Title: Suicide Boy

Author: Growly

Fandom: Invader Zim

Pairing: Zim/Dib (eventually)

Rating: R (For now)

Disclaimer: They don't belong to me. They belong only to Jhonen (and Nick can go to the bad place for cancelling the show)

Archive: As I said in my other fics, yes to WWOMB.

Warnings: Later chapters will contain violence, rape, death, gore, references to cutting and other forms of self-inflicted pain. Notes: This story is going to start out a bit slow, so please bear with me. And as for this... I just thought I'd take care of all the warnings and such at once.

Now, for the uninitiated:

Basic info on Invader Zim:

The PLOT: Zim is an alien (more than slightly insane) from the planet Irk. His leaders have started a plot for galactic conquest known as Operation Impending Doom 2 (more on OID1 later). They invite the best soldiers to the "great assigning" where they recieve their missions as
invaders to infiltrate, weaken and gather information on their assigned planets. Zim shows up uninvited and unwanted and his leaders send him on a phony mission to get him off their backs. So it is that Zim finds himself on earth, trying to conquer the planet with little success and a lot of interference from his enemy/rival Dib.

The CHARACTERS:

Zim: The main character. Zim is an Irken, a species of alien where status is based on height. Zim is also very short, but very ambitious and more than slightly insane. He was banished for ruining Operation Impending Doom 1 by activating his destroyer mecha while still on his home planet. His leaders were not pleased by this, obviously. When he showed up for Operation Impending Doom 2, they effectively banished him again, this time passing it off as a "secret mission".

Zim is ambitious and egomaniacal (and a bit megalomaniacal). He is constantly coming up with plans to take over the planet which inevitably fail. He has the most self-confidence of any of the
characters, and constantly refers to himself in third person as if to boost his estimation of his own worth. He likes to utter the word "doom" and his favorite thing to say seems to be "I am ZIM!!!"

Quotes:
"I am ZIM!!!"
"Invader's blood marches through my veins like GIANT RADIOACTIVE RUBBER PANTS! The pants command me! Do not ignore my veins!!" "Another win for the Irken army! Clean, lemony-fresh victory is mine!" "This may prove valuable as I can use the child to learn more about human AFFECTION, which from what I'm able to determine is pain-based."

~

Dib: The other main character of the show, and Zim's self-proclaimed "mortal enemy". Dib has been interested in the paranormal all his life (since he was abducted by aliens as a baby) and sees Zim as a chance to prove that extraterrestrial life does exist. He is constantly talking about how he will expose Zim to the world and other such things.

However, the rest of the world regards Dib as insane, including his own father - world famous scientist Professor Membrane - and his sister, Gaz. Life seems to have it out for Dib. Although he messes up most of Zim's plans that weren't already self-defeating, he gets no further ahead by doing it. He wants to be accepted by his peers and family, but is frustrated with their inability to see what is perfectly obvious to him: that Zim is an alien.

Quotes:
"Incredible. See Gaz, to defeat my enemy I must study my enemy, then become my enemy, then move in with my enemy, then wear my enemy's clothes, then....."
"One for the human race, NOTHING for the Zim...thingy...race."
"Oh, come on! I like Tak, and she hates YOU! You're just jealous."

~

GIR: GIR is a SIR (standard issue retrieval unit AKA a robot) assigned to Zim for his mission. GIR was put together by Zim's leaders from random scrap metal parts and his brain consists of a paperclip, a key, a gumball, two coins and other assorted junk. He is VERY insane and prone to go to raves, or forget his mission at the most inopportune times. No one knows what the "G" in GIR stands for.

Quotes:
"Your head smells like a puppy!"

~

Gaz: Dib's younger sister, who is very creepy and gothic and is frequently threatening to "doom" her brother. She is always seen with her trusty Game Slave (video game system) playing her favorite game Vampire Piggy Hunter. She knows Zim is an alien, but thinks her
brother is crazy and stupid anyway.

Quotes:
"Dib drank the last soda... He will PAY!!!"
"Your voices are making me sick."

~

The Tallest: Hoo boy...where to start... As Irken society is determined by height, the leaders are the tallest Irkens, and are known as the Tallest (or the Almighty Tallest). Incidentally, among the IZ slash community the two Tallest are considered almost canon (and certainly fanon). The Tallest are:

Tallest Red: He has red eyes (like most Irkens) hence the name. He seems to be the more aggressive of the two, and treats his co-ruler with alternating sadism (the laser to the eye thing...) and protectiveness (he was VERY fast to defend Purple's love of snacks when speaking to Zim) which makes it a very interesting relationship indeed. He is more charismatic than his co-ruler, despite his tendency to treat his underlings like dirt.

