Someone like you

by Nancy.

C&C very welcome (please) at nimue@uole.com

Fandom: Dawson's Creek

Pairing: (Doug/Pacey)

Raiting: NC-17, I think

warning: consensual incest/consensual underage sex

Disclaimer: They belong to Kevin Williamson and other peolple, except me.

Distribution: If you want it, it's yours; just tell me.

Summary: After a talk, things happen

Many many Thanks to Tori for wonderful beta and encouragement, you're great, and -before you say something- you deserve every word. Thanks.

Someone Like You
by Nancy

Doug was having a nice and quiet evening in his house.

He was watching a movie that he had wanted to see for a long time now, Burned Money, and his feet rested over his wooden coffee table, not a nice thing to do, he knew that, but what in hell, he'll clean tomorrow.

Doug took a slip from his cold drink and smiled, a real smile, and relaxed.

He almost jumped out of his skin when a black thing went flying by his head, passed the television and after hitting the wall, rested on the floor.

"Keep that thing down" Pacey said from the door.

Doug put away his gun and looked at his younger brother's luggage, and then the hat that was now resting on the floor.

"What are you doing here?" Doug asked. "Shouldn't you be on your boat now, sailing along for three months with a young pretty girl?

What happened?" he asked.

"What do you think, Dougie?" His brother choose to ignore the nickname, just for this time.

"She didn't go, uh?" Doug turned off the TV, reminding himself of look for that movie in some other time, it was better if his brother didn't even catch a glimpse of this one, anyway he wanted to talk, and at this particular moment none of his friends would be a nice option.

"Oh, no. She did go"

The deputy opened his eyes widely, that, he didn't expect.

"What do you mean?"

"What do you think I mean, you're the detective, you tell me" Doug kept his mouth shut, this was not the right time to explain to Pacey the difference between a detective and his own job.

Pacey threw himself on the couch, and with a slow motion, rested his legs over the coffee table, looking for a comfortable position.

"She did go" he continued "she's too honorable for just not appear and let me go.

Do you know what's the worst part? I thought she was there for me, that she was gonna ask to go with me that she really wanted to be with me.

I actually believed that, in my little fantasy world, that is.

But no, she went and told me that she was very sad that things had gone bad between us, that we weren't meant for each other and all that crap that women says when the truth is that she never felt the same and I only was a little difficult between her and her soul mate, my ex best friend and I was only a little hindrance"

"Look, Pace..."

"Oh no, no, no, do you wanna know the worst part?" Pacey stopped his older brother in the middle of one futile attempt to comfort him. "The worst part is that...th th...they're back together"

"What! And she went to you to tell you that?" Doug didn't know why exactly but he had a strong desire to strangle little miss Potter at the simple nod his brother give him.

"It's okay, you know, if we see the positive part of the story it's that my intermission was the only thing those two needed to be aware that they still loved each other" Pacey said.

"If you say so. Why didn't you go, Pace, like the original plan?"

He sighed and tried to look for the right answer.

"I didn't want to runaway" Yeah, that was his brother, it didn't matter that going away was what he had originally planned to do. He thought that if he took a vacation then people would say that he ran away. Like the looser they knew he was. Pacey couldn't have that.

"Give me that"

He stole the drink for Doug's hand and slurped almost half of the thing, something he shouldn't have done. When the hot liquid passed his throat he coughed and was nearly spit the whole drink out. He cleared his voice.

"My God, Doug, what the hells in that? It's strong" he evilly smiled.

"you aren't supposed to drink this stuff you know. What if there's some emergency call and you have to go, you can't do that with this in your system" he said.

Doug smiled too.

"I'm off duty today, you're the one who shouldn't be drinking"

"Oh, C'mon, you're not gonna play daddy now are you."

"Of course not, but I'm not gonna be carrying you upstairs when you pass out, if you want to, you can have this" He passed Pacey a beer bottle at the same time took his glass from Pacey.

"But you aren't gonna be buddy-buddy with me either, right. I don't want to think that I'm in some parallel universe where Joey actually makes a decision and you and me are best buddies or something" Pacey joked.

