HEART AND SOUL

by Melinda

Fandom: Hercules

Pairing: Hercules/Iolaus Iolaus/Jason

Rating: NC-17

Summary: Hercules admits his love

HEART AND SOUL
by Melinda

'It's just like old times,' Hercules happily thought. Iolaus and Jason by his side cheerfully arguing and teasing with one another. Just like when they'd been at the Academy only a few years earlier.

But that was then...and this was now.

Now Jason was King of Corinth. The responsibility of his position was starting to show in the eyes...wary and calculating at times...always having to consider the reasons behind each request...each compliment.

Now Hercules was involved in the Labors set upon him. And he was tired...tired of watching his own back...so tired of the solitude of each night's campfire.

Now Iolaus was...

Hercules carefully glanced at the smaller man. Jason's message had reached him at the Delphi Crossroads just in time to catch him before he'd turned towards Thebes. Looking at the blonde, Hercules had found it hard to believe Jason's concern had any merit...until he'd seen the shadows in Iolaus' blue eyes.

"So what's it like, oh great King, to play hooky?" Iolaus was teasing.

Jason's dark eyes crinkled in amusement. "Pretty much like playing hooky from the Academy," he admitted.

"I can't believe you managed to ditch the bodyguard," Iolaus giggled.

"Well, I AM with the two of you," Jason airily pointed out. "I guess my advisers thought I was protected well enough."

Iolaus leaned over and patted Jason's arm. "That's right. We'll protect you," he solemnly promised.

Jason snorted even as he chuckled.

"C'mon, let's race!" Iolaus gleefully challenged. He gathered the reins of his horse and looked at his friends.

Hercules warily eyed his mount. It had been a concession to Jason's advisers that they traveled to Alcmene's farm on horseback and not on foot. Both Jason and Iolaus were excellent riders. However, he'd never been all that comfortable on horseback.

"What's the matter, Herc?" Iolaus grinned. "Afraid you'll lose if you can't do the running yourself?"

Hercules sighed. "No jumping," he proposed.

Iolaus shrugged. "Then you take the long way around." Without another word, he kicked his horse into a gallop...making straight for a downed tree.

"IOLAUS!" Hercules yelled in frustration.

Jason glanced at the demigod. "You've got to talk to him, Hercules. He won't listen to me even if I tried to talk to him about this." He also kicked his horse into a gallop and followed Iolaus.

"I am NOT breaking my neck," Hercules growled. Then he kicked his horse into a gallop and followed.

*

Alcmene glanced out the window as she heard the pounding of horses rapidly approaching the house. Cautiously stepping onto the front porch, she shaded her eyes and stared down the road. She was torn between laughing in pleasure and smacking a certain blonde head.

With a wild whoop, Iolaus easily cleared the top of the half-built stone wall. Even as the horse made the jump, Iolaus turned to see who followed. Off-balance, he started to slide from the horse's back but easily caught himself. By the time all four of his horse's hooves touched the ground, he'd leaned forward over the horse's neck and was kicking it into a gallop.

Teeth gritted, Jason determinedly followed Iolaus over the wall but groaned when he saw his friend halfway across the yard.

Iolaus brought his horse to a skittering stop by the front porch. "Hi, Alcmene!" he chirped.

"Iolaus! You scared me half to death!" Alcmene half-laughed. She tried to glare at Jason who stopped his horse next to Iolaus'. "You, too, Jason!"

Jason tried not to grin as he glanced over his shoulder.

Alcmene looked past them to watch Hercules' horse trotting along the edge of the wall. She sternly glared at Iolaus who snickered as Hercules casually rode down the lane to the house.

Iolaus and Jason exchanged smirks. "Decided not to jump, huh, Herc?" Iolaus teased.

"I didn't see any reason to tear up Mother's yard," Hercules easily replied.

Guiltily, the other two glanced back at the disturbed yard.

"Sorry, Alcmene," Jason muttered.

"Yeah, we're really sorry," Iolaus added. "We were just in a hurry to get ho...here." He smiled engagingly.

Hercules noticed the travel bag on the porch. "Are you going somewhere, Mother?"

"Actually, I was going to Corinth," Alcmene admitted. "Do you remember Sophia?"

"I remember you talking about her," Hercules nodded as he dismounted. He smiled as Iolaus took the reins of his horse and began leading the horses around the yard to cool them down.

"She finally became pregnant and is due to give birth in a few weeks," Alcmene explained. "I promised I'd be there."

