Title: At the End of Twilight

Author: Cinmbria

Date: 8/13/03

Archive: yes, WWOMB and coffeeslash

Fandom: CSI Miami

Rating: R

Status: Complete

Pairing: Caine/Speedle

Summary: What happens when Caine asks for more than his lover can give?

Warnings: implied BDSM

Beta: the wonderful Monkey -Leah

Disclaimer: I don't own 'em.

At the End of Twilight

by Cinmbria

"Say it!"

The voice, deep and rough held a touch of anger. Caine bowed his head. He would not speak. Could not speak. Hearing his own voice would break the spell, signal his surrender.

Fingers wound tightly in his sweat slicked hair, twisting the short strands painfully and still he held his tongue, let his tormentor, his savior, his lover, hold him harshly.

This was his penance; on his knees like a supplicant for the blood of Christ, and he would not be weak.

"Say it!"

Again the voice, hovering over his ear, and he ignored the undertone of worry and fear. It wasn't done. He wasn't absolved. Speedle didn't understand.

He shook his head, bit his lip and ran his tongue over the small cut his teeth left. The taste of blood, coppery and sweet, lingered in his mouth. The fingers left his hair and floated down his neck, soft and light, skimming over his shoulders, a cool touch over heated skin.

"Again." He whispered. "Please." His voice trembled, wavering as Speedle's touch raised goose bumps over his abused skin.

A choked sob reached his ears. "I can't." And he felt lips on his nape, words whispered against his skin. "No more. No more, please."

It wasn't his voice begging for an end to his torment, but Speedle's.

Caine reared back and let his head rest against Speedle's bare chest. "Yes, more."

"Just say the words Horatio. God damn it say the fucking words!"

But he couldn't and he shook his head and set his lips in a tight line. He looked up into Speedle's eyes. They were bright with unshed tears, but it didn't stop him from asking, from needing.

He heard Speedle curse and he hung his head and braced himself. This time when the leather whistled through the air he was prepared, and still the pain twisted through him like an electric current; singeing his nerves, making his body tremble. Again and again the lash fell, and with each blow he was lighter, his blood more pure.

At last it was enough and he said the words, let them fall from his lips over and over until he felt Speedle's arms close around him.

"Thank you." He whispered hoarsely and when Speedle didn't speak he turned and wrapped his arms around Speedle's waist, sucking in a breath when the skin in his back protested the simple movement. "Thank you."

Caine floated, feeling only the fire in his back and the strength of Speedle's arms around him. Without that anchor of Speedle's touch, he would have flown away. It was almost desperate; the need to let his soul dissipate on the wind, to be nothing, to feel nothing and one day Caine knew he would step over the edge and let himself tumble into the true nothingness of death.

After a time the pain burned brighter, throbbing in time with the beat of his heart, gradually pushing the rapture further and further away. He didn't want to move then, not when each breath caused fire to race across his back, not when turning his head caused explosions of white in his vision.

Too far, they had gone too far tonight.

"Please don't ask me do this again." Speedle's words were quiet and held a note of desperation and grief. "I won't." His voice grew firmer. "I can't hurt you like this. I just can't do it anymore."

He nodded and rose slowly, wincing as his skin shifted and pulled against the welts on his back. Once on his feet he traced the line of Speedle's jaw with fingers that shook with exhaustion. "Okay." He whispered and drew his lips over Speedle's. "I won't ask again."

And that was it, the beginning of the end. They both knew it.

END