Title: Bad Boys

Author: Scorpio

Email: scorpio71@earthlink.net

Archive: If you want it...

Fandom: Herc/Xena

Pairing: Strife/Cupid

Rating: Don't know yet,... let's say between R and NC-17 to be safe, k?

Series: none

Disclaimer: not mine, no money

Warning: slash

Summary: Cupid's POV on his changing relationship with Strife...



Bad Boys...
by Scorpio


Mom says I got a thing for bad boys. ::shrugs:: Like she's one to talk. ::sarcastic snort:: I , like, soooo don't think she has any right to bitch and nag. At least not until she can explain her thing for Dad, you know? I mean, I love Pops and all, but puh-leese. Leather britches is such a classic bad boy. Hades in a hand basket, he's the God of bad boys!

Now she's hooked up with Heph. Tell me, is that any better than Ares?! I soooo don't think so. I mean, he's a paranoid loner with mildly psychotic tendencies whose favorite activity is to create bigger and better weapons of destruction !

Hello! If that's not having a thing for bad boys, I certainly don't know what is? ::shakes blonde head in mock sympathy::

What does she know anyway? ::looks at self in mirror to make sure he is still stunningly beautiful - smiles at breath-taking sexy image of self:: I'm the God of Love for Zeus sake. I love everyone !

Right?...

~~~

Look at him. Smiling. Laughing. Plotting. ::glares into scrying mirror::

It's totally not fair. I mean, why can't I go too? I'm not some young baby. I'm an adult. Hades in a flower garden, I'm older than him ! But nooOOOooo !

::pouts sexily making handsome chin quiver slightly::

Oh, don't get me wrong, Pops tried to be gentle and nice about it. Not that he succeeded. No Cupid, he said. It's too dangerous, he said. I'm gonna send in Strife, he said!

::stomps foot in frighteningly accurate imitation of blonde dizzy mother:: It's not fair ! I never get to do anything dangerous! I get all the sappy silly jobs. I never get to do anything... um,... er,... well, mean ! It's so not fair.

The only thing dangerous Pops let me be around is... well, Strife!

::glares at image of father and leather clad cousin::

I'll show them who's dangerous!

::disappears in cloud of sparkles and a shower of rose petals::

~~~

::smells scent of burning ozone and hears crackle of energy - swirls to see confused face of black studded leather clad cousin - ignores tightening in groin and shiver of mild fear up spine::

"Strife! What're you doing here?!"

::glances around temple nervously, noting all of the priceless statues and vases and suddenly realizes the great potential for destruction this visit can lead too::

Damn... He's smirking at me. And that gleam in his dark eyes. What's that all about? He never comes to my temples. He says all the white gives him a headache.

"Actually, I came here ta find out just what is was you were doing at Thebes? You know Unc told you ta stay the fuck away, that I gotta job ta do there. Yet, as soon as I pop inta the place all I can smell is... you ! Spill it Flyboy. Wha'cha do?"

::gulps loudly and looks around nervously for an escape - doesn't see one::

"What makes ya think I did anything?"

He's laughing at me! Well, giggling actually. What's so damn funny!?!

"What!?" ::bristles at imagined insult::

"Well,... the way I figure it. Ya either ratted us out... or you're a major busy-body like your Mom and just couldn't keep outta it, even after ya been told ta."

::blushes deeply - tries to will blush away - doesn't succeed::

Hades in a frying pan! He's laughing at me again ! How dare he! I'm just as important as he is, even if Pops don't see it that way!

::indignant anger and humiliation push the honest to Zeus truth out of mouth without engaging brain filters first::

"If you must know, I only went there to find out what was going on. I didn't go there to mess with your big plans . I mean, Zeus forbid I was actually in on it ! But hey, I don't know nothing about nothing! Right! So what if I hear Prince Impotence trashing your name and rep for his whole court to hear. So what if I took action against it and punished him for it. So what if I publicly defended your honor ! It doesn't matter since I'm not a fighter and I didn't actually kill him!"

::watches as condescending smirk melts into amazed shock::

"...you defended my name?..."

What's wrong with him? He acts like that's a surprise. What, nobody ever stood up for him before? ::runs cousin's life in fast-forward through mind and compares to own - feels surge of compassion::

"Yeah... I did."

"...wha'cha do ta him?..."

::smirks::

"I threw a spell on him. One of the meanest and nastiest ones I got."

::flushes with pleasure at the hungry and conspiratorial grin on leather clad cousin's pale face::

"What! Come on Flyboy! Give! I gotta know."

"Let's just say that he won't be such a ladies man anymore. I mean, his dick isn't good for anything but peeing outta. He couldn't even get it up for Mom now."

::watches cousin grab self and moan in mock sympathy before breaking out in delighted giggles::

"Oh, Cupie! You're bad !"

::grins silly grin at cousin::

~~

See, here's the thing. Strife was soooo impressed with the spell that I zapped Prince Impotence with that he decided that he was going to give me "official lessons in Mischief and Mayhem" as he so eloquently put it. This, of course, totally pissed off Mom and worried Pops no end. They are like, so over protective and it's a major drag.

Strife on the other hand, doesn't treat me like a fragile flower that will wilt at a moments notice. He's been dragging me all over Greece and we've had a blast creating all sorts of trouble. ::chuckles at memory flash::

Hades starched undies, he was soooo enthralled by what I did to the rude Prince that he wondered if I could do it in reverse. So, I said, yeah no problem. He said, prove it. So I did.

We found some wanna-be warrior wished-he-was-a bad-boy named Viagra who had been stupid enough to call me a wimpy momma's boy in Strife's hearing. Strife wanted to get revenge. So he tells me to zap this guy a killer 'oh gods I'm gonna die if I don't cum right now' hard-on. I thought it was a stupid punishment, but leather-boy just giggles and begs me to trust him. So I did what he asked. Then my tall wicked cousin zapped an invisible unbreakable band of energy around this Viagra guys cock and balls like a cock-ring.

::smirks:: It's been three days and Strife still hasn't let the poor schmuck cum yet. ::chuckles:: I think that tomorrow I'll go tell the poor guy that he's praying to the wrong God. I can't do anything for the sap. It's Strife's cock-ring he's wearing... not mine.

::shakes beautiful head to clear memory::

Still, as much fun as we've been having, Strife won't take me anywhere dangerous. Just normal type pranks and stuff. If it involves blood and killing, then he ditches me. Fast.

::pouts::

I was plenty pissed when I realized what he was doing. I figured that he thought that I was too afraid or something. He just gave me a sad look that almost broke my heart. Said that he knew that I had it in me to handle it. Said that he knew I wouldn't be afraid and that I'd be able to adjust to the death and killing easy. Too easy.