Quotes:
"I told you they'd like the lasers"
"All while gathering crucial information, assessing the planet's weaknesses, making it VULNERABLE to our...big...spaceship...gang..."

Tallest Purple: He has purple eyes, which is something of a mystery since every other Irken ever shown with purple eyes has been female. He seems pretty intelligent, although not as charismatic as his co-ruler, and is prone to bouts of sadistic behavior towards annoying underlings (But never towards Red). When he doesn't like a situation, he tends to sulk and exert passive-aggressiveness (playing stupid to annoy Red is one of the ones he does frequently).

Quotes:
"You QUIT being BANISHED?"
"That's great, Zim... Don't worry. That's just my arms...flailing and giggling..."

Minor but important characters:

Professor Membrane: Dib's famous scientist father. He has his own show "Probing the Membrane of Science". He thinks his son is crazy. Quotes: "My poor insane son..."

Tak: An Irken female with a grudge against Zim after he ruined her chance at becoming an invader.
Quotes: "For longer than I can remember, I've been looking for someone like you. Someone with a head like yours and a torso too. Birds sing and you're gonna PAY! The end." (A poem to Zim)

Ms Bitters: The creepy teacher at Zim and Dib's school. She says "Doom" a lot and rather resembles a snake.
Quotes: "Today's lecture is about outer space, and how it will eventually implode in on itself."

Other Notes of Interest about the Show:

* The show's creator did several of the voices of background characters.

* The show was canceled after the first season. Some second season episodes aired in Brazil but not in the US. Audio for a few unanimated episodes is available online.

*According to the audio and script of one unanimated episode, Zim and Dib become really almost dependant on each other. When Dib decides to give up chasing Zim and take up "real science" it sends the alien into a depression so deep he can't even muster the enthusiasm to come up with any new plans. Their banter when things get worked out and they're finally "back together" so to speak, is very cute.

*Jhonen is also the creator of the comics "Johnny the Homicidal Maniac" and "Squee"

***

That's all the information for now. If I ever get my page up and running it will have downloadable clips of episodes (10-45 seconds long) as well as other information on the show.

With all that out of the way... the fic begins in the next chapter.

*Growly

Suicide Boy
by Growly

The light was dim, it was still an hour or so until dawn, and Dib sat in a solemn tableau, his face illuminated by the flickering computer screen. Nothing unusual at all about the scene, except if one looked close enoug... Dark circles under his eyes were barely hidden by the thick glasses he wore, and even those could not disguise the glazed look in the depths of his amber eyes. Everything about him seemed a bit dimmer... a bit less vivid than normal. Even his wild scythe-like cowlick drooped down across his face.

From time to time his head would dip slightly, as he was on the verge of nodding off, but always he would jerk back to awareness with a strangled gasp, his heart hammering in his chest. Then slowly he would calm down and work himself back into that same state of listlessness he had worn for the past two days. Had it been two days? He couldn't be sure really. Time held no meaning for him in his self-imposed hell. Only the burning in his throat and the state of near collapse he was in was indicative of the passage of the hours.

It took a while for him to register that the harsh rasping he was hearing was his own breath, and for some reason the knowledge of that fact filled him with a sort of giddy glee. He knew it was just stress and lack of sleep getting to him... well... aside from his encounter the other day. Quickly he drove the thought from his mind, even as he giggled a little under his breath.

Maybe he had gone crazy. Maybe he'd been crazy all along and just hadn't wanted to admit it to himself.

Except that everything no one else wanted to believe in was real. All of it was real. Dragging open one of his drawers, Dib pulled out a stack of photographs and glanced over them, a wild look coming into his eyes.

Zim. They were all pictures of Zim. Zim in his human disguise. Zim yelling at his robot. Zim and his spaceship. Zim, Zim, Zim... it was ALL Zim. His entire life had been reduced to his pursuit of the alien. Nevermind that most of Zim's ideas were so ridiculous that they would undoubtedly have fouled themselves up without his intervention. He wasn't trying to save earth anymore... in fact, he could almost convince himself that Zim had the right idea in wanting to destroy everyone on the miserable planet... except...

Except that... if that was true, why had he been wasting his life trying to save any of it?

Clutching the photos in his shaking hands, Dib saw them begin to blur, and realized with a sense of bitter shame that there were tears on his cheeks. Tears. Damn. And it was all Zim's fault.

Everything was Zim's fault. His bane... his magnum opus...

The only thing in his life that made any damn sense whatsoever...

*End 01*

More Author's Notes: It's starting off slowly as I said... Later chapters WILL be longer, I promise you that.