Title: Echo

Author: Grey

Fandom: SG1

Pairing: Jack/Daniel

Rating: NC-17

Status: New/Complete

Archive: Yes

Email: Grey853@aol.com

Series/Sequel: The Echo Series Website: http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Dimension/3837/index2.html

Disclaimer: Not mine, but maybe one of these days.

Summary: Daniel deals with the aftermath of being Hathor's chosen one.

Notes: This has spoilers for "Hathor".

WARNINGS: Explicit nonconsensual sexual violence is depicted.



Echo
by Grey

Beloved fuck.

Daniel squeezed his eyes shut against the rustle of ancient cloth, the brush of lips pressing in, stealing his breath, choking away the very air. Memories echoed against his bones, his mind bearing the deep shudders as her musky taint seeped up to the surface.

"Daniel?"

Startled, he stood straighter, the lights too bright and too real as he opened his eyes to see Jack standing next to him. "What?"

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." Flustered, he shrugged and looked away. Pushing his hair back, he shook his head. "I just want to get out of this place and go home." He stepped to the locker room bench to pick up his pack, eager to leave and be free of the concerned looks aimed in his direction.

"Sounds like a solid plan, but first Dr. Frasier wants to check us out."

"What?"

"Carter just told me she's taking samples and doing the whole once over routine before we can leave."

Daniel sagged down on the bench, his mind rushing through a list of excuses and horrors. "But why?"

"Why?"

"Yeah, I mean, we know Hathor drugged or manipulated us in some way, but she's gone. What's the point?"

"The point is, if we run into her again, we might have a better chance to have a defense if we know how she managed to basically control every man here."

"Shit."

Jack put his hand on his shoulder, the kind gesture straining the younger man's control. "Daniel, it's okay. We all need to be checked out, you especially."

"Why me especially?"

"I think you know why."

The slight squeeze undid him, his body's tenuous control releasing into an involuntary jerk away from the friendly contact. "I'm sorry."

"About what?"

"This whole thing. I just wish I'd been stronger."

"You weren't the only one under the influence."

"No, but I was the only one who..." He stopped before he formed the words, the scalding force of their meaning too much.

"Who what? Slept with her?"

"That euphemism's far too kind."

"You're right. I'm sorry it happened."

Nothing happened, nothing at all. He wanted to scream it, to believe it, to know it again before memory iced his thoughts with the cold reality of Hathor's bruising touch.

Still avoiding Jack's eyes, Daniel stood up and put his arms around his chest, his hands tucked up under his armpits. "I don't suppose there's a back way out of this, huh?"

"No. Believe me if there were, I'd already be half way home by now. So, after you, Danny." Jack smiled slightly and motioned for Daniel to go first. "The sooner we get this over with, the sooner I can take you home."

Daniel stopped and met his friend's dark brown eyes for the first time. "You don't have to do that."

"Yes, I do."

Before he could argue, a hand met the small of his back and gently urged him towards the infirmary.

**************

Daniel sat on the edge of the table, his head down, his fists clenched. "I can't."

Frowning, Dr. Frasier took a long breath as she held the clipboard close. "Look, Daniel, I just need to do this last part of the exam. It's important."

"You took blood and urine. Why isn't that enough? You didn't ask the others to do this."

"None of the others had such intimate contact."

"God." He dropped his face to his hands, the shame a slimy weight over his body.

"We haven't identified the substance yet, but you've got three times as much in your system as anyone else. I need to make sure you're okay." Her voice softened as she stepped closer, her hand touching his arm. The involuntary flinch didn't go unnoticed. "It's private in here and I won't hurt you. I've done this before."

"What if I refuse?"

"Then I'll have to take you off active duty until you change your mind."

Daniel met her eyes, blinking away the blurred vision. "You don't understand."

"Understand what?"

"Understand what it feels like to betray your race. She used me."

"She used every man here, Daniel. You haven't done anything wrong. It wasn't your fault."

"Just let me go home."

"I can't. Let me do the exam and then I can give you something to help you relax."

"I don't need anything."

Putting the clipboard down, Frasier bit her lower lip and then spoke quietly. "Maybe not now, but tonight, when you're alone and you can't sleep, you will."

The subtle tension under the tone brought his head up again. Her kind eyes didn't turn away or waver. "You sound like you know that from experience."