"You were going to Corinth by yourself?" Hercules hotly demanded.

Alcmene fixed her blue eyes on her son and stared at him until he began squirming. "Yes," she finally answered. "I'm quite capable of taking care of myself." Then she relented. "But I appreciate your concern, Hercules."

"I need to be returning to Corinth," Jason quickly spoke up. "I'd be honored to escort you, Alcmene." He ignored Hercules' grateful glance.

"Jason, you just got here!" Alcmene exclaimed. "I couldn't ask you to turn right around and go back."

"We could hitch one of the horses to the wagon," Iolaus proposed. "That would make it easier on Jason." He grinned at his friend's glare. "And you, too, Alcmene."

"I just took some time to travel here with Hercules and Iolaus," Jason quickly explained. "I do have to get back to Corinth." He flashed a charming smile. "And you'd be much better company on the journey than these two."

"Sore loser," Iolaus grumbled although his eyes twinkled.

"Please, Mother?" Hercules murmured.

"Very well," Alcmene agreed after a moment. "But I hate that you're cutting your visit short, Jason."

The Corinthian king shrugged. "I've played hooky long enough," he said.

"We could all go back together," Iolaus proposed.

Alcmene caught the quick look of concern that passed between her son and Jason...a look Iolaus didn't see.

"I thought you were going to help me around here," Hercules reminded him.

"Like repairing the barn roof?" Alcmene innocently added. "You know, the one you two fell through when you were horsing around...what was it? Over a year ago?"

"Has it been that long?" Iolaus plaintively asked. "And you haven't fixed it yet, Herc?"

"I repaired it," Hercules lamely answered.

"Temporary patches," Alcmene continued. "It's never been fixed permanently...or correctly." She eyed the two of them sternly. "Then there's the well."

"The well?" Iolaus gulped.

"The one the two of you promised to dig?" Alcmene recalled. "That was...over a year ago as well."

"Looks like there's enough to keep the two of you busy," Jason grinned. "Don't worry, Hercules. I'll escort Alcmene back when she's ready to return."

"Alcmene..." Iolaus gave her his best woeful look. "You do have some food, don't you? You wouldn't leave me with Herc working me to death without something to eat...would you?"

"Iolaus!" Hercules hissed.

"I wouldn't think of it," Alcmene assured him with a fond smile. "Why don't you go hunting? Jason and Hercules can take care of the horses and a few chores for me. I'll cook enough for the two of you for a few days, and we'll leave in the morning. That'll give Jason a chance to rest."

"That's okay. I don't need..." Jason began then grunted as Iolaus' elbow jabbed into his ribs.

"Thanks, Alcmene," the blonde smiled. "You're the best."

*

The sun had barely risen when Hercules and Jason finished hitching Jason's horse to the wagon.

"Thanks again, Jason," Hercules murmured. "I won't worry about Mother if you're with her."

"You gonna tell her that?" Jason grinned.

"No." Hercules shook his head with an embarrassed flush.

"It's not a problem," Jason assured him. He glanced over his shoulder to see Iolaus and Alcmene walking towards them. "You talk to him, Hercules. I've got to take action once I get back."

"I know," Hercules nodded. "Jason...thanks for holding off until we got Iolaus out of Corinth." He hesitated. "He didn't...he wasn't a part of what they did."

Jason smiled. "I know that." He lowered his voice as the others approached. "I just don't want him getting hurt."

Hercules nodded in agreement then turned and smiled at his mother. "Please give my best to Sophia."

"I will," Alcmene smiled as she hugged her son. "If you and Iolaus get done with the repairs early, come to Corinth and join us."

Hercules helped his mother onto the wagon seat as Iolaus nestled Alcmene's travel bag and a hamper of food in the straw in the back of the wagon.

"You two boys be careful," Alcmene admonished with a twinkle in her eyes.

"We will," Hercules smiled. "Travel safe." He caught Jason's eye for an extra second or two then stepped back.

Alcmene waved back at her son and his best friend until they were out of sight. Then she turned to Jason with a pleasant smile. "Do you want to tell me what those meaningful looks and whispered conversations between you and Hercules are all about?"

Jason half-choked. Regaining his composure, he slowly grinned. "Still can't put anything past you, can we?"

"I certainly hope not," Alcmene fervently agreed.