He said, he had so much blood on his hands that not even the River Styx could wash 'em clean and that he'd die a thousand deaths himself if it kept the blood off of my pure white wings. ::grins sappy love struck grin and sighs::

That was soooo romantic it took my breath away. And the pain and sadness in his eyes when he said that... such regret and loss. Then, he shuttered it away again, buried in deep inside. Hid it behind a grin and a shrug. But I know. I know it's there and I'd do anything to take that pain away. Erase it.

::sighs and grins sappy love struck grin again::

I love his laugh... his real one.

~~~

::pulls blanket up around shoulders of sleeping cousin and grabs bowl of bloody water and leaves bedroom::

I could hate Discord! Easily! And I am, like soooo pissed off at Pops. How could he let this happen?! And apparently, it's not the first time either.

See, Discord and Strife are constantly in a power struggle over which one of them is Pops second in command. Sometimes it's her. Sometimes it's Strife. Depends on who's in Pops favor at the time. But sometimes, he pits them against each other to see who comes out on top. Like now.

::gets rid of bloody water and begins to pace temple in agitation::

Strife won this time. Barely. He took a lot of damage in the fight though. See, he's by far the smarter and clever of the two. She's more mean and cruel. In Pops eyes, they each got sterling qualities and I'm sure he wishes that he could cram them into one being, but he can't... so this is his stupid solution.

::stomps foot and thrusts thick lower lip out in sexy pout::

Well, I'm not putting up with this. I'm gonna give Pops a piece of my mind!

~~~

AAAARRGHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

::throws vase against wall and watches it shatter into a hundred fragments::

Can you believe my Mom told me to stay away from Strife!!!!!!!!!!

Go find a nice boy to play with, she said. He's nothing but trouble in black leather, she said. He'll break your heart, she said.

Fuck that noise! I'll show her !

::disappears in cloud of sparkles and shower of rose petals::

~~~

::kisses startled cousin and grabs black leather covered cock::

"...mmmm.... ...oh... Cupie, what in Hades name has gotten inta you?"

"Shut the fuck up and nail me to your mattress Strife."

::banishes two sets of clothes with a thought and tumbles them both onto blood red satin sheets::

"What?!"

"Dammit Strife! Just shut up and fuck me already!"

::watches stunned expression melt into a erotic mixture of lust and adoration - feels surge of power followed by generous coating of oil dripping from ass::

"Oh Cupie..."

~~~

::stares down at trembling hands in a dazed and freaked out kind of shock::

Mom is soooo gonna kill me. She's gonna pluck the feathers outta my wings one by one. Then she's gonna roast me in lemon sauce.

::pales at another frightening thought::

Pops is gonna flip the fuck out! He's gonna slaughter mortals by the thousands before he gets over this one. He's gonna kill me. Right after he kills Strife.

Strife!!!!!!!!! ::grabs onto arms of chair to keep from fainting dead away::

~~~

::trembles as dark room slowly fades into view - stalls by brushing rose petals from shoulders - see's beloved and resists urge to vomit everywhere::

"Cupie! By Zeus! What's wrong? You look like ya just came from a visit ta Tartarus."

::swallows nervously and practically collapses into chair::

"Worse. I just came from a visit with Hera and Apollo."

::watches lovers natural nervous energy become still::

"Wha... why?"

::takes deep breath and plunges head first into story::

"Well, I wasn't feeling so well. I went to see Apollo to get his opinion about if it was serious or not. His son is always so busy that I didn't want to bother him over nothing. Well,... he checked me out and then called Hera to confirm his diagnosis."

::watches confused look cross beautiful pale features of love pillow::

"Why Hera? How could she help if you're ill?"

::feels heart begin to pound in chest::

"Cause I'm not really ill. I'm... I'm pregnant."

::watches lover blink twice and then faint dead away::

~~~

::gag - choke - spew ::

Oh. This sucks . This big time sucks. ::runs shaky hand through sweaty blonde hair:: I soooo do not like being pregnant so far. I mean, why call it "morning sickness" when it lasts all day?

::turns green - gag - vomit - gag - dry heave - cough::

Oh. this sucks .

~~~

::pacing length of main room of temple in the grip of major hormone induced mood swing::

How dare she! After all, what does Artemis know about anything! And she was soooo rude about it too. Temper temper, she said. Look at Mr Mood Swing, she said.

::stops pacing to kick at fallen throw pillow::

And Mom? ::rolls eyes:: Hades in a pink dress, she's an annoying pain. An embarrassing annoying pain.

I honestly don't think this... situation is something to get hysterical over. There is no need for mello drama , ya know? ::stomps foot and sticks out full bottom lip in a sexy pout:: I mean, do I look like a despoiled virgin to you? 'Cause that's how Mom is acting.

My poor sweet baby, she said. My little innocent dove, she cried. My Cupie, she wailed. ::rolls eyes and begins pacing again:: Then she started bitchin' about Strife. That beast, she said. That sneaky punk, she cried. Ares do something, she wailed. So,... he did.

::worried expression flickers across beautiful face as teeth nibble bottom lip::

Pops went ballistic. I mean, his eyes are normally so dark as to be black, but, I swear to Zeus, they turned blood red! He yelled at Strife so loudly that his temple actually shook . The air literally crackled with his anger.

::sarcastic snort:: Boy was Grandma surprised! I mean, Hera wanted to upset Mom, but I don't think she realized that Pops would go insane. Hades on a pogo stick, was she ever wrong.

I'm gonna mangle him, he growled. I'm gonna mutilate him, he yelled. I'm gonna murder him, he bellowed. ::winces at memory of terrified expression on leather clad lovers face:: Strife just disappeared in a shower of sparkles, but Pops, he went after Strife with a flash of energy so big it singed everyone left in the temple.

::curls up on velvet divan and sighs::

Hopefully Strife can find a safe place to hide while Pops calms down. Grandma promised she would talk to him as soon as his sanity returned.

::looks thoughtful:: Ya know, I've never been around Pops when he "sees red" before. ::shudders::

Please Strife, please still be alive...

~~~

"Ow ow ow ow!"

"Sorry love. Sorry."

::wrings out cloth in bowl of warm soapy water::

"I'm almost done washing you off. Apollo said that I would only have to apply this ointment three more times."

"Good. I hate feeling useless and besides, you got enough ta worry about without havein' ta take care of a invalid too."

::flinches at depressed tone in lovers voice - continues to gently bathe lovers healing wounds::

Oh, my gentle love. My sweet precious Strife. I'm soooo sorry, so so sorry. This should have never happened to you.

If only Pops didn't see me as a weak fragile child who can't take care of himself. If only Mom didn't try to control my life by choosing my lovers for me. If only Grandma had caught up to Pops before he caught up to you. If only I never seduced you. ::stops - blinks:: Erase that last thought. I'm glad I seduced you. I just wish that everyone didn't think it was the other way around.

I mean, everyone just assumed that you tricked me into your bed. ::rolls eyes:: Hello! God of Love here! I don't get seduced, I do the seducing. I mean, duh!