"I've been a doctor for a long time. I've seen all kinds of reactions to assault, denial, anger, self-loathing, a whole gambit of cruel emotions. I don't want you to suffer any more than you have to while you're trying to decide which one fits. You need to rest."

"Assault?"

"Assault."

Bracing himself, shedding one more layer of dignity, he sighed and picked up the gown beside him. "All right, let's get this over with."

*************

Jack walked into the General's office on alert, his muscles tight. It didn't help the pressure to see Dr. Frasier standing beside his desk looking far less than happy. "Sir, you asked to see me?"

"Yes, Colonel. Shut the door. We need to talk."

After he did so, he turned to see the troubled expressions. "Okay, call me a cynic, but you two look like someone just killed Toto."

"The doctor and I decided that as team leader you needed to be informed of Dr. Jackson's condition."

"Condition?"

Dr. Frasier cleared her throat, but kept her voice neutral. "Hathor didn't collect her DNA sample easily. Apparently it required rather strenuous sexual contact."

Jack rubbed his temples with his right hand, listening, but not wanting to hear. "What exactly does that mean? Was she rougher than your run of the mill goa'uld goddess who hadn't had sex in 2000 years?"

Ignoring the sarcasm, Frasier spoke in layman's terms, but with precise professionalism. "He has bite marks, scratches, and bruises over his torso and genitals. She was thorough."

"Shit."

"He's also got some anal tears and bruising."

Raising his head, the air thinned, his voice stretched too far. "Anal tears and bruising?"

"Yes."

"How?"

"I'm not sure."

"Is it serious?"

"He should recover physically. It's his mental state that concerns me. He says he can't recall any details, but the temporary amnesia that affected the rest of the men has worn off. I think he's working hard *not* to remember what actually happened."

"Maybe it's better that way."

"I don't think so. The sooner he deals with it, the sooner he can heal emotionally."

Jack worried his lip and blocked away the images of that bitch with Daniel. God, he wanted to kill her, to rip out that fucking goa'uld shit and tear it in half. "So, why did you think I needed to know this?"

The General spoke first. "You're his best friend. He's going to need a friendly ear. With something like this, he may even need a strong shoulder." The older man paused, obviously uncomfortable, but still meeting Jack's eyes. "I don't know about you, Colonel, but I feel pretty damn bad just knowing how this Hathor creature used me. I can't imagine what it might be like for a man like Dr. Jackson to go through what Dr. Frasier describes."

"I don't feel so great myself, General. Being a Jaffa is not my idea of a great future."

"Thank god for the sarcophagus." Dr. Frasier smiled and then quickly lost the humor. "It's a shame we don't have one for what's ailing Daniel."

"What about Carter and Teal'c? What should I tell them?"

General Hammond pursed his lips and deferred to Frasier. "Teal'c was the one who came to me and told me I needed to check Dr. Jackson more carefully, that he might be more damaged than he appeared."

"Did he say why?"

"He said the Jaffa knew how Hathor and the other queens treated the 'chosen ones'. Apparently some didn't even survive the first time."

In his mind Jack raved and ranted, but he kept his face stony. "And Carter?"

"Captain Carter has already come to me as well, concerned because of Daniel's withdrawn behavior. She suggested counseling and I completely agree. I'm looking over the list now for someone with expertise in this area who has enough security clearance to come to the base."

"Counseling? He's going to love that."

General Hammond's voice interrupted. "It doesn't matter if he loves it, Colonel. It's not going to be an option."

"Okay, but I'm taking him home tonight. I'll stay with him."

"Good. I gave him a sedative and some medication to take with him. I've put him on medical leave for at least a week."

Grimly, the general added, "And you, Colonel, along with the rest of SG1 are on stand down for that time period. After that, we'll reevaluate the team and decide what to do."

"Thank you, sir."

"Don't thank me. Just do what you have to in order to keep the team together."

Nodding, Jack headed out and down the corridor wondering if the general had any idea how far he would go just to keep Daniel part of his personal team forever.

****************

"Um, you want coffee?" Daniel stood in the middle of his living room trying not to panic, his mind barely working enough to talk. He didn't dare look up without risking a sudden breakdown. Even his skin warred against him, itching, the burning trail of each long scratch blazing just under his clothes, taunting him.

"Sure, but I'll make it. You're out on your feet. You tripped over the threshold getting in here for christsakes. Now, sit down."

