Title: Sparky's Cigarette, Little Obsessions series

Author: MJ Gage (Yes, MJ is short for a real name, I never use)

This is the second in a Ryan O'Reily & Sean Murphy series I started with a story in the "Contraband" zine, you don't really need it to get what's going on at this point. Just rememeber this is the second encounter between these two. They've already shared one kiss. It was all inspired by the first Oz episode I saw, "Legs". I just knew there was something happening with these two.

Date: Feb. 16, 2000

Disclaimer: Wow, I wish I was as talented as the creators of these wonderful characters. Namely, Tom Fontana, Barry Levinson, & Rysher Entertainment. But I'm not so I just have to say, no copyright infringement is intended. I'm doing this out of love for the show and don't plan on making any money from this little venture.

Feedback: I will take @: MJG@sleepmail.org. I don't care what you say, it's just nice to know somebody is reading this stuff. As long as you aren't my mother.

Summery: O'Reily/ Murphy series the next step

Rating: Nothing really happens, but there is a sugestion it will get more intense. M/M, sex, violence, I'm going to go with a NC-17. Just in case.

Major big thank yous to my Beta. I could do this with out you Dulce.


Little Obsession Series: Sparky's Cigarette
by MJ

Sometimes sneaking a cigarette wasn’t worth the information you learned hiding in dark corners. He was basking in the glow of one of the rare once a millennium patches of natural sunlight in OZ. He had to get what he had just been an involuntary witness to out of his mind. Vern Schillinger and Clare Howell those Y2K freaks were right. The world was going to end.

He inhaled deeply, trying to think pure thoughts when he heard footsteps. He shrank into the shadows and prayed it wasn’t the lovebirds back for round two. Chemo wasn’t this nauseating.

"O’Reily, I hope you brought enough for the rest of the class."

A horse of a different color, still a stomach turning problem. He tried to wave away some of the incriminating smoke and gave up on the pointless endeavor. He turned to face the hack he had been trying to avoid for a week. Not possible when he was the head CO of your cell block.

"Murphy."

"Relax O’Reily. You want to get lung cancer, that’s your business."

"You’re not going to report me or anything?"

"I got bigger fish to fry."

Ryan thought about what he had just seen and began to shudder. The CO stepped forward and placed his hand on the bare flesh of Ryan's arm.

"You okay O'Reily?" There was real concern in his eyes.

O'Reily remembered the warmth of the man's body against his own. He started shivering not in horror, but white-hot need. He remembered the power of a kiss. One single kiss and he was shattered. Feeling Murphy controlling the kiss had devastated O'Reily. For the first time since he arrived at Oz he had felt like he could let someone else control the situation and not worry about what it cost him. He didn't worry about what Murphy was using him for or what he could get out of Murphy. All he wanted was contact and he was willing to bet it was reciprocal. He wanted to fall into those arms. He craved one more of Murphy's mind numbing kisses.

"Ryan?" Murphy lightly stroked O'Reily's arm. Ryan felt like he had just been plugged into an electrical socket.

O'Reily shook himself and stood up a little straighter. Well that was one way to bring Murphy closer. He stepped into Ryan's personal space. "Are you sure you're o.k, kid?"

"Yeah." O'Reily wondered how to get someone else to make the first move. "Just thinking impure thoughts."

Murphy laughed and stepped back. "That's got to be a pretty normal state of mind for you."

This wasn't going the way O'Reily planned. He didn't have a plan, but he had thought of little else for the past week. Ryan couldn't stop himself from thinking about Murphy and that one kiss, no matter how hard he tried. He couldn't even go an hour without thinking about him. Sean. Everywhere. At work in the kitchen, in the middle of a deal, in his pod at night. Particularly, in his pod when he should be sleeping and when he was dreaming. It was starting to affect his game. O'Reily needed to stay sharp and alert at all times to survive Oz. As if Cyril wasn't enough of a distraction.

Cyril. He remembered his mother's voice. 'Ryan take care of your little brother. You have to protect him. The baby is your responsibility.' He remembered deciding to listen to that voice. Thirty years later. Ryan snorted, Cyril was his responsibility. He would be taking care of the baby for the rest of his life. He wondered what time it was. He couldn't have been down here more then ten minutes. Cyril's appointment with Sister Pete was for a hour; he should be able to indulge in his second obsession for a few more minutes. Ryan moved closer to Murphy ostensibly to check his watch.

It was O'Reily's turn to be in Murphy's personal space. "O'Reily what is it with you today?" Sean didn't back away, he moved closer.