Jason hesitated. "I can't," he finally answered. "I only told Hercules because...I had no choice. And I'd be violating a confidence if I told you." 'And it may cost me a really good friend anyway.'

Alcmene quietly studied the young king. "Then you shouldn't tell me," she finally decided.

"Thanks," Jason gratefully sighed.

"It's not easy, is it?" Alcmene asked after a few minutes' silence. "Being king?"

"No," Jason immediately answered. 'Especially when a friendship is involved.'

Almost as though she'd heard the words, Alcmene gently squeezed Jason's arm and smiled.

(2)

Hercules and Iolaus worked hard to repair the barn roof. Guilty at having left the repairs undone for so long, the demigod was determined to get it done in one day. Iolaus had grumbled good-naturedly about the rush until late afternoon when it became obvious a storm was closing in. Then he became a blur of motion.

They'd hauled in water from the old well to heat for bathing just as the first splatters of rain hit the roof. Winning a quick game of rock, dagger, parchment, Hercules headed for the tub. "Make yourself useful and get some clean clothes from upstairs," he cheerfully called back.

"That works for you," Iolaus retorted. "What about me?"

Hercules stuck his head around the corner. "You've got clothes upstairs," he answered in surprise. "Mother always keeps some for you. Remember?"

"She still...yeah, I know." Iolaus quickly masked his own surprise. "I'll get 'em."

Hercules hesitated then went to take his bath.

'Alcmene still keeps clothes here for me?' Iolaus shook his head trying not to feel guilty. He decided he would come around more often. Jason was busy in Corinth and Herc...well, he wasn't going to be able to come home much anymore.

He carefully laid his clean clothes on a chair in the kitchen then tossed Herc's clothing into the next room. He grinned when the demigod yelled, "Thanks for dumping my clean clothes on the floor!"

"You're welcome!" Iolaus giggled. "I'm gonna put your mother's stew on to heat up."

"Remember, she said not to add anything," Hercules warned.

"I know," Iolaus grumbled. He got the fire going and settled the pot over the flames. Then he grinned. Adding a few spices wouldn't hurt.

When Hercules joined him, Iolaus was stirring the stew. He suspiciously eyed his friend as Iolaus handed him the spoon.

"Don't let it stick," Iolaus quickly advised heading for the tub.

Hercules shrugged watching as his friend disappeared into the next room. He stirred the stew for a few minutes then cautiously looked over his shoulder. Adding a few spices wouldn't hurt. Iolaus liked spicy foods. 'Maybe it'll put him in a mellow mood for when we talk later.' He frowned remembering the private conversation he'd had with Jason in Corinth.

*

<'They're going to hurt him, Hercules.' Jason anxiously paced back and forth.

'Iolaus hasn't done anything wrong. He's just picked the wrong people to...' Hercules' voice trailed off.

'I can almost understand that,' Jason absently nodded. 'I really can, Hercules. But I can't talk to him about this. Especially after...' He ran a hand through his dark hair.

'Especially after the two of you having been lovers?' Hercules quietly finished looking away from his friend. He felt, rather than saw, Jason's look of surprise.

'Iolaus told you?' Jason gasped.

Hercules quickly shook his head. 'Nobody had to tell me. I figured it out all by myself.'

Jason flushed. 'I thought we were discreet.'

Hercules shrugged. 'You were. I just know the two of you better than others
do.'

'Then you understand why you've got to talk to him about this,' Jason urged. 'Coming from me...it'll just seem like...jealousy or something.'

'Jason...' Hercules hesitated. 'You and Iolaus...why aren't you still...'

He took a deep breath. 'No. That's none of my business. I shouldn't have asked that.'

Jason frowned. 'I've made it your business by bringing you into this.' He shook his head. 'We...wanted each other. I never thought there was any great love...romantic love on either his part or mine.' He stared at Hercules until the demigod met his eyes. 'Iolaus was a substitute for
someone I can't have. I told him that. I just didn't tell him who it is I can't have. I didn't trick him.'

'I know. I still shouldn't have asked,' Hercules repeated looking away. He took a deep breath. 'The important thing is to keep Iolaus from getting hurt.'

'I'll have to move soon,' Jason warned. 'We need to get Iolaus out of Corinth before then. Their ship's due back in about a week. I can't let it go longer than that.'

Hercules nodded. 'Why don't I take him home with me? Better yet, why don't you come, too? It'll be just like old times.'