"You don't have to worry about that" he tried to sound calm and uninterested but, but the truth was that reality was exactly like that parallel universe. Joey had made a decision, and now he was sorry he ever told her about his brother leaving the city. And now they were going along a lot better. Everything had started the night he had put his brother and his friends in jail. After that had come the advice about relationships, it was because of that, that Pacey was now living with him, in any other moment he surely would said no.

"Now you just have to worry about is finding something to do, something to distract yourself" He swore to himself, the last hobby of his brother had been repairing his 'True Love'. The last thing he needed now was to be reminded of his boat, but Pacey didn't seem to notice.

"I think I'm gonna sleep for the next three months"

"C'mon, you're young and nice, and your gonna find someone again, and this is gonna seems like no big deal" Doug said.

"It is a big deal!" Pacey shouted "It is for me anyway. And am I going to find someone else? Someone capable of giving me the butterflies, Doug? Let's check my love life, right? My teacher, who, let me remind you had to leave town, then McPhee who had to go to a mental hospital where she cheated on me, and then Joey. So who's gonna be my next love, a runaway nun?"

He chuckled over his own silly joke and drink from his beer bottle.

"And what about you big brother, when are you gonna find someone, you don't seem to have a very full love life, and you're nice too you know."

He shifted in the couch uncomfortable with the subject.

"It's okay, I'm gonna find someone too" and with that he closed that theme.

His smile got broader "I'm niced to huh?"

Pacey laughed actually.

"Of course you're nice, dummy. Why do you think I was worried that you were interested in my teacher?"

He sighed again, and in one quick move was resting is head on his brother chest, Doug stiffened and tried to remove the heavy body that rested over his body.

"C'mon Doug, I need comfort today."

"Okay" barely a whisper, with still some resistance he hugged his baby brother.

"You not gonna hit me are you?"

"I never hit you, Pace"

"Yeah, that was Pop" Doug stiffened again, but he wasn't going to ruin all the progress they had made by fighting about his dad.

They spent some time in silence, just enjoying the closeness and the drinks.

"Why were we always fighting, Doug? You know, the only memories that I've got of us is fighting, or yelling at each others." Doug made himself more comfortable and looked at his brother eyes.

"You hated me, bro?"

"No, no real hate, just angry I think, with everybody. I felt like an outsider in my own house, you know?

//yes//

I was angry with dad, for trying to make me in someone that I'm not.

//I know//

And with you, for always being on his side, for been his golden child."

"Sorry, I didn't know"

He hide his face in his brother's black shirt

"You crying?" //Don't let him be crying, please don't let him be crying//

"No, men don't cry" He repeated his father's words. A hard lesson that he had learned years ago.

Doug interlaced his fingers with the brown hair, calming him.

"I know, I'm sorry. It was easier to me, you know, when you were there. It was like you always messed up more and that made the things >I did wrong less important, at least, in his eyes. And I followed in >his steps, sometimes it even feels like I'm not me. That I'm him, and that scares me, I don't want to be him. Never. That's why I moved out." Doug said truthfully.

Pacey looked at his brother in a new light, it was the first time that he'd heard his brother being so open about his feelings. Maybe it was the atmosphere, maybe it was the drinks, who knew. But it was good, not because Doug was suffering, but because he made it known.

And it was his turn to comfort.

"You are not like him, you'll never become like him, ever, believe me. I told you, you're nice"

He slowly roamed his hand over Doug's shirt, trying for physical comfort, the only one he knew how to give.

"Was it worse, after I moved out?" He had to ask that, he always had felt guilty for having his own life.

"No, yes. No, it wasn't worse at home, it was the same." That meant that it was still horrible. "Well yes, it was worse for a time. I thought that you moved out because of me, that like dad said, I had said or done something wrong and pissed you off. I was a kid, I believed it for a time."

"That's not true, you know that now, right?" Doug asked.

"Yeah. And I didn't tell you to make you feel guilty, but we're being honest here right."

They hugged stronger this time, almost making it hard to breath.

Pacey drink the last remains of his third bottle, and looked puzzled at his brother when he laughed.