Without speaking, Daniel followed orders, his mind clouded, his body heavy. He couldn't quite figure out why Jack kept talking and not saying much, couldn't figure out why he even stayed with him. Nothing made much sense right now. The world just went on around him like nothing happened, like he hadn't been violated or changed completely. He just couldn't quite get it in his head why nobody else could see the difference.

"Daniel?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you want anything to eat?"

"Eat?"

"Yeah, you know. It's an old earth custom. We cook stuff and eat it. It's been in all the papers. I'm sure you've heard of it."

Lifting his eyes to meet Jack's, the effort strained his reserves. The world blurred and he rested his head on the back of the sofa and closed his eyes again. "I'm not hungry."

"You're sure?"

"Just coffee."

"Okay. Coming up. Don't get too comfy. You've got some more pills to take before you hit the sack."

"Pills?"

"Yeah, little round things to make you feel better."

"It'll take more than that, Jack." He rubbed his forehead, fighting off the wave of nausea that came with his words. Biting back the urge to scream, he took several deep breaths before he spoke. "I'm sorry."

"Nothing to be sorry about. You're right. It's going to take a lot more than pills to make any of this right."

"It's never going to be right again."

"Maybe, but it can be okay again. I know that."

"Do you?"

"Yeah. Believe me, I know what it's like to think the world should just stop and understand there's no reason to go on. I've been there."

Daniel didn't answer, didn't want to deal with Charlie's ghost again, not tonight. He had his own haunts and they made for a wicked crew, a wild gallery of voices roaring in his head, screeching for attention, his parents, Sha're, Skarra, so many others he'd disappointed. No, Charlie would have to wait in line awhile longer.

After a few minutes, Jack sat down beside him and nudged his shoulder. "I made it decaf. Don't want to waste the sedative Frasier gave you."

"Thanks." He sat up enough to keep from spilling it, the mug still shaking a little. Glancing over, he noticed Jack watching his unsteady hand. "Sorry. I guess I'm still a little out of it here."

"You want to talk about it yet?"

"No."

"It helps."

"No."

"I figured you'd say that."

"You figured right." He sipped just once and put the bitter brew down, his face twisted as he remembered the first time Sha're served him Abydonian tea after he'd broken a nasty fever. The two drinks didn't taste the same, but the rush of echoes as she spoke his name so lovingly feathered his brain for an instant, the awful ache of needing her again cramping his thoughts. Sha're, his kind wife, the woman he wanted more than life, gone, taken from him, used by the goa'uld for its ugly pleasure.

Just like he was used just a few hours earlier. Shit.

"Daniel?"

"Leave me alone, Jack."

"I don't think so."

Turning his head, he recognized the concern, the force behind his friend's gaze almost painful. "There's no reason to stay. I'll be fine. I'm just going to shower and go to bed."

"I'm not leaving."

"I could kick you out."

"You could try, but considering you can't even hold your own against a coffee mug, I'd probably win. At least 4 out of 5 tries, anyway." The playful tease didn't lessen the concern in the dark eyes as he added, "Even Teal'c couldn't move me out of here tonight."

At the mention of their friend's name, Daniel relaxed and sagged back into the cushions. "How is Teal'c?"

"He's fine. Hathor's chemical, or whatever it was, didn't affect him."

"That's good."

"He's more worried about you."

"Why?"

"Why? Because of what happened. He's a Jaffa. He knows what the goa'uld queens do when they pick out the men they want."

Stiffening, Daniel shook his head. "I don't want to talk about it."

"I can see that."

Pushing up from the sofa, Daniel stood and fought the dizziness as he headed to the bedroom. "I'm going to take a shower. There are linens in the hall closet."

"In the morning then?"

"Yeah. Help yourself to any of the food and just lock the door when you leave."

"I'm not leaving, Daniel. Might as well get used to it."

"Get used to what?"

"I'm your roomie for awhile."

Studying the serious face, Daniel shook his head. "But why?"

"Because you need it. And, frankly, so do I. You weren't the only one hurt by Hathor."

Resting his forehead against the wooden doorway, his words formed slowly. "I know. It's just..."

"Just what?"

"I'm so tired. I can't stand to think about it, about what she wanted to do to you, about how I helped her to almost destroy you."

"For crying out loud, Daniel, that wasn't you."

