Forget Me Nots.

Lopaka Tanu

Fandom: Due South

Coupling: Ray Kowalski/Benton Fraser.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Warning: Slash, Character Death later on, Violence, Language.

Archive: Say where and it is yours.

Universe: AU Takes place after Vecchio has come back. Fraser and Kowalski are still partners, and Kowalski is going by his own name.

Summary: What if Ray's forgetfulness, bad eye-sight, and inability to speak correctly were symptoms of something more? What if Fraser found out, but Ray himself was still in the dark about it?

Author's Note: Lyrics from Genuine's "Differences."

Forget Me Nots
by Lopaka Tanu

Part 1 "My whole life has changed."

Sitting at his desk, Ray twitched a pencil in agitation. This latest case was bothering him. Something about the way the woman was died did not settle well with him. How does a single, working, mother of three overdose on a drug used for seniors with Ahzlhimers. It just didn't make since. Welsh was about to close the case down and declare her death a suicide. Only his suspicion had left it open so far.

It was about this time Fraser sat down next to him, hat in hands. "Greetings, Ray."

'"ey Frase." He sighed as Fraser studied him with a critical eye. "Would ya stop that! I feel like I should be on a slide squirming around when you look at me that way."

Fraser sat up stiff. "I am sorry, Ray, in my curiosity, I was just wondering what was wrong with you. Figuring that if I studied your body language, I could accurately gage how best to approach you. Since it seems that it is no longer necessary, I will come out and ask you. What is bothering you, Ray?"

He shifted in his chair, turning to his partner. "Look, I'm sorry Frase, I have been having a rough time lately. Something 'bout this case just don't sit well with me, ya know what I mean?"

"Perhaps, if you told me, I might?" Fraser asked as he raised an eyebrow in question.

"Right, sorry." Ray turned the case files towards Fraser in the witness chair. "This woman, she was on her way home three days ago. Had to pick up her kids from school, a sophomore boy, and twin girls in junior school. So she knew they would be pissed if she was late. She never showed. They had to catch a ride home with friends. Two days later she turns up in the back alley of an
abandoned supermarket. Needle still in her arm, with her fingers on the plunger. Said she died of a massive altruism caused by a m and m that formed because of the large dose of this experimental drug in her system."

Fraser looked up at him with wide eyes and sighed. "I believe you mean aneurysm and embolism."

"Yeah, that's what I said. Besides, what's that any ways." Looking over Fraser's shoulder, he noticed the heat coming off the Mountie and sighed. If only Mounties weren't so true, honorable, and strait, he would show this one a good time. 'Way ta get yur mind off the case, Kowalski. Focus on the case, dead woman, remember?' "I'm sorry, what were ya saying?"

"Quite all right, Ray. I was explaining that, an aneurysm is when a blood vessel in the brain, bursts. In this case, it was caused by a traveling clot, or embolism. What do you find so hard to believe that this case is anything more than a suicide?"

"Come on Frase, you can't tell me that it doesn't strike you that this woman would forget all about her family, only to go get herself killed when trying to get high on medical grade drugs?" Ray crossed his arms and leaned back against his desk staring at his puzzled partner.

"As much as I might have once agreed with you Ray, since coming to Chicago, I have been made aware of much more... sinister things. I hate to say this, but she fits the profile to do exactly this." He scratched the back of his eyebrow as he watched his friend.

"Nah Frase, it ain't that easy. Sure, she had a rough life, no parents, miserable brats, dead beat husband, but she just doesn't seem the type to do this. Don't ask me why, but I feel as if this was all a set up to cover someone's ass. What do you think?" Again he waited for the Mountie to respond.

A deep sigh. "It is plausible, Ray..."

"Forget about it. The case is closed." A loud obnoxious voice broke through. "The Lt. just sent the papers to records. He wants your report on his desk by tonight, Stanley." Vecchio's smug look made Kowalski stand up to fight, only Fraser's arm stopped him. "What's the matter, Stanley, not getting any driving you to distraction?"

"Really Ray, such taunts are not necessary, not only that, they are also childish."

"Sometimes you have to talk childish in order for the feeble minded to understand. Why do you hang out with this loser any ways, Benny. Aren't I good enough for you, or is slumming making you feel morally superior more your game lately?"

"Ray, I do not see what my being partners with Detective Kowalski has any baring on us as friends. You know I would love to be your partner again, but the consulate believes my resources are better spent with my current one." So engrossed with his spat with Vecchio, he missed the hurt look that flitted over Kowalski's eyes. As fast as it came it was gone, and Ray was getting his coat.