::banishes soapy water and clothe - opens jar of ointment::

"Okay babe. I'm gonna put on this... ::sniffs at yellow goo in jar:: ...lemon stuff Apollo left onto your back."

::scoops out some yellow goo and carefully smears on beloved's injuries::

"Ow ow ow ow!"

"Sorry love. Sorry."
~~~
Mmmm... he's still asleep. ::cuddles closer to warm snoring love pillow:: He's soooo beautiful when he's sleeping. It's as if all the stress and frustration can't touch him when he's in my bed.

::smiles:: At least Pops forgave him,... us. I guess that someone finally got brave enough to suggest that I wasn't exactly a virgin as well as point out that Strife and me are in honest to Zeus love. ::sends out quick prayer of thanks to Aunt Hestia::

It took some fancy talking and a lot of pouting, but by the time Strife's injuries had healed, Pops was able to deal with it calmly. Strife's back to work and Pops is even starting to look forward to being a Grandpa.

::pulls snoring and drooling Mischief God closer::

Of course, now I gotta figure out how to tell Strife about Grandma's dictate. ::rolls eyes:: Hera sure can drive a hard bargain. Can you believe that she made me promise to a whole list of things before she would intercede with Pops on Strife's behalf? I mean, it was like, Pops flipped, Strife bugged, Mom cried, Grandma haggled, and me?... I caved.

::sighs:: So now I gotta figure out how to tell Strife what I agreed to. ::nervously nibbles on full bottom lip:: Oh... maybe tonight. After dinner. After sex . ::grins:: I'll throw it at him right after I fuck him stupid. He's always more agreeable when he's "cum dumb". ::leers at thought of sexy lover all aroused and wanting hot sloppy sex::
~~~
::breaks off kiss to gasp for air::

Where in the name of... me did he learn to kiss like that? ::giggles:: Guess I answered my own question, huh?

::grabs two fist fulls of spiky brown hair and pulls beloveds lips back in for another heart pounding kiss::

Wet. Hot. Mmmm... tastes like ambrosia. Oooo yeah. Grab me. Squeeze me. ::whimper - moan::

"Strife. Love. Naked. Now."

::clothes disappear in flash of light::

Hades in a rowboat, he's beautiful. I was amazed the first time I saw him without all that kinky black leather. Just pure unadulterated Strife. ::throbbing cock twitches as memory merges with reality:: Long lean battle hardened muscles covered with soft pale skin. ::licks full sensuous lips:: Delicious...

::grabs boy toy - throws on large bed - dives on top::

"Ooof!"

::flashes lust filled leer at breathless lover::

"Um,... Cupie? Uh... maybe we should be,... er,... careful."

::raises one eloquent eyebrow in question::

"Uh,... so we don't, ya know, hurt the baby."

::rolls eyes and groans::

"Strife love. I'm not fragile. I won't break. Honest. Now, shut up and fuck me!"

~~~

"WHAT!?!?"

::cringes:: Maybe we should've had sex three times 'cause he ain't taken this too well.

"Look love. I only promised Grandma that I'd ask you to marry me. She's the one that promised Pops that you would say yes!"

"but... but... but..."

::watches lover begin to babble as panic sets in::

Hades in a blonde wig, did I break him?

"I know it's all kinda sudden, but, if you want, we can just have a real simple ceremony. We don't have ta invite any mortals if you don't want. Of course, we'll have ta tell Mom right away. She's been consoling herself by making plans for a huge wedding... and I think Pops said something about holding it at his main temple in Corinth. Something about marking the occasion with a battle at the city gates."

"but... but... but..."

Oh damn. I did break him... ::sighs::

"Strife. Love. Say something ! What do you think?"

::watches intently as dazed lover blinks rapidly::

"I... I... I think I need ta get out of here!"

::naked cum smeared betrothed disappears in a shower of sparkles::

Oh. My. God. I've been dumped !

~~~

::glares at smirking step-father::

"I am soooo not having a mood swing!"

"Of course not."

What I ask you, is so funny. Heph is, like, practically bursting into giggles here. At Me! this is soooo unfair. I don't think this is funny. I think it sucks ! I have every right to be in a pissy mood. I've been... ::sob:: dumped ! Me! The God of Love for Zeus sakes!

::dips dill pickle into jar of heavy cream::

"Ewww!"

::munch - crunch - swallow::

"What?"

::looks at sputtering Fire God in confusion::

"That! What you're eating,... it's nasty !"

::glances at remainder of pickle in hand::

What? He's a food critic now? And he thinks I've gone around the bend... ::snort::

"And this is gross why?"

::grins at appalled look on step-fathers face::

"Just trust me Cupid. It's gross and nasty and vile. The only reason that you like it is because you're obviously suffering from wacky food cravings."

::sticks out full bottom lip in irresistibly sexy pout - watches Fire God squirm::

"I am so not having food cravings . Get real."

::dips dill pickle back into jar of heavy cream::

Men are such... pigs ! All of them. The whole stinking lot. I mean, is there a single man out there who isn't commitment-phobic? Anywhere? Take Pops,... he had a blast with his fling with Mom, but he wasn't willing to do the "long haul", even for Me ! And Heph, he did the marriage thing,... but where does he spend 90% of his time? Lemnos! Let's not even discuss Zeus! He'd cheat on Grandma with anyone ... or anything. ::shudders:: Men are such... pigs !

::bites into pickle as if it were an effigy of Strife's dangly bits::

First that leather clad punk knocks me up and then he just... leaves ! How could he walk away? Didn't he know that I love him? Didn't he know that I want to be with him? Doesn't he miss me?

::tries to muffle sudden sob and banish tears from eyes - doesn't succeed::

"Why?..."

"Huh?"

::looks into confused eyes of step-father::

"Why'd he leave me? Why? I... I... I miss him, you know. I... I want him back !"

::big luminous eyes fill with tears - handsome chin begins to quiver::

"So... Go on and get him. Don't wait for him to admit he's being an ass. You'll be here until Tartarus freezes over if you do. Don't ask , tell him to get his skinny butt back where it belongs!"

::blinks startled eyes at step-father - marvels at Fire Gods vast wisdom::

"Yeah!"

