body wanted in on the action. Without thinking, he wrapped his arms around Nick as he was pushed back against the
kitchen counter.

Nick's hands were all over him, pulling his shirt from his trousers. He felt fingers on his skin, stroking over his belly, circling around to the small of his back.

"Nick...." But his own voice was barely a whisper and already his mouth was finding its way back to the other man's, his tongue sliding between the welcoming lips.

It had been way too long since he'd been touched and kissed like this, since anyone had desired him this way. His own hands were busy with Nick's T-shirt, pushing it out of his way, smoothing over the firm,
warm skin up to pebble-hard nipples.

He knew he should stop this now, before they went too far, before they did something they'd both live to regret. But he couldn't.

Nick was sucking on his tongue like a starving man, touching him like he was God's gift. He couldn't stop it any more than he could stop his cock from sitting up and begging.

Dragging his mouth from Nick's, he lifted his head, banging it against the cupboards behind him. "Nicky...."

Wide, black eyes locked with his. "Let's move this."

Breathing erratic, Gil could only nod his agreement.

It wasn't easy to walk, kiss and fondle at the same time. Gil's mouth on Nick's neck, on his throat and once he'd managed to tear the T-shirt out of his way, exploring further. Nick kept Gil close, a strong arm around his lover's waist, holding them groin to groin.

They got stuck at the base of the stairs, neither willing to let go.

Gil was the first to raise his head, to back away just an inch. Nick's fingers clawed his back, under his shirt.

"Nicky, easy," he managed, "we'll do this." Taking his hands from Nick's body he cupped the youthful face. "We'll do this."

One of Nick's hands came up, brushing through Gil's greying hair. "I've wanted you... so long."

"I know. Oh God, I know."

Hand wrapping around the back of Nick's neck, Gil kissed him, mouth open, tongue scavenging.

One step at a time they climbed the stairs, Nick managing to get Gil's shirt off his shoulders, abandoning it half way up. They were on the landing by the time he got one hand down the front of his lover's pants, inside his boxers. The moment the hot palm closed around his cock, Gil howled.

"Nick... no...."

But his pleas only encouraged the other man to surround him further, to push all material out of the way and to take him tighter into his grip.

With tears in his eyes, Gil came hard over Nick's hand, unable to stop, unable to keep his anguished sounds to himself.

But as much as he was pulling every last drop from his lover, Nick's free hand was on his face, stroking his hair. "It's okay, Baby. You needed that. Just let go. It's okay."

Gil wound his arms tightly around Nick and buried his face in the bare shoulder, sobbing as his body gave up everything it had. And Nick held him, murmured to him that he was loved, he was needed. He wasn't
alone any longer.

For Gil it was like having someone tear out his mind and read his thoughts back to him. His whole body was trembling, barely able to stand, and it was Nick who kicked open the bedroom door and led them
both over to the bed.

Back in control, Nick took his time. Once Gil was naked, he stood at the end of the bed and stripped off his own clothes, kneeling at his lover's side.

"I'm incredibly flattered, Gil," he murmured, stretching out to kiss the waiting mouth. "A guy like you losing it over a guy like me."

Having had time to pull himself together, Gil returned the kiss, combing still shaking fingers into Nick's silky hair.

"Christ, Nicky.... Look at you. Why the hell would you want...?" Another kiss silenced him.

"I'll show you why. And don't think it's just for tonight, don't think it's just for comfort because it isn't. And I know you wouldn't do this if you didn't feel just as strong for me. I'm not using you, Gil."

Knowing he would take some convincing, Nick worked his way down from Gil's mouth, kissing, licking and nipping as he went. He favoured any spot that made his lover shiver; the skin along his collarbone, the hollow of his throat, the sensitive buds of his nipples (Gil arched as Nick took each between his teeth and bit down gently, promising more later).

As he reached the groin, he asked Gil to turn over which he did with only a moment's hesitation. Nick pushed one knee up before working down one leg and up the other, biting at the soft skin behind his lover's knees, nibbling at the taut flesh at his ankles, kissing each toe in turn.