"What?" Yes, he thought that they were pathetic, but it wasn't a laughable subject. An image sparkled in his head out of the blue.

"You know what's funny. I actually painted a wall with 'Ask me to stay' over it, the whole town must have seen it since then."

Doug stopped cold, incapable of follow his brother's mind, and he didn't find that funny. He though that it was romantic and the girl was stupid for letting his brother go. If someone ever did something like that for him... it was better if he didn't even complete that thought.

"That's not why I'm laughing, you've got foam on your upper lip. Here, let me."

Still nervous about this whole open hearted conversation and the amount of liquor that he'd poured into his body Doug cleaned the upper lip, well, half of it, he stopped in the middle and let his thumb rest on the wet flesh. Pacey looked straight into his eyes and for one second the world stopped. The younger boy let his tongue flip over his upper lip, and the strange thumb, cleaning the foam of both.

Doug shivered, for a moment not in control of his body, he could only see everything in slow motion.

"Doug" Pacey said in a needy tone.

Pacey didn't think, he just went for his mouth, and kissed his brother full on the lips savoring the drink forbidden to him.

The kiss only lasted a couple of minutes, but being in the mouth of his brother, playing with his tongue, was intense. Pacey separated himself and gave him two little pecks covering his entire, now red and puffy, mouth before he lowered to the neck, letting a hot trail on the body. The older
man moaned and started to caress the back exposed to his hands.

"Love you, bro" he said. Suddenly Pacey's body stopped moving, just hot breath on his neck.

//What...// He looked at Pacey's sleeping figure and cursed. He wanted to move the boy off his body now, but he let go of that idea quickly, it wasn't good if Pacey woke up now. //Not with this erection//

So Doug moved with a lot of care away from his still asleep brother, and keeping his mind numb, he went for the covers and put them over Pacey.

//You were drunk, it's okay.//

//You weren't that drunk//

That was the worst part, he couldn't lie to himself. Yes, Pacey had started it, but the boy had been dumped, drunk and talking about things too personal, and he had said it, he needed comfort.

//needed comfort not to be seduced, you perv//

That had been a mistake, of that he was sure.

Doug knew that nothing could have prepared him for the kiss. Even now, the emotions were still pounding in his body, begging for release.

He accidentally brushed his hand over his groin.

Standing at the bottom of the stairs he looked at his sleeping brother and cursed himself.

What was he gonna do, jack off thinking of his youngest sibling?

That was disgusting. But the lower part of his body had a mind of his own and was still prouding erect.

With a disgusted sigh he went to his room, and took a cold shower.

*

Pacey awakend to the sunrise entering throw the window, warming his body. Still confused he looked at the covers over his body and tried to remember why in the hell he was sleeping on the couch.

Oh yeah.... headache, very big headache.

He hid his head in the cushion, the whole evening still fresh in his mind. He had kissed his brother,
something that he had never even dreamt about.

Not only about kissing his brother, but any man for that matter.

What had he said about his lovers, about the next one being a runaway nun? What about a cop brother?

Why did everything go so wrong with him? Not that the kiss had been bad, in fact the whole episode had been nice.

The shared closeness, the little touches, and the kiss too. This was insane, since when had he started to think about his brother like a lover, about take their relationship father, to a new level. He passed of the part of his mind that said it was only because you were dumped and in need of someone capable of helping him to get over Joey. He knew it wasn't only that. If that were true
there'd be no problem.

The real problem was that he did care about Doug, deeply, and now when he thought about him, his body reacted with a funny feeling, and he wasn't sure of anything any more. The cover thing had been a nice gesture, and warmed him in inside.

The headache was stronger now.

With a moan he got up, searching for the kitchen and some coffee, black coffee.

*

The past few days were a nightmare for Pacey. He was pretty sure that he wanted to talk about the incident, but anytime he tried to start a conversation, Doug ignored him. He had shattered his brother's illusions that in the drunkenness, he had forget everything about that night. Of course he hadn't, and wanted to confront things.

And Doug didn't. He often ranaway from the house taking every possible shift that could keep him out of the house the much as possible. They almost never saw each other, and every time that coincided in the house Doug found something to do in another room. And never touched Pacey again. If he had to give something to him, Doug made sure that their fingers never collide.