::disappears in cloud of rose petals and shower of sparkles::

~~~

Ahhhh. There he is. ::snorts:: It figures. So, he thinks he can hide from me in the middle of a battle? Well, guess he's got another thing coming.

::stomps around fighting warriors to the Mischief God's side with sexy scowl of displeasure on face::

"STRIFE!"

::watches beloved fool blink at him in confusion::

"Cupie! What are you doing here? Ya gotta leave before Unc finds out. He'll go looney-tunes if he caught you in the middle of a war in your condition!"

::glares at blood smeared leather clad betrothed::

"And what condition is that? Abandoned!?!? I soooo don't think so. I'm not going anywhere until you tell me why !"

"Why?... Why what?"

I swear, if I knew how to kill, I'd practice on him. Right about now! Men!

"WHY!!!!! How about why you abandoned me and our unborn child you idiot!"

I can not believe he is so dense . What did he think I meant? Like, duh ! Does mass carnage always make him stupid?

"Excuse me? Lord Strife?... Did he just say that you two are having a child ?"

::turns to glare at mortal warriors and notices that the fighting around them has stopped as the warriors are more interested in watching them argue::

"Um... Yeah. Cupid is... ah... I mean, it's that he's..."

::sighs sigh of the long suffering::

"What idiot here means is that I'm pregnant, it's his fault, and that he left me !"

Oh. My. God. They're laughing ! At Me!!!! They think this is funny ! They think I'm some sorta joke ?! ::grits teeth together:: I'll show 'em just how damn funny I can be! Let them laugh at this !

::reaches out and pulls enchanted Bow out of thin air - loads special double dipped arrow - aims - fires - repeats::

Ha! That'll teach 'em to mess with the God of Love!

"Um... Cupie? Those two were mortal enemies ! They're supposed to be killin' each other with weapons, not trying to fuck each other to death!"

::watches with satisfaction as remaining warriors run off in screaming panic::

I am soooo evil . ::chuckles:: Now,... one more idiot to deal with.

"Strife! Get back to my temple on Olympus! Get Naked! And. Get. In. Bed. You have soooo much to answer for!"

::watches lovers face turn to stunned panic::

"NOW!!!!"

::smirks as lover disappears in shower of sparkles::
~~~
Oh. Purrrr... ::tips head to side allowing sweaty cum soaked lover to nibble on throat:: Oh, I missed this. I was definitely made to be adored and pampered. ::tangles long fingers into wild dark hair - pulls beloved in for sloppy wet kiss:: Oooo... Mmmm...

Oh, Hades in a haystack, that feels good ! That's it love... Pet me! Stroke me! Oooo...

::turns heavy lidded gaze towards betrothed - notes mixture of sadness and fascination in big dark eyes::

"What love?"

"Um..."

::pale hand caresses golden tummy::

"Strife?..."

Why is he so sad? He's, like, giving off major vibes and they all scream regret. ::feels tinge of panic:: Is he sorry that he came back?!?!

"Cupie... Ah, you're... ya know, showing ."

::blinks rapidly at Mischief God in confusion at bizarre non sequitur::

"Huh?"

He's soooo cute when he rolls his eyes like that. ::giggles:: Kinda like Pops.

"I mean, you're showing . Ya know, the whole preggers thing? ::pale hand gently rubs golden tummy again:: "Well, it shows now ."

"And this is a bad thing why?"

::watches lover attempt casual indifference and fail miserably::

"Well,... Uh... The last time I saw ya? That night when ya told me what Hera did? And you were tellin' me how everyone was plannin' out our wedding? Well,... ya weren't showing then . I,... I missed it."

::blinks:: He admitted it! He not only knows he was wrong, he regrets it. Part of me soooo wants to gloat and rub his nose in it. Badly. ::sighs and hugs lover tighter:: But I won't. He's so sad and lost already. When he left, he hurt himself as much as he hurt me .

"Why love? Why'd you just... leave ?"

"...iwskrd..."

::stifles grin at embarrassed mumble::

"Come again,... in Greek this time."

Oh, he is soooo cute when he scowls.

"I was... scared. Okay? Happy now?"

::blinks:: He was scared ! Of what ? I mean, he is a God ! And one who cheerfully follows Pops into some of the most hair-raising and soul chilling blood-baths the world has ever seen on a fairly regular basis. What does he have to be scared of? Me? I soooo don't think so.

"Strife. That's just silly. What could be so scary about me ? I mean... nobody, and I do mean nobody is afraid of me ! As Mom says,... I'm mostly harmless!"

::watches as lovers one eyebrow arches up in smirk::

"No Cupie,... not you ... sorta."

There it is again. That look . I don't like that look on his face. It's almost... haunted . What in Tartarus could have put such hurt in him? How can I kiss that kind of pain away? ::sighs::

"It's just... everything good in my life gets... ripped away from me, ya know? I mean, my life ain't exactly a bunch o roses and sunshine. Then, suddenly, there ya were, practically handin' everything I ever wanted ta me on a silver platter."

Ah oh. I think I see where this is going. Oh my poor sweet love. You suffer...

"So... I, well,... I freaked. Okay? I mean, how would you feel? I just panicked. I guess I figured that if I refused ta take what you were offering me then no one could take it away from me. Stupid, huh?..."

::grabs sexy and hurting lover tightly to bronze chest::

"No love, not stupid. Just... startling. I didn't understand. Now I do."

::pulls back to glare in betrothed's eyes::

"Listen to me good. NO ONE will ever take you from me! NO ONE will take our child from us ! If someone tries and we can't effectively deal with them ourselves,... we'll... we'll... We'll turn Grandma loose on 'em and let her take her frustrations with the old goat out on 'em."

::Grins at thought of rampaging Hera defending him and Strife::

"Oooo Cupie! You're soooo evil !"

::chuckles::

~~~

AAAUUUUGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I could almost hate Mom! I swear, she's more crazy then,... then... then Pops ! What, I ask you, is she thinking ? ::rolls eyes and begins pacing temple:: I can't believe she honest to Zeus thinks that she did a good job of writing up the wedding invitation list! I mean, the only one who agreed with her is Pops, and that's because he likes the idea of a good fight to celebrate a wedding. Duh!

As if Pops gloating over the invitation list isn't a major clue I don't know what is. Okay, so Strife and I agreed to let Pops hold the ceremony in his temple in Corinth, right? So, how does that suggest to her that Julius Caesar would be perfect to invite? Pops wanted a battle at the city gates to commemorate the occasion, well, that will certainly do it. ::waves hands through air in wild irritation::

And Joxer ! Easily half the pantheon has claimed him for their own. ::shakes head sadly at fate of confused insane little mortal:: No wonder the man was a walking disaster area. Every time he turned around twice some Olympian or another was throwing some spell on him. If he showed up, half of the family would start brawling over him then and there. ::thoughtful pout crosses sexy face:: I guess that's why Pops wanted his invitation to be engraved in gold-leaf.

And Hercules!!!! I mean, I love the big guy. He is my favorite uncle and all, but damn it, I want Strife to pay attention to me at the wedding! Not on how to kill a Demi-God without Zeus figuring out who did it! ::kicks red satin throw pillow::

What I want to know is, just who the genius was that put Mom in charge of the guest list! Were they insane ?

::shower of hearts and roses followed quickly by grinning Love Goddess::

Mom?!?! Oh no...

"Cupie!" ::delighted squeal of giggling blonde Goddess:: "We can't forget Alcemene! We have to invite her too! See, I've added her name to the list."

::goes pale at thought of Grandma's reaction to that bit of news::

"MoooOOOooommmmmm!!!!!!!!!"