But when he reached the waiting ass, when he teased the buttocks apart, Gil froze.

Without hesitation Nick once again stretched himself along his lover's body, kissing first the back of his neck then moving over him until they were face to face.

"Love you," he murmured, tracing Gil's lips with the tip of his tongue. He could see the overwhelming mix of bewilderment of arousal on the face he adored and his heart almost broke. "Love you so damn
much."

Gil's fingers spread on his chest. Then with a hesitation that took Nick's breath away, he was kissed, lips playing on his own, tongue stroking surely into his mouth, tracing the curve of his pallet.

"Fuck me," Gil murmured finally, the words sounding as if he was submitting to his own sacrifice.

"No, Gil. I'm going to make love to you, hard and deep, and you're going to come for me again."

The short laugh was something else Nick knew he didn't want to hear again. "I'm old enough to be...."

"To be my lover, my friend, and my boss."

Sliding down the smooth, tanned body, Nick proceeded to make up for them not having planned this. He pressed his tongue inside his lover's body, going as deep as he could, licking, tasting, relaxing, opening.

As some point, Gil told Nick to turn around, taking the hot, desperate cock into his mouth, adding his own saliva to the lubrication Nick was providing.

Nick held on as long as he could before kneeling between Gil's legs and rubbing the head of his cock against the wet muscle. Hands on his lover's hips he eased himself past the tight obstruction into the
slick channel, feeling Gil tense under him, feeling the constriction as a sharp pain.

"Breathe," he instructed in a harsh breath. "Breathe."

Gil pulled in a deep breath and let it out slowly, relaxing every muscle in his body.

Nick eased inside, lying along his lover's back. Wrapping one arm around Gil, he slid deeper and stilled.

"Oh, God...." A tear spilled from his eye, dropping to the other's shoulder.

Gil found his hand and grasped it, hanging on. He could feel his cock hardening again. "Nicky...." All other words failed him as Nick started to move, slow, round thrusts of his hips, penetrating as deep
as he could without letting go.

Eventually he pulled his hand from Gil's and wrapped it around his lover's cock, slowly massaging. He could hear soft murmuring, leaned over and saw closed eyes, lips moving around barely spoken words. He thrust deeper, falling in love with every twinge of pleasure, every bolt of pain he sparked in the other man.

He felt his orgasm at the edges of his consciousness, desperately wanted to take Gil with him and tightened his grip, speeding his movements.

Gil screamed - actually screamed - and came again. And it was he who dragged Nick over the edge.

~

Nick imagined himself seeing the same sight every evening for the rest of his life. Heaven.

Gil was standing in his kitchen, wearing nothing but a white cotton shirt. Nick found himself salivating at the curve of his ass, the sensitive place where butt cheeks met strong thighs.

He'd been worried when he'd woken alone, but Gil's state of partial dress bolstered his confidence and his hope. Padding silently across the tiles, he drew his hands up over his lover's ass before sliding them around his waist.

It was the moment, he thought later, when it could have gone either way; relationship or one-night stand. When Gil leaned back into the circle of his arms and turned his head, mouth open to meet Nick's in a kiss, he knew this was a keeper.

"Coffee?"

Nick breathed in the other man, a heady aroma of sex and sweat. A maleness that spoke directly to Nick's cock. Running his hand down Gil's arm to his hand, he took the spoon and placed it on the counter.

"Later."

Gil turned in Nick's arms and met him in a long, deep kiss, hands against the smooth, bare, taut chest, spreading over sides down to settle on his hips.

"I know this wasn't what you had in mind when you came here," he murmured, almost apologetic.

Nick hesitated, chuckling at the answering expression. "No, not exactly. But that's not to say it's not the best thing that could have happened." Shimmying a little, he brushed his refreshed erection against his lover's equally enthusiastic cock. "Back to bed."

Gil glanced at the kitchen counter. Almost suggested it. But his fantasies could wait. They had their entire lives in front of them and from on in he was determined to live.


elfin@sundive.co.uk