Ah! Bishonen-sama!

By Sephiroth

(a Gundam Wing/ Final Fantasy 7 crossover; an Ah! My Goddess fusion)

Rated NC-17

Ah! Bishonen-sama!

By Sephiroth

--part 1: Moonlight and Braids---

A slender hand picked up the safe-house telephone and placed it against an ear that was fringed with with hair the color of sunshine.

"Hello," a cheerful voice inquired from the pale lips of the hand's owner.

"Quatre, this is Relena. I was wondering if Heero had gotten my invitation. I know he always turns them down, but I do wish he'd attend at least once."

"He's not in at the moment, Relena," Quatre apologized. He had mixed feelings about the matter. Relena was annoying as hell and her actions had compromised a few of their missions. But those events had not been deliberate, just acts of stupidity. "I'll tell him you called, though."

"Thanks." Relena hung up.

Quatre put the phone down and checked the refrigerator. He frowned. They seriously needed to shop for food. But since he couldn't leave...

"I guess I'll have to order some take out." he decided. "I'll just have them bring it to the usual location."

He dialed the first number but was told he was too early for delivery service. The second try yielded a message that effectively said "sorry, we closed an hour ago." The next two tries resulted in no answer of any kind. Finally, frustrated (for even sweet-natured people with infinite patience and kind hearts get frustrated), he dialed one final number.

"Hello?" a familiar voice asked on the other end.

Quatre was far too annoyed to recognize it, however. "Hello, can you help me?"

"You've reached the Bishonen-God's Helpline." a voice told him. "I'll be stopping by to consult you on your wish."

"Huh?!" Quatre blinked. "Excuse me? Hello?"

"Hello!" The voice didn't come from the phone, but from behind Quatre, in the direction of the vanity mirror Duo had insisted on buying (so he could properly check out his braid.)

Quatre spun around in time to see Duo stepping out of the mirror. "What the...?!"

"I'm sorry if this alarms you, Quatre Raberba Winner," Duo smiled.

"You're a Bishonen-God?" Quatre asked, dubiously.

Duo nodded. "Yep. Cool, huh? So, what's your wish? Come on, you can have anything you want."

Quatre's eyes narrowed shrewdly. The guys had to be setting this up. This was a classic Duo prank, right? Though classic Duo pranks usually didn't involve Duo stepping out of mirrors. But if it was true, then...

"If you're for real about this then what I wish for most is..."

There was a pause while the world held it's breath, then Quatre broke the silence with a single word.

"...You!"

Duo smiled.

"But since you and the others are just pulling a prank on me, that'll never happen, right Duo?" Quatre nervously scratched the back of his head, then blinked and toppled back in amazement as Duo levitated halfway to the ceiling, and a beacon of blue light shot up from his body.

A moment later, Duo alit from mid-air and smiled, cheerfully, at Quatre. "I'm happy to inform you that your wish has been approved."

Quatre blinked. "Approved?!" He had wanted Duo for as long as he could remember, had dreamed of this moment. Was this really happening? Had his fondest dream come true?

"Yes, Quatre," Duo smiled, "now that our contract has been finalized you and I..."

"Duo," Quatre said as reality sank in, "Heero's not going to like this."

"Heero doesn't own me, Quatre," Duo said, pointedly. "I'll just tell him where we stand so he doesn't make a fool of himself over something he can't have."

"And just where *do* you stand?" Heero asked from the doorway behind them.

Quatre and Duo spun around to face Heero, who looked quite livid.

"Heero," Quatre stammered, "I... I can explain. I..."

"GET OUT!" Heero screamed at them, his voice burdened by anger and jealousy.

Quatre and Duo rushed out of the safehouse, figuring they'd return when Heero calmed down.

"It might take a few days," Duo told Quatre, "I'm sorry about that."

"It's okay," Quatre smiled. "we can just stay at my place until he calms down."

"Isn't your sister living there?" Duo asked, raising an eyebrow.

Quate sighed. "That's just my luck." he sighed, "I finally get a boyfriend and we're stuck living with my sister."

*****

-----part 2: Midsummer Night's Fantasy-----

Quatrina Winner smiled as the servants brought breakfast to the table for herself, Quatre, and Quatre's boyfriend.

"So, Duo," she asked, "ever been to the ocean? It's very nice."

"I bet it is." Duo nodded. "Father Maxwell wanted to take us, but he couldn't afford it."

Quatre frowned at this and Duo promised to explain about that matter after breakfast.

"You should take Duo." Quatrina told her little brother. "It'll be fun."

"Please?" Duo asked.

"All right," Quatre agreed.

"By the way," Quatrina told her brother, "you got a package today. I'm going to take Duo out shopping for a bit. You don't mind, do you?"

"No, go ahead," Quatre agreed, "it'll give you two a chance to get acquainted."

"We'll be back shortly." Duo promised, as he and Quatrina headed out to the shops.

"Well, I might as well see what's in the package." he decided. He found a pair of scissors and cut open the envelope. Inside was a PlayStation game:

Part 2

"That's new," Quatre smiled. "Well, while they're gone, I might as well check it out. But why the adult rating? Probably very violent, or shows nudity."

The credits page came up and Quatre hit the button for the game to begin.

A soft voice chuckled as a pair of glowing eyes opened, there on the screen. The camera angle zoomed out, slowly, until it revealed a silver-haired man standing there in a pair of tight, black leather pants.

Quatre had never played the original FFVII and had no clue who this guy was.

"Do you want to see something incredible?" the man on the screen asked.

Quatre nodded.

The man on screen smiled. "Well then," he said, "watch this."

Quatre watched, dumbfounded, as the man squeezed his legs *through* the screen and into Quatre's livingroom. The man's torso was next, along with a hand. The hand grasped the edge of the set and pulled, helping the man slide through the rest of the way. The sword he was carrying was the last thing through. Then the TV set faded back to normal.

"Hi!" the man grinned, performing a rather impressive katana.

Quatre stayed out of the man's way. "Um...."

"So, I hear you're going to take Duo to the ocean." the silver-haired man said. "You think you've finally got the nerve to make your move, hmm?"

"Who are you?" Quatre asked.

"I'm the Keeper of Love's Eternal Fire." the man smiled, as he advanced. "So, tell me. How are you gonna do it?"

"You've got the wrong idea." Quatre stammered.

"No, you do." the man informed him. "You should touch him, there," he grabbed Quatre's hand and placed it against his crotch, "by the ocean."

Quatre's nose began to bleed and he staggered back, pulling his hand free... just as the silver-haired man pounced on him.

"Then," the man said, seductively, "you take him in your arms, and go all the way!"

Quatre scrambled out from under the man who turned and gave him an exasperated look.

"How childish!" the man sounded annoyed. "No wonder you're not getting anywhere." his eyes narrowed. "Are you really serious about Duo?"

Quatre nodded.

"Then do something," the man implored. "He's waiting for you. Longing for you."

"Longing?" this brought fresh blood from his nostril. "Hey, wait a second. How do you know that?"

"I know everything." the man said as the sound of a door opening and the voices of Duo and Quatrina could be heard in the next room. "Damn, he's back. You just remember what I said this weekend and I'll back you up. And don't tell my little brother Duo, he can be vindictive."

"Little brother?" Quatre asked. "You mean you're Duo's....?"

"Big brother," the man replied as he vanished through the floor, "Sephiroth."

END PART 2