Jason fought a silent battle between duty and personal desire for a couple of seconds. Then he decided one last visit wouldn't hurt. 'Okay, but I've got to be gone before you talk with Iolaus. Like I said, coming from me, he might dismiss it as jealousy.' Turning away, he sighed. 'You don't have any emotional baggage from being Iolaus' lover. He'll listen to you.'>>

*

Hercules wondered how he'd managed not to laugh in Jason's face. Spotting the clean clothes Iolaus had forgotten, he picked up the blue shirt and stroked the material. 'I wish I was Iolaus' lover, Jason. You don't know how much...' Closing his eyes, he indulged in a fantasy he'd perfected during those long lonely nights by solitary campfires...a fantasy of Iolaus' hands and mouth covering his body with soft yet insistent kisses...a fantasy of sweet and gentle urges slowly building into a blaze of passion that left both gasping yet wanting more...a fantasy of...

"Hey, Herc! I forgot my clothes! Here's your chance to toss them on the floor!" Iolaus yelled.

Hercules jerked. He stared down at his hands to see he'd crumpled Iolaus' shirt into a tight ball.

"Herc! You out there?" Iolaus demanded.

Hercules jerked again hearing the water splash in the tub. He had a sudden mental vision of Iolaus' wet naked body appearing from the next room. "Yeah! Coming!" he quickly yelled. He took a deep breath and walked into the bathing room. "Here you go," he mumbled tossing the clothing on a nearby chair.

"Thanks, Herc," Iolaus smiled up at him.

"Yeah," Hercules muttered quickly turning around to leave.

Frowning, Iolaus stared over his shoulder at his friend's back as he disappeared into the next room.

*

Dinner was a quiet strained affair. The earlier rain had not lasted long. But thunder rolled in the distance promising a heavier storm. Hercules seemed deep in thought and only grunted responses to Iolaus' half-hearted teasing. Eventually, Iolaus subsided into silence lost in his own thoughts. Finally, Hercules realized it was late.

"Go to bed, Iolaus," he abruptly said. "I'll clean this up."

"You sure?" Iolaus carefully asked.

"I'm sure," Hercules curtly replied quickly standing up. He missed the look of confusion and hurt that flashed across Iolaus' face before the smaller man quietly left.

'I can do this. I can do this.' Hercules silently repeated the words as he washed the dishes and made a pallet by the fire. 'I'll talk to him tomorrow. He'll never know that I...' The demigod silently laughed at himself. 'Jason, you were so afraid Iolaus would see your concern as jealousy. I'm far more jealous than you could ever hope to be. I love him way more than...' The demigod's blue eyes widened in surprise then he groaned. 'I really gotta think this one through.'

*

Iolaus sat cross-legged on the bed he'd used years ago when visiting Hercules and Alcmene. He stared dry-eyed into the darkness trying to figure out why his heart was hurting so badly. 'Herc can't be that mad 'cause I tossed his clothes on the floor. It's gotta be something else. But what? What did I do?'

A sudden clap of thunder startled him. He glanced outside at the rain beating against the window and realized hours must have passed while he had been sitting in the dark. 'It's really petty if he's mad 'cause I threw his clothes on the floor,' Iolaus told himself. 'But it's a little enough thing that I can apologize for.' Resolutely, he got to his feet and walked downstairs.

He paused on the stairs seeing Hercules curled up by the fire. 'He didn't even want to come upstairs and sleep in the same room?' He knew from the sudden tensing of the demigod's shoulders that Hercules was aware of his presence when he came closer.

"Herc? I don't know what I did to make you mad...but I'm sorry," Iolaus quietly spoke. When Hercules didn't reply, Iolaus bit his lower lip. "Herc, please go upstairs to sleep. This is your home. You don't need to stay away from your bed. I'll sleep down here."

"I'm not mad at you, Iolaus," Hercules carefully replied without turning over. He desperately tried to will his erection to soften.

"Then what's going on?" Iolaus sat behind his friend.

Sighing, Hercules sat up bunching the blanket over his lap to hide his half-erect cock. "Iolaus...those guys you're...with in Corinth," Hercules stammered. "Stefanos and his gang."

Iolaus flushed. "They're not a gang," he argued. "They're not the Lowlacks."

"They're worse." Hercules steadied his voice. "Iolaus...they're slavers. And they've probably got you slated for their next shipment."

"What are you talking about?" Iolaus demanded. "They're not slavers!"

"Yes, they are!" Hercules half-shouted. "Jason has proof. He's planning on arresting them when he gets back to Corinth."