~~~

::fiddles nervously with golden music stand::

What could be taking so long ? It feels like they've been in there forever. ::nibbles bottom lip as brows crease with growing worry:: I mean, he didn't look that bad and it seemed to go faster the last time Apollo had to heal him. It was like, a quick zap of energy and "Here Cupe. Spread this stuff on his back when you change the bandages." No prob. Right?

::begins to pace main atrium of Sun God's Temple::

Strife is tough. Real tough. Right? He can take it, can't he? I mean,... he'll be okay. ::sobs:: Please let him be okay!

I am soooo mad a Pops for what he did to Strife. ::sighs as big beautiful eyes fill with tears:: But I'm not too surprised. After all, Pops is the God of War and Violence, so that doesn't exactly lend him to talking things out. He's like, the original "kill first, ask questions later" guy.

::trembles from wave of guilt::

As mad as I am at Pops, I can't really blame him for this. I mean, aggression is just so him, ya know? No, this isn't Ares fault. It's mine ! ::tear escapes one big green eye to caress smooth golden cheek::

If only I hadn't gone to that stupid battlefield to freak out on Strife! If only I had waited until after he was home! If only those idiot soldiers hadn't told Pops that Strife was dissin' me!

::eyes glaze over as mind jumps from "my fault" to "their fault" - mood swing shifts from guilt to anger::

Why, those low down dirty dogs! How dare they betray Strife like that! How dare they presume to interfere with my love life! I'll show them!!!!

::disappears in shower of rose petals and silver sparkles::
~~~
::materializes in meeting room in Spartan Temple of War::

"All right Pops! Which one of these... pigs snitched on Strife? ::points to large table where several warriors and Generals are seated around open map::

"Cupid, calm down. I only pounded the snot out of Strife 'cause he left you! NO ONE does that to my boy and gets away with it. The only people allowed to fuck with your head are me and your mother."

::stomps foot in excellent imitation of blonde mother while whining::

"But DaaaAAAaaadddd!!!!!!!!!!! I already punished him!"

::watches dark father smirk in amusement::

"Oh? And just how did you punish Strife?"

::leers::

"Well... First I chained him to my bed and then I spanked him till he came."

"Kinky. However, I think my punishment was more... appropriate."

::turns to glare at snickering warriors::

"Pops! Which one told! I want to punish him for ratting out Strife!"

::watches big smelly muscle bound block-head stand up and smirk::

"It was me . What are you going to do about it? Spank me? Hey, I'd probably enjoy that my little Love God."

::glares at smug warrior and his snickering companions::

"Ya know, I may be the God of Love, but everyone always tends to forget that I'm also the Child of War !"

::waves long fingered hand in a graceful arc as a Battle Mare in full bridle and gear materializes in a shower of rose petals::

"Hey! My horse !"

::reaches into air and summons enchanted Bow - loads arrow - aims - fires::

"Oooo... My horse! Here girl... come to poppa!"

::glares at suddenly silent groups of most definitely not snickering warriors::

"Anyone else want to bad mouth me or my beloved?"

::all heads shake NO::

"Good."

::turns and flashes sexiest grin at War God::

"Later Pops!"

::disappears in a shower of rose petals and silver sparkles::

~~~

Oooo... Aaahhh... Yes, yes, yes. Oh that feels good . Mmmm... Oh love yes.

"Lower babe."

::pant - pant::

"Harder love, harder. Oooo... yes. There, there! Oooo..."

::moans at exquisite pleasure running up and down spine::

"You like that Cupie?"

::turns heavy lidded gaze at lover::

"Oh yes I do. You totally give the best back rubs."

::grins at dark cousin's giggle::

"I asked your Mom what I could do ta make the back-aches go away. I mean, she did the whole preggers thing too, so I figured she might know."

::raises one eyebrow in question while rubbing expanding tummy gently::

"What did she say?"

"She laughed in my face an told me ta practice my massage technique. ::shrugs:: So I am."

::rolls eyes:: That is so like Mom. She's sooo helpful, not! ::sighs in relief as another knot is worked out of lower back:: Then again... thanks Mom. This does feel great.

I mean, I never realized how much pressure a baby puts on your body. Mostly, it's not too bad, but sometimes... ::snorts:: it's soooo not fun. Like when the baby decides to sit on my bladder? Think about it, you'd be cranky too!

::yawns:: I wonder if Strife'll mind if I just take a little nap? ::stretches out a bit and then snuggles down:: Oh... that back rub feels so good and way relaxing... ::snore::

"Ya know, I've been thinking about what I want for our wedding, just like you said."

::start - snort - wakes up::

"Huh? Oh... Oh yeah. What?"

"I want a virgin sacrifice."

"WHAT!?!?"

~~~

Oh, my lover is such a thoughtful sweetheart. He'd maim anyone stupid enough to actually tell him that, but it's true none the less. I mean, clueless insensitive men simply DO NOT build their fat pregnant grumpy lovers a jacuzzi hot tub, do they?

::glances at quickly stripping Mischief God thoughtfully::

I wonder if somebody suggested it to him or if he thought of it all on his own?

::shrugs::

Either way... ::slowly sinks into hot bubbling water:: Aaaahhh!!! This is wonderful !

Oh my! The heat feels exquisite on my sore muscles. I think I'll live in this thing for the next few months. After all, weightlessness is beginning to sound like a great idea. Do you have any idea how hard it is to fly when your all sorts of pregnant?

::turns to look at lover and notes thin flat well muscled belly - feels tinge of envy::

Just look at him! He's so sexy and thin and flexible and thin and mobile and thin... Me? I'm fat and getting fatter. Water retention and back-aches are my world. ::sighs:: It's soooo not fair.

::thrusts foot onto dripping wet lovers lap - thrusts out lower lip in sexy pout - quivers chin::

"Look! My ankles are swollen. ::makes tears well up in big green eyes:: Rub them for me?..."

He better not even argue with me!!! After all, this is all his fault! I wouldn't be suffering from any of this crap if he had been able to keep it in his pants! ::firmly ignores little voice in back of head reminding him that he was the one to seduce Strife:: If he thinks he can just sit there all muscled and slim and not pregnant while here I am fat and swollen and most definitely not having mood swings, well then he's got another thing coming!

He just gets to hang out and look at me all gooey eyed while I'm the one with the squashed bladder and the back-aches and the weird ass dreams. All he has to do is be all smug and...

::feels light flutter of movement under skin of tummy - feels goofy grin split face in half::

"Strife! Lover! The baby! It kicked ! I felt it."

::watches silly smile erupt across love pillows face::

"Come 'ere! Ya gotta feel this. ::grabs pale hand of personal stud-muffin and places it on rounded tummy:: Here. Right here."

::moment of strained silence followed by another fluttery movement::

"Hades eatin' a cow-pie sandwich! I felt it! ::God of Mischief beams with pride:: That's my baby that just did that."

::too busy melting into pile of goo to take any of the credit, Love God just nods head like silly fool that he is::

"Yeah."
~~~
"Strife!"