"As much as I wish that were true, it isn't. The code of life came from me, not you, not anyone else. Me. The chosen one. Her beloved. Fuck, you've got no idea what that felt like."

"You're right. I don't." Jack's voice softened to a hush as he stepped closer, his hand on his shoulder. "So, tell me."

"I can't. Not yet."

"I'll be here when you're ready."

Pulling away, Daniel stepped into his dark bedroom and closed the door between them. Falling back against the frame, he shivered, his desire for Jack almost stronger than his will to fight it. God, he couldn't risk that, not now, not when everyone he ever loved got stolen from him. No, he couldn't afford the selfish luxury of taking the chance of that ever happening again. Jack could never know his feelings. Never.

****************

Hot water stung Daniel's back, the steamy spray rising up to fog his brain. The scratches down his chest and back sizzled edgy nerves, throbbing with his own pulse. Balls heavy, he handled himself carefully, noting the sore swelling. God, he hurt all over, but down there, god, it hurt like nothing he'd ever imagined.

Everywhere between his legs ached from the abuse, complaining with skittish catches up along his spine and into his brain. Memories rushed over him, seeing himself helpless and forced to strip, pushed face down naked on the bed. Her voice became brittle webs layering and capturing his skin before she kneeled over him, her bites alternating with sucking and wispy breaths that smothered him with thick arousal. Long nails shredded his flesh as she raked them down to part his cheeks, to lick and suckle the hole before probing. A cold, slick goo layered inside him as she pushed brutally with several fingers before she urgently commanded him to turn over on his back.

Another feast began, his nipples first, groaning as she drew each one into her mouth, tugging it between strong teeth, his screams trapped in his throat as she devoured him. Straddling his hips, she lowered herself over his cock, the opening tight but slippery. She braced herself upright and shivered, her head back as she stayed still, her icy hold over him slowly turning to fire. He couldn't move, couldn't struggle at all as the scaly thing tickled at his entrance, hissed and shoved inside with a blast of agony. Nothing he did stopped the wriggle as the goa'uld slithered into the ring, made its way deeper, and then fucked him over and over.

Above him Hathor rode him while the thing swelled and matched her rhythm. An ancient cadence rattled, pressure building, his treacherous cock harder than ever. His ass flamed flashes to his brain, his lungs burnt eyond taming. His own hips raised and refused to be still as Hathor and the goa'uld increased their speed, the bite into his prostate final. Bones suddenly exploded, his skull mere dust as everything then melted into coming, the heat pure heaven as he spilled himself inside her.

Her capture complete, she stilled again and the goa'uld withdrew, its screech of triumph silenced as it returned to her body. As she rose to release his cock, she leaned forward to kiss him, her hair feather soft against the catches of his beard. "Beloved, we have joined with you and you have not failed us. We are greatly pleased. You will be rewarded."

His voice silenced, his eyes blinked away the tears as she smiled and left him alone. Straining, he finally managed to make a fist, to groan and roll over. He had to get dressed, to cover the crime, to hide away the shattered pieces of his being.

The knock at the bathroom door jerked him back to the present, the voice of his friend a shock. "Daniel, are you okay in there?"

Bracing himself against the cold blast of the water, he shivered. Shit. "Um, yeah, I'm fine." He hurried to turn off the shower and reached for a towel, his hands still trembling. Wiping himself off quickly, he noted the blood on the cloth and dismissed it. He grabbed the heavy robe and wrapped himself up, his mind still fuzzy from the aftereffects of recalling.

"Come on out, Daniel."

"Give me a minute."

"Just a minute and then I'm coming in."

Daniel used another towel to rub and dry his hair and then ran a comb through it. He didn't bother to put on his glasses. A quick glance in the mirror reflected bloodshot eyes and shadows, his whiskers making his pale skin even whiter. He was just fine. Yeah, right.

***************

"God, Daniel, you're freezing. What the hell were you thinking?"

"The hot water ran out." His teeth actually chattered as Jack draped another blanket around his shoulders. "I guess I lost track of time."

"You figure?" Jack shook his head and patted Daniel's damp hair. "You should dry this before you go to bed."

"Don't worry. I never dry it. Sha're makes fun of how bad it looks when I wake up in the morning." He stopped talking suddenly, his body stiff, not wanting to realize his loss one more time. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to keep bringing her up."