Iolaus' blue eyes narrowed. "Then why were you two so anxious to get out of Corinth?"

"To get you away from them," Hercules sighed. "Jason planted a spy in that gang. He...mentioned you." He looked away from the stricken look on Iolaus' face.

"Why didn't Jason tell me?" Iolaus coldly asked after a few seconds' silence.

"He was afraid you'd mistake his concern for jealousy," Hercules automatically replied. The room suddenly felt a lot colder. He cautiously glanced at his friend. "Iolaus?" he softly asked frightened by the anger he saw.

"Jason told you...told you about us?" Iolaus angrily demanded.

"He had to," Hercules quickly answered. "I couldn't understand why he didn't talk to you and..."

"HE TOLD YOU?!" Iolaus yelled. The smaller man got to his feet. "I can't believe he did that!"

"Iolaus! It's my fault! I made him!" Hercules stressed.

"I suppose Jason's spy told him everything I'd done," Iolaus snarled. "And I guess Jason passed it all on to you, right? Tell me, did the two of you have fun talking about...me...like that? Did you have fun hearing about who I fucked? How I fucked 'em? How many I fucked?"

Hercules tried to get to his feet but stumbled over the blanket bunched around him.

"I guess that's why you haven't been friendly since it got dark, huh?" Iolaus angrily paced back and forth. "Well, I got news for you, Herc, old buddy. Sex is pretty good in the daylight, too." He gave a short laugh as he pulled open the front door. "Don't worry. This little street rat knows his place. Your virtue's safe!"

"Iolaus!" Hercules yelled as the blonde slammed the door behind him. "Iolaus! Come back here!"

Hercules threw open the door and ran into the yard. Desperately, he looked around for his friend. A flash of lightning illuminated the area, and Hercules saw Iolaus running towards the barn...and the woods beyond.

'I'll never find him if he gets into the woods.' Hercules called on all his speed to chase his friend. He flung himself against Iolaus' back just as they reached the barn.

Iolaus grunted as he found himself face-down in the mud. Angrily, he tried to roll away. "Lemme go!"

"No! No, I won't!" Hercules yelled back. Keeping a tight grip on Iolaus' arm, the demigod got to his feet and pulled Iolaus out of the mud. "You're not running! I lost you when you ran before! You're not doing that again!"

"What do you care?" Iolaus demanded. "You and Jason! Neither of you give a damn about me!"

"That's not true!" Hercules angrily denied. "We both care! We care a lot!"

"Don't lie to me!" Iolaus struggled to get free. "I'm nothing to you! At least with Stefanos..."

"What with Stefanos?" Hercules demanded when Iolaus stopped talking. "What, Iolaus?" He angrily shook his friend.

"At least for a while...for a few minutes even...somebody cares!" Iolaus angrily shouted. "It may only be a warm body for a few minutes in the dark of night...but at least it's something!"

Hercules stared into his friend's eyes desperately trying to understand. "Is that all you want, Iolaus? A warm body for a few minutes in the dark of night?"

"It's all I can have!" Iolaus screamed. "Don't you get it, Hercules?! It's all somebody like me ever gets!"

"That's not true," Hercules shook his head. He quickly pulled Iolaus against him and roughly kissed his mouth. He felt Iolaus' lips soften and shivered in anticipation.

For a split second, everything in Iolaus' world was perfect. Then reality, much like the cold rain falling about them, struck him in the face.

Hercules suddenly felt Iolaus' body stiffen against him. Opening his eyes, he found Iolaus coldly staring at him.

"Do you think I want your pity?" Iolaus coldly hissed.

Shocked, Hercules almost released Iolaus. Instead, he shook his head. "Is that what you think? Do you honestly think my friendship with you has been based on pity?" He angrily shook Iolaus. "Do you really think what I feel for you is just pity?" he shouted.

Uncertainly flickered in Iolaus' eyes, but he held his ground and defiantly stared up at his friend.

"I've never lied to you, Iolaus. And I never will." Hercules took a deep breath. "Stefanos and his gang are slavers. They'd sell you in a minute...sell you someplace where we'd never find you." He took another breath fighting to control his emotions. "Jason and I were worried about you. Because you're our friend." He slowly released Iolaus and stepped back. "Go if you still want to. But you'll be taking my heart with you."

Using the last vestige of self-control, Hercules turned and walked through the rain back to the house.

(3)