::turns to watch lover materialize in shower of crackling sparks::

"Whaa-at!!!! I'm working here. I gotta whole bunch a rumors and bad feelin's ta spread around Sparta. Unc wants 'em all fired up so that they'll be willing ta march on Athens. After that I gotta..."

::raises one eyebrow while interrupting exasperated lover::

"Athens? What'd ol' iron britches do this time?"

::smiles at betrothed's giggle::

"She put skylights in the shape a owls in the ceilings of all a Unc's temples. He is so not amused."

::materializes pile of pillows to better be able to collapse in hysterical laughter::

Oh. My. God. Pops must have steam coming outta his ears over that one. Mr. Dark and Gloomy himself having to deal with sunlight even while indoors! Hades in a trash-heap, I wish I could've seen the look on Pops face when she pulled that little maneuver!

::slowly pulls self back together::

"So... wha'cha want?"

::blinks rapidly to remember what he was doing::

"Oh! Um,... I was trying to decorate the nursery and I wanted your opinion on what theme I should use."

::Gestures around white empty room::

"Oh, that's easy. Black... er,... with red trim."

::scowls at obviously insane lover::

I soooo don't THINK so.

"Strife you idiot. This is a nursery not a temple to Pops. I'm not doing it up in black ! Pick a baby color!"

::watches lovers screw up face in attempt to think - feels heart melt at the sight::

"Ya went ta go see Hera today, right?"

::nods head::

What's that got to do with the price of condoms?

"Um... did she say if it's goin' ta be a boy or a girl?"

::nods head again::

He thinks this is relevant why? ::eyes open wide as light bulb goes on over lovely blonde head:: Oh, I get it now. He wants to do the old boy equals blue and girl equals pink thingy. ::flashes lover wicked grin:: Well, I guess it's time to screw with his head again.

"Yeah. She did and the answer is yes."

"Huh?"

::melts at totally confused expression on beautiful face of betrothed::

"Duh! One of each. A girl and a boy."

"...twins?..."

Did he squeak ? 'Cause he sounded amazingly like Joxer for a minute there.

"Well yeah , I mean, it's not so surprising, now is it? After all, your Mom is a twin and Pops is a twin, so it only stands to reason that we'd have twins and..."

::falls silent as lover faints and crashes to the floor::

..o0O0o...

::looks around Corinth's Temple to War and shudders::

I'm supposed ta get married in this place? I mean, whose brilliant idea was it to hold the God of Love's wedding in a building that can best be described as War? Don't get me wrong... I, like, love my Pops and all, but... Pul-leese! ::rolls eyes:: Can someone just tell me who decorated this place? This whole "everything must be either a shade of black or made out of steel" has got to go. ::tries to imagine the ceremony in that dark and depressing Throne Room:: That's it ! I'm redecorating!

::turns in slow circle with serious look on lovely face::

Hmmm... I'll leave the stone walls black. Pops head would explode if he showed up in Corinth only to find his Temple had suddenly turned... say, pink? ::grins at imagery:: Naw... I'll just fix the frieze carvings. I mean,... the work was done wonderfully, but instead of all the men waving swords and axes at each other, I'll just have them wave... um,... ::snaps fingers and blinks through sudden flash of light:: sex toys at each other. ::glances at carvings on walls and smiles:: Nothing like an army of nipple clamp wearing dildo waving men to brighten a Love God's day.

Now the drapes... ::squints beautiful green eyes while looking at the yards of material hanging along the back wall of the Temple:: I like the crushed velvet, but... black ? I soooo don't think so. Let's try... ::waves hand again and watches silver sparkles and rose petals fly across room to wash over material:: red. Nice bright red. ::considers change while sticking the tip of his tongue out the corner of his lovely full lipped mouth:: Pops shouldn't mind too much. I'll just tell him that it looks like a waterfall of blood. He'll cave in at that point.

::turns to face the back of room:: Hmmm... maybe some gold pots with red rose bushes growing in them? ::waves hand towards back of room and watches four rose bushes pop into existence:: And the torches... I think white candles would be so much better... ::snaps fingers and several bright flashes race along wall transforming rough torches into hand-dipped candles:: That's a start...

::loud crackling energy of materializing father catches attention of redecorating Love God::

"Oh. Hey Pops. What's up?"

::watches War God open mouth to talk, only to stop and stare dumbfounded around Temple::

"What in the name of Hades black silk underwear to you think you're doing to my Temple?!?!"

::throws most dangerous weapon at War God - sad eyed, quivering chin, hopeful expression on beautiful face - followed by second most dangerous weapon::

"Daddy?..."

::watches War God melt at the word daddy and rushes on to push his ideas during the rare moment of weakness::

"See... I just wanted a little color for the wedding you are throwing me. Um... just a little decorating... honest ::flashes most sincere, if fake, smile:: Blood red curtains, flowers with thorns,... um... and maybe gold benches for the witnesses to sit on?... ::lovely face melts back into sad eyed hopeful look:: Please, Daddy. Please..."

::watches as War God looks around, cringes, sighs and then throws up hands in defeat:: Yes! Bagged 'em! Pops is soooo easy!

"Oh. I wanted to talk to you about the wedding anyway."

::raises eyebrow at War God while silently wondering what new crisis his father would create this time::

"STRIFE!"

::turns to watch lover appear in a shower of sparkles::

"Ya bellowed Unc? ::blinks and smiles:: Oh hey Cupie... Wondered where ya were."

::feels heart melt into gooey puddle as betrothed walks over and gives luscious mind bending kiss::

"Mmmm... lover. So, how are you and my babies?"

::leans forward for another sinful kiss::

"Hey! Stop it you two. Save that for later when... ::breaks off as mind catches up to ears:: Babies? As in more than one ?"

::grins at pole-axed expression on War God's face::

"Yep! Twins,... just like you and Aunt Eris. One boy and one girl. ::flashes smile full of even white teeth:: As close as Grandma can determine, one will be dedicated to the House of War, just like you and Strife. And the other will be dedicated to the House of Love, like me and Mom. She just doesn't know which is which yet."

::watches father break out into a big cheesy grin::

Look at the expression on Pops face. You'd think that he planned this himself. ::grins:: Well,... I did just promise him another heir... so I guess he has a right to be excited. Still... time to get this show on the road. I need to know what he plans for my wedding so that I can take steps to... fix it.

"Uh... you wanted to tell us about your idea for our wedding..."

::watches War God shake his head and snap out of visions of the future with his warrior grand-baby and focus on the present::

"Yeah. I'm thinking, Honor Guard."

A what? Why?... and for Who?

"Huh?"

::watches father roll eyes and resists urge to do the same::

"You're my son. I'm throwing you the wedding of the century. Hence, you need an Honor Guard to walk you to the alter. Since I'm the God of War... it should be the greatest warrior in the country."

::blinks:: Ooooo-kkaaaayyy. This isn't too bad. And knowing Pops, it coulda been a lot worse. Soooo... he wants me to have a proper escort up the aisle. Fair enough, but a warrior ? Hello! I'm the God of LOVE! ::light bulb goes on over head as pregnant blonde has epiphany::

"Sure Pops! Great idea. Greatest warrior in all of Corinth... that would be... ::snaps fingers and mortal appears in flash of light:: Iphicles."

::all eyes swivel to take in the sight of the heavily muscled king dressed in the leather and bronze armor and wearing the gold Crown of Corinth who was trying to push down his shock and indignation at being summoned::

"Um... Cupie? I think ya got it wrong... Unc said he wanted the greatest warrior in Corinth ta be your Honor Guard,... not the King ."

::glares at lover only to be startled by the harsh laughter of the Corinthian King::

"Lord Strife,... The God of Love is right. I am the best warrior in Corinth. I command the biggest, strongest, best trained and best equipped army in all of Greece with the exception of Divine Ares himself. And in every war that Corinth has fought has seen me personally on the front lines battling my enemies. Don't let this ::points to crown on lovely head:: blind you to this ::knocks knuckles against bronze breast plate of armor:: and we'll get along just fine."

Oh my... don't let Strife zap the King into dust! ::cringes as he waits for lover to blast the mortal when fathers unexpected laughter releases tension from air::

"Ballsy and beautiful... a deadly and dangerous combination."

::watches King of Corinth turn to get first look at God of War - turn pale - flush red - turn pale again - and fall hopelessly and madly in love::

Hehehehe... Sometimes I'm so good at this love gig that I even impress myself. ::smirks:: I give it three... maybe four days and Pops will be singing the same tune.

"Come on then your Majesty... let's discuss this duty of yours to act as my son's Honor Guard during his wedding."

::watches intrigued and aroused War God reach out and pull Iphicles against his beautiful leather clad chest and then disappear in a shower of red sparkles::

I am soooo good. I should get an award for that. Oooo I can't wait to tell Mom. She'll be soooo jealous that she didn't set that pair up together first. Ha! She'll chew on her liver for a whole month.

"You and your match-making... I don't know why you do that."

::turns to grin at lover::

"Duh! Love God here... or did you forget."

::watches lust filled leer erupt on betrothed's handsome face and wicked glint twinkle in lovely dark eyes::

"Why don'cha come on home and remind me?"

::leers::

"Race ya ta the bedroom. First one naked gets ta be on top!"

::disappears in flash of silver sparkles and rose petals::
~~~
Oh. My. God. What was that ?!?!? ::drops silver fork onto porcelain plate and watches black leather clad lover look up in startlement at the loud clatter::

"Cupie?..."

"Um..."

Not very brilliant or eloquent, I know... but I'm not even sure if what I think is happening is really happening, you know? I mean... how can you tell these things, anyway?

::painfully excruciating squeeze of muscle contractions that cut off all blood circulation while activating all pain nerve centers:: Ooooo FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That hurt ! ::feels face go very pale and then flush bright red::

"...Cupie?"

::looks at slightly scared expression on beautiful lovers face - forces a weak grin::

"Lover? I think it's time."

"Time?..."

Duh! Where is his head? What does he think I mean?

"The twins... you know? Time!"

::watches lover's pale face go even paler right before he tips back his lovely head and scream for all he's worth::

"AUNT DITE!!!!!!! GRANDMA!!!!!! IT'S TIME!!!!!!!!!"

~~~

Oh Hades in a hoop-skirt, this is taking forever ! And it's NOT fun at all! I just want it to be over already so I can just please pass out in a quiet corner somewhere nice and dark.

I mean, of course Grandma's officiating the big event. She's the only one who could . I mean, any God can get pregnant, but it takes the most powerful spell of the Goddess of Childbirth herself to create the temporary birth canal to actually deliver the child. And Mom is acting as her official Assistant and Nurse. Don't let anyone fool you into thinking Mom never gets her hands dirty... she can and she does.

But all of that is really besides the point... the point being that I'm in pain , I'm tired and I just want this to be over so I can sleep ! ::flinches as another strong contraction hits with a vengeance::

"Push!"

::squishes up face and pushes for all he's worth::

Hurts! Hurts! Hurts! Out! Get it OUT! ::is giddy with relief when contraction passes and comes close to swooning::

"You're doing great babe! Honest! This is like so cool and all..."

::turns to glare at betrothed with green laser beam eyes::

"This is all YOUR fault you... you... you... Prick!" ::watches lovers startled expression as he blinks and tries to understand where the insults and anger are coming from:: "You overgrown! leather clad! dick waving! Pervert !"

::groans loudly in pain as another strong contraction hits and idly wonders if insides are being torn in half::

"Push! That's it Cupid! Push! The baby is crowning! I can see the head! Push!"

I'm gonna die! Nothing can hurt this much and NOT kill you! Oh. My. God!!!!!!!!!!!!

::bright white pain gives way to intense feeling of release and wet slippery feel of baby sliding out of birth canal::

"It's a girl! A beautiful little girl! Oh Cupid! She's perfect!"

I did it! I really really did it! I feel wonderful... like I could never do wrong again! My baby, my daughter! She's born ! Now I can sleep...

"You're doing great Cupid. Just one more to go. Let's get your son out of you now. Okay?"

::glances up at widely grinning grandma in stuptification:: Again? I have to do that again!?!? Oh. My. God!

~~~

::looks up as lover peeks head through bedroom doorway and flashes exultant smile of joy::

"I have a visitor with me. Someone who wanted to see you and the babies."

"Sure... as long as they're quiet. I just got them both to sleep."

::watches as tall dark visitor in black leather armor and carrying two giant teddy-bears walks into room::

Not even an hour old and he's spoiling them already. ::grins:: I always knew he was a softy at heart. ::wearily climbs out of big soft fluffy bed and materializes soft white silk toga to wear::

"Come on Pops. Come meet your Grandkids."

::tries to smother grin at Big Bad God of War tip-toeing over to double crib::

I hope Pops realizes that I plan to use him as a babysitter a whole lot. He's just too good at the whole Daddy thing to weasel out of it.

::points to blonde headed white winged little boy asleep on his tummy with his legs curled up under him and smiles softly::

"This is your Grandson... Bliss. The new God of Redemption. He'll be dedicated to the House of Love tomorrow."

::points to raven haired black winged little girl asleep on tummy with arms crossed under head and smiles just as sweetly::

"This is your Granddaughter... Torment. The new Goddess of Revenge. She'll be dedicated to the House of War tomorrow... with your permission, of course."

::looks up to see gentle smile on fathers face and a misty wetness in his haunting dark eyes::

"...of course..."

~~~

::paces back and forth across own temple floor while King Iphicles and his Royal Guardsmen try to make last minute adjustments to highly polished armor::

Why am I so nervous? I shouldn't be this nervous. I mean, I am a GOD! Just because in about ten more minutes I'll be getting ::swallows hard:: married, that's no reason to turn into a quivering wreck. Right? It'll just be me and Strife and Mom and Pops and Grandma... and half the Pantheon and the city of Corinth and a triple handful of assorted mortals that Mom invited and... ::begins to hyperventilate::

Oh Gods! What if I forget my lines! What if Strife says no! What if I trip over my own feet! What if... What if... ::takes deep breath and mentally grabs hold of self before totally sliding into gibbering panic attack:: I can do this! I'm a GOD! Hades in an all male review, I'm the God of Love , so of course I can do this! I just need to... stay calm and focused and remember to breath !

::turns sharply and paces in other direction::

Nothing will go wrong! Nothing would dare go wrong. ::smirks:: After all, didn't I finally convince Strife that we couldn't have a virgin sacrifice? Yes! I did! See?... There you have it. I am in control. I am not nervous. I am...

"CUPIE! WE'RE READY FOR YOU NOW!"

::knees begin to shake and stomach flip-flops and face goes very pale::

Oh. My. God. It's time!

~~~

Pops is so over dramatic. I can't believe I let him talk me into having an armed escort up the aisle between the witnesses instead of just popping into the temple directly in front of the alter! I can't see anything between all of Iphy's over muscled highly decorated henchmen! All I get is to hear a bunch of clanking armor and the occasional giggle.

::strains up on tip-toe to try and see lover standing at alter waiting for him::

Shit! Can't see him. Although, I do have a great view of the dais and Pops' throne behind the alter. Looks like the family is all gathered around Pops to have the best view. Since it is Pops temple, I'm not too surprised. He does look good all lounged out on his throne with Torment cradled in his arms though. And Mom is perched on one arm of the obsidian throne at his side with Bliss cradled to her chest. ::sighs:: I have such a beautiful family... and I can't wait to make Strife an official part of it.

::blinks and smiles as Iphy's Honor Guard suddenly melts to either side of him to reveal the alter with Grandma standing behind it and his beloved standing to one side of it::

Oh. My. God. He's beautiful ! I don't think I've ever seen Strife in anything but that kinky black leather catsuit or completely naked. But that outfit he's wearing now is simply wonderful. Tight black leather pants, a soft pale blue silk shirt and black leather wrist guards. Wow! ::feels cock begin to stir under white silk toga and must exercise extreme self control::

"Cupid... Cupid... Cupid!"

::Grandma's sharp voice pulls mind away from gorgeous lover's hot body and back to present situation::

"Huh?"

Is that a smirk? Hera is smirking at me! ::glances around and blushes:: Most of 'em are laughing at me! Well... giggling behind their hands, anyway. How long did she call me? Was I in some stupid daze of lust or something?

"I said , are you ready to begin?"

I'm here aren't I? Like... duh ! ::squeaks - clears throat - tries again::

"Uh... yeah."
~~~

"As the Goddess of Marriage, I Hera, now pronounce that Cupid God of Love and Strife God of Mischief are now officially bonded and shall remain so for eternity."

::big goofy grin spreads across face to match big goofy grin of brand new husband::

"You may now kiss before these witnesses."

Oh sweet love, sweet eternal love! ::feels heart flutter and melt into mushy pile of happiness:: Oh! Oh! Oh my! His lips taste soooo sweet and I live for the feel of his arms holding me tight and I don't ever want to stop. Oooo hold me! Squeeze me! Take me!

CRASH! BANG - BANG! TOO-OOUUUGH! TOO-OOUUUGH! CLANG! CLANG! CLANG! CLANG!

::jumps in startlement at the loud sounds of crashes and an odd horn blowing at the far end of city::

"What the...?!"

::whips head around when King Iphicles jumps up from his seat at far side of alter and yanks sword out of sheath::

"That's the alarm from the front gates of the city! The guards there just signaled the arrival of armed invaders! I gotta go!"

Armed invaders! Warning alarms! What the...?

::turns startled and confused green eyes to watch Uncle Herc and Iolaus get up to go with King Iphicles::

"Ahhh... Caesar's here. Finally! I didn't think he'd accept my invitation to the wedding. I mean, how are you supposed to celebrate a wedding without a good fight?"

::turns to glare at grinning War God as he gently hands Torment to Hera::

"Well... gotta go party it up. Coming guys?"

::blinks in stunned amazement at dark fathers sheer audacity as Herc, Iolaus, Iphy and the armed Honor Guard disappear in a shower of red sparkles along with God of War::

I can't belive he actually DID it! He started a WAR in honor of my wedding! I don't know if I should laugh... or cry! I mean... I'm the God of Love for Zeus sakes. ::turns to complain to brand new husband only to be confronted with a big cheesy grin::

"Cool, huh Cupie!"

::sighs and rolls big beautiful green eyes::

What did I get myself into?

~~~

::glances around gaudily decorated Main Olympian Assembly Hall and winces:: Well... Since Pops sponsored our wedding, and Mom made all the arrangements and Grandma officiated... it was only fair to let Discord throw the reception party. ::looks at selection of mortals conveniently chained to walls and cringes:: Still... I wished she'd just, ya know, hung flowers up around the place.

::gazes across room to see husband chatting with painfully shy step-father in a darkened corner::

In any event... Strife seems to be having a blast. It's a little confusing though. People keep popping in and out, so I'm never really sure who's here or not. It's almost like one huge party instead of an Olympian Wedding Reception and a War in Corinth. ::snorts in confused amusement:: Even those people who normally avoid Pops in a "War and Violence" type of mood are heading down to the city to participate.

::chuckles:: I thought poor Julius Caesar was gonna fall on his sword just ta stop having ta listen to Athena lecture him on proper tactics and strategy. ::giggles:: Someone's gonna have ta tell her that the man can't stand her before she drives him completely insane.

::grabs a goblet of ambrosia laced wine from magically floating serving tray as it slides past::

And Hermes? ::smirks:: I thought Strife was gonna pass out from joy when the old sneak thief gave him his wedding gift. I mean, it was so original and thoughtful... ::rolls eyes and grins:: and it had the added benefit of amusing Pops too. I mean... I'd have never thought of breaking Jett outta that Spartan jail and dropping him in the middle of Caesar's troops with a double handful of razor sharp daggers and telling him to "go have some fun... let off some steam"... but ol' Hermes never misses a trick. And Strife was so touched that someone remembered his favorite mortal on this very important day. ::grins::

::looks around at happy party goers and smirks:: I think it's about time to make sure the babies are safely with Grandma and go collect my husband. We've got some private celebrating to do... ::leers:: Honeymoon time!


END