"It's all right, Daniel. She was your wife. It's only natural."

He took a deep breath, his shoulders sagging. "I miss her so much."

"I know." Jack sat down beside him on the bed and put an arm around him, pulling him closer. "It's okay to talk about her."

"The thing is, intellectually I know the odds of rescuing her are against us, but I can't help hoping."

"Nothing wrong with hope." Squeezing a little, Jack mussed his hair before he stood back up. "Now, under the covers, bucko. You need to get some sleep."

Daniel slowly crawled under the comforter and sighed. "I do know one thing."

"What's that?"

"If anyone can save her, you can."

The smile didn't reach his eyes as Jack handed him the medicine. "We'll find her together. You and me and the rest of the team."

"I know." Taking the pills, he put down the glass and slipped further down, his head on the pillow. "It's just sometimes I lose that hope and then I feel, I don't know, empty. I hate thinking about her so helpless." His voice broke, the words wet and faltering.

Jack sat back down and rested his hand on his arm, the heat even through the bedding enticing. "We'll find her and Skarra. You just have to hang in there."

"I'm trying."

"And you've got to stop blaming yourself for everything that happens."

"I will when you stop feeling guilty about Charlie." He wanted to bite off his tongue as soon as he said it.

Jack stood up, his face wounded, his eyes narrowed. "You're tired. Go to sleep."

"I'm sorry, Jack. I shouldn't have said that."

"Good night, Daniel." He walked out and didn't shut the door the least bit gently.

Well, fuck.

***************

The cramps woke him, the blinding force of the pain bringing him upright. "Shit." He groaned and rolled out of bed, stumbling for the bathroom. He managed to make it to the toilet as the first fist of diarrhea hit him, the nausea adding to the feverish spin of the room. Gripping his stomach, he endured the misery hunched over.

"Daniel?"

"Go away."

"Are you all right?"

"Get the fuck away, Jack."

Another wave hit him, the spasm pushing the foul liquid out of his body, burning his ass with each stream. He shook as the cold sweat drenched his skin. Closing his eyes, he had no idea how much time passed before a cool hand pressed against his forehead. Jerking back, he barked, "I said get the fuck away."

"Don't be stupid. You're sick as a dog here. Maybe I should call Frasier."

"No, don't. Please. Just don't touch me yet. I can't stand it."

Both hands up in a surrendering motion, Jack stepped back. "If that's what you want, I'll wait outside."

"Please." He groaned as the knot in his stomach twisted again, expelling the last of the vile remnants of the goa'uld's pleasures.

"Jesus, Daniel, let me at least help you."

"I can't."

"Why the hell not?"

"Just go wait outside."

"You're too damn stubborn, you know that?"

Daniel didn't answer, but waited until the door closed. Taking a deep breath, he managed to clean himself and flush. Washing his hands with soap and hot water, he dried off and then sagged back down on the closed lid, his face in his hands. After a few more moments he stood up and staggered back to his bed, Jack following him the whole time.

"Feeling better?"

"Better than what?"

"Better than the man who just got hit by that truck driving through your bedroom."

"Yeah, a little."

"But you're still not well."

"I will be."

Uneasy, Jack tilted his head, his face still worried. "Would you mind doing me a favor?"

"What?"

"Could I stay in here for awhile?"

"Why?"

"To tell the truth, I'm not sleeping worth shit on your couch. Don't get me wrong, it's a real dream of a couch as couches go, but to be honest, this whole thing with Hathor has freaked me out a little."

"Really?"

"Really."

His mouth dry, Daniel worked to speak before he lost the courage. "Sure."

Dressed in his boxers and T-shirt, Jack climbed in beside him, his body heat a comfort after the chill of illness. "Thanks."

"No problem." Suddenly nervous, Daniel rolled on his side, his back to Jack. "I have to admit, I'm a little freaked out myself."

"Nothing to be ashamed of."

"Um, I know. It's just hard. I don't want to think about it, but it keeps sneaking up on me."

"Like in the shower?"

"Yeah."

Several moments passed as Jack shifted closer, his palm on his back rubbing small soothing circles. "Just close your eyes and go to sleep. I'm here whenever you need me."

Squeezing his eyes shut, he conjured up the image of Jack spooning in closer, of his lips on his neck, his tongue tracing up and licking his ear. An involuntary shudder later, he whispered, "Thank you."



The end