Pacey wanted to explore their relationship, but that was impossible. His little touches were brushed off, if he tried to sit near him to watch tv, Doug would stand up and leave the room.

That was driving Pacey nuts, he wanted to scream, and punch something. To confront, and he was determined to do it.

"Doug?" he called

Nobody answered him. He searched for his brother and found him in the living room, arranging some magazines.

He walked over and touched his big brother's shoulder.

"Doug?" He stiffened and took the hand off his body.

"I'm busy now, maybe later" he started to move toward another direction, ready to leave his brother talking to himself.

Pacey was past himself, he grabbed him by the arm and planted himself in front of him.

"What are you doing bro?" he sounded tired

"Just trying to talk" he sighed, wanted to be as honest as he could without freaking his brother out.

"I'm not sure what's happening to me, you know, don't know what I'm feeling" pacey started.

"Don't want to talk about that now..."

"We were getting along nicely, why can't we be that way again, the other night was special to us..."

Doug stared uncomfortably to the floor, founding a tiny spot more interesting than anything in the world. He didn't want to hear what Pacey started to talk about. He wasn't prepared to confront what was happening in his head and in his heart, he needed time, dammit.

"It was to me, Joey was very special to me. You know I have problems with dad, with my friends. I haven't seen them in a long time, my best friend doesn't talk to me, just like you now, Joey avoids me.."

//just like you now//

"Stop"

"No, we have to talk and we are going to talk now, we have to."

"God, you hung around Dawson too long, now you think that the word circles around you"

"That's not true!" he complained "I just want to solve this...thing between us"

But Doug was on a roll and wasn't thinking, he was focused in his own problems, and wanted to be honest too.

"And you're not the only one having problems" Doug shouted "you think that it was easy for me, a gay cop, trying to hide it from dad, from everyone, and you were there making your stupid jokes about my sexuality for everybody to hear!"

Pacey's face turned whiter, he stopped listening at mid sentence.

"Your...gay?" he muttered

"You knew that" he said matter of fact "But you don't know what you're doing, you keep whining and whining and..." he sighed "I don't want to talk about that right now." and with a shudder of shoulders, he left the room and went to his bedroom. Tired, he threw himself on his bed.

Pacey stopped himself for going to search for his brother, it wasn't the right time, maybe later.

Besides, was tired too.

*

"Can I came in?" Pacey asked, standing in his doorway looking guilty. Doug was resting in his bed, trying to forget the whole discussion.

But nothing could keep his attention for more than a couple of seconds.

"Sorry, I shouldn't..." With a wave of his hand Doug shushed his brother. It was okay, he had exploded too, and that wasn't right.

"It's fine" he reassured Pacey.

"Sorry about the jokes" it was the best that he could offer, his jokes had brought great pain to his brother and he didn't want that, ever. They were his only defense, with an older brother that he thought superior.

And in that time that he had thought that Doug hated him, he only wished that he had not made things so bad that he would never forgive him.

"It's okay, just no more jokes"

Pacey agreed, no more jokes, no more fear, no more hurt.

With tentative steps Pacey went near the bed and abandonly threw himself on the other side of the bed.

He felt Doug's body stiffen but tried to think about other stuff and ignore the hurt that the
rejection had caused.

"Are we okay?" He asked in a whisper.

Doug nodded, still never looking at his brother straight in the eyes. He knew he was being stupid but if he gave in and looked Pace, he would know in an instant that they weren't okay.

With a sigh Doug moved, creating a place for his brother, only for compensation he lied to himself, who quickly took it. And in trying to find body heat in the cold room, he found it in the chest of his brother

Again Doug choose to remain silent.

The silence became comfortable after a few moments, neither of them moving, not daring to say a word and ruin the atmosphere.

The movie was still going but none of them were watching it, even with Doug's eyes directed at the screen.

The older man felt a soft breath in his chest, and very slowly looked at his brother. He had his eyes closed and was having a quiet sleep.

With a lot of care, slowly, Doug brushed his fingers over the delicate cheekbone, with only his fingertips touching the soft skin.