Ryan looked at Sean, making eye contact, searching. Could he say, 'Just touch me. I just need to feel you, pinning me to the wall, again.' He wasn't able to. Ryan thought he was done with all this uncontrollable need, desire. This longing that kept pulling every thought back to another person. No matter how hard he tried, everything went back to the same place, the same person - Sean. He thought he gave up this extraordinarily dangerous game with Gloria. The worst was at night; it wasn't enough he spent every waking minute with Murphy in his head. Sean was starting to star in all of Ryan's dreams. It was only one little kiss and he was frantic for more. It felt like heroin withdrawal.

Murphy grabbed O'Reily. "Ryan, what feels like withdrawal?" He shook Ryan. "O'Reily you told me you were done with that shit. What the fuck has gotten you so wound up?" He released Ryan and cupped his face in his hands. "I'm sorry." It was almost as if he realized violence would only shut the younger man down. He continued in a gentle voice. "Answer me this time, kid."

Ryan didn't think he'd spoken aloud. How could he tell Murphy what was wrong? How could he expose this raw nerve? How could he tell Sean he needed to breathe the same air he was breathing? While he was breathing it. The closer he got to Murphy, the longer he was with Murphy, the more he felt like spiders were crawling under his skin. One touch, one simple touch from the right person would make it all go away. He took a deep breath, there was a gaping chasm in front of him, he decided to step forward. After all, the worst thing that could happen, he could plummet to the rocky bottom. Ryan addressed the floor. "You."

Murphy's hands were still on Ryan's face. Sean tilted his face up until he could see Ryan's eyes. "What?" He asked patiently.

"You. You're the reason I'm so strung out I can't think. You're the reason I'm making mistakes right and left. I can't stop thinking about you. I want you."

Murphy smiled and released O'Reily, "Gee, Ryan that's tough." His sarcasm shot straight into Ryan.

Ryan closed his eyes and slammed back into the wall. He was screwed. Giving Sean control the first time had been exhilarating. It was the most deeply satisfying thing Ryan had ever experienced. He didn't have to take care of anyone....[Cyril, his mother, Cyril, Shannon, Cyril] or anything... [ parole, getting into the tit trade, parole, controlling the trade, parole, cancer, keeping Cyril safe.] He could let go for five minutes and give Sean control. He didn't have to worry and watch, he only had to drift. Murphy would take care of him. No one had ever taken care of Ryan O'Reily since his mother died. Except Gloria, and she kept telling him it was only part of her job. It wasn't part of Murphy's job.

He had given it all up to a hack. A fucking hack. He showed the huge hole he carried around inside his heart to a hack. A cocksucking hack. [Don't go there Ryan.] The fucker just pissed all over him. How could he have ever been so fucking stupid. Every time he lost control, he was fucked over. Thinking with the wrong head again, Ryan. "Fuck, fuck, fuck." He pounded his head against the wall.

Murphy moved in for the kill. "And I'm going to make it a whole lot harder." Sean pulled Ryan away from the wall and kissed him. No gentle brush of the lips. It was hard teeth grazing his lips and being sucked into an alien mouth.

Ryan's world exploded. He forgot everything. His brain stopped working and he drifted. It was good. Too good, mind numbing. Sean's hands came around his waist, under his shirt. Ryan began to lose balance, he swayed into Murphy. He wondered if he could crawl into Sean's skin.

Oxygen? Murphy's hands traveled up his torso. Warm on his cold skin. Ever since the cancer, he was always cold. He moaned and fell into Sean's warmth. Fuck oxygen, he would learn to live without breathing. Sean scratched a path down his back. Ryan arched against him. He could survive in Murphy's heat. There was something nagging. Some loose thread pulling at his rapidly unraveling mind.

Cyril. Shit. Fuck. Cyril. Ryan yanked himself away from the addicting contact. "Cyril."

Sean's hands returned to Ryan's face. "Shit Ryan. I'm sorry. That's why I came looking for you in the first place. I found Cyril wandering the hall by Sister Peter's office."

O'Reily, still trying to regain his balance, held Murphy's arms in a death grip. "He had an appointment with her."

"She didn't make it in today." Murphy's thumbs stroked Ryan's cheekbones. Attempting to soothe O'Reily and bring him back down to earth.

"Fuck." O'Reily banged his head on Murphy's shoulder.

Murphy stroked the back of O'Reily's head, preventing him from repeating the banging motion. "Relax, I left him with Beecher."

Ryan turned his head and spoke into Sean's neck. "Great, his attention span is only as good as Keller's next move." He licked his way up towards Sean's rapidly beating pulse.

Murphy laughed and pulled back. "Come on Sparky, let's get you back to Em City."



End
for now