"Ya know what Frase, I'm outta here. If you want to talk to the pig, then be my guest. Yo Frannie, tell the Lieu, I am headen home, he will get his damned report tomorrow." He called out as he stormed out of the station leaving stunned and smug people behind him.

****

Out on the sidewalk, Ray pulled the coat's collar up around his neck and shivered in the cold wet weather. 'May be Vecchio is right, may be I am a loser. I mean, look at me. My love life is nothing but a joke here lately. I lost my wife to the meatball head. My best and only friend would rather spend his time with the same noodle brain. I sit at home drinking every night jerking off to porn videos, dreaming it was my partner's hand instead of my own on my dick. How pathetic is that?'

Suddenly he stopped and looked around. For a moment he was completely lost. He recognized nothing and no one. Panic seized him and he flattened himself back against the brick wall of the brownstone behind him. Eyes wide with panic, he spread out his arms to balance as a wave of dizziness swept over him.

He was on his knees when a large hand settled on his shoulder. "Are you all right, son?"

Ray looked up in to the face of a well groomed man in his late sixties with gray hair and glasses. "I... I don't know. I just got dizzy, thas all. S'okay now."

The man shook out a handkerchief and handed it to him. "Here son, you are bleeding." Attentively he wiped at the blood running down Ray's face. When there was no more, he folded the cloth and placed it in a plastic bag, inside his coat. "There, all better. I think you had better call a cab, and get you home."

Ray stood with the man's assistance and nodded his acquiescence. "Yeah, a cab. Thanks." Still a little confused and dizzy he allowed the man to help him settle in the cab. Not knowing and not caring, he let the man give directions to his place and pay the driver. Quickly he fell asleep in the back of the cab. The next thing he knew he was being lead up the steps of his apartment building
by Fraser.

"Leave me the hell alone. I can manage just fine on my own." He yanked his arm from Fraser and headed up the rest of the way, ignoring a shocked Fraser. Stone faced, he stalked the halls of his building until he came to his door. Once inside the apartment he sat back against the door and let the tears fall. A while later, he slowly crawled to his bed and lay down on it.

He couldn't remember what happened this afternoon, only that Fraser was responsible for him feeling pain, yet again. Sighing he placed it at the door of another mental block because of too painful of an experience, like the moment Stell had told him she wanted a divorce. She still claimed he just stood there with a confounded expression on his face as she belittled him and threw her rings at him. All he remembered was Stell saying something about needing to talk, and later finding the rings at his feet. There was something else about that moment, but it was still elusive, something to do with warm red.

Ray let sleep claim him as the pain eased from behind his eyes. "Damn head aches." Muttered as he fell deep in to sleep, blissfully unaware of the Mountie standing at his door knocking.

****

Following morning, Ray awoke with a start. Something was off. Quickly he searched the apartment, but found nothing to cause his reaction. After a large cup of coffee and smarties, he walked out to his car, or where it should be. Cursing loudly he recalled a cab bringing him home last night and running in to Fraser. He pulled the coat closer on his lean body and walked to the station.

Late again, the Lieu was not happy today by the time he arrived. Vecchio was strutting around like a prized peacock as he smirked at Kowalski. "Have a late night with Rosie Palms, Stanley?"

"Up yers, garlic breath. Where is Fraser, he was supposed to be here already?"

"Oh, you haven't heard? Seems Fraser has requested a new partner. Until they pair him with me again, he is back to working at the consulate as a toy soldier for her majesty, the ice queen." His smirk grew wider. "What's the matter Kowalski, couldn't keep your queer hands to yourself?"

"Vecchio! My office now! Kowalski, I want that report by noon or don't bother showing up tomorrow."

"Ooo, sounds like you are screwed with Welsh, Stanley. Take my advice and forget about showing up tomorrow."

"Now Vecchio!"

"Coming Lt. This isn't over Stanley, I'll see you later."

"Count on it, ya hairless bastard." His vicious snarl caused the others around him to stop working. "What the hell you all looking at. Get back to fucking work." Inwardly he wondered if this day could get any worse, as he fell in to his chair and fell out as it came apart. The snorting laughter behind him let him know which Italian Fashion Victim had caused this. Muttering angrily he stood, gathering his wits and papers. 'Oh yes, you will pay for this Vecchio. You and your little Mountie too! Speak of the devil...' "What are you doing here, I thought you put in for a transfer of partners?"

"Now Ray, why would I do such a thing. We are partners and... Ray are you all right?"

Ray felt a strong pain shoot through his head as he wiped away blood from his nose. "Just fine Frase. Now help me get through with this report before the Lieu kills me."

"Now Ray, I do not think that Lt. Welsh would commit homicide over a report. That was humor Ray." Dead serious look. "Right then, let's get busy."

END PART 1