//What are you doing?, abusing of your sleep brother again?, what are you sick? What are you gonna do after this, go look for little kids at school?//

Pacey is in school, a little voice keep telling him, but his hands still were touching him, not really
caring what his mind screamed at him, only the strong need in his body.

The slender fingers continued their journey to the pouty lips, finding them full. Then his hair, pressing his fingers threw the soft dark mass.

Almost imperceptible, for Doug that was lost in the feelings his fingers were giving him, a hand started to move over his chest. Slowly, Pacey moved his leg, resting it over his brother's, in a last attempt to catch his brother's attention as the younger man hid his head in the broad chest.

Doug finally noted the movements over his body but tried to convince that were only casual, but when the sneaky mouth found his nipple from over his T-shirt it was obvious what was happening.

"You awake, bro?" Pacey didn't answer, just pressed his hardeness to his older brother's thigh, letting him feel that this time was real, that he wasn't asleep and wanted this.

They kissed each other. Entering with his tongue in the velvet cavern of his brother's mouth, it
was a fantastic feeling.

Pacey sneaked his hand under his brother's cotton shirt, searching for the erects nubs. In a quick movement

Pacey took off his brother clothes, leaving him only in boxers.

They separated panting, trying to catch their breaths.

Pacey lowered himself and covered Doug's nipple with his mouth, nibbled at it.

"God" Doug moaned, and started to ask again what he was doing, but his body was happy with his brother's administrations. It wasn't only that, if he had been only and urgent body release he needed he could have always had a one nightstand or even a hooker but he was happy with his
brother and wanted to do this with him, not anybody else. If the action brought some consequences then they'd deal with them later.

And that was his last conscious thought. His nipples were reddened and his body arching for more.

He lifted his brother off his body and placeed him under him. He was sure this was the first time pacey had been with a man, and he wanted to make it memorable.

They kissed, starting with he full lips and going south licking at the exposed skin. In little time Pacey was naked and begging for more.

Doug explored every inch of his baby brother's body with his lips and hands, finding new erogenous spots all over. He lapped at the belly button making his lover giggle, and he loved it. It was so good to hear his brother laugh mixed with want in it.

Pacey gasped when his brother found his goal and bathed it with his tongue, playing special attention to the bulbous head. Pacey whimpered with need at his talented brother.

Noone had been this good with his body, pushed his buttons so well.

He was at the brinck of orgasm many times, never able to release his pleasure. His brother
cooled him off leaving his aching pole, nibbling at his exposed nuts.

"Please, Doug" his voice aching with need.

Doug nodded sensing the need and went back to the erection, and deep throated it. The younger man moved his hips in abandoned lust, whimpering in his passion, praying that this time Doug didn't stop.

Doug didn't, he kept going. Kissing the throbbing flesh, lovingly up and down, filling his mouth.

Pacey was close, and panting. Doug used his tricks to bring his brother to orgasm, he cupped Pacey testicles with his hand.

Pacey couldn't stop, with a hoarse cry he came in the mouth that keep pleasuring him. Doug was prepared and swallowed his lover's seed. He still cupped his brother.

When the last spasm subsided Doug lifted his body, covering Pacey's mouth with his own, the younger man tasted himself there, and moaned at that though.

Pacey roamed his hand over the older man back, stroking the muscles there.

"Should I do the same?" he asked, noticing the aroused state of his brother. He shaked his head saying no, that wouldn't be necessary.

"I'm fine" he smiled it was really okay.

"But I'm not" Pacey took control this time, kissing him open mouthed, his hand searched under the boxer, touching another man's penis for a first time, he gasped, it was hot and throbbed at his touch, it felt right.

They hugged, until Doug exploded in the fist that kept involving him. He knew he wasn't going to last, not with the boy as his lover.

The deputy assaulted his brother tongue one more time, then he collapsed in the bed, in one last attempt of strenght he took off his underwear, cleaning his body and Pacey's hand with it, then threw it to the floor.

Pacey drifted to sleep over his brother, head resting on his chest. This time Doug hugged him tightly, and drifted to sleep too.